Chapter Text
With Mommy, Natasha was used to sharing. Tony had invited her in, but Mommy was his before she was ever Tasha's. And in a way it was good, having a little brother in Tony. It meant she got to help Mommy and be a big girl sometimes, and she got to show Tony how to do all sorts of cool things because she was bigger. And when Tony needed his mommy, Tasha could go find Daddy. Because Daddy was hers. and he was only hers.
But that was before.
Now Daddy had Bucky and it was all wrong. The first night he cried and screamed and she could hear him two floors up. What had they done to her poor sladkiy (Sweet one), her snezhinka (snowflake), to make him hurt so much? She had seen, once, how they controlled him. They threatened to do that to her and the others if they were bad.
But that didn't make her feelings any less confusing. And then Loki had to go and mess everything up more by making him into a baby. Literally. What was going to happen now? Daddy had everything. He had someone special to do grown-up stuff with, to love and hug and kiss. And now he had a real baby, not someone like Tasha. Where was her place now? Would daddy even want her around now?
* * *
She spent the first day moping on the floor of the nursery until Tony came in from the lab. He was clearly big, which happened sometimes, but he was clean and laid beside her. "It's Bucky, isn't it?" He asked.
Natasha nodded and curled against Tony. He smelled nice, like cinnamon and spice and he was really warm. Not like daddy was, but close enough. "What's gonna happen to me? He won't need me now," she whimpered.
"I felt kind of the same way when you came around," Tony admitted. "I thought, since Mommy had a little girl, that she wouldn't want me. I'm a boy and boys are icky and messy and a lot of work. Especially me."
"Wha' happen'd?" Tasha asked around her thumb.
"I got clingy, but then you butted in and made sure I was okay, and felt the need to help mommy. but once I was big I talked to her and she made me feel better. And then you tugged me around everywhere," Tony giggled. Tasha smiled. She was glad she had her silly baby brother to make things a little easier.
* * * *
Mommy and Tony were going away, so Tasha usually went to stay with Steve when that happened. That way, if she needed little time or cuddles or anything, Daddy was right there to make it better. Only things weren't the same, not at all.
For starters, Sam opened the door, not Daddy. "Hey munchkin," He greeted warmly enough. Natasha frowned.
"Where's Steve?" She asked.
"Putting Bucky down for his nap," Sam explained. This only made Natasha frown deeper. It wasn't nap time. Only Tony took stupid naps during the day, and he never took his this early. "Hey, talk to me. What's going on in that brain of yours?"
"Wouldn't you like to know," Natasha hissed. She stomped down the hall, only to find her room... taken over.
There was a bed for a real baby where hers was supposed to be. Not only that but her toy chest was gone, and in it's place was a changing table that was just the right size for a real baby all loaded up in its place. Daddy was in the corner, sitting in a rocking chair that would never hold them both, singing to Bucky softly, something his mother probably sang to him. Her chest tightened, her throat closed up, and then.... she let out an enormous sob. Daddy didn't want her!
"Hey hey, shh, princess you're early," Steve said, getting up and trying to settle the now fussy infant in his arms. "Hey, don't cry angel. Tell you what. How about you go sit on the sofa with Sam, and when I'm done I'll show you a surprise."
That's not what Tasha wanted to hear. Where were her toys? And her bed? And where was she going to sleep now? All of this because of a stupid baby! Tony was wrong. There was no way daddy still wanted her around. Well, if he wanted a baby so bad, then maybe she could be one too. She gave a teary nod and left to the sofa. Sam gave her a concerned look, but said nothing, opening his arms. Natasha ignored them and curled up in a ball on the sofa, crying. She had to be a baby. That was the only way she would get to keep Daddy.
When Daddy finally came back out, Natasha was calmer, but still upset. "Hey princess. I'm sorry that took so long. Bucky was just up late last night." He quickly scooped her up into his arms. "You must be hungry, hmm?" Tasha nodded, burying her face in Daddy's neck. "How about we go fix you some nummies and then we can play, hmm?"
Tasha nodded, her thumb in her mouth. Her plan was working perfectly. Daddy carried her to the kitchen, and set her down in the chair. No, that wouldn't do at all. She whined and reached for him. Daddy blinked,
"Baby I can't make you nummies one handed," He tried to explain.
"No! Up!" Tasha insisted. Steve sighed, but picked her up. There, much better. "Hung'y Daddy."
"I know baby. Let's see, what can Daddy make one handed, hmm?" Steve asked, going through the cabinets. He came across some baby food. Tony ate it sometimes, when his tummy wasn't so happy or he was feeling extra little. Except Mommy always made it fresh for the baby, and made sure he always got a bottle or a real meal later. But...
"That!" Tasha declared, pointing at the jars. Steve gave her a dubious look. "Tasha that's for Bucky. Wouldn't you rather have something else?" The little girl shook her head, red curls whipping around. Steve sighed. He needed Sam's take on this.
"Okay, if that's what you want," He answered, taking out a jar of squash and carrots. Natasha had the faint inclination it looked like pureed earwax. It tasted about like that too. How could babies eat this stuff?! But she had to, if Daddy wanted a baby. She'd once gone two weeks on nothing more than breadcrusts. She could deal with this.
* * * *
As Steve settled a sleeping Natasha on his bed with her blankie, Sam walked in. "J said you needed me?" He asked.
"Yeah, I'm worried about Natasha," Steve said. "She's acting.... different. Younger. A lot younger."
"And? Are you sure it's not just sibling rivalry?" Sam asked. "Kids do that sometimes, acting out because they think their parents love the new kid more than them or feel jealous."
"But she has to know I still love her," Steve sighed. "How could she doubt that?"
"Think about it Steve, it's Natasha," Sam said pointedly. "She has more secrets than Fury. How do you think she came to be like that?"
"Touche," Steve sighed. "How can you tell though? Like if it is this sibling rivalry?"
"Did this just start today?" Sam asked. Steve nodded slowly. "Then yes, it probably is. You're just gonna have to establish that she's still just as important to you as before. Basic parenting stuff."
Steve nodded. That made sense. "I just hope she likes her new room."
"She's gonna love it Stevie," Sam said, hugging his partner. "Now then. I believe you and I have a beef to settle."
"You're still sore about Mario Kart?" Steve chuckled.
"You red-shelled me out of nowhere man!"
* * * *
When Tasha woke up she was alone. She could hear Daddy and Sam out in the living room. Even being a dumb baby right didn't work! That tore it, Bucky needed to go away and fast. Oh! "Loki?" She whispered.
The sorcerer appeared in front of her. "Tasha?"
"Bucky's gotta go," She declared. "He's taking Daddy away from me!"
"Tasha I don't think... well," Loki sighed. "I can take him home with me and Dada."
Tasha smirked. "An' he stays with YOU."
Loki shrugged. "Always wanted a baby brother." Tasha smirked evilly, peeking out in the hall. Daddy and Sam were doing their grown-up kissing on the couch. She motioned for Loki to follow her. She half crawled and half tiptoed into Bucky's room, where Loki was already waiting. It was still kind of irritating that Loki could just teleport, but then she remembered that Bucky had taken over her room. She looked into the stupid baby's crib, where Bucky was sleeping. Hmph!
"Help me up," Natasha whispered. Loki sighed, getting on his hands and knees next to the crib. Natasha quickly maneuvered herself into the crib, picking up the baby. Bucky was.... weird. He was soft and squishy, not at all the Daddy-stealing monster he really seemed to be. was he really... Well, better she send him to live with Loki than risk losing Daddy. "Here, Natasha said, handing the sleeping baby over.
Loki held Bucky close, looking thoughtfully at Natasha. "are you certain this is what you want?" he asked
"uh huh. Now go before Daddy comes back," Natasha whispered, landing lightly on her feet as she climbed back out of the crib. Loki nodded, vanishing. Tasha smirked. Now where were all of her toys...?
* * * *
"Steve."
"Mm," The super soldier murmured.
"It's been almost two hours," Sam pointed out. "Bucky never sleeps this long, and if Tasha has been this quiet-"
"That means trouble," Steve sighed. "But you're comfy."
"And you're an idiot," Sam said, poking Steve's belly. Steve laughed, before getting up. "Don't take too long."
"Never," Steve said with a quick kiss. He gently padded down the hall to the nursery, stopping dead in his tracks. The room was completely turned on it's head. Every drawer was open and empty, furniture was on its side, and in the middle stood Tasha, glaring daggers at the wall. Steve should have approached calmly. He had every intention to. But when he saw the crib untouched and completely empty, he lost his temper. "Natasha!" He barked, causing the red-head to glare at her daddy.
"What?" She snapped, between headspaces and VERY unhappy that her stuff was missing.
"Where is Bucky?" Steve demanded through clenched teeth.
"What does it matter? He's just a dumb baby!" Natasha hissed. "I'm more important! But you got rid of MY stuff in MY room!"
Steve had had it. he quickly grab Natasha by the arms. "Natasha this isn't a game! Now tell me where Bucky is or your punishment is going to be even worse!"
Natasha went pale, shaking. It was then she pulled the one card that she hoped she never would have to; her safe word. "Russia," she whispered, causing Steve's eyes to widen. He let go of her and the little girl scampered back into a corner, breathing shallow and eyes whipping around, trying to assess everything, to defend herself.
"Natasha," Steve said delicately. "I'm sorry. I lost my temper. I am NOT going to hurt you."
"They all say they that, it doesn't mean anything," she choked out, assessing Steve. She hadn't done that since the day that he found her, wet and icky in the nursery the day after New York. It stung, but Steve deserved it.
"Natasha, I am not going to hurt you. but I need to know where Bucky is," Steve insisted. "Then I am going to go get him while you breathe and calm down."
"With Loki. Don't-"
"I won't. Sam is just going to sit with you, okay?" Sam. Sam was safe. He would never hurt anyone. He had always been the one hurt. Natasha nodded slowly, trying to breathe the way she always helped Bubby to breathe when he was so scared. Steve backed out of the room, hands up, and it wasn't until he was gone that the tears began to fall. Why didn't Daddy love her anymore?
* * * *
With Bucky safe and sound (And coming home after Tasha was in bed), Steve returned home o comfort his little girl. Provided she even let him near her. When he walked in, Natasha was almost completely little again, her thumb in her mouth as she sniffled, trying to keep her crying soft. However Sam had a gentle hand on her shoulder.
"Oh Tasha," Steve murmured, getting on his knees to meet her on eye level.
"I'm- Sorry- Daddy," She hiccupped, feeling so bad. Now daddy was gonna kick her out and not love her and tell mommy and then she would be all alone and-
"Can I hug you Tasha?" Steve asked. Tasha looked at him like he was crazy, before throwing herself into Daddy's arms. "Sweetie I love you. Nothing will ever change that. Can you let me prove that to you?"
"Sam come too?" Tasha hiccupped. Steve smiled and nodded. Both men took her hand, leading her to the end of the hall, where Daddy's art studio was supposed to be. "Daddy?" She asked. Steve opened the door, and she gasped.
Daddy's studio had been remade into a bedroom. A bedroom for HER. The far left had dancers painted on it, but not the deadly dancer she was. Gentle pinks with tutu's and delicate pointe shoes, below which were all her toys, and a few new ones. the window had gentle pink curtains hanging from it, and on the wall on the right... her name was delicately painted on the wall, her bed directly below it with her favorite blankie, the one that only Daddy had, the one that went on missions. Daddy hadn't forgotten her at all. He had made her a special place, a place all her own.
"Do you like it?" Daddy asked. As if she could NOT like it!
"I love it Daddy!" She declared, throwing her arms around his neck. Steve smiled, hugging her back. "I'm sorry I was so mean to Bucky."
"It's okay, But you need to apologize to Bucky too," Steve said firmly. Natasha nodded. That was fair.
* * * *
It was after bedtime, and Tasha knew she probably she shouldn't be out of bed. But she had to do this. She snuck out, tiptoeing into Bucky's room.
"Hi Bucky," Tasha whispered. "I'm sorry I was so mean to you today. It wasn't very nice. But I was kinda jealous. Cuz you were Daddy's before I was even alive. Before I even had a birth mommy. Except maybe my birth mommy was around when you were. Oh well. But I promise I'm gonna be the best Sissy ever. Just like I am to Tony. you're gonna like growing up here. I promise." then she climbed gently into his crib, kissing him delicately on the forehead. "Sleep well, malen'kiy soldat,(little soldier)" She whispered. Daddy was in the door, smiling proudly at her. She blushed, and he offered her his hand, taking her back to her room.