Chapter Text
SPOILERS: “Zoo York” (2x3); “Snow Day” (3x24); “Child’s Play (4x11); “Right Next Door” (4x16); “Personal Foul” (4x19 in my story this is where they got back together, even though they don’t really show it in the series); “Boxed In” (5x9); “Green Piece” (5x17); “Greater Good” (5x23); “Pay Up” (5x25); “Epilogue” (6x1); “Dead Reckoning” (6x4); “Criminal Justice” (6x12); “Flag on Play” (6x13); and FINALLY! “Redemption” (6x19)!
Realization of Blessings
Danny stared out into the busy streets of New York. He stood, looking out of his living room apartment window he shared with Lindsay. He smiled at the thought of his wife, who was sleeping in the bedroom. He heard his daughter Lucy moving around in her crib before she settled deeper in sleep. His smile grew bigger and his heart felt like it was going to burst at the thought of his family.
Growing up, Danny had always thought he would be one of the guys without a family, even though he really wanted one. When he became an adult he pushed his longing aside and settled for causal relationships. He knew that someone accepting him and his complicated past was slim to none. He had causal relationships, none of the women slipped past the wall around his heart.
He stared unseeing at the busy New York night life as he thought of one of the women who had managed to slip by his wall. When she had showed up at the crime scene for the first time, he had been floored. He didn’t know what to feel. Anger for this person taking Aiden’s place, guilt for being so drawn with her, he didn’t know. He was unthinking, going back to the elementary mentality; he teased her, telling her that Mac was to be called ‘Sir’, knowing full well that Mac hated it.
He started to call her Montana, and tried to ignore the feelings that shot through him every time she shot him a small smile. He thought that if he could just have her for one night, then he will get enough, and he could go back to causal relationships. He couldn’t figure out why he was so drawn to her, she was nothing like his normal type. She represented everything he grew up telling himself he could never have. Somehow, though, she captured him and he got the chance to have that dream.
He remembered the day where he and Adam were held hostage by the Irish Mob. The night before him and Lindsay had gotten together. All during the waiting and the pain, he thought of Lindsay. The thought of them together kept him going. That and the thought it was supposed to be Lindsay here instead of him. He was glad she was spared, and flabbergasted that she apologized for it. She amazed him even then, Danny smiled at that thought.
Everything was going great, until tragedy struck. Danny allowed his eyes to tear up at the thought of Ruben. He loved that kid like he was his own. The memory of that day played across his mind. To the bike blessing, to the shooting, and then to when he found Ruben. Not used to having someone he could count on, he closed himself off to everyone. He still feels guilty to this day, but it wasn’t as bad as it once was. Ricki had came over one night, and one thing led to another. A simple thing of trying to comfort one another, led Danny to crossing a line.
Lindsay never was a stupid woman. She knew what had happened. Danny realized that he was in love with Lindsay when she had told him she wasn’t mad at him, but at herself for falling for him and has to figure out how to let it go. The thought of losing her, made him terrified. He realized that she had broken past his wall, and he was going to lose the best thing that ever happened to him. It took him three weeks for him to convince Lindsay to give him another chance. He didn’t tell her he loved her then, he feared that she wouldn’t take him serious and maybe thought he was just saying it to get her back.
Things were getting better, but it was still a little shaky. Danny worked a case that hit a little too close to home and when the victim’s parents asked him what was wrong, he unloaded on them. He opened up to complete strangers, surprising even himself. He told them everything, the cheating and now, that Lindsay was expecting. He was terrified. He was a screw up, what kind of father figure would he be? He let down Ricki and Ruben the other time he had tried. He knew that he would be in the child’s life, not letting them grow up without a father. He will try his best to be the best father there ever was.
Danny smiled as the next memory appeared across his mind. He had asked Lindsay to marry him and she said no, not wanting him to propose because of the baby. He finally told her that he really did love her, and set to prove that it wasn’t just because of the baby. He finally convinced her to marry him with Mac and Stella as witnesses. It was one of the best days of his life.
The other was when Lucy was born. Danny’s smile was full grown as he thought of his baby girl. His light in the darkness of times. He remembered being nervous, thinking he was going to be surprised with twins, and generally freaking out. He coached his wife, and tried his best to be there for her. He was so excited when his baby girl came into the world, his dream of having a family becoming real in front of his eyes.
Tragedy struck them again, when Angell died. He watched as his best friend, Flack lose the woman he loved. Danny held tight to Lindsay’s hand that night, thankful that he had another day with her and Lucy. The saying, “it gets worse before it gets better” played through his mind when the bar they were in celebrating Angell’s life was shot at. He remembered grabbing Lindsay trying to protect her; he never felt the bullet that entered his back, making him temporarily paralyzed. He was in that damned wheelchair for what seemed like forever. He was beginning to lose hope, till Lindsay came talked to him. The slightest chance is enough for her, because she believes. And because she believed, he believed.
Danny growled as he remembered the next memory, Shane Casey. Danny really did not like that man. He had gone to an acupuncture studio, where his dog tags and shield was stolen. He wondered why everything seemed to happen to him. Though he was feeling the sting of losing his grandfather’s tags, he told Lindsay, happy to finally realize to himself that he could trust her no matter what. When he and Flack went to the pawn shop, Danny spied his grandfather’s dog tags, finally telling Don that his badge was stolen. When he lifted off the prints, he never suspected to see Shane Casey’s name again.
Danny sighed and switched the weight from his left to right as he thought about what happened the other day. Sheldon had kept the fact he had a sister, not telling the team. Danny wasn’t mad, he really wasn’t. Maya and Louie had things in common, and now it seemed so did Sheldon and Danny. He felt like he had let his friend down, and he didn’t like it. He vowed to always be there, for the team, as they were there for them. Shane Casey was not going to get away with messing with his family, including the team as his family. Danny would make sure of it.
He turned his head when he heard footsteps come behind him. He smiled at the woman who had grounded him and gave him a reason to live.
“What are you doing up so late?” Lindsay asked as she hugged her husband, resting her head on his shoulder.
Danny smiled down at her as he answered, “I am just realizing all my blessings, and thanking to whoever blessed me with such beautiful blessings.”
Lindsay smiled as she met Danny’s eyes, adding her thanks to his, as they met for a slow kiss.