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How to Annoy The Empty With Five Bad Ideas a Day - An Angel Escape Guide

Summary:

Gabriel wakes up in the empty after Lucifer killed him…again. So, bored out of his mind he stats to make as much of a ruckus as can reasonably be expected in an empty void, in hopes that The Empty will get tired of his bullshit and just kick him out.

Notes:

So, a couple nights ago I was laying awake, unable to sleep. When for no reason the song Tuffnut created to distract the Outcasts and Berserkers in Defenders of Berk started to go through my head. But it wasn’t in Tuffnut’s voice it was in Gabriel’s. Which ultimately lead to me asking the question, ‘huh, what if Gabriel sang that song to try and annoy The Empty into letting him go.’ So here’s that. I hope you enjoy 😊

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Everything was dark and silent. The silence so dense and deep you could hear a pin drop. And when the proverbial pin did drop so to speak it was loud.

“Ugh! I’m so~ board. Why does it have to be so boring in here?” Gabriel grumbles bouncing a hot pink bouncy ball off the ‘walls’ of the Empty.

Gabriel was no stranger to being in the empty, he was sure he’d been here more separate times than any Angel. But something seemed different this time. He’d been sitting alone in the dark for fuck knows how long but The Empty just wasn’t showing up to yell at him for being awake and more annoyingly, loud about it. Which was highly concerning as that’s how he would always get out. Just by annoying The Empty so much it booted him. But that wouldn’t work if it wasn’t showing up.

“Hey! Asshole! Where are you!? I have shit to do! People to see, a nephew to bond with, a giant to apologize to. So would you quite sleeping and get your lazy ass over here and let me out!” Gabriel yells stomping his feet like a petulant toddler.

When that still does nothing Gabriel clenches his jaw and uses what little grace he has access to here to summon a pot and a large metal spoon which he promptly proceeds to bang together while yelling. “HEY! COME AND GET IT!” Before groaning loudly and flopping to the ground, dropping the pot and spoon in the process.

“What’s an Angel gotta do to get outta here?” He grumbles, his arms outstretched on the ‘floor’ as he stared up at the ‘ceiling’.

Everything seems to go back to the dense quiet that usually resided within The Empty, but it doesn’t last long as Gabriel starts to hum to himself as he throws his bouncy ball around making it jump all over the place, and a moment later Gabriel’s somewhat quiet humming had upgraded to him banging his pot and spoon together as loudly as he could while he ‘sang’ now I say sang but what I really meant was shout sang at the top of his lungs.

“Hooligan tribe, won't you come out tonight! Come out tonight, come out tonight! Hooligan tribe, won't you come out tonight! Or die by the light of the moon! Oh, by the light of the moon Oh, by the light of the moon! Remember to use your fork and your knife, and also use your spoon, and also use your spoon, and also use your-“

Only to be cut off at the end as the whole world around him seems to echo with the loud words of “WILL YOU SHUT UP!?” as the Empty manifested in front of Gabriel looking exactly like him, except supremely pissed off.

“Oh, there you are! Ya’ handsome devil. I was looken for you.” Gabriel says with a grin as he stands up, brushing non existent dust off his pants.

“I’m not letting you out again. I have no idea how you keep WAKING UP. But you will go back to sleep and stay asleep.” The Empty scowls as it creeps towards Gabriel.

“Sorry, no can do Boo.” Gabriel says clicking his tough as he smacks the tendrils of darkness away from himself.

“Now, you know I really do love our time together, but unfortunately, I do have much more important things to do. Like Sam, if you catch my drift. Hey-O! So if you could just spit me out I would love you forever, and I’ll try to give you a bit of a break before you need to see my wonderful self again. Twice in one century is already too much if you ask me.” Gabriel says, offering The Empty his most charming smile.

“I said no. No one is ever leaving here again!” The Empty yells, the darkness all around Gabriel seeming to vibrate angrily as it does so making him flinch

“Shadow!” A voice then yells as the dark emptiness is flooded with a blinding light.

The Empty whips around coming face to face with…

“Jack?” Gabriel says in shock. “What are you doing here kid? You’re not dead are you?”

“Hi Uncle Gabriel! No I’m not dead.” Jack says with a smile and a little wave, before turning to face The Shadow his smile dropping, replaced by a serious look that’s unsettling out of place on his face, his wings spreading wide, engulfing the nothingness around them in light.

“You will release my family, once you do we will leave you be. You’ll never have to deal with any of us ever again. You have my word.” “And what good is your word? Young God. As good as your father’s?” The Empty say baring its teeth angrily.

“I am not here on the behalf of Castiel. I am here because I need my family back. So, this will be the only time I step in, to interfere with you. So please.” “You…swear?” The Empty asks, narrowing its eyes and tilting its head jerkily. “I swear.” Jack says with a nod as he stands up straight, puffing his chest out slightly.

The Empty stares at Jack for a moment, Gabriel rocking back and forth on his heels as he watches the conversation.

Jack then extends his hand towards The Empty. There was another brief moment of pause before The Empty extended its hand and shakes Jacks.

The moment their hands meet there was a blinding flash and Gabriel was out like a light.

Notes:

I’m planning on hopefully turning this into a series, so like adding reunions and stuff with everyone after Jack rescued them.