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Summary
A conversation with a rookie idol sets Kibum down a path of no return—and encourages him to take the next step in his relationship with Minho.
A story about what we owe our younger selves and each other.
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Two opposing things couldn’t both be true. The truth, Minho thought, was singular, immutable. Untouchable and unchanging.
Looking back, he had been so young.
(or my little saga of Minho and Kibum through the years)
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Choi Seungcheol-ssi, Mina had said with an encouraging smile. Not one of the more memorable members of his group as far as Jeongyeon is concerned. She likes Boo Seungkwan well enough, especially the way he still grovels at Momo’s feet for a mistake he made forty-five thousand years ago. Gay or not, more men should be like that.
“Kissing?” Seungcheol asks now. Jeongyeon wants to be taken out back and shot.
“Good with me,” chirps Mina.
“No,” grits Jeongyeon.
“Okay,” says Seungcheol.
Bookmarked by aerxplane
12 Oct 2025
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Bookmarker's Notes
“Kissing?” Seungcheol asks now. Jeongyeon wants to be taken out back and shot./
Wants to show Seungcheol how, show him up./
To be honest, Jeongyeon isn’t sure she really even likes sex. She doesn’t think about it much, and it’s unclear if that’s a symptom or the result of idol life. So oversaturated by beauty that all the edges have been shaved off, that desire is some abstract idea that she can take out of the drawer and dust off/
Princess Mina’s ugly side, more beautiful than any fan could dare to dream of./
Blinking slow, Seungcheol’s brows knit together. He looks boyish, puppyish, the way songs used to sound from boygroups when they debuted—please go out with me, I’m clumsy, you make my heart race, you’re the song in my heart type shit. Innocent, Jeongyeon realizes, which only serves to confuse her more./
“No fingers,” reminds Mina, protective. Her brow is furrowed, eyes watching Jeongyeon like a hawk. Like a bodyguard. A queen, ruling over all that is hers./
Even if she was spinning off-kilter, her axis askew, there were eight other planets that had to keep circling the sun, or else she'd come to and there would be a black hole where the universe used to be.
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Seungcheol and Jeonghan’s physical therapy appointments overlap, so they go out to eat afterwards. It’s not a date. But they both have something they desire from each other.
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Bookmarked by aerxplane
22 Jul 2025
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Bookmarker's Notes
“Done?” Seungcheol asks, looking to his physical therapist for mercy. But Eunkyung just laughs and thumps his heaving back.
“Another ten reps,” she says. “Come on, tough guy. You’ve got this.”
“I’m not a tough guy,” Seungcheol whines, but he resumes the single leg squats anyway./
It still hurts sometimes, and the potential for re-injury remains high. Between that and his panic attacks, the military passed him over. He’s still not sure how he feels about that./
Jeonghan is good about managing himself, but it’s a decade-long habit for Seungcheol to at least be aware of the members’ needs./
Jeonghan and his crutches are on the third step now. It’s more than enough for him to look down at Seungcheol disdainfully. “Not that light.”/
So, pride slightly dented, Seungcheol follows Jeonghan./
Jeonghan takes a moment to gather himself, slipping on his stage face,/
Seungcheol corrects himself. “I should probably cut back.”/
Jeonghan sips his moju, considering him over the cup with his eyelids low. He sets it down and swallows before answering. “You look good to me.”
Seungcheol can't help but ask. “You like it?”
“Yeah.” It's just one word, but Jeonghan must think it is too honest because his gaze cuts away, back to his cup. “You seem healthier than you have in a while. It makes you even more handsome.”/
“I could. Seventeen’s Jeonghan can’t.”/
If the baeksuk is even half as good as the appetizers, then Seungcheol understands why Jeonghan insisted on climbing up that damn hill./
The restaurant owner regards him. For some reason, Seungcheol finds himself straightening his posture./
“He’s no granddaughter though.”
“Ah, but he’d be a much better one than me!”/
“Do you really think I'd be better?” he asks./
It's a ridiculous question. But Jeonghan entertains ridiculous questions from the members all the time./
When Jeonghan suddenly shakes his head, Seungcheol first thinks he's irritated at him. He's told Seungcheol to stop staring too many times./
Jeonghan accepts them and examines the cherries closely under the restaurant’s dim lights./
Once the door is closed and the cold evening envelops them, however, Jeonghan reassesses the steep steps. He sighs.
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“You’re back,” he says. It comes out rather bland. A stated fact. A man trying to convince himself he’s still breathing.
Jeonghan’s smile falls. A crease appears between his eyebrows. The same one that Seungcheol used to love smoothing out with the pad of his thumb. “Seungkwannie didn’t tell you?”
(OR: A year after leaving Seungcheol to pick up the pieces of what they could have been, Jeonghan comes home.)