Chapter Text
Sunlight slipped through a gap in the curtains, a thin beam cutting across a bedroom. Empty beer bottles littered the floor, with crumpled takeout bags and half-eaten food surrounding an unmade bed, atop which laid a Lopunny. The girl was snoring, half-wrapped in her blanket and drool oozed out onto her pillow.
Before long, a sound rang out from the smartphone beside her head, her ringtone playing at full volume as a call symbol flashed across the screen.
The rabbit jolted awake, her long ears twitching back at the incessant buzzing. As soon as she felt consciousness take hold, she instinctively let out a groan and pressed a hand to her head as a dull headache throbbed against her skull. Her fingers combed through her disheveled fur, before sluggishly forcing herself upright.
She rubbed at her eyes with one hand while reaching for the phone with the other. With a resigned sigh, she swiped to accept the call and lifted the device to her ear. “Yeah?”
“Penelope Hart!”
The Lopunny yanked the phone away with a grimace, the sheer volume of the voice making her headache flare. Groaning, she flopped back against her pillows. “Come on, Will, it's too early for this…”
“It’s well past noon, young lady,” the man shot back, “you’d know that had you not pulled another all-nighter.”
Penelope exhaled dramatically, grabbing a pillow and shoving it over her face, “I was busy!”
“No, you weren’t.”
The Lopunny scowled at his doubt, pouting as she rubbed her temples. “Yeah, well… I don’t know, what else was I gonna do?!”
“Sleep.”
She couldn’t help but scoff, “And what, walk around during the day?” She stood up, walking over to her curtains. “Bit of a reminder, William—”
“Don’t call me that.”
“Make me!” She spat…
Only to nearly curve over, catching herself on the edge of her bed as her legs gave out. She gave the wobbling, pathetic things a moment to stabilize, before throwing herself forward and latching onto her desk. She felt a bit of a bubbling in her gut, a shiver running down the length of her spine as she tried to keep whatever was coming back up down.
“Penelope?” The voice asked. Despite the stern tone, there was obvious worry in his voice as she heaved a breath.
“I-I’m fine!” She forced out, her voice hoarse.
She ran a hand across her face, and straightened her back. She was standing tall enough for the curtain’s light to cross her path, the shine hitting her eyes as she reflexively brought up a hand to block it. She stepped forward, ready to close them entirely…
Only for her eyes to catch the outside. She could see her front porch… and what was on it. Beyond the growing pile of forgotten newspapers, and the splattered eggs across the grass, laid hundreds of tossed CDS. And posters, and shirts, and more. Merchandise of all kinds, thrown into her yard like it were the dump. Which… well, considering the state it was in, maybe it was at this point.
“...Penny?”
The Lopunny breathed in, reaching out and closing the curtain. “At night, I can at least blend in, y’know?” She narrowed her eyes a bit as the natural light dispersed, eclipsing the room in darkness.
“Oh, Penny…”
She snorted, rolling her eyes as she walked back toward her bed. “Don’t wanna hear it, Will.”
“...Well… m-maybe you’ll want to hear that I’ve found work for you.”
Penelope’s expression didn’t budge much, pulling up a shirt as she grumbled, “Uh huh.” She sniffed it, her face twisting back as she gagged.
“I’m serious, Penelope! I found you a real job!”
The reaffirmation did bring a bit of a sparkle back to her eyes. She lowered the shirt, her ears perking as she whispered. “...You’re not joking?”
“I'm heading to your place now to explain. Please be decent.” And with a click, the line went dead.
It was about then that Penelope realized she had been staring at the wall for the last minute or so. She hadn’t even blinked, as if she had forgotten that she could. As soon as she snapped out of it, her eyes flicked to her phone, where she finally noticed the time; 3:12 PM.
With a yawn, she took a moment to stretch, before dragging herself into the bathroom. She flicked on the light, and blinked at her reflection. Even disheveled, she was striking; her plush brown fur and long, elegant ears framing a face that had once charmed millions. Her mesmerizing pink eyes, however, were dulled by exhaustion, and dark circles clung stubbornly beneath them.
…Nothing that a hot shower and some makeup couldn’t fix.
Penelope descended the staircase, her ears perking somewhat at the sound of knocking. As she passed through, it was hard not to notice the degree of lavishness the rest of her house had maintained in spite of her bedroom’s mess. It was hardly a mansion, but it was spacious, well-kept, and quite nice. It certainly looked like it cost a pretty penny.
Reaching the door, she threw it open to reveal a towering Cetitan in a well-tailored, black suit. “Penelope.”
She blinked… then deadpanned. “Will, why were you even waiting? You have a key to my house.”
He stared at her with a long, blank glare… before his body noticeably sagged, mumbling out, “I lost them…”
Penelope sighed, stepping aside. “Alright, come in.”
Will grunted, adjusting his tie as he stepped inside. Penelope rolled her eyes and shut the door behind him as he stepped into the living room. “Well, at least you haven't thrown a house party.”
“Kinda hard when everyone hates your guts,” she quipped bitterly, a dry laugh escaping her as she followed him toward the kitchen…
Only for her to scream at the sight of a Jumpluff standing by her stove. She hid behind Will, pointing and shrieking, “Who the Hell are you?!”
“Oh, you’re awake!” The grass-type chirped, before holding up a plate stacked high with pancakes. “Want some brunch?”
Will just stared dully at the man, piecing together why this boy was in the house… before his eyes snapped open as wide as can be. He slowly shifted a withering glare toward Penelope, his eyes noticeably twitching as Penelope weakly smiled at him, then at the Jumpluff.
“...Y-Yeah!” She babbled out, before asking, “Quuuuuuuuick question… we didn’t get married, right?”
The Jumpluff blinked in surprise. “Uh… no?”
Penelope heaved a sigh of relief. “Okay, cool…” She pointed toward the door. “Then leave.”
His eyes widened in offense, mouth opening to say something, but before he could utter a word, Will had already taken matters into his own hands. With a grunt of effort, the massive Cetitan grabbed the Jumpluff by his round, cottony body and hurled him straight out the open kitchen window. “AHHHHHH!”
“And don’t come back!” Will barked with terrifying authority, before slamming the window shut. He was visibly shaking with rage, as he slowly turned to Penelope, “You have much to explain, young lady—”
The Lopunny was already sitting at a table, plopping a forkful of pancake into her mouth with a dull look.
“Penelope?!” he bawked out in disbelief.
“What?! I’m not gonna let them go to waste!” She argued with a mouthful of carbs… though as she chewed, she hummed out, “Huh… not a bad cook.” She brought up her phone. “Wonder if I have his number…”
Will’s face glew bright red, as he sputtered, “D-Don’t talk about that while I’m standing here!”
Penelope groaned in annoyance, stabbing a fork back into the food as she grumbled, “What’s the big deal? It’s not like he’s my first.”
“What?!” He screamed again even louder.
“Not even the first this week.”
“Stop!” He begged, covering his face at this point as he slapped down a beige folder onto the table. “Just… here!”
Penelope picked up the folder, flicking it open and running her eyes through as they slowly widened in glee. “Oooooh, a hosting gig?!” She beamed at the older man. “What’re we talking here? The Grammys?” She gasped. “T-The Oscars?!”
Will shook his head awkwardly, letting out a sigh as he mumbled. “No… a game show.”
She paled, her hopeful expression twisting into one of slow, dawning horror as she looked a bit more carefully at the folder’s contents. “...R-Reality TV?” She whispered in disbelief…
Before she gripped onto the folder tight, throwing it to the ground. “No.”
“Penelope, be reasonable,” Will started.
“I’m a pop star, Will! Why am I… it’s trashy television bullshit!”
“Oh come on, it’s not so bad,” he wagered, “I mean… you make trashy music… b-word.”
“T-That’s different, shut up!” She huffed, shoving another pancake into her mouth, talking through the bite as she whined, “No one takes that garbage seriously! It's full of wannabes, and freaks, and losers!” She smacked her fork against the table. “I am not a loser, Will!”
“Clearly,” he mumbled. He inhaled slowly, trying to summon whatever patience he had left. “It’s the only job I could find for you, Penelope. Trust me, I tried everything!”
Penelope folded her arms and turned away, tilting her head upward in disdain. Will ran a hand across his face, sitting down in front of her as he asked, “Look… you trust me, right?”
The Lopunny snorted. “What’s that supposed to—”
“You trust me… right?” He asked again, a bit sterner.
She stared at him a moment, her eyes drifting toward the floor as she breathed in. “...Yeah.”
“Then… please,” Will continued, “understand that I just want what’s best for you.” He took a seat across from her, reaching across. “I know it’s been hard without your parents around.”
Penelope’s expression noticeably squeezed, conflicted thoughts twisting and forming into words she’d rather not say out loud.
“But I promised them, same as I promised you, that I’d always do what’s best for you,” Will explained, “and while this is hardly the most… rewarding work… it’s still work.” He smiled. “Just give it a chance.”
She breathed in… then groaned loudly. “Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine…”
Will sighed. “Oh thank goodness, cause I already agreed on your behalf.”
She choked. “What?!”
“Now,” he continued, undeterred by her glare, “in the best case scenario, if you manage to behave yourself,” he returned the glare, “which you will… your image will improve. That could mean getting your record label to approve a new album. And considering the redemption story they could tie to it, could get you back in the spotlight where you belong.”
Penelope scowled, crossing her arms and mumbling, “Assuming the show isn’t crap.”
“It won’t be if you show the people watching what quality TV could be,” Will argued back with a smile. She groaned, slumping over the table in defeat. “Now, finish eating.” He pulled his phone from his suit pocket. “We’ll be meeting your co-star in thirty.”
She lifted her head, narrowing her eyes, “Co-star?” Will hesitated, scratching the side of his face and looking away. “Not only am I stuck in reality TV, but now I have to work with some rando?”
Will cleared his throat, still not meeting her gaze. “I wouldn't say random exactly…”
Her brows furrowed. “What?” She sat up. “Do I know them?” Will remained silent, slipping further into his seat. “Will, who is my co-star?”
“Rodrigo,” a Slowbro spoke, her voice dripping with emotion. A long brown wig sat atop her head, and layers of makeup painted her otherwise blank expression. “I can't keep doing this in secret.”
“Isabela,” a Magmar replied dramatically, shuffling toward her with his arms outstretched. “You are the one for me. You ignite a fire in my heart that Roxi never could!”
“Oh, Rodrigo!”
“Isabela!”
“Barf.”
A Sneasler scoffed, leaning further back in his bubbling hot tub as a Meganium dangled a grape above his mouth. He chomped down onto it, his expression unimpressed as the show cut to commercial.
And as if on cue, that’s when the doors to his room were thrown open, Penelope stomping inside and screaming, “Rowan!”
The Sneasler grinned to himself, slowly turning in the hot tub and leaning his body forward onto it. “Pen-Pen!”
“Youuuu!” She seethed, storming toward the hot tub with an accusatory finger in his direction. “You did this on purpose, I know you did!”
“Hello to you too,” he teased with a snicker, gesturing with a wave for the Meganium to turn off his TV. “Welcome to my humble abode.”
“Cut the crap, Rowan!” Penelope folded her arms tightly across her chest. “Writing nasty things about me on your blog wasn't enough, huh? You had to personally torture me with this?”
Rowan gasped dramatically, feigning his head back as he placed a hand upon his head. “Oh, such cruel words…” His expression quickly twisted into a sneer. “Especially when I was just being honest, babe.” He leaned his head against an open palm. “Your music is made for ten-year-old girls who still believe in the tooth fairy… oh, sorry… was made.”
Penelope’s expression twisted into pure rage, her form bristling as Will glanced between her and Rowan.
“Besides,” he added with a smirk, “you could've said no. No one forced you to take the job.”
Penelope’s glare snapped to Will, who suddenly found the ceiling very interesting.
“Face it, you need my help.” Rowan laughed, resting his elbows on the edge of the hot tub. “Do a passable job, and my sources can help smooth over your image. Maybe even get your music back on the air. You could have your old life again.” He paused, before shrugging, “Till you screw it up again.”
Penelope narrowed her eyes. “And what do you get out of this?”
“Money,” he answered lazily, dipping his claw into the water to play with the bubbles, “and it gets my mom off my back. You know the jist; ‘you don't do anything with your life, Rowan. Why can’t you be like your brother? Blah, blah, blah, bleh!”
“This can’t be happening…” Penelope muttered under her breath.
“Heyyyyy, relax babe, it’ll be easy!” Rowan snickered, before waving a hand, “Anyway, I gotta get my people in here to start doing my work for me. We'll be in touch.”
Penelope's eyes widened. “Wait, we didn't even—”
“We'll be in touch!” Rowan clapped his claws together.
Before Penelope could protest, the Meganium stepped up to her, staring her down with wide, expressionless eyes as she motioned toward the door. Penelope’s stomach dropped, and Will quickly guided her backward.
Will and Penelope trudged back to their car. The Lopunny fumed with every step, arms crossed tightly over her chest, while the Cetitan beside her wore an expression of quiet discomfort.
“He’s certainly changed since his days as your co-star…” Will mused half-heartedly.
Penelope let out a false laugh. “Oh, have he?!” She snapped. “I got canceled, and he's basking in his stupid golden palace, lounging in his stupid hot tub, probably getting hand-fed stupid grapes as we speak!” She stomped her foot against the pavement. “He hasn’t changed a bit!”
Will reached the car first, opening the back door for her. “Penelope, you can't deny this is an opportunity to get your career back on track.” His voice softened as she approached. “If this works out, you’ll be back to doing what you love again.”
Penelope sighed as she trudged over, “Yeah, I know…” she admitted, shoulders slumping, “I just hate that I have to rely on him of all people.”
She looked up, and it was then that she noticed Will’s expression. And after a moment, she managed to allow a small, grateful smile. Shaking her head, she patted Will’s head as she entered the car. “Thanks for sticking around, Will.”
His expression warmed as he gently closed the door behind her. “I'll always be here to help you, Pen.”
She smiled at him, and at this same moment, she received a text. Looking down, she nearly broke the device from how hard she squeezed it.
[Unknown Number, 3 seconds ago]
seeya on filming day ;)
As Will circled around to the driver's seat, Penelope leaned back with another sigh, gazing out the window.
“Hau'oli City!”
The afternoon sun bathed a shoreline city in a golden glow, reflecting off the pristine beaches and shimmering ocean waves.
“A large city on Melemele Island, Alola!”
From above, the city stretched out into a beautiful blend of modern architecture and tropical paradise, bustling with tourists and locals walking through its vibrant streets.
“It's known as the city that overflows with gentle joy, whose residents are widely known for opening their arms to tourists of all cultures from around the world!”
A golden drone glided over the scenery, capturing the city's welcoming embrace as it dipped lower toward an airport runway. The closer it got, the more it slowly revealed a Lopunny dressed in a pink jacket with sunglasses perched on her head.
“And that's exactly why we're kicking off the very first episode of the best show on television right here!” She lifted her arms, showcasing the breathtaking cityscape behind her.
She placed a hand on each of her hips as she flashed the camera a grin. “Eighteen Pokémon from all around the world will be arriving here today, and will soon have the opportunity to travel far and wide, seeing the world in a way they never have before!”
“But don't be fooled, this is hardly some relaxing, all-expense paid vacation!” She leaned in with a playful smirk. “Oh no, if they want to stay, they'll have to endure the most physically, mentally taxing game imaginable!”
Her expression turned serious as she lowered her tone, leaning in toward the camera as she explained, “There will be drama! Heartbreak! Betrayal! Maybe even love, and friendships that could last a lifetime!” Striking a confident pose, Penelope brought up a hand and exclaimed, “We can't predict what will happen, but one thing's for sure, this is an adventure of a lifetime!”
With a dramatic flourish, a cascade of green bills rained down around her. She lifted her arms, laughing as money fluttered from the sky. “And best of all, the last contestant standing will walk away with a check for one million pokédollars!” She grinned, letting out a giggle as she tilted her head back. “A generous prize, and a chance to travel the world? Sign me up!”
Winking at the camera, the Lopunny announced, “I’m your host, Penelope Hart!”
She cringed as a second figure slid into frame, a Sneasler leaning forward and onto a scowling Penelope’s head as he shot the camera a wink. “And I’m your far cooler, hotter, and more lovable co-host, Rowan Bass!”
Penelope pushed Rowan off of her, quickly collecting herself as she wrapped up with, “And this is…” She spread her arms wide and declared, “Totally! Real! Wooooooooorld Tour!”