Chapter Text
Zacharias dropped his bags by the door with a heavy thud. Next to him, his father Peter sighed. His mustache bristled, and Zach knew it was hiding a frown. “We don’t have any house elves here. You’ll have to take your things to your room yourself.”
Zacharias rolled his eyes.
“Look, I know you wanted to be with your friends, but family comes first. And it’s just not safe now.”
His sister came bounding down the stairs. “Is that you, Zach?” she called.
“What are you doing home?” he asked sullenly.
She quirked her mouth at his less than warm greeting. “I took off from work when I heard the news. I thought maybe you’d need to be around family. Nice to see you too.”
He didn’t want to admit it, not in front of his father anyway, but he was comforted by her presence. It meant a lot to him that she’d be willing to miss work—she’d just landed her dream job at Gladrags—to see him in what she thought must be his time of need. So he just stood there like a statue while she threw her arms around him.
“I’ll always be there for you,” she whispered. He noticed then that her voice was raw like she had been crying.
“Thanks, Ruth. But I’d rather be at school.” He felt like a traitor, but he had to admit the truth. He needed to grieve with those who knew what he was feeling. Ruth could be sad now, when she was five years away from Hogwarts, but it wasn’t the same thing as knowing you’ll have to face it without Professor Dumbledore.
Ruth pulled back and sighed sympathetically. The hard set in her jaw reminded him that there was more to the story. As always. “Dad thought it would be better for you here. He knows you’re friends with that Potter boy. He didn’t want you to do anything...” she searched for the word. She finally settled on “imprudent” with a frown.
Zacharias rolled his eyes again. “It’s not like we stay up all night gossiping. We just had some classes together. He’s not even in my house.”
Family, house, wizard, country. The hierarchy rang in his mind unbidden. The list of people he must be loyal to in order. It still bothered him that his family needed him now. That they feared that by his presence at Hogwarts, he would betray them.
“He just thought it would be easier for you here.”
“I’m not going to say anything.”
Her mouth turned down like she didn’t believe him. “Even so.”
Still sullen, he carried his bag to his bedroom. Of course, it was painted in Hufflepuff colors, but in softer tones. A dark cream and charcoal. As though for a baby. His mother Annalise had known what house he’d be in when she had decorated his nursery. All Smiths were. It wasn’t anything genetic or a pureblood bias or even that they were descendants of Helga Hufflepuff herself, his mother had explained when an eleven-year old Zacharias had doubts before catching the train.
“Your father and I worked to instill the values of Hufflepuff in you since you were born,” she had said as they passed through the barrier to platform 9 3/4 for the first time together. “Loyalty. Fairness. Hard work. Family.”
“Family,” Zacharias thought as he lay on his bed. Yes, he loved his family, but never had the burden of family felt as great as it did then. All over a stupid cup.
Thinking about it made him angry. He ran back down the stairs and out the door, calling “I’m going for a walk,” as he went. He wanted to add “I’ll try not to let it slip out that our family provided the key to You Know Who’s immortality on the way” just to spite his father, but he knew better than to provoke a fight for no reason.
At the park he ran into Finley and Ben, two neighborhood kids that he had been friends with growing up. Before Hogwarts, the three of them were almost inseparable. The story they knew was that Zacharias went to some school in Austria, where his mother still has some family.
They looked surprised to see him. “Zach’s back!” Ben said. “I thought your mom told me your school doesn’t let out for another week. What’d you do, get kicked out?”
Zacharias ran his fingers through his hair uncomfortably. Living in a muggle neighborhood and having muggle friends meant he had to keep secrets at all times. He was used to that. He was a Smith after all. “Nah, there are some family things going on I have to be here for.” The answer was true enough.
A part of him—a foolish part that didn’t care about his family or even the International Statute of Wizarding Secrecy—wanted to tell Ben and Finley about his troubles. “My family brought me home early because they were afraid I’d tell Harry Potter that my family were the ones to give He Who Must Not Be Named the tools to immortality,” he’d say. “Telling Harry will help him defeat him, but it will incriminate our family.” He imagined their bewildered faces and frowned.
“You look like something’s bothering you,” Finley said. Zacharias didn’t know if it was concern in his voice or mere curiosity.
He sighed loudly. It would be impossible to tell his friends the truth of course, but maybe there was something close enough to the truth that he could share. He considered telling them that there was a family secret from a long time ago--something bad that they did--but any way he tried to word it would make them sound like they had been Nazis. “Just family stuff. I thought I could escape it at school, but here I am.”
Ben and Finley nodded like they understood.
“At least you get to get away for most of the year,” Ben said with envy in his voice. “I’d love to get away from my parents for even a week.”
“Your parents aren’t that bad,” Finley argued. “Your mom lets you pinch her cigarettes, and your dad’s got all those nudie magazines behind the bookshelf.”
Zacharias wished his problems were so simple that they could be solved by porn and cigarettes.
***
Back at home, Ruth was listening to the wireless and preparing dinner. “I made your favorite,” she said cheerfully as she stirred the curry.
He gave her a weak smile.
“You can talk to me, you know,” she said somewhat curtly. “I know you don’t want to be here, but you don’t have to go moping around.”
“How can you stand it?” All pretense of civility went out the window.
She narrowed her eyes. “Stand what?”
“Pretending there’s nothing wrong and making curry.”
She tried to speak calmly. “I know you’re upset about Professor Dumbledore.”
“I’m not talking about Dumbledore,” he nearly shouted. “I mean the cup! Not telling anyone when you know it could bring You Know Who down!”
“First of all, we don’t know that. We don’t know for certain that he even took the cup.”
“Oh, spare me the bullshit.” Zacharias knew the story: the young man from Borgin and Burkes came to look at Hepzibah’s artifacts. Two days later, give or take, she died. And a few days after that, her brother noticed certain items to be left to him in her will were gone. The young man was gone too. Oh, and that young man just happened to be the darkest of dark wizards. It was clear, to Zacharias at least, that he took it. “Why can’t we help?”
“You know why,” she whispered.
Family, house, wizard, country. The secret would destroy the family.