Chapter Text
Of course, Ike would choose Soren in the end.
It wasn’t that Elincia was surprised, or even particularly disappointed. At first, she had been dazzled by the boy – no, the man – who had saved her from certain death. Ike was a capable fighter, a kindhearted person, honest to a fault, and quite handsome to boot. How could she not have fallen for him? But getting to know Ike the person, as opposed to Ike the Savior, had cooled some of her flirtatious feelings towards him.
He was handsome, strong, and kind, but really, he appealed to Elincia as a friend more than as a potential suitor. As she had gotten to know him and the people he cherished, she had seen that there really couldn’t be much of a future for the two of them.
But Soren, on the other hand… That was the certainty. It had become clear to Elincia, gradually, that Soren’s loyalty to Ike extended beyond the bonds of brothers in arms, beyond the respect of staff officer for commander, and even beyond the conventions of friendship. Ike, too, seemed to hold Soren in a different regard than he did for anyone else. The commander was always checking on Soren, asking about his whereabouts, sometimes obviously neglecting his own needs until he was sure that Soren’s were met. Elincia could clearly see the communications between them, when they would seem to speak without words, when a glance was all they needed to convey information.
Was she jealous? Not really. Her primary concern had been for Ike because Soren was such a dour person – such a prickly person, so defensive towards others, so very bitter at times. Traveling with them had shown her that Soren softened only for Ike. It seemed a perilous relationship, but over time, the mage had mellowed towards the others, as well. He was growing, maturing, like every one of them had throughout the war. Elincia’s doubts about them vanished. If anyone could help Soren to become more agreeable, it would be Ike; and Ike seemed so much more relaxed when he was with Soren. It was really only a matter of time before they realized it, themselves.
Therefore, when Ike came to see her that evening, she had no delusions about his intentions.
“Elincia,” he greeted her when she opened the door to her chambers. That people would talk about this – about the general coming to see the queen late at night in her private rooms – probably didn’t even cross his mind. He looked like a man desperate for help, and Elincia was more than glad to put down the mantle of Queen and take up the role of Friend.
“Please, come in,” she offered, stepping aside to allow him to pass. He had dressed in his old ratty clothes, having finished with the court duties for the day, and he flopped onto a settee without grace or care for its delicate design. He looked worried and exhausted. She could tell immediately that something dire was on his mind. “Can I help you with something?” she asked, closing the door quietly.
Ike stared at the intricately patterned rug, tracing the outlines of roses with no real interest. A crease in his brow gave him a confused look. Finally, he said, “I have a problem… and I’m not really sure what to do about it.”
“I’m more than happy to listen,” she said, taking a seat on a poufy stool opposite him. She folded her hands on her crossed knee and waited patiently as he gathered his thoughts.
“I just…” he let out a deep sigh. “I don’t know… how to say it.”
“Please take your time.”
“OK…” Ike breathed for a moment. “So, the thing is… I think I’m…” In the soft light of the glass lanterns, Ike’s face was nearly as red as his cape. Elincia had to stifle a giggle as a thought occurred to her.
“My Lord Ike… Might this matter be personal in nature?”
“I- it is.” Ike nodded, not looking at her.
“And might this perhaps pertain to feelings of… love?”
He looked at her, his eyes slightly widened. The effect was almost comical. “How did you know?”
“Simply a guess,” she said. “Might I venture to name whom you’re interested in?”
“Uh…”
“It wouldn’t be a certain staff officer, would it? Soren?”
Her knowing smile, though not unkind, seemed to embarrass Ike further. He bowed his head. “Was it… that obvious?”
“Perhaps not to an outside observer,” she said gently. “I have noticed you looking at him lately, and the tension between the two of you. Have you told him?”
“No, and that’s the bitch of i- I mean, uh, that’s the thing.” The mercenary had curbed his rough speech fairly well while in court, but he tended to become more casual when he was alone around Elincia. She took that as a compliment – he counted her among his friends, and that was a kind of ease and trust that she cherished. “I don’t know how to do this kind of thing. Elincia, I… I never really saw my parents together.” He looked at her again, his eyes desperate and frustrated. “I don’t know how couples act with each other. I don’t know how they even start. And Soren…” He blushed again. “Soren’s… What if I screw up? What if he doesn’t trust me after this? What if he thinks I’m only…” He couldn’t even finish. The things swirling in his head seemed too horrible to say.
“My Lord Ike,” Elincia said in her most soothing voice, “I am sure that will not be the case. Throughout this war, who was your most loyal companion?”
“Well, Titania, and Mist, and Boyd and Oscar… But…” Ike slumped, suddenly getting her point. “Soren’s… He’s always done everything he can. He always puts the company first.”
Elincia nodded sagely. “Who was always by your side, no matter what?”
“Soren was.”
“Do you really think that he could lose trust in you so easily?” She smiled softly at him. “Have you considered that perhaps he feels the same way for you as you do for him?”
“But I don’t know for sure,” Ike said, letting out a huff. “If I do this wrong, then…”
“It is a simple matter,” Elincia said. “Tell him how you feel. I wouldn’t worry about any sort of premeditated script. In times like these, you can only be honest.”
Ike nodded slowly. “I guess so…” His hands gripped his knees, his elbows stuck out, as if girding himself for battle. “You’re right. All I can do is tell him how I feel. But there’s another problem.” His shoulders drooped again. “I can never find the time! There’s always someone asking for my attention, and when it’s not some political matter, then it’s Soren who’s busy! I found out that he’s been in the library every day, doing research.”
Elincia hummed in thought. “What about the ball tomorrow night? Why not invite him?”
Ike shook his head. “He’d never go to one of those. I wouldn’t want to force him, either.”
“Oh, but think about it,” Elincia said, clasping her hands together as a spark of enthusiasm flared within her. “The two of you could find a secluded balcony, and stand under the stars…”
“Knowing Soren, he would be more worried about all of the other people around us,” Ike said.
“Have you had any luck elsewhere?” Elincia asked sweetly, and Ike was forced to grudgingly admit defeat. “Trust me, it will be quite romantic. An evening ball is the perfect setting for confessing your love.”
Ike snorted. “I guess I should dress well, too… He’d appreciate details like that, wouldn’t he?”
“It seems so,” Elincia said. “You know him best.”
“Yeah… OK.” He squared his shoulders once more. “Thanks, Elincia. I appreciate the support.”
“Any time, my Lord Ike,” she said as he rose to leave.
“I’m gonna ask him to the ball, and I’ll tell him how I feel.”
“I know that you can do it!”
“You’d think,” he said, crossing the room. With his hand on the doorknob, he turned to her with a slightly harried look. “You know, I’d almost rather be back on the battlefield with Ashnard.”
Her stunned laughter followed him into the hallway. He really was astonishing sometimes.
>>><<<
Asking Soren to the ball had been more difficult than Ike had feared. He didn’t want to make it sound like an order, but at the same time, he was determined to have Soren accompany him. Despite Soren’s hesitancy, he agreed without too much prodding. Ike was glad that he hadn’t had to make it an imperative. The last thing he wanted was to force anything on Soren.
Nevertheless, it had been only one hurdle between Ike and his goal. The next was choosing what to wear for such a momentous occasion. The reason for the party itself was mundane enough that he wouldn’t have to make much of an appearance to please the nobles. They were simply honoring the arrival of several returning dignitaries who had been forced to flee during the Daein invasion. There would be no formal dinner, and people would mingle and roam about freely. It was the perfect opportunity to get Soren alone without trapping him somewhere.
Ike looked through the wardrobe of fine clothes that had been given to him over the course of their stay in Melior and found that all of them were lacking in some way: too stiff, too warm, too somber, too understated, too overstated. He had to strike the right note. Soren was a man of meticulous detail. No doubt he would frown on a slovenly appearance, and he would also wrinkle his nose at something gaudy.
The commander settled on blue slacks with a red shirt and jacket, topped with a gold cape lined in blue. It was simpler than some of his other clothes, but nicer than his preferred outfit. It also fit well – lately even his newest clothes were getting a little tight in the arms and chest.
He walked the short distance between his room and Soren’s and knocked on the door. It opened without delay, and Soren stepped out into the hallway.
Ike’s voice caught in his throat for a moment. He had never seen Soren in anything so fine. His outer robe was deep emerald green, shining like silk in the lighted corridor. The gold embroidery at the hem and sleeves gleamed. Beneath was a crisp white garment, but it was cut lower than Soren’s usual clothes, and his pale neck led down to a V of skin at his collar.
It wasn’t that Ike was particularly awed by the clothes themselves; it was that Soren wore them so well. He looked comfortable in them, like he had been wearing these sorts of things all of his life. Though his posture was tense as usual, the gentle curvature of his waist and his slim shoulders fitted the elegant garment perfectly. He looked as if he might be a visiting noble – even a prince. Ike could vividly imagine a silver circlet crowning his head.
“Ready?” Ike asked when he found his voice again. Soren nodded, and they started out for the ballroom. Ike knew the way already; Soren followed at a sedate pace.
As they walked, Ike couldn’t fight the urge to apologize. “Sorry for asking you to do this. You don’t look so well… Are you sure you’re up for it?”
“Yes, Ike.” Soren’s voice was toneless. Ike stopped, halting Soren in his tracks, and turned to look at him.
“I never see you at meals, and Titania says you haven’t been sleeping again. If this is too much for you, then…” Such an idiot, Ike thought of himself. Why had he tried to drag Soren out here in the first place? He was obviously under a lot of stress.
“Really, I’m fine. I just don’t feel at ease here. That’s all.”
The slight smile on Soren’s face was forced, but the effort was a bit reassuring. Ike resumed walking, making sure that Soren was still following. “To be honest,” he said, “I don’t, either. I’m glad that at least you understand.”
They reached the ballroom in time to catch Elincia greeting partygoers at the doors. She beamed when she saw them. “My Lord Ike! And Soren! How nice to see you both.”
Ike gave her a nod, and by the way she caught his eye, she seemed to know how nervous he was. She smiled at him and gave a little crinkle of her nose; he looked down at his newly shined shoes, wondering if she was secretly laughing at him. He was supposed to be a hero, and here he was quaking in his boots over a simple conversation.
When he looked up again, Soren was gone. For a moment, he thought that perhaps his companion had decided to flee, after all. He whipped his head around, looking for a glint of ebony and emerald, but Elincia put her hand lightly on his shoulder.
“I saw him go into the ballroom,” she said. They were surrounded by people coming and going, and so she didn’t say anything further, besides a polite, “Please enjoy your evening, General.” But Ike knew that she was wishing him luck, and he appreciated it. He nodded to her once more as he ducked into the crowd and began his search.
He was hailed a few times, from all sides. Normally, he at least gave a cursory acknowledgement to whomever was talking to him, no matter how irritating the interruption. Tonight, he was on a mission. He didn’t even glance towards the nobles who called to him, and he deftly avoided those who came over to him. He didn’t care if it was seen as rude. He had to find Soren and get this burden off of his chest before the anticipation drove him insane.
For a moment, he was driven by blind panic. Soren hated crowds, perhaps even more than Ike did. He hadn’t seemed well ever since the battle with Ashnard, and Ike was worried that maybe he was suffering from some lingering injury, after all. Ike hadn’t been present while Soren was being healed; it was possible that the mage was hiding something. If he was cornered by overly eager nobles, if someone encroached on his space…
If someone recognized his brand…
Since learning more about the treatment most Branded received, Ike had become a little more cautious of Soren’s wellbeing. He didn’t like not knowing where he was. It was this fear that sharpened his mind in the midst of the confusion. Suddenly, he thought, where would Soren go in a place like this? He stopped, looked around, and found an open space near the doors to the grand balcony. Night air was moving freely into the ballroom, gently rustling the elaborate gowns of the ladies. Ike moved in that direction, ignoring a nobleman who approached with his hopeful-looking daughter.
Soren was indeed outside, standing near the railing. There was another man with him. Soren was visibly uncomfortable, leaning away as the man crowded closer to him. Ike sped up, until he was practically standing between the two. The man backed away immediately. Ike recognized him as one of Elincia’s courtiers, a man with minor power in some province of little importance. His sharp eyes widened when he recognized Ike.
“Is everything alright, Soren?” Ike asked, never taking his eyes off of the duke.
Before Soren could answer, the man said, “Why, General. I wasn’t sure if you would attend tonight.”
“Yeah, I came. What do you want with Soren?”
Surprise registered on the duke’s face. “Soren?” He looked to the mage, eyeing him critically. “You wouldn’t be the tactician who won us the war?”
Soren’s voice was carefully even. “That’s right.”
Ike could recognize the shift in the man’s demeanor. It had happened around him a lot – the moment where a noble realized that they were dealing with someone who might help them win favor at court. The carefully crafted veneer of deference never failed to make Ike’s skin crawl. “I took you for a boy,” the man said, his voice oozing with solicitude. “Forgive me. If I had known—”
“It’s fine.” Soren would never be fooled by such tricks, and Ike felt somewhat vindicated as the mage turned to look at him, effectively dismissing the duke. “Ike, did you need something from me?”
The duke slunk away, recognizing a loss when he saw one. Ike watched him retreat. “Let’s go for a walk,” he said to Soren, turning to lead the way even as he glared after the duke. He hadn’t liked the man’s body language one bit. Something about it put him on edge; he had never seen anyone talk to Soren like that. Had he been threatening him? As much as Ike wanted to demand an answer, his greater desire was to get Soren as far from this place as possible.
Ike had been to the gardens in recent weeks, and the repairs were progressing well. He noted that several more shrubs and flowers had been planted since his last visit. He led Soren through the path, heading for a corner that he knew would still be unfinished. Just yesterday, he had heard the steward complaining about the delay in a tile shipment from Begnion.
“It should be quieter over here.” They were now beyond the borders of the party, past anyone who might overhear them. Ike stepped over the rope boundary that delineated the unfinished section. Soren followed, subdued as he had been since the end of the war, and once more Ike began to doubt. Was this really the right time? Soren was obviously struggling with something, whether a physical ailment or a mental one. Something was heavy on his mind, and Ike was just complicating it by dumping his feelings on him.
Then he remembered what Elincia had said, and he took courage from it. Soren had always been by his side. And if Ike expected Soren to share his burdens, then Ike would do well to be open and honest with him in return. He had to say it. He had to do this.
The commander took a deep, steadying breath of cool air. “Easier to think out here, huh?” he said.
Soren responded quietly. “Mm. It is.”
Ike intended to continue on his course; but something else was bothering him. He decided to get it out of the way. “What was that guy talking to you about?”
Soren seemed a little surprised. “Oh, him? He thought I was some nobleman’s son. He was probably hoping that he could buy me for the night.”
“Buy you?” Ike made a face, catching on to the implication. “He didn’t think…” He was familiar with the practice of prostitution, having grown up in a mercenary company with agents who frequented such services. But Soren looked nothing like the bawdy women who called out from tavern doorways.
Soren explained with indifference. “It’s not uncommon for young men to make themselves available to a nobleman. The boy gets showered with presents and contacts, and the man gets his rocks off. It’s an advantageous arrangement, if disturbing.”
Ike cringed. “I thought… I mean, aren’t these people mostly married?”
Soren gave a snort. “You’re quite naïve if you think that they remain loyal. It’s common for a nobleman to take a mistress or two.”
“Huh. I guess we country folk are simpler.” Ike paused, feeling that the moment had come. It was a perfect opportunity to broach the subject. “I always believed that once you find the love of your life, you stay with them forever.”
Soren’s answer was as cynical as expected. “If only everyone could be as straightforward and loyal as you.”
“Heh. Straightforward…” Ike ran a hand through his hair. “Sometimes, I’m hardly straightforward. Or, it’s more like I don’t always know what to say.” He had always lived his life with the intention to be honest. His father had taught him that honesty was the best policy. But honesty came with its price, and sometimes Ike wondered if tact might be a better approach. He had almost none of that.
“Ike, you are the most honest person I know,” Soren said. “Whether you know what to say or not, you always say what you feel. That is more admirable than tact.”
It was as if Soren could read his mind. Ike felt guilty – like he was once more asking Soren to do the impossible, to find the logical pattern in a jumble of confusion, when Ike should have been the one to state his own thoughts. Soren was always having to look through him. Sometimes, Ike wondered if Soren knew him better than he knew himself. He wondered what Soren would think when the confession finally came. Would he be frightened? Confused? Angry? Threatened? Would he go along with it simply because Ike was his friend and commander? Was Ike exercising his authority in an inappropriate way?
“Something’s on your mind?” Soren always knew. It would only add to the confusion if Ike continued to dance around the issue.
This is Soren, Ike thought. Right now, they weren’t commander and staff officer. They were two friends, two people who had known each other for years, who had fought beside each other through impossible situations. He took a steadying breath. “Yeah,” Ike said after a moment. “Yeah, I’ve been… I’ve been thinking a lot.” He turned to look at Soren, who was gazing at him intently. Ike’s heart beat faster. “Lately, I feel like there’s something I’ve left undone. There’s something else I have to do.”
“What do you mean?”
Ike sat on a crate of gardening supplies, and gestured to Soren, who sat next to him. “I defeated the Black Knight. I defeated Ashnard.” He looked up at the sky, studying the pattern of stars. “But there’s still something I have to do… and it’s probably harder than anything I’ve done before.” Soren stayed silent, and Ike knew that he was listening, giving him time to arrange his words in his head. He took the opportunity, and only spoke again when he felt his thoughts clarify.
“I always think that I’ve done my best to express my feelings to people. I wanted to let everyone know how much they mean to me, in case…” He knew that he didn’t have to finish that sentence. Soren would know what he meant. His chest was already tight; he couldn’t afford to get emotional now. “Lately, though, I’ve been thinking that I didn’t really understand my own feelings well enough. I don’t know much about… romance.”
Beside him, Soren tensed just slightly. Ike pushed on, fearing that he would lose his nerve if he delayed any longer. “I don’t really know anyone who would know. It’d be too weird to talk to Mist about it. Titania would also be… awkward. Boyd would laugh at me. Oscar wouldn’t know. Rhys would be too embarrassed… So, I went to Elincia.”
“O- oh?” There was a slight tremor in Soren’s voice now.
“I asked her about it all… How love works. Romantic love. She told me some things.”
“Did she?”
Ike looked at Soren, who was staring down at the ground. Did Soren see it coming? Was he already gearing up to reject his only friend? The more Ike’s mind raced with the thoughts of all that could go wrong, the faster he spoke, as if his tongue were eager to push it all out regardless of the consequences. He fought with himself as he said, “I didn’t understand a lot of what she said. I don’t really get the… ins and outs of it. But I do understand one thing: The way you feel for someone… for that one person you want to spend your life with… It’s different from how you feel about family or friends.”
Soren nodded. Ike’s heart constricted. He had to explain, he had to make Soren understand.
“When I think about losing any of you… it hurts. It hurts a lot. But I can see myself moving on, somehow. Like I moved on from Father’s death. There’s only one person who is so… so important to me. I don’t know that I could move on, if…”
Finally, those red eyes met his. Ike’s heart stopped for a moment. “Soren…” he breathed, sinking to his knee, unable to keep still any longer for the anxiety seizing his gut. He took Soren’s hand. “During that last battle, when you were hurt… I never realized…” He cleared his throat, remembering the sheer terror he had felt when the spear had struck through Soren’s side. Then he dismissed the memory; he had to focus on the here and now. “I’m still not really clear on any of this. I don’t know what I’m doing. But I…”
“Ike…”
“I love you,” Ike said before he really meant to. Then the words came spilling out in a torrent, and he was unable to stop them. “For a long time, I knew you were important to me. I never knew why.” Soren’s eyes were wide. “I don’t know if this is the same kind of love that my father felt for my mother. I don’t know if it’s the same thing they write about in poems. But I know that if I were to lose you, I couldn’t ever recover. I couldn’t ever forget… or move on.” He felt like he was falling through space, out of control. It was like riding on the back of a Pegasus, like being thrown through the air in the aftermath of a blast of magic.
“I…” Soren didn’t seem to know what to say. “Ike, I…”
“Will you stay with me?” It was the distillation of all of his questions, all of his fears and hopes. Whether Soren would accept a romantic relationship or not, Ike just wanted him to stay. Even if they could never be more than friends, he needed Soren in his life.
Ike’s breath left his lungs when Soren said, “Yes… Ike, I always wanted…” Red eyes were glistening in the lamplight. “I would be very happy if I could stay by your side…”
And just like that, Ike lived again. “Thank you,” he said, almost sighed. He stood, taking Soren with him.
Soren shook his head, hiding his face behind his hair. “No, I… You don’t think… What about your future?”
“Hopefully, you’ll be there with me,” Ike said. He didn’t understand what Soren was talking about. Of course, they would always be together.
“Don’t you want a family?”
The implications became clear. Ike glanced back at the palace, at the lighted pathways and the distant figures of the mingling nobles. “I have one,” he said, turning back to Soren. “Soren, I don’t care how many marriage offers I get. I just want you.”
“Ike…”
He took Soren into his arms, and was elated to feel Soren squeezing him back, holding him tightly about the waist. His arms encircled Soren’s shoulders, one hand coming to rest at the back of his head. He tried not to crush Soren as he hugged him close. This felt right, he thought. It felt the way it should feel, with a perfectly fitted warmth against his body. Soren was trembling, and Ike held him all the tighter for it, steadying him and comforting him without words.
“Does this…” Soren muttered against Ike’s neck. “Are we… l- lovers now?”
Ike smiled slightly at the word. “I guess we are. I don’t really care what it’s called. I just want you to stay with me.”
“Always… I always will.” Soren’s voice was so quiet that Ike could hardly hear him, but the way Soren held onto him made his answer clear.
Ike couldn’t help himself. He pulled back and took Soren’s chin in his fingers, tilting his face up until their eyes met once more. He leaned down, pulling Soren up gently, until he felt warmth on his lips and a soft yielding that had his knees threatening to give out. It didn’t last long – he didn’t want to screw up his very first kiss. But when he leaned back, Soren was smiling at him, and Ike returned the expression. For a long moment, they just smiled at each other, studying each other’s eyes. Ike’s heart was ready to melt when Soren finally hid his face back in Ike’s chest.
“So, then,” Ike said with a slight quirk of his lips. “That settles it. Sealed with a kiss, right?”
“Yes…” Soren’s voice trembled like the rest of him.
Ike took Soren’s hand and tugged him towards the palace. “We already made our appearance… Let’s go.”
They walked side by side, hand in hand, and Ike felt lighter than he had in a long time.
>>><<<
“You never told me what was bothering you.”
It was late. The ball was probably winding down by now, though Ike and Soren had abandoned it hours ago. They were sitting in Soren’s room, staring into the fireplace and leaning against each other. For hours they had talked, their conversation punctuated with periods of comfortable silence. They had indulged in just being together, and neither was eager to end their little vacation from the rest of the palace. When someone had come knocking at the door, neither had answered, instead pretending that they weren’t even there until the would-be visitor had given up and gone away.
Now, Ike spoke to begin another round of conversation. Soren looked up at him, still nuzzled against his shoulder. “What do you mean?” Soren asked.
“All this time, ever since the battle…” Ike frowned, adjusting his hold around Soren’s waist gently. “You’ve been acting like you’re not feeling well. Is it your injury?”
Soren shook his head, settling back against Ike’s side. “I was… trying to tramp down my disappointment,” he said with some hesitation. “During Queen Elincia’s coronation, when you came out holding her hand… I…”
Ike’s frown only deepened. “What do you mean?”
“You were leading her by the hand, and it looked like…” Soren’s hand curled around Ike’s fingers. “You seemed very… intimate with her. You never took your eyes off of her.”
Ike thought back to that day. “I was just giving her some encouragement,” he said, bewildered. “Did you think I was… What exactly did you think?”
“Ike, don’t make me…” Soren buried his face in that broad chest, blushing furiously. “Everyone knew. Everyone thought that it was a match made in heaven – the Savior of Crimea and the beautiful queen… It’s a love story that practically writes itself.”
Ike blinked, and then laughed. His quaking shoulders dislodged Soren, who sat up and stared at him. Ike couldn’t help himself, though. He chuckled more freely than he had in months. “Are you saying that people think I’m courting Elincia?”
“Well, yes!” Soren seemed flustered. “Even I thought so! I thought that you would naturally choose her. I know that you have never coveted wealth or power, but she is beautiful, and she adores you. You rescued her, after all, and…”
“Wait a minute,” Ike said, cutting Soren off. “I help lots of people. And she hired us, so after that, it was only natural that I’d do whatever I could to achieve her goals. You drafted the contract yourself! You know that.”
“But, Ike, she’s—”
“She’s a good friend, and a good ruler.” Ike looked into Soren’s eyes meaningfully. “She’s brave and smart and capable, and I’m proud of her. I’m glad to see how much she’s grown since we met. I’m glad things worked out for her. But I’m not interested in her. Not like that. She can never be you. It’s you who’s been with me all this time, and you’ve never let me down. I trust you completely. And besides, she’s a queen! What the hell would I do with myself, living in a place like this?”
When Soren just looked at him, Ike pulled him close again. “You know, you’re a genius, but you are really bad when it comes to emotions,” the commander said.
“Not that you’re much better…” Soren muttered in half-hearted rebuke.
“Yeah,” Ike chuckled softly. “At least I have an excuse, though. I’m not too bright.” Before Soren could protest, he added, “At least, compared to you. I thought you’d have figured out by now how I feel about you.”
“I… I didn’t believe that I deserved something like this.” Soren’s voice was quiet again.
“None of that.” Ike buried his nose in soft black hair. Soren’s scent was like soap and parchment, familiar and comforting. “There’s no reason to think about deserving or not deserving. We’re here now and we’re together.”
“Yes, Ike.” Soren held on like he was drowning. Ike held him just as close.
“You know, Elincia was the one who gave me a little push to confess to you tonight,” Ike said after another prolonged silence.
“Really?” Soren sounded skeptical.
“She did,” Ike said seriously. “She said she knew for a while, how I felt about you… and I think she even knew that you felt the same. She said as much, now that I think on it.”
“Hm. She’s not as oblivious as I believed.”
“Soren.” Ike’s scolding tone was mostly jocular. He rubbed Soren’s back lightly.
“Well, I suppose that I ought to send her a card or some fruit or something,” Soren sighed. “If she truly was instrumental in this turn of events, then I owe her a great deal.”
“I would have gotten around to it by myself,” Ike said, somewhat put out. “Maybe not so soon, but eventually.”
“And by that time, perhaps I would have taken Stefan up on his offer and run off with him to the desert.”
Ike bristled. “Stefan? Why Stefan?!”
Soren didn’t want to say why. He didn’t want to tell Ike that he and Stefan were the same – that they were both cursed to outlive their beorc companions. He didn’t want to admit that he had been thinking about the future, and he had concluded that perhaps he would have no choice but to join Stefan’s village once Ike had gone.
Thankfully, Ike provided a distraction. “You really go for swordsmen, don’t you?”
Soren had to stifle a laugh. “What?”
“I know he’s more experienced, but I still say I could beat him!” Ike was getting heated now, and Soren couldn’t hold back his mirth. “What’s so funny?”
“Are you jealous of Stefan, of all people?”
Ike blushed. “Well, you were jealous of Elincia.” Something occurred to him then. “Hey, what about Aimee? You never felt threatened by her, did you?”
Soren shook his head. “I knew you weren’t interested in her. But Elincia… As I said, everyone thought that you would end up together.”
“Huh.” Ike pulled Soren down with him, so that they were both lying on the settee. Ike was too tall for it, and Soren had to lie on top of him to fit, but it was comfortable enough. “Here you were worrying about Elincia, and all I could think about was how to tell you my feelings…”
Soren snorted. “When have you ever put so much thought into anything?”
“I didn’t want to screw it up.” Ike was perfectly serious. “I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable around me. If you didn’t feel the same way, then I didn’t want us to stop being friends, at least. And if you thought that I was exercising my authority, or forcing you, or…”
That train of thought was derailed by a kiss. Brief and tender, it was still thrilling. Ike thought that he wouldn’t mind being interrupted, if only Soren would always do it this way. The mage was smiling down at him shyly when he pulled back. “I know you better than that,” he said. “You would never use your position like that.”
Ike’s expression softened, the tension easing away. “We’re both hopeless, huh?”
By way of answer, Soren just nestled against Ike’s solid body. Quite the contrary, Soren had never felt so hopeful.