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Voldsoy was different from Trench.
Trench was alive, beautiful, and full of green, but Voldsoy was cold and barren. The trees only had snow on them instead of leaves, and the wind constantly blew harshly. Clancy hoped he’d be used to it by now, but his mind was still trying to figure out what just happened.
It had been a little over a month since he washed up on shore with the Torchbearer, the only person he felt safe around now. After wandering around the island cold and sick, they finally found shelter with the Neds. Clancy was a little scared of them at first, but he quickly got attached. He couldn’t resist how cute they were after long. Some nights if he was too cold or plagued with nightmares from his time at Dema, a couple would snuggle close to comfort him. It made his heart warmer than anything. It also grounded him and reminded that he did escape from that city. He was…
Was he…free? No, no, surely they would find him eventually. This was just a temporary shelter to make him think he was free before he was dragged back there. He couldn’t let himself believe that again. How many times has he escaped from there now? Eight? Nine? They always ended the same. How much longer would he try again before he gave up? The question reminded him of the permanent mark left on him by Nico. The smear on his neck ached as he remembered. It reminded him of what he just escaped from and what his ultimate fate would be. He couldn’t go back there. He couldn’t go through all that again. He’d do anything to make sure he wouldn’t be used as a puppet by them again. But then he thought about the attack on the ship. Maybe they thought he also died? After all, there were no other survivors. None other than Torch, of course. Maybe Clancy was free.
Clancy didn’t know how he would even be alive without Torch right now. The Neds definitely helped them both, but Torch was different. He helped him get to land, made him new clothes from some scraps that were found on the beach, and helped Clancy with hunting for food. Oftentimes, though, he would go off on his own, searching for either supplies or food. Which left Clancy where he was now. Huddling in a cave alone with a small fire.
After staying with the Neds, they decided to venture out and find materials to make their way back to Trench. It wasn’t ideal for Clancy, but he figured that Torch knew what was best, and what they needed to do was return back home. Home. Was Trench even still home for Clancy? He didn’t know how long he’d been gone, but it had to have been at least a few years. The thought terrified him.
He didn’t usually mind Torch leaving him, but this time it left a pit of nausea in his stomach. It started snowing heavily again not too long after Torch left, and he still hadn’t made his way back to Clancy yet. Eventually Clancy curled up next to his fire and fell asleep, hoping his only friend would be back again when he woke up.
Unfortunately he was still alone in the morning. The fire had died off by now, and Clancy was left shivering in the dark cave with the morning light starting to peek in.
“..Torch…?” Clancy called out sleepily. No response. Maybe he had to find some shelter for the night. He’ll find his way back soon. He has to.
Clancy started the fire again and tried warming himself back up, still waiting for Torch to get back. As hours passed, his nerves got worse, and his mind started throwing worst-case-scenarios at him.
He probably got hurt somewhere and can’t make his way back.
The bishops might’ve found him and took him in as a hostage.
He probably decided to finally leave you, since you’re such a burden.
“No, no…” Clancy dug his head into his knees and started to hit his head with his fist as an attempt to quiet the voices. Torch was okay, he was coming back, he was going to be back any minute now. “He’s okay, he’s okay, he’s okay-”
What if he needs you right now? You’re just sitting here when he could be in serious danger.
What if he’s already dead?
It would be your fault if he died alone.
Clancy stood up quickly and shakily made his way out of the cave entrance. He was hit with an immediate headache from the bright snow and sky outside. After all, mind was still adjusting to being outside his cell in Dema, not used to all the light around him. Where are you, Torch? Clancy thought as he made his way through the trees. It was so eerily quiet on the island. Clancy didn’t think it was possible for anything to be alive here. He and Torch were just lucky enough to find some deer and fish to live off of.
“Torch!” He called out as he stumbled his way through the snow. “Torch, where are you?!” Please be okay. No response. Fuck.
Clancy had walked through the forest for over an hour now with no luck finding the other man. There weren’t even any Neds close by to keep him company. He was alone. Again. Just like his cell. No, not like that at all. Nothing could ever compare to that. He needed to focus on finding Torch before slipping into those thoughts. Clancy climbed the closest tree in hopes of seeing where Torch might have gone. It hurt his limbs as he pushed himself up, but he had to do this. He wouldn’t forgive himself if his friend was hurt and he wasn’t there to help. Hell, he didn’t even know if Torch still considered them to be friends. He finally made it high enough to see the island around him. His body was screaming at him to stop, and the only energy he had left was to hold onto the tree’s trunk. Clancy scanned the landscape around him, hoping to see if that familiar bright yellow would stand out somewhere. It was nowhere to be seen.
“Torch!” Clancy yelled again, more desperately this time, hearing his voice echo above the forest.
It was no use anymore. Torch was going to die somewhere on this island and it would be Clancy’s fault. God, why didn’t I go with Torch this time? I’m such an idiot! He thought. Taking a deep breath, he decided to start climbing back down.
Clancy made it about halfway down the tree before a shrill screech froze him completely. Vultures. He slowly turned his head around to see a group of them flying straight towards him. Clancy started panicking immediately, trying to get his hat to cover his pink hair quickly and cover himself with his cape to blend into the trees. They found me. They know I’m here. Fuck, fuck, fuck! He clung onto the tree as tightly as he could and curled into himself. His thoughts mixed with the vulture cries made his breath quicken and heart start racing. It’s over. They’re gonna drag me back there. I can’t go back there. I can’t live through that again. I can’t even say goodbye to Torch. Where is he? Did they find him too? How could I be so stupid? I’ll never be free from them. I’ll never escape, I’ll never escape-
He could hear the vultures circling above him now. Their cries echoed around him and only made his hyperventilating worse. Clancy didn’t dare to look up. If he saw them, he would know for sure it was over. He was never free. He could never be free. The smear was burning with pain now as he panicked. His neck and hands were on fire, but Clancy didn’t care. He kept holding on to the tree and prayed that the leaves and snow around him hid him from the birds. Hot tears fell down his face as he continued to struggle breathing. Clancy felt a sudden wave of nausea and dizziness from the overwhelming atmosphere. He tried to hold on. If he let go he’d be taken back to Dema. Back to being a prisoner. A puppet.
“..ncy?” A new voice joined the chorus swirling in Clancy’s mind. It sounded familiar, but it was hard to decipher among the screams. “Clancy!”
It was Nico, wasn’t it? He used his vultures to find Clancy and succeeded. Clancy’s stomach was doing flips now. He was completely frozen and laid still awaiting his fate.
“Clancy!”
His eyes shot open with a gasp. Someone was standing over him.
“Clancy, hey, it’s okay, I’m here.” The person said. Suddenly he felt hands on him and jerked away.
“D-don’t touch me!” He forced out. He pushed himself back quickly before hitting a tree behind him. When did I get down? He asked himself.
“Okay, I won’t touch you.” The voice returned. Clancy’s tears still blurred his vision as he tried to wipe them away to see who was with him. This was definitely not Nico. Who was this?
“I need you to breathe, okay?” Clancy nodded shakily. “I’m sorry I was gone for so long. I didn’t mean to leave you alone like that.”
Leave me alone? Oh. “…Torch?” Clancy asked.
His vision cleared, and he saw the familiar green and yellow before him. “Yes, it’s me, Clancy, I’m here.” Torch replied with a small smile, but it was clear how concerned he was.
“It’s you.” Clancy started to calm down. He was safe. Torch was safe. Torch was alive. He didn’t get taken. Neither of them did. “You’re okay?”
Torch moved in closer to his friend. “Yes, of course I’m okay. Are you okay?”
“I…” He looked around. There was no sight of the vultures anymore. The only sound he could hear was breathing starting to become slower.
“What’s wrong?”
“The vultures, they were just here…”
“Vultures? What vultures?”
“F-from…from Dema.” Clancy felt his throat tighten. “They found me.” Another tear fell down his cheek.
“No, they didn’t. You’re still with me. We’re still on Voldsoy. You’re not in Dema.”
Clancy turned to look Torch in the eye. “I’m not…” He looked around him again. Still in the forest. The sun was beginning to set. He was sat against a tree on the ground with Torch next to him. “This is real?” He asked.
“Yes, this is real.”
“You…you’re real?”
Torch hesitated this time, albeit slightly. “Yes. I’m real.” He put his hand on Clancy’s shoulder. “Is this okay?”
Clancy flinched before leaning into the touch. “Yes, yes it’s okay. You’re real…” Eventually he leaned completely onto Torch’s chest, and Torch hugged him tightly.
The two sat together in each other’s arms until the sun was gone. The cold weather was back, but Clancy felt the warmest he’d been all day in Torch’s arms. Eventually Torch stood up and helped Clancy get to his feet. He lit his Torch and held Clancy’s hand.
“It’s dark out. We need to find shelter.” He said. Clancy nodded. Thankfully, they weren’t too far from the shelter they had the previous night. They relit the fire and laid next to each other. Torch wrapped his arms around Clancy again. “Is this okay?” Clancy nodded.
It was silent between the two for a few moments, the crackling fire being the only sound heard, until Torch broke the silence again.
“I am really sorry I was gone for so long. I won’t do that again.”
Clancy looked into the other man’s eyes. They were full of regret, anxiousness, but also love.
“I won’t go wandering on my own again either.” Clancy answered. “I’m sorry I worried you too.”
“Hey, it’s not your fault. You had a right to be worried. It…means a lot that you care so much.” Torch held him tighter.
“Of course I care. You’re my best friend.”
Torch let out a sigh and gave Clancy a warm smile. “Yeah..you are too.”
The two eventually fell asleep, and Clancy had never felt more safe since he escaped the city.