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Bass didn't know how he'd really came to be in such a position. Being in a lowly Navi's lap with their hand on his hips, their other hand on his stomach with the Navi's nose in the junction between his throat and his shoulder. He couldn't tell you why he was letting that red bastard with the horn on his stupid helmet press his chest into bass' back.
He could feel the pulsing and thrumming of proto's emblem against his back and it made him feel a certain type of way he already couldn't stand. A Navi's emblem was basically an equivalent to a humans heart in the way it held such importance - it held one's soul data, it held all the info - instructions of what went where. It held a Navi's sense of self.
So to have someone so close to what was their equivalent to a heart.. it was a trust fall at best. But in bass' condition? The first time he'd felt that he'd given one such access was also the first betrayal in his short life.
He'd been marred. Disfigured and stabbed, wrenched from the one life he had known because he'd been pinned for such crimes as losing important data and the corruption of important files he was in charge of.
All because since he was made to be operator-less, made to be his own self sufficient being.
All that had concluded with him being banished to the deepest pits of the under-net - his emblem, his identity broken into glass shards that took ages to put back together all by himself.
It was like he was letting himself fall from a burning building into another burning building.
So to have himself sat in the lap of a Navi who still had everything, who still had an intact identity and trust in an operator… it was disgustingly ironic.
To have his body react and thrum with a feelings he'd never remembered feeling before, to have his body want to arch into those hands and let his head fall back against proto's shoulder..
it made his nonexistent stomach churn with anxiety.
And yet he still couldn't bring himself to shove those hands away and start blasting at his 'enemy'.
He wanted to label the feeling he got in his gut from the way the red Navi's palm pressed lightly yet firmly into bass' stomach as something negative. As something that didn't at all give the sign that he wanted more of this.
"..I'm not a fucking dog." He grits through his teeth, emblem buzzing as he tried so hard not to give that red fuck any satisfaction.
"Never said you were." The other bluntly responded, sighing as he pushed his palm that was still shallowly dug into the solitary Navi's digital flesh upwards to where a diaphragm would be if a Navi were to had have one. The noise bass gave was akin to a grunt as protoman's other hand squeezed the flesh of bass' hip like a stress ball.
Then it went down to his thigh to fiddle with the small bit of flesh there too. Bass shook slightly but he would've loved if his body didn't react at all - especially because he swore he could hear a faint chuckle coming from the others throat.
The way his back slightly arched just enough to fully push against Porto's chest made the thrumming against his body get more apparent - which he took as a small victory in making the stoic fuck flustered too.
"You're breathing hard.." Was all protoman gave in observation before pressing his lips against bass' throat, giving a peck as the hand on bass' upper body moved up up up, bringing it closer to the golden frame of the solitary Navi's emblem.
It made bass shake even worse to have someone so close.. so very close to touching the scar that had been dealt to him ages ago. A wound that had been with him through his journey. He wanted to be shaking in anger, he wanted to desperately just be flooded with anger and rage and so many other horrific feelings…
He didn't want to be honest with himself. He didn't want to look at the truth of his feelings and he didn't want anyone else to do so either.
It felt so fucking good
He was so so scared
He wanted-no he needed to be touched even more-
"…don't think too much about it. You'll just work yourself into a fit."
Oh how bass wanted to rip and tear protoman to absolute shreds, leaving behind nothing but the memories in protomans dumb operators head at the way those words hit him.
He wanted to scream and shout and- and-
And..
. . .
He didn't know anymore. He didn't want to look at the truth of his own feelings and the way his body was reacting. He didn't want to beg
Touch me touch me touch me touch me
Kiss me, hold me, please, please tell me I belong to you
Please please please Please
. . .
"Just focus on me. It's better that way."
Oh, oh how bass just couldn't take it anymore.
He whips around and works his way out of the red Navi's hands just to go and smash his lips into the others stupid mouth. He shoves his tongue down protomans throat, he nips against protomans lips like a wild animal.
His hands finally had something to tangle fingers into, yanking and pulling the red Navi unbearably closer.
A small clack was heard as their emblems touched unceremoniously as bass tried to devour the other male whole. Eventually protoman's hand wraps around the back of bass' throat to pull him away just for a moment. Their foreheads touched after the kiss was broken.. both were panting as a string of spit and blood made up from the junk data that beaded up from proto's lip being bitten connected them to one another.
"Stupid..stupid, empty-headed bitch..!"
At that protoman just chuckled, blood smeared on his bottom lip and his teeth as he took the moment to rest.
"You look so stupid.."
"Mm? Stupid?"
"Absolutely..fucking imbecile.."
"..I think you're thinking too much again."
"WHAT-"
proto pushes against bass, pressing against the solitary Navi's body as his hands - one hand on the back of bass' neck and the other on the small of the others males back - pull him ever closer. Their emblems thrum against one another as proto pulls him in for another kiss.
Their emblems both pulse against each other, clacking and scraping just enough to make bass dizzy. Proto's thumb presses 'n rubs up the side of bass' throat; the pad of it pushing against bass' pulse as the red bastards tongue presses into his mouth - much the same as bass' had prior.
Navi's technically didn't even need to breath, but that didn't stop bass from feeling like he was being suffocated. He felt as if the other was trying to overwhelm and overpower him.. felt as if..
Another bite snapped him out of things, out of spiralling. He could feel his mouth gush with blood, liquid made of junk data and small bits of malware he'd absorbed during his time in the under net-
Suddenly he felt a hand on his ass that squeezed and massaged the digital flesh just like how his thigh had been messed with.
He could feel proto panting against him, he could feel with each movement he was being brought back from the brink of a breakdown.
It was all so sickening.. so.. so very disgusting..
the way the tastes of the others blood mixing with his own.. the way it was mixing at all..
So sickeningly sweet
It feels.. so… so satisfying…
Bass couldn't have proto having all the fun action. He started pushing right back against proto's advance - clawing at proto's back and digging into flesh so that proto's 'precious operator' would know what he'd been off doing.
He bites back, he even growls whilst wrestling proto down onto the floor. A victorious cry from the solitary Navi when he achieves pinning the other down before he starts attacking the sword man's throat.
He hears a grunt, then a whiny noise from protoman after pinning him down and mouthing against his neck.
He feels akin to a predator catching prey by the throat, elation of not being the vulnerable one anymore coursing through his body as he chomps down; his teeth digging in and tasting more blood. It tasted.. it tasted so different than the others he's had.
He didn't know exactly how to name the difference- but it was there, oh how prevalent it was.
He sucks a hickey into proto's throat and more whiny noises roll out of that usually stoic bastard. Grunting and groaning.. panting as bass sucks mark after mark into his neck.
Proto couldn't stop the noises, half of them pained as It ached. of course it ached, but god it felt.. it felt amazing too.. it was a rush to be wrestled to the ground, it was such a rush to be pushed down and.. and marked..
and if it got him closer to the other standoffish Navi..
he didn't quite mind being a 'chew toy' for a bit.
A tear is heard before the material of his bodysuit gives way and his throat gets hit with the warmth of bass' lips. Proto's cheeks burn pink as he grits his teeth - he know what's probably coming.
…..
It's been a few days. It's been a couple days since the incident.
Protoman didn't like lying to his operator. He didn't like keeping secrets… but was it really a lie when he told enzan that he 'got ambushed' by a rowdy virus?
…he was sure that bass was just one step away from being one, close enough to not arouse too much suspicion.. even if enzan had his conclusions, he hadn't said anything more than a 'be more careful, blues.' After fixing the scarring and marks..
Proto was sure nothing got through his internal firewall, he was sure that whatever leftover junk coding from bass was not too much of a worry. He was built for battle after all; if he couldn't handle such things, he wouldn't be the 'best'.
He wouldn't of gotten far at all as a swordsman, as lord Enzans Navi.
…at all.
That was besides the point though.
It had been some time since he'd saw 'him'. and he decided that since it would be a blue moon before he saw the other again on his own terms - he'd just go and find him himself.
So when he was finished tending to his lords needs, when he was sure that he wasn't needed for more important things.. he dipped below to where only bass could reside. perhaps bass wouldn't even be there, perhaps it was a fools errand. But he had to, he felt it in his core, in his approximation of bones.
They needed to talk.
Hours later
Bass felt it. The solitary Navi could feel the signature of something warm and alive in the undernet, could feel the digital thrumming of their coding move 'n run forth. Like the blinking on a radar, like the pulsing of a target before it got shot…
that's exactly what a lot of things were for him. Target practice. Things to kill and consume.. that's what he'd been condemned to do long ago.
Left to fester like a open wound..
"Bass!"
There it…he.. was…
A shiny beacon of unmarred flesh and stability.. complete, whole, like a buffet waiting to be consumed.
"Stop your yelling. You'll alert all the other monsters lurking in the shadows..worse than your shining armor already does."
"..you know that they wouldn't dare. You're here."
"And what's keeping me, hm?" Snickering comes from the solitary male at that response. "I could just leave you, let them all tear you open and tunnel through your insides."
The swordsman doesn't give a response to those words. Instead he goes right for the throat. "We're talking about that day."
"Which one? Whatever you're talking about-"
"You know which one. You're not that braindead and I know that."
Bass' eyes narrow, his mouth hidden behind the collar of his cloak. Red eyes meet shades and suddenly bass isn't talking.. suddenly bass feels a tightening in his throat…
"..there's nothing to talk about-"
"What about the biting. Let's start there."
"….I bit you cause you're annoying! Cause you piss me off so fucking much with your 'look how cool and mysterious I am! I don't feel anything!' Persona!"
"…."
"You shouldn't be so braindead as to not understand. Something as simple as.. as.."
"As?"
That has bass growling like a cornered animal. Has him gritting his teeth and clenching his hands into fists under his cloak.
He didn't want to say it out loud. So he kept quiet.
"People don't usually kiss their enemies." Proto remarks before bass can say anything more. "People don't shove their tongue down their enemies' throats.. don't let their enemies push their hands along their body and hold them close.."
"…."
"People-"
"Shut UP-!"
Bass yowls, much akin to a cat cornered. How dare this fucking.. this goddamn stoic 'I don't let emotions take over decision making so I'm better than you' bastard-!
And yet.. yet one little piece of bass whimpers. One small lil whimper exists in bass' body that wants to be held and touched like lovers do. But he doesn't want to want that!
He wants to claw up proto's body, bite him in half! Bring back his emblem to that dumb operator of his, hold it up like a hunting dog holds a duck, a show of how weak his dumb Navi was. See them writhe in agony-
. . . .
"Im not. Im not good.. at emotions either."
"What's that supposed to mean?!"
"It means you're not the only one with feelings like these without knowing how to deal with them."
Proto tried to be comforting. He tried to let bass know that he wasn't the only one going through such things.. much like megaman would do. Megaman was much better at emotions, at such fickle things as feelings because he'd been programmed with that in mind.
He was programmed to be a person first and foremost..
This wasn't even a dig at enzan, because enzan himself wasn't the most 'outgoing' or 'sociable' or 'extroverted' person either. Most days if it wasn't for having to go through business meetings and doing company chores, they would be alone with just one another for company.
Maybe that's also what brought him to be interested in someone like bass.
Bass' sighing snaps him out of his thoughts, his gaze flicking up behind his shades, makes him stand a bit straighter.
"…guess you're not that stupid either…" it pained bass to say that. It truly did make him cringe to have to give credit to the red bastard. But he couldn't stop the words coming from his mouth.
"So.. you do have them?"
"Mm..It's..something. "
"Ah..i see."
A moment of silence comes between them.
It's not truly comfortable, but it's not drowning. It's not the type that drags you down before you can get your words out, the kind that suffocates you into shutting up.
"So. About your emblem-"
It's a sound similar to a whip cracking that cuts through the air around them at that. Since proto has the knowledge that no other virus would dare interrupt bass during this talk.. he can only come to the conclusion it's the metaphorical sound of a bridge's suspension wires snapping - of it causing cars to sink into the water below.
In layman's terms - he was too heavy handed, too blunt with his questioning.
"I'm-"
"Shut the fuck up. Don't you dare say some stupid bullshit of how 'bad' you feel. Don't you dare feel pity for 'poor little me'"
". . ."
Proto had picked it up after rolling around the events that played out a couple days before this. He'd been quick enough and close enough to understand what he'd glimpsed over the solitary males shoulder.
Something had happened to bass' emblem. Some previous event had occurred that had marred the emblem that's so important to every single Navi.. it was akin to having the human heart disfigured.
But from what? He could only guess..only partially piece together possible events that could've happened in bass' past.
Under bass' tan cloak was a injury, one that even if it had healed way before proto had shown up it had certainly left its own scar on bass' mind.
Bass was defensive and standoffish all of the time anyways. But this? He could feel it. He could feel the way bass' gaze tore into him; wide eyes and slit pupils. He imagined that if Navi's had physical veins that bass' would be near popping.
". . . What Happened. I want… I want to understand. I can't understand if you don't tell me"
". . ."
"Bass."
"..you want to understand? A mindless, useless puppet on strings for a human to control.. wants to understand?"
". . . I know you understand what I mean."
"But could a mindless fool like you.. could you ever truly understand me? You who still lets a human 'operate' them?"
Proto's jaw clenched. He knew what was happening. Bass was hoping he'd get too annoyed and go back to his terminal with his tail between his legs.
". . .you're stalling for time. But it's not going to work."
"…?"
"How do you expect me to understand if you don't give me the chance to? Why do you stall for time, are you scared?"
"…!"
"Neither of us are good at emotions. But I want to understand. I want to learn about you, I want to-"
"SHUT UP-!"
". . ."
"Fine, fine! You want to understand so badly?!"
Bass darts forward, pushing his hand so it was palm against emblem. It was faster than proto's ability to dodge, the red Navi's emblem thumped heavy against bass' palm before things go black.
. . . .
. . . . . .
. . . . . . . . .
He wakes up after god knows how long, his senses finally coming back to him and he instantly realizes that he's surrounded.
He's surrounded by.. by..
megaman..?
searchman..?
it wasn't just them. There were other faceless Navi's.. the ones specifically meant to guard.. guard scilabs system..
He turns his head from side to side, moving around in a circle to try and count all of them.. but it's useless.
He thinks this must be an misunderstanding. It must be! They couldn't… they couldn't be trying to capture him..?
He hadn't done anything wrong! He.. he hadn't…
…had he?
No, no!
If he could just- if he could just get someone to explain-!
"Megaman..!"
"You already know what you've done.."
"..w..what? What..happened..? I dont.. I don't know-!"
Proto never been one for emotions. Had never felt too much of anything, not the the point of feeling like it would eat him alive at least.
That didn't mean he didn't feel anything.. it was easier to ignore for him.
But now - having woken up & surrounded by his own ally's, to see megamans face like that - he felt exposed and vulnerable. He felt like a caged animal. Like a criminal.
"The net police have labeled you a threat. After the deletion of civilian Navi's, the deletion of important info.. you have been deemed unfit as not only a net police agent. But also unfit for civilian release."
"What about enzan.. what about.. where is he? Does he know? Tell me! Tell me where enzan is!-"
"He knows of your crimes. You've disappointed so many.. and to think.. to think I was allied with such a cold hearted killer."
This has to be a nightmare. This has to be! He didn't, no he couldn't of..!
His body is shaking, he looks down at his own hands and they're trembling. He thinks for a moment he can see the blood on his own hands.
"I want.. I want to hear it from him.. I want.. let me see him.. let me see him!"
". . . The decision has already been made."
He can't control it. He can't stop the way the tears flow, the way his throat clenched up before he gave one last shout.
"ENZAAAAN-"
That's all thats able to be shouted before he's attacked. He tries so hard to fend them off, to get away and get to enzan.
He's never felt so suffocated in his life, never felt such stomach sinking fear before.
It's all a blur, every bit of it is akin to being torn open by a rabid pack of dogs.
Before he knows it, he's left a bruised scraped up mess.
But all he cares about in that instance..
all he wants most in the whole world..
The last thing he uttered before passing out after having crawled well enough away.. whilst dodging viruses..
was enzan.
The last thing he'd realized before passing out. The final blow to it all?
Was that he'd been slashed across his chest. By none other than his previous comrade, none other than megaman himself.
A shaky hand goes down to his emblem. With equally shaky fingertips he feels the scar against his hands, the new hot to the touch jagged Line…
he didn't need to see it. He didn't need to even use his eyes to know that his emblem had been damaged. The mark him and enzan shared.
It was gone, trashed.
Even when he'd been a darkloid, his emblem had been intact. It was something the darkloid him detested because it was his last connection to that damned human.
He felt bare, put right out in the open for anyone to take as prey. He had no one to go back to, he felt as if enzan wouldn't recognize him-
Then, right then as he was about to have a fit..
He heard the whipping of fabric against the digital wind, tanned fabric in the corner of his eye right before he was about to completely break.
Proto trembles as he moves his head up, from what he'd like to just write off as tiredness and not anything else. It's not half wrong with how his body is battered and bruised; scraped and scarred, on the brink of total breakdown.
"Time to wake up." The voice, a familiar one, speaks.
Just like that he's suddenly collapsed like a unstrung puppet. Everything goes black once again as a dull ache follows him right behind. Before he's fully out for the count he can swear there's a hand against his scuffed helmet - palm flat against the dirtied material.
. . .
. . . .
. . . . .
Proto wakes up on the ground of the undernet.
He's shaking, he's wide eyed and panicked as he recounts what had all happened before he 'passed out'.
His breath is quick. His emblem pulsing like a humans heart would with the onset of a panic attack.
Enzan.
Enzanenzanenzan- enzan-
He needs to go to enzan-
He's right about to jump up and go back before his gaze lands on bass who's sitting across from the red Navi. His legs are crossed, his gaze observant and cold.. scrutinizing.
Bass..?
Thats…That's right.
"your stupid operator is fine. You should be smart enough to understand what all that was."
Bass' eyes narrow as he gazed at protoman - the stoic, ever powerful swordsman - be on the verge of crying, of hyperventilating whilst clutching his chest.
"Wait..wait.. "
"What? Are you gonna go back to him? Was all that too much for you? .. be careful, you might not find your way back to me once you go back to your NetOp's home. You might just meet your end and it'll all be for nothing. "
It's a about 5 minutes before there's any response to bass' condescension. Neither of them talk in that time, bass doesn't even make a remark at the way proto curls into himself with his knee's against his chest for those couple of moments. His arms around his legs, his mouth against his knee's.
"..those..those were your memories.. weren't they?" Is all proto responds with, still curled up in himself but his eyes are glancing up at the other through his shades. It takes another minute before bass grumbles.
"Yes. More or less.. there were others, but the feelings are the same."
". . . It was a lot.. I.. it's suffocating.."
". . ."
"so those were your feelings..no wonder you're-"
"-Like this?"
All proto does is nod weakly. To be betrayed, to be backstabbed by your own comrades..
"You felt the sword pierce your chest didn't you? Felt as it's heated edge push down and break your emblem. Glowing, burning, a raging consuming force. Wanting to eat you whole for the crime of being alive." Bass' voice is solid, unwavering as his eyes stare right through protomans legs against his chest. Right to his core.
"Yes."
"You wouldn't want anyone to touch you after that, would you? Wouldn't want anyone near you, right?"
"…"
"I know you're stronger than this. Don't tell me I broke you?? After all this-"
"Then why.. why did you let me touch you?"
"What?"
"If this how you felt. Why did you let me put my hands on you? If it felt so bad?"
". . ."
"Is it.. is it because.. you're lonely too? You want to be held don't you. Even if you're so very scared.. there's still a part of you that wants to be touched gently-"
"You're a dumbass."
Proto didn't back down, even as he was still curled up, even as he still felt whiplash from the living through of bass' memory.
"I lived .. through your feelings.. you felt abandoned. To feel abandoned, means you were loved at one point. Means you loved someone at one point.. you wouldn't have such strong feelings otherwise.. I wouldn't have been made to feel abandoned by enzan if it weren't the case."
Proto knew he had a point, and he knew that bass deep down under all his ego and hatred had known it too.
"So who was your 'enzan'? Who was that important to you, at that time."
"..Cossack."
"The.. the dr Cossack?"
"Mm.. I truly thought he'd cared. He sure acted like it, no one else in the godforsaken scilab really liked me anyway. But… he had."
Bass' eyes look down at the ground, softening just the faintest bit. His lower face was hidden by the collar of his cloak; a bit muffled but nonetheless proto didn't mind.
"I wanted to be the best. I wanted so bad, so very bad to make everything better. All of it.. was to make the system just each bit more advanced. What a foolish idea I had.. but he never told me that. No. No he wasn't like everyone else."
"I see…"
"I Have no need for a operator like you do. But he.. he wasn't an operator.. he was.. he acted like my closest friend. He called me his son.."
"An operator can be a Navi's friend-"
"That's not the point-"
"I Hate how you do that, how you act like we're so different. I'd gone through something akin to what you'd gone through with dr.Cossack. I…"
The red swordsman goes quiet suddenly. He hugs his knees closer to himself, in this state he feels mentally weaker as he thinks back to how he felt during the dark chip situation. Bass, annoyed at the sudden quietness, goads him.
"Well?? Spit it out!"
"When that darkchip downloaded i swear I could feel straight fire running through my code, it felt like I was being torn open and rearranged, it felt like- like I became nothing but a damned virus! I wasn't me!"
Proto blurts out suddenly. He's panting, he's shaking.. but it just keeps pouring out of him.
"..I wasn't enzan's netnavi anymore, I wasn't anyone! I wasn't even myself! What I felt after- after they all attacked me in.. in whatever you showed me- I was taken right back to that moment!"
It keeps pouring. Like a busted pipe flooding a room with dirty water, it just kept gushing out. It was bordering on word vomit the way it came from his throat.
"I'd lost myself. I wasn't even powerful, if I had been powerful enough I could've- I could've stayed myself.. but for months, fucking months I was no one. I was nothing. I said things I didn't mean, did things I wouldn't of dreamt of doing in a million years-! It was so awful!"
Bass just stays still; listening to every word that comes from proto's mouth. This is the most emotional he'd seen the red fuck, right on the precipice of falling headfirst off a ravine. he should be happy, he should feel so fucking happy about this! About getting to see protoman fucking sob!
….
..yet he's not.
"..but.. I still had my emblem.. for all those months. All those months I'd hated it because it was the last remnant of enzan left on me. yet.. whilst reliving what you went through. It felt so much worse. It felt so much worse because when I finally felt around- When I finally felt the blazing burning scar with my weak hands.. I.. I felt like even if I'd made it back to him, enzan wouldn't recognize me. He wouldn't see me as his Navi.. not even a friend.. he'd see nothing-"
In the blink of an eye suddenly bass was beside him, in a flash bass' cloak was around the other males shoulders along with a arm against his back. Protoman flinches hard at the sudden contact - his body almost shooting up like a spring that'd been squished flat..
"Sniffle…b-bass..? Wha..sniffle..?"
"…."
There were so many thoughts, so many things racing through bass' skull and it annoyed him so much. He didn't know if either protomans pathetic sniffling irritated him more or if it was the thoughts and the feelings..
Why did he not find joy in this….
Because he felt the same pain before, and to someone to feel it too ..
To have someone actually understand…to see someone hurt.. just like him
"Don't… don't think too much about it." Is all bass says before he pushes proto down to where he has his head in the junction between bass' throat and his shoulder. The hand moves to his side so that bass' is holding him up by his arm wrapped around the back. They're about the same height either way so it's not too uncomfortable… even with the horn of proto's helmet, it's not impossible.
"Sniffle…o-okay.."
so many things bass wants to say. So many feelings.
I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for making you cry I didn't mean to push so hard
It's okay. It's all going to be okay.
Thank fuck someone finally understands
But they just stay there, silently huddled against one another as protoman sniffles quiet down.
Maybe it really isn't something to think too hard about. Not about something that feels nice, anyways.