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Recovery

Summary:

No one's really been okay since the invasion ended. Artemis is back on the Team and back to school in Central City, M'gann and Connor are helping the Team stay afloat, Roy's quit the business to take care of Lian, and Dick has retreated back to Blüdhaven.

With all this, everyone can't help but notice how Kaldur's reacting to the last year of trauma, and to it finally being over.

Or, in better words, how he's not reacting.

(This is a story told through communications logs, security camera transcripts, and letters home that were never sent. It is a story about recovery and redemption, about heroes and what it really means to have sacrificed everything to save the world.)

(A/N: Updated to fix all broken links)

Notes:

The formatting for this story is going to a be a little bit unusual. It's partly going to be told in the style of the first chapter (aka chatlogs), partially in letters (some of which will be dated prior to the story's start), and partially in other formats. My hope is that a clear story will come across through multiple formats, but please feel free to send me any criticism or suggestions you have regarding my method for telling the story.

This is dedicated, in part, to Shade's Ninde, who has long wanted a detailed story about Kaldur's recovery post-Invasion. The story is about the rest of the team as well, but it's mostly about him. I'm not happy with how they ended his, or really anyone's, story arch in Endgame. So this is my fix-it.

Rating, by the way, is subject to change.

Chapter 1: LEAGUE CENTRAL COMMUNICATIONS LOG: DATE: 08/03/16

Chapter Text

  • CENTRAL COMMUNICATIONS AND TRANSPORT LOG: THE TOWER: 08/03/16
  • SORT BY: Time
  • SORT BY: ASCENDING
  • MESS. [0834]
    • SENT: Black Canary
    • RECEIVED:  Aquaman
    • SUBJ: Dammit Orin
      • REP: Aquaman
        • We have already discussed this at length, Dinah.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • You have to be able to do something Orin.
      • REP: Aquaman
        • As I have informed you in previous conversations, the decision is not mine alone to make.
        • Atlantis is a constitutional monarchy.
        • In cases like this, especially when they have proof of my bias, I must bow to the council.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Can’t you convince them? After everything he’s done, he doesn’t deserve this.
      • REP: Aquaman
        • “Everything he’s done” is the problem. It took considerable effort to convince them not to arrest him and have him put to trial.
        • I understand his reasons, Dinah.
        • I cannot say I would have done differently in his circumstances.
        • But my people suffered too many losses from his actions, and if there is one thing we cannot tolerate in Atlantis it is more traitors.
        • Nor so soon after the failed Purist coup.
        • When they see him they see my brother all over again, Dinah.
        • You have no idea what the last two years have done to us as a nation.
        • I can’t ask them to forgive him.
        • Not yet. They need time.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • You told me once he was like a son to you.
        • That boy needs to see his family again.
        • He needs to go home.
      • REP: Aquaman
        • That boy is a man who has seen and done more than any of us had done at his age. He knew what he was getting into when he and Nightwing made their plan.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Do you even care?
      • REP: Aquaman
        • Dinah Lance of Star City, do not dare.
        • When Kaldur’ahm of Shayeris infiltrated the Light and brought down both them and the Reach,
        • The world gained one of the greatest heroes it has ever known,
        • And I lost a son.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Yet you stand by and do nothing to help him.
        • What a father.
      • REP: Aquaman
        • They wanted his head, Dinah.
        • Allowing him back to Atlantis, even with the council's permission
        • Would be a death sentence.
        • He needs to stay on land where it’s safe.
        • Garth and La’gann have already begun a campaign to reinstate Kaldur’ahm’s good name.
        • They have lost many friends because of it,
        • And I have been petitioned frequently to withdraw my support from their efforts.
        • We are doing what we can.
        • But I am king first and a mentor second.
        • Trust me when I say Kaldur’ahm understands.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Fine.
        • I understand. I do, trust me.
        • It’s just
        • I don’t know what to do.
        • I’ve got ideas, but I had to try one more time. I’m going to keep in contact with you about his condition. I may be calling in for favors.
      • REP: Aquaman
        • Dinah?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Yes?
      • REP: Aquaman
        • Thank-you. For looking after him. I am in your debt.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • No you’re not.
        • After all the time he’s been with the team rather than being your side-kick?
        • He’s as much mine as he is yours.
      • REP: Aquaman
        • Even so, I must thank-you for doing your duty by him where as I cannot.
        • Please keep me informed.
        • I fear he is not honest with me when I contact him to inquire about his condition.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Orin,
        • I don’t think he’s honest with anyone anymore.
  • MESS. [0920]
    • SENT: Black Canary
    • RECEIVED:  Miss Martian
    • SUBJ: Return to Atlantis is a No-Go.
      • REP: Miss Martian
        • You weren’t able to convince him?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Aquaman’s not the problem. The people of Atlantis haven’t forgiven Kaldur for Poseidonis.
      • REP: Miss Martian
        • Don’t they know he was undercover?
        • That if he hadn’t done anything we’d all be dead? Or slaves?
        • Doesn’t that mean anything?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • King Orin made a good point to me, M’gann.
        • Landdwellers have no idea how much Atlantis has been put through in the last two years.
        • It’s understandable that they aren’t willing to let go only a few weeks after finding out the truth.
        • Have you considered my alternate proposal?
      • REP: Miss Martian
        • Well,
        • Yes.
        • But I’m not sure about it.
        • Not that I wouldn’t be glad to do it!
        • I just don’t know if it would help him.
        • He’s been isolated from everything for so long.
        • Are you sure this would be good for him?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Honestly?
        • No.
        • I’m not sure.
        • There’s a reason it’s not my only plan. But I need to know that the option is available moving forward.
        • So, if he agrees,
        • Are you willing to help me?
      • REP: Miss Martian
        • Of course I am.
        • After everything…
        • It’s the least I can do.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • What happened wasn’t all your fault, M’gann. I’m sure Kaldur’s told you that himself many times already.
      • REP: Miss Martian
        • I-
        • I actually wasn’t talking about that.
        • I do still feel guilty about it, but I was more referring to the fact that he’s always been there for me when I needed him.
        • I’m just glad to finally be able to return the favor.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Oh. I’m sorry for making assumptions.
      • REP: Miss Martian
        • It’s fine. Keep me updated about the plan, okay?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Yes.
        • Do you know where his is right now?
      • REP: Miss Martian
        • In the pool, training with La’gann.
        • They’ve been trying to catch him up on sorcery since he got back.
        • It really helps them bond,
        • But I’m not sure if it’s working.
        • The sorcery, I mean.
        • The bonding is going great!
        • I think they’re both really glad to have another Atlantean around that they can spend time with.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Okay. I’ve got some other things to iron out, but I’ll update you as soon as I can.
        • Take care, M’gann.
  • MESS. [0930]
    • SENT: Black Canary
    • RECEIVED:  Nightwing
    • SUBJ: We need to talk
      • REP: Nightwing
        • Hey B.C.
        • What’s up?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • How are you doing, Dick?
      • REP: Nightwing
        • Frankly?
        • Not well.
        • Artemis has been bothering me to come see her in Central City,
        • But.
        • I don’t think I can go there just yet.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Losing Wally has been hard on all of us,
        • But most especially you two.
        • You may find that you heal better if you have someone to share the pain with.
        • And I’m sure Artemis wants the company as well.
      • REP: Nightwing
        • Look
        • I really don’t want to talk about this,
        • I appreciate your help BC,
        • But I need to work this out for myself.
        • He was my best friend.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • I understand.
        • And I’ll try to leave you alone for a while.
        • But, Dick.
        • Don’t forget about the friends you have left, okay?
      • REP: Nightwing
        • Look, I’ll call Artemis.
        • I can’t go to Central City.
        • I can’t. But I can meet her somewhere else.
        • Have a good day Dinah.
        • Talk to you later.
  • MESS. [0932]
    • SENT: Red Arrow
    • RECEIVED:  Artemis
    • SUBJ: Hey Undead Sister In-Law
      • REP: Artemis
        • Please don’t call me that.
        • It is still so, so weird that you two got married.
      • REP: Red Arrow
        • Little sisters who fake their deaths can’t say shit about weird and uncomfortable family situations.
        • So shut it, blondie.
        • How are you?
      • REP: Artemis
        • I’d be doing better,
        • If a certain bird-brain wasn’t avoiding me like I was the fucking plague.
        • You’d think he’d want to at least talk after everything that happened with the Reach and Wally,
        • But no.
        • Bird boy just wants to mope and beat people up in Blüdhaven.
      • REP: Red Arrow
        • Dick can be a bit of a
        • And fuck you for making me say this,
        • A dick.
        • This is a known thing.
        • This is a thing that we have known.
      • REP: Artemis
        • I know I know.
        • It’s just,
        • He really pisses me off sometimes.
        • It’s like he hasn’t even considered that I-
        • Wait.
        • I’m getting an incoming message from him right now.
        • I’ll get back to you in a bit.
      • REP: Red Arrow
        • Sure, yeah, don’t mind me.
        • I didn’t need to talk to you about anything important or anything.
        • Brat.
  • MESS. [0935]
    • SENT: Nightwing
    • RECEIVED:  Artemis
    • SUBJ: Hey. Sorry for being an ass.
      • REP: Artemis
        • You’re entirely not forgiven,
        • Unless you’re also texting me with a date and time for when we can get together to beat people up and talk about our feelings.
      • REP: Nightwing
        • How does Star City sound,
        • Around 2200 tonight?
        • I know I’ve been avoiding coming to see you,
        • But it’s not you.
        • I just.
        • I can’t be in Central City right now.
        • I don’t know how to be there without him.
      • REP: Artemis
        • And I do?
        • I’m as much Gotham as you are, Grayson.
        • But his parents need someone around who knows who he was,
        • Not just as Wally, but as KF too.
        • And seeing Bart and Barry just reminds them too much of why and how they lost him.
        • I can’t take you up on your offer.
        • But,
        • Star City sounds good.
        • I’d suggest Gotham.
        • But I know that’s not the best place for you right now.
        • Did you already clear it with GA?
      • REP: Nightwing
        • No, but he’s nowhere near as protective over his territory as Batman.
        • So I’m not worried about it.
        • I’ll message him after we’re done.
        • So I’ll see you tonight, right?
      • REP: Artemis
        • Yeah.
        • But, Dick?
        • Can this not be a thing we only do every few weeks?
        • And could we just go for, I’d don’t know, a movie or something next time?
        • Losing Wally’s been as hard on me as it has on you.
        • And
        • And just because he’s gone,
        • It doesn’t mean we stopped being friends, okay?
        • I don’t want to lose you too.
        • I don’t know if I can take that.
      • REP: Nightwing
        • Got it.
        • I’ll see you tonight Artie.
        • And I’ll try to do better.
        • I don’t want to lose you either.
  • MESS. [0943]
    • SENT: Artemis
    • RECEIVED:  Red Arrow
    • SUBJ: Did you ask BC to talk to Dick?
      • REP: Red Arrow
        • No.
        • But I’m not surprised she’s meddling.
        • It’s kinda her thing.
      • REP: Artemis
        • I’ll have to send her a thank-you gift.
        • Or a hug or something.
        • Anyways, you said there was something you needed to talk about.
        • Why do I feel like I already know what it is?
      • REP: Red Arrow
        • Because you’re as worried about him as I am?
        • And slightly more empathetically sensitive?
        • And spent about a month undercover with the guy?
      • REP: Artemis
        • Yeah.
        • So, how is he today?
        • If you’ve talked to him at all.
        • I know you’ve seen him even less than I have,
        • With you being busy with Lian,
        • And him being holed up in the Tower.
        • I tried to talk to him yesterday but the conversations was
        • Short.
      • REP: Red Arrow
        • You tried to talk to him about Atlantis, didn’t you?
      • REP: Artemis
        • Yeah
        • How’d you guess?
      • REP: Red Arrow
        • M’gann told me he spent the rest of the day after you called practicing sorcery with Lagoon Boy.
        • After Lagoon Boy got tired and gave up for the night,
        • Kaldur apparently kept going.
        • M’gann found him passed out in the pool this morning.
        • He’d decimated all the targets he and La’gann use for combat practice.
      • REP: Artemis
        • Seriously?
        • All of them?
        • Don’t they have, like, 40 in stock? Made entirely of solid rock?
      • REP: Red Arrow
        • Not sure on the number, but yeah.
        • Solid rock.
        • M’gann said it looked like a bomb had gone off.
        • And that most of them didn’t look like they’d been broken with sorcery.
      • REP: Artemis
        • He’s not taking things well, is he?
        • Ugh,
        • I just-
        • How can they do this to him?
      • REP: Red Arrow
        • Artemis,
        • We don’t know what all went down before you joined up with him.
        • It makes sense that they’re upset.
        • And I’m not too sure that this is all anger over being exiled.
        • This is Kaldur we’re talking about here.
      • REP: Artemis
        • I know. I know.
        • Have you gotten him to talk to you about at all?
        • Because I’ve had no luck on that front.
        • And I don’t think anyone has.
      • REP: Red Arrow
        •  No, he hasn’t talked to me.
      • REP: Artemis
        • Have you even tried to get him to open up?
        • You’re practically the only person he ever really talks to.
      • REP: Red Arrow
        • Talked to. Was.
        • Artemis,
        • Kaldur and I haven’t been that close in years.
        • The whole heart to heart thing?
        • Doesn’t really happen anymore.
        • I actually thought you’d have more luck.
        • You or Nightwing.
      • REP: Artemis
        • You’d think so, right?
        • Ugh.
        • I want to punch him in the face sometimes, he’s so bad at communicating.
      • REP: Red Arrow
        • Dick or Kaldur?
      • REP: Artemis
        • Both?
        • Okay, I’ve got to go.
        • Midterms to study for before I go gallivanting off for a night in Star City.
        • Would it be cool with you if I stopped by to see Lian?
      • REP: Red Arrow
        • No tights.
      • REP: Artemis
        • Yeah yeah, I know the rules.
        • See you later Red.
      • REP: Red Arrow
        • You really need to stop calling me that.
  • MESS. [0947]
    • SENT: Nightwing
    • RECEIVED:  Black Canary
    • SUBJ: Happy?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • That depends.
        • What do I have to be happy about?
      • REP: Nightwing
        • Artemis and I are going to be patrolling in Star City tonight.
        • As a sort of bonding-over-Wally’s-death thing.
        • We’re starting patrol at 2200. Can you pass the message on to GA?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • I’m sure Ollie won’t really mind, considering he’s in Thailand this week.
        • I’m proud of you for reaching out to her,
        • Though I do wonder at the fact that you’re choosing a patrol as “bonding time”.
        • Do I need to send the message out to keep the streets clear?
      • REP: Nightwing
        • Anyone we come across will just be getting what’s coming to them
        • You and GA are too nice to your guys anyways.
        • I hear they hardly ever even bleed these days.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • After a while you lose a little bit of the blood lust that comes with crime fighting.
        • You learn to save if for the special cases.
      • REP: Nightwing
        • Like that guy you nabbed four months ago?
        • What was his name, the Star City Strangler?
        • Doesn’t he have permanent hearing damage now?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • We’re moving off topic.
        • I’m glad that you’ll be in town actually.
        • Would you consider dropping by for dinner before patrol?
        • Around 1800?
      • REP: Nightwing
        • Not so sure about that, BC. I’ve got a pretty busy night ahead of me…
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Ollie made dinner for a week before he left for Thailand.
        • I’ll just be re-heating it.
      • REP: Nightwing
        • Oh thank God.
        • In that case, sure!
        • See you at 1800.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • See you then, Dick.
        • (Brat.)
  • MESS. [1005]
    • SENT: Back Canary
    • RECEIVED:  Batgirl
    • SUBJ: Team Leadership
      • REP: Batgirl
        • I really feel like Dick should be the one talking to me about this.
        • No offence Black Canary,
        • But he does have the right to give leadership to the selection of his choice.
        • And he chose to give it to Aqualad and me jointly.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Dick hasn’t been thinking straight since Wally died, Batgirl.
        • And that’s understandable. But don’t tell me you don’t share my concerns about Kaldur.
      • REP: Batgirl
        • Look, it’s not that I don’t care about Aqualad,
        • But I’m not as familiar with him?
        • I always heard he was one of the more closed off members of the Team.
        • And he’s working through a lot right now with the whole exile thing.
        • He seems normal, given the circumstances,
        • And I don’t feel comfortable asking him to step down.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Please believe me when I say that Kaldur has not been behaving normally.
        • He’s always been reserved, but he’s never been this antisocial,
        • And I have other reasons to believe there’s something wrong that I’m not at liberty to discuss.
        • I’m actually going to be talking to him and Nightwing tonight.
        • If Kaldur agrees to step down, and Dick backs the decision to instate you as full commander of the Team,
        • Will you step up to the responsibility?
      • REP: Batgirl
        • Of course I will. It’s not that I’m unwilling to be the leader.
        • I’d actually really look forward to the experience!
        • I just don’t want to kick Kaldur out after he just got back. Seems like adding insult to injury after all that’s happened.
        • He’s a great leader, and he says he’s glad to be back on the Team.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • He is a great leader, and he’s proven that ten-fold over that last few months. I’ve heard nothing but good on him in that respect.
        • And I’m sure he is glad to be re-connecting with the Team and the League in general.
        • But I have reasons to push this, and I need you to trust me that this is for the best.
      • REP: Batgirl
        • If Kaldur agrees, I’ll take over as Team leader.
        • Keep me posted?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • You’ll be one of the first to know the decision once it’s reached.
        • Thank-you Barbara. I know this is a lot of responsibility to be handed when you're so young.
      • REP: Batgirl
        • I can handle it. And no problem.
  • MESS. [1030]
    • SENT: Black Canary
    • RECEIVED:  Aqualad
    • SUBJ: Appointment
      • REP: Aqualad
        • My apologies for missing our scheduled appointment last night.
        • I became distracted.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Kaldur, this is the fourth time you’ve missed our appointment.
        • League and Team members who undergo any mission lasting more than five days are required to attend a mandatory de-brief and psych eval within three days of the mission’s termination.
        • Extenuating circumstances could explain why you weren’t able to go through the full process immediately after your mission’s success,
        • But this is getting ridiculous.
      • REP: Aqualad
        • I have already been fully de-briefed by Batman. And psychological evaluations are only required if there is present evidence that trauma has taken place that will interfere with further operations.
        • Lacking that, League and Team members are at liberty to seek outside help so long as they do so within two months’ time of mission termination.
        • I trust my performance has not noticeably decreased since I resumed my duties as leader of the Team?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Your performance has been fine.
        • Exemplary, actually. You seem to have learned some new skills in your time away.
        • But I know for a fact that you haven’t had a psych eval yet, because you have yet to submit any of the confirmation paperwork to the League.
        • Not to mention that I’ve been your therapist since 2010.
        • The things you went through would be traumatic for anyone Kaldur. The fact that it’s not showing up in your performance doesn’t negate that you have a lot of experiences you need to work through.
        • I’m worried about you, Kaldur.
        • We all are.
        • Kaldur?
        • Are you still there?
      • REP: Aqualad
        • I understand your concern, and I do appreciate it.
        • When would you like to reschedule?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • I have some open time tonight, actually.
        • Nightwing and Artemis are doing a patrol in Star City, so I have the night off.
      • REP: Aqualad
        • When would you like to meet at the Tower?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • I was actually hoping we could meet at my house and talk over dinner,
        • If you’re comfortable with that arrangement.
      • REP: Aqualad
        • I am uncertain…
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Ollie left some food in my fridge that I’m planning on re-heating,
        • If that helps.
        • I won’t be the one cooking
      • REP: Aqualad
        • It is not my intention to offend, but that does make the decision considerably easier.
        • Are you still living in the same quarters?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Yes. Would you like to meet around 1800?
        REP: Aqualad
        • That would be excellent. Thank-you.
  • MESS. [1100]
    • SENT: Back Canary
    • RECEIVED:  Miss Martian
    • SUBJ: Dinner Tonight
      • REP: Miss Martain
        • Are you proposing the plan to Dick and Kaldur?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Yes. Dick and Artemis are going to be patrolling Star City tonight, so I thought I’d ask Dick to come for dinner.
        • I also asked Kaldur to come for his much belated appointment at the same time.
        • We should have a clearer picture of what the next few months are going to look like by tomorrow.
        • Have you talked to Superboy yet?
      • REP: Miss Martian
        • Yes. He’s not happy that I might be leaving, but he understands. He doesn’t show it very well, but he’s been really worried about Kaldur lately.
        • I’m pretty sure he’s actually really angry at Dick for putting Kaldur back in charge of the Team. He hasn’t spoken to him since the invasion ended.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Well hopefully that won’t be a problem anymore after tonight. I’ll get back to you with the plan after we’ve worked it out.
      • REP: Miss Martian
        • One last thing,
        • Does Kaldur know that Dick’s going to be there?
      • REP: Black Canary
        • I didn’t tell him, because I know it’s less likely he’d be willing to come if he knew. I’m banking on him forgiving me and being willing to listen anyways.
        • I may also be relying on him not having changed too much since he left, at least in this respect.
        • Hopefully he’s still too polite to leave.
        • I feel bad about manipulating them like this.
        • But this conversation needs to happen, whether or not they agree to our plan.
        • Have a good day M’gann.
      • REP: Miss Martian
        • You too.
      • REP: Black Canary
        • Oh, and can you do me one favor?
        • Make sure Kaldur doesn’t “fall asleep” in the pool again.
        • I would hate for him to accidently miss our appointment.
        • Again.
      • REP: Miss Martian
        • I’ll remind him.
        • ;D