Chapter Text
'I don't know,' Liam says despondently. He lets his head thunk down onto Mason's bed with a despairing thud. 'He let me hold his hand, Mason. What am I supposed to do now?'
'Well, did you talk about it at all?' Mason says patiently. 'At any point during or afterwards?'
Liam moans and lifts his head up for the sole purpose of thudding it back down again. 'Ughhhh. Nope,' he says, muffled into Mason's bedspread, then rolls over to starfish dramatically on his back, the better to go on bemoaning the situation. 'We just sort of. Held them. Without talking. For like, twenty minutes.' It had probably been his favourite twenty minutes of his life so far, Theo's hand curled gently around his, but he would have liked to have come out of the situation with a bit more clarity on their actual relationship status.
'Oh my god,' Mason says, shaking his head. 'I can't even – do you realise how freaking adorable that is, dude? You just sat there together holding hands quietly for twenty minutes?’
Liam makes another groaning noise and covers his face with his hands; it serves to hide not only his flushed cheeks but the helpless little smile at the corners of his mouth. ‘Ugh. Shut up,’ he says. It had been so adorable, is the thing. He hasn’t been able to stop thinking about Theo in that hoodie since, or the way his eyes had been so wide and watchful, his fingers trembling against the fleece as Liam had touched them.
He parts his fingers after a moment to peek out at Mason with one eye. ‘Seriously, though, Mase. You’ve gotta help me out here.’
‘Okay, okay, we’ve got this,’ Mason says soothingly. ‘I mean, you have to know how much of a massive, obvious thing he has for you, right? I actually don’t think you could mess this up if you tried. He’ll take anything you give him.’
Liam drops his hands away from his face, the playfulness of the last few minutes falling away with them and leaving him thoughtful, a little sober. He sits up and crosses his legs, looks down at Mason’s bedspread. ‘That’s what I’m worried about,’ he says after a second, quiet, and looks back up to meet Mason’s eyes. ‘Look, I think – maybe you're right, maybe he does feel that way about me. But I – ' He stops, picking at the bedspread, frustrated at his inability to put his thoughts into words. 'I want to do this right,' he settles on eventually, softly.
When he glances back up, Mason's watching him. 'You really care about him,' he says softly.
'Yeah,' Liam says, quiet. 'Yeah, I... god, it's just – I know what he's done, okay? I do. I know Stiles is never going to trust him, probably. But – they hurt him, Mase.' He swallows, thinking about the things Scott had seen in Theo's head, the things that Theo had let Scott show to Liam, as well. Not everything, but. Enough. ‘They – it was bad. Really bad.’
'I know,' Mason says gently. 'So does Corey and everyone else. Even Stiles.'
'He cries at night sometimes,' Liam blurts out. 'God, he'd hate me telling you that. I don't think he even knows I know, he tries to be so quiet about it. I just...' He gnaws his lip. 'I don't want to hurt him more, you know?'
‘Hurt him?’ Mason says, and when Liam glances back at him he’s smiling slightly. ‘Liam, you’re quite literally the best thing that’s ever happened to him.’
Liam swallows. ‘No pressure then, fuck,’ he mumbles. ‘“You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to the traumatised child soldier, Liam. What could go wrong?”’
Mason sighs. ‘Stop catastrophising, you drama queen. Liam, you have the best heart of anyone I know, okay? Theo is going to be fine, better than fine. He’s probably screaming into his pillow right now like a twelve-year-old because his crush held his hand.’
‘I could still hurt him!’
‘He could hurt you, too,’ Mason points out. ‘I mean, a lot of people would say that’s the more likely scenario – I didn’t say me!’ he adds hastily, when Liam opens his mouth to protest. ‘The point is… there’s always going to be a risk, on both sides. You’re going to try your hardest not to hurt him, and he’s going to do the same, if he’s worth it.’ He levers himself up, resting his elbows on the bedspread. ‘Just talk to him, dude. Ask him on a date, or something, and then talk.’
Just talk to him. Easy for you to say, Mason, Liam thinks sullenly, and scrubs hard at a stubborn bit of pasta sauce at the bottom of the pot. He glances sideways, for the nth time, just in time to catch Theo’s own subtle glance over the top of the baking sheet he’s drying. Theo, being Theo, immediately slides his eyes away and smooths out his face, pretending he hadn’t just been caught.
Liam sighs. Just talk to him. ‘So,’ he blurts. 'Do you wanna – you got plans this afternoon?'
Theo goes very still, still holding the baking sheet up like a shield. His eyes go a little wider than usual, and Liam can hear the small clicking sound in his throat as he swallows. After a moment he carefully resumes swiping at the tray. 'No plans,' he says, cautiously. 'Why?'
God, he really doesn't make it easy, Liam thinks, exasperated. 'I just thought. You wanna like – go out? Somewhere? Together?' His face flames immediately after he finishes saying it, but he goes on stubbornly watching Theo. He's come this far, he can't give up now – and after all, it's just Theo, Theo who teases Liam constantly about his long hair, who loves pesto pasta and mangoes and hates banana smoothies with a burning passion. Theo, who Liam's played Minecraft with for hours, both of them sprawled and laughing on the couch, and who Liam has spent the past six months getting to know better than he ever had before. They can get past this weird awkward stage, Liam is absolutely sure of it.
It helps that Theo looks nearly as flustered as he does – at least, when you know the signs to look for. His face doesn't change that much, but the tips of his ears flush pink and his eyes dip quickly away from Liam's before dragging back up again. 'Yeah. Okay,' he says quietly, and there's a helpless little curl at the corners of his mouth.
Liam wants to cheer. 'Okay. Good, that's good,' he says, stupidly, and grins back down at his pot.
They end up hanging out at the mall, in the end, because Liam wisely decides that less is more on a first date, anyway. Theo’s wearing a soft white henley and his hair looks clean and soft, falling on his forehead, and Liam is honestly having a hard time keeping his eyes off him.
Their fingers bump softly together at their sides as they walk, and he thinks about taking Theo's hand again, but in the end he's just too chicken, again. Maybe later, he thinks hopefully, when they go see a movie and the darkened cinema can hide his hot cheeks.
They just hang out for a while, meandering from shop to shop until the awkwardness fades and it's just them, laughing at the stupid heart-shaped sunglasses Liam tries on. 'You look like one of those stupid llamas,' Theo tells him, shaking his head at him and grinning. He gestures at the rack of kitschy animal mugs behind them, and Liam beams back, pushing the sunglasses up onto the top of his head.
‘I bet my mom would think I was cute on the side of a mug, too,’ he says.
They're standing very close together, he realises a moment later, crowded into the little aisle at the back of the store. Theo's face is only a few inches away and he looks soft and happy, his eyes crinkled up into amused crescents, and Liam just stares at him dumbly for a moment, feeling breathless.
Theo's eyes widen when he notices Liam staring, and he goes very still, his throat jerking as he swallows. They watch at each other for a long, shivery breath before they're interrupted by a polite cough, making them both jump. 'Sorry, loves,' the older woman behind Theo says apologetically. 'Just going to squeeze right past here and then you two can go back to doing... what you were doing.'
'Sorry, ma'am, excuse us,' Theo says, pink-cheeked and polite, and tugs Liam back against the overstocked shelves until there's room for her to pass.
Liam shoves his fist over his mouth to muffle a slightly breathless giggle, tugging the heart shaped sunglasses off his head and putting them back on the rack. He knows if he meets Theo's eyes it’ll be over, but he does it anyway, and they both lose it. 'Oh my god,' Liam says between muffled cackles, and puts his hand on Theo's back, pushing him ahead of him down the tiny aisle until they emerge back into the mall.
'I can't take you anywhere,' Theo hisses at him, and Liam gives an undignified honk of laughter that draws the stares of at least five other shoppers. He feels warm and light and excited, almost drunk on the happiness dancing in Theo's eyes, and he bumps their shoulders companionably together.
'C'mon. Let's try this one,' he says, and Theo shrugs contentedly and follows him into the next store.
If the previous store had been sunglasses central, the next one, as it turns out, is hat heaven. There's four whole racks of hats there, from cowboy hats to silly little fedoras to a section devoted entirely to stretchy knitted beanies in all shades of the rainbow. It's the last rack that Liam homes in on, spying the perfect thing.
'Hey,' he says hopefully. 'Theo. Would you wear this?'
Theo turns around from his careful inspection of one of the cowboy hats, his eyes fixing on what Liam's holding up: a pale pink beanie in a soft, silky knit. His eyes dart up to Liam's face, uncertainty creeping back into his scent, but Liam meets his eyes, lets him see the absence of mockery there. ‘Maybe,’ Theo says, cautious.
Liam grins at him. ‘Maybe means “Yes” if I get it for you, right?’ he says, pleased and a little daring. ‘Here. Come on, try it.’ He tugs the cowboy hat out of Theo’s hands and plonks it back on the rack, then reaches up to slot the beanie over Theo’s hair. Theo’s eyes are wide again, hazel-green-blue-grey. So pretty, Liam thinks, and watches as Theo just barely sucks his lower lip in under his teeth.
His own heart skipping and thudding audibly, he adjusts the beanie on Theo’s head, pushing it back so it hangs a little off the back of his head, a chunk of Theo’s hair falling on his forehead at the front. Theo seems to be barely breathing. ‘There,’ Liam says softly, when it’s arranged to his satisfaction, and nudges Theo round until he can see his reflection in the handy little mirror on the stand.
Theo stares at his reflection, then glances back at Liam, oddly shy. He looks adorable. ‘Good, right?’ Liam says, lifting up a little on his toes so he can look over Theo’s shoulder. ‘It suits you.’
‘Sure, if you say so,’ Theo says quietly, but he doesn’t sound as though he means it as more than a half-hearted protest. He looks back at the mirror and adjusts the beanie so it sits just so, and Liam grins and, daringly, drops his chin down so it rests, just for an instant, on Theo’s shoulder.
‘Okay, then,’ he says. ‘One pink beanie, coming right up.’
‘Pretzels,’ Theo observes when they come out of the hat shop, and Liam’s eyes light up.
‘Yes,’ he says enthusiastically, following Theo’s gaze over to the little stall in the middle of the walkway. They smell incredible. ‘Come on! What do you want?’
‘Salted. With parmesan and garlic butter,’ Theo says immediately, eyes fixed hungrily on the rows of golden pretzels, and then looks instantly horrified at himself. ‘I can get it. I’ll get my own.’
‘No, I’m paying,’ Liam says stubbornly, and then, high on the successes of the past half hour: ‘that’s how a date works, after all.’
When he chances a glance back to check Theo’s reaction, he’s a little worried Theo might be actually broken, because he’s standing stock still in the middle of the aisle with his cheeks nearly the same soft colour as the beanie on his head. His eyes are shining.
‘Breathe, dude,’ Liam tells him, and then gets embarrassed at himself, because oh my god, Liam. ‘I’m gonna go. Get our pretzels,’ he blurts, and rushes off to give them both a chance to recover.
They end up getting tickets for the Winter Soldier again, even though they’ve both already seen it, because it had been pretty good and nothing else on the billboards appeals to them. Theo ducks away to the other counter while Liam's paying for the tickets, and returns, carefully blank-faced but carrying a massive tub of popcorn.
‘Dude!’ Liam says, delighted but protesting. ‘You should’ve let me pay! It’s my date!’
‘It’s my date, too,’ Theo says, sending Liam a fleeting little glance before his eyes skate away. He clutches the popcorn to his chest, cheeks pink. ‘Maybe I want to pay for something as well.’
‘You got my favourite, too,’ Liam says happily, dipping his hand in to nick some of the sweet and salty popcorn when Theo holds it out to him. He nudges Theo’s shoulder with his own as they sidestep into their row and sink down into the seats. ‘If you want to pay, you need to pick where we go next.’ His heart thuds hard, immediately after he says it, which would be embarrassing if he couldn’t also hear Theo’s own heart suddenly racing like he’s running for his life. He does his little Theo routine immediately afterwards, of course, forcing his heartrate back into steadiness, and Liam snorts under his breath, rolling his eyes a little. Honestly.
‘Shut up,’ Theo mutters, but when Liam looks at him sideways, he has a helpless little grin playing around his mouth. ‘Maybe a restaurant,’ he says quietly, his eyes sliding subtly back to Liam’s face as though he wants to gauge his reaction.
‘Sweet,’ Liam says, watching Theo’s eyelashes and thinking about how pretty he looks. ‘We can dress up all fancy. Get you a suit.’
Theo’s eyes narrow a little. ‘I’m not wearing a pink suit, okay,’ he says firmly. ‘There’s a limit, Liam.’
‘Fine, okay,’ Liam says, ‘but a pink shirt, maybe? Or a pink flower in your buttonhole.’
‘Might be a bit overdressed for McDonalds,’ Theo says sadly, and Liam snickers, playfully bumping their arms together.
‘You’re such a cheap date,’ he says. ‘I’m worth Taco Bell at least.’
‘Maybe Subway,’ Theo says, considering. He’s meeting Liam’s eyes properly now, and they just smile at each other stupidly for a moment before the lights dim and the previews start to roll.
Right, Liam thinks, once the movie starts. Time for stage two of the plan – or is it stage three? It doesn’t matter, anyway, because it’s time to replicate the results from last time. He glances at Theo, gnawing his lip, his eyes darting down to where Theo’s hand is laying loosely in his lap. Not that close, but not that far away, either.
Liam takes a deep breath, rests his hand on the armrest, palm up, and lets his upper arm bump softly against Theo’s. He can feel the little shiver that passes through Theo’s body, but he leaves his arm there, connected and steady, his palm open and inviting. Shit, he’s going to feel so stupid if Theo leaves him hanging.
Theo’s heart is pounding so fast and loud that Liam doesn’t know how the rest of the cinema can’t hear it, too, human or not. Come on, he thinks. Just come here. He can almost smell Theo screwing up his nerve, and then Theo’s hand comes up to lay on the armrest, too. The backs of his fingers bump, light and shaky, against Liam’s.
Yes. Liam beams at the screen. He doesn’t give Theo time to regret reaching out, just slides his hand up and over Theo’s to cover it and thread their fingers firmly together, giving them a little squeeze.
Perfect, he thinks, and from the sweet, gratified edge that creeps into Theo’s scent as he exhales, maybe he thinks so too.
They’re still holding hands when the credits start rolling and it’s just – it’s the best. Liam’s pretty sure Theo is leaning a little bit onto his shoulder, and he smells so happy. Content. They stay there until the post-credits scene plays out, and Liam catches the tiny glance Theo darts in his direction, but he doesn’t make any move to reclaim his hand. Liam squeezes it again. ‘Hey, we could get churros,’ he says. It’s going to be dark out soon, but he’s not ready for the date to be over.
They don’t let go of each other’s hands until they absolutely have to, either, to hold the boxes of churros they’d managed to buy ten minutes before the stall closed. Not even when they’d edged out of the cinema seats, even when they’d emerged into the brightly lit foyer and Theo’s shoulders had gone a little tense, his gaze darting around at the other patrons nearest them as though he’d been expecting some kind of punishment. His hand hadn’t even tried to slide out of Liam’s though, Liam thinks, feeling soft and warm and fuzzy inside. If anything, Theo’s grip had tightened.
They find a quiet spot to eat their churros, perched on the set of granite steps that lead down from the cinema, out of the way of the shoppers slowly draining out of the mall. Liam glances up at Theo – perched a couple of steps above him, but close, his knee nearly brushing Liam’s arm – and catches Theo watching him out of the corners of his eyes. He’s still wearing the beanie, pulled down now over his ears against the light spring chill in the air.
‘This was okay, right?’ Liam says, hesitant. ‘The movie and… everything?’
He searches Theo’s face, relieved when Theo smiles, softly, down at his lap. ‘It was great,’ he says quietly. ‘Thanks.’
Liam smiles stupidly, buzzing. ‘Cool, okay, that’s cool,’ he says, and shifts a little, sideways, till his arm is resting lightly against Theo’s knee. ‘Thanks for coming with me.’
‘You – want to go to a restaurant next time, then?’ Theo says hesitantly, his heart suddenly racing. Wary nervousness edges into his scent, his body going very slightly tense, as though he’s bracing himself for rejection but doesn’t want to be too obvious about it.
‘Mmhm,’ Liam tells him, and leans a little more against Theo’s leg, reassuring. ‘And I can get you in a pink shirt,’ he adds, twisting his head around to grin back up at Theo.
Theo’s eyes crinkle up, the nervous tension draining away. ‘Fine. I’ll wear a pink shirt.’ He shakes his head, grinning helplessly. ‘What is it with you and the pink thing, anyway?’
‘I just like it,’ Liam says, crunching the end of his last churro and crumpling the napkin. Theo’s leg is warm against his shoulder and Liam brings his hand up, traces a little pattern on Theo’s knee through the denim, feeling Theo shiver. ‘It looks nice on you.’
Theo clears his throat; when Liam glances sideways, he sees that Theo’s own napkin is folded into a tight little series of pleats, and he’s messing with it with his fingers. ‘Yeah?’ he says, diffident. His cheeks are flushed again.
‘Yeah,’ Liam says firmly. He runs his thumb one more time across Theo’s knee and then flips his hand around, offers it to Theo. ‘Come on.’
‘Okay,’ Theo murmurs, and Liam beams at him when Theo takes his hand. He’d barely even hesitated this time. It’s progress, as Theo would say.
‘Let’s go,’ he says, and tugs Theo down the steps.