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When they were younger, Nishiki had always had somewhat of a crush on Kiryu. He had always loved him, of course he had, but there was a stint where Nishiki had wondered if the love he felt for Kiryu was more than just brotherly. Sure, they were young and dumb and usually full of too much alcohol, but as Nishiki began to figure out his sexuality, it only took so long for him to start realizing just how much Kiryu meant to him. Take that however you want, exact feelings were- and still continue to be- hard to place a name to. All Nishiki knew at the time was that he really liked Kiryu- adored him almost- and that Kiryu was the most important person to him. He couldn't see himself anywhere else than by his side. …so that had to mean love right?
As they grew older, Nishiki resigned his feelings for Kiryu and just chalked everything up to misplaced adoration, but of course he still held that love for Kiryu in his heart- whatever shape it may be.
The furthest Nishiki had gone had been kissing. The two had kissed approximately 1.5 times- back when Nishiki was certain that what he felt was none other than genuine romantic love. He was a chicken about it too of course- he never outright told Kiryu how he felt about him- at least not in its totality. Maybe somewhere out there there was another universe where Nishiki did, and maybe all of this would have done a complete 360, granting Nishiki the love of his life or something cheesy like that. But no, in this universe Nishiki was content to be by Kiryus side as whatever he could be to him.
They had kissed one drunken night in the midst of The Era of Nishikis Feelings. The fact that they had kissed was certainly something the both of them remembered, but, like the feelings Nishiki had put away on the shelf, the actual memory of it slowly grayed away now, just leaving the simple fact that it had happened.
Hell, Nishiki couldn't even remember the full lead-up to it now. It didn't help that they were so drunk during it as well. He just remembered that the conversation was related to it- were they talking about girls? Sexuality maybe? How neither of them had kissed anyone yet? He couldn't remember fully. What he did remember was tentatively (and most likely obviously) steering the conversation towards a kiss between them. Dancing around the notion that maybe, if Kiryu wanted to, they could kiss and, uh, you know, figure some stuff out. Looking back, Nishiki wasn't very proud of that moment.
Kiryu had ignored Nishikis flitting around the subject. Not out of malice mind you, moreso just because it all went straight over the blunt mans head- or at least that's what Nishiki hoped. It took Nishiki just plainly saying it out loud to even get anywhere. At his suggestion, Kiryu was quiet for a while, taking his time to absorb and formulate his thoughts as he so often did. Nishiki remembered those seconds being the most nerve racking seconds up to that point in his life. Then, it was all washed away as Kiryu just plainly answered with an ‘okay’.
What came next was still embarrassing to think about. He just remembered being so incredibly nervous. And awkward. And too excited to be able to play it off as something that he hadn't already invested thoughts into. Kiryu definitely wasn't going to make the first move, so, after a few moments of staring at each other awkwardly, Nishiki did.
As stated before, neither of them had kissed up until this point. But in the moment, god, it was the best- and most nerve wracking- thing Nishiki had ever gotten to do.
He couldn't remember the whole thing, hell he wasn't even sure he could remember all of it right after it happened, what with how much adrenaline was running thought him then. He could remember bits and pieces though.
He remembered being so excited that he forgot to close his eyes at first, leaning in and seeing Kiryu with his eyes scrunched shut like it was a rule of kissing. He remembered how Kiryus hand had tentatively came up to his face but forgoes actually touching it, unsure where to really go or where to draw the line at. He remembered how in his own head he was at first, completely absorbed in ‘Oh My God It's Happening’ to actually enjoy it.
He remembered finally, at the end, being able to let his eyes sink shut and enjoy the kiss properly. …… and with a bit of embarrassment he also remembered that the kiss went on longer than it probably should have.
Being able to look back on it, Nishiki knew now that that kiss must have been the worst kiss of either of their lives, but still, it was their first. That thought still made him chuckle a bit.
Feelings for Kiryu be as they may now, but the thought of their first kiss was still a fond memory for Nishiki, one that he enjoyed reminiscing over at the seat of a bar stool.