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Chan had many responsibilities. When he was a child, he had to tidy up his toys and make his bed every morning. As a teenager, he had to get good grades and stay out of trouble. Throughout adulthood, he had to work and pay his bills. Being a vampire came with responsibilities, too.
Even if he was dead and nearly immortal, Chan had no room to slack off. He had to catch his own meals and prepare his feeds routinely, lest he really died from lack of blood intake. He took it upon himself to ensure his vampiric identity remained hidden, too. When he met Changbin, the responsibility only intensified.
Changbin was so sweet, he was everything Chan could ever ask for. Considerate, funny, not to mention drop dead gorgeous. Literally. Chan fell in love the second he laid eyes on Changbin: he was crouched in the bushes behind his house, in the middle of a hunt. They hit it off beautifully, and Chan was able to call Changbin his lover after only a few months of courting. Chan was almost positive that there was nothing that could come between their love.
Almost positive. There was still one thing coming between them, a small but major difference between Chan and Changbin. It made itself clear after every one of Chan’s hunts, when he returned to their home, his manor, covered in animal blood and buzzing with the adrenaline from a fresh feed.
Changbin was human, Chan was not.
It was less of an issue for Changbin and more of an issue for Chan. The vampire spent years, decades, perfecting his self control. The vampire who turned him abandoned him, leaving Chan with no one to teach him how to be a true vampire. He spent his early fledgling years learning how to hunt animals in the least violent way possible, and he taught himself how to control his primal urges for blood. He taught himself how to hide his fangs, how to steady his eye color when he went into public surrounded by humans. Eventually, he was completely unaffected by human temptation. Their blood had close to no appeal to him, and he was even able to make human friends, leaving them completely oblivious of his hidden identity.
He remained unaffected and strong willed for many more decades, until Changbin came into the picture.
Changbin was the epitome of temptation to Chan. Everything the human did had the vampire questioning his years of hard work. Changbin could sigh and Chan’s slow heart would skip a beat or two. When Changbin kissed him, his fangs throbbed so intensely that it gave him migraines. He wasn’t worried about it, though. If anything, he could play it off as being flustered by his boyfriend. Nothing more, nothing less.
But Changbin liked to push. He pushed and pushed and eventually Chan broke, revealing his sharp fangs to the human with tears streaming down his face. Changbin had never seen Chan cry before, and he was shocked, to say the least. Chan was shocked, too. He was overwhelmed with emotions; he had somehow convinced himself that Changbin wouldn’t want him if he knew who he really was. He’d leave, frightened and angry at Chan for lying and hiding himself for so long. So, naturally, he was upset at himself for showing his other side, his ugly side.
Changbin didn’t think it was ugly, not at all. The fact that his boyfriend of two years was a fucking vampire made him infinitely more beautiful, and Changbin fell in love all over again. He reassured Chan that he wasn’t ugly, and told him he’d never leave him for something so simple. They fell back into their comfortable rhythm again, almost as if the entire ordeal had never occurred in the first place.
Everything was perfect, Chan had Changbin by his side and he no longer feared losing him. Everything was fine, smooth, until Chan’s next feed. It was his first feed since revealing his secret to Changbin, and he came back to his house as he normally did after a hunt, panting and bloody in the face. He’d tried teaching himself to be less of a messy eater, but it didn’t work. He usually hunted late in the night and returned before the sun rose so Changbin wouldn’t see the evidence. Changbin was always asleep when he crawled back into bed, gums buzzing and insides warm and gooey from the fresh blood making its way throughout his body.
This time, Changbin is awake. He’s sitting up in bed when Chan walks into their bedroom, making the vampire stop in his tracks.
“Y-You’re awake.”
Changbin yawns. “Why’re you dressed? Did you go somewhere?” He asks softly, voice gentle with fatigue. He leans over and flicks on the lamp that sits on the bedside table, beckoning Chan over with a hand. “Come, let me see you.”
Chan can do many things, but what he absolutely can’t do is say no to Changbin. So he goes over to the bed. His face and hands are stained red with blood, deer blood. He usually doesn’t clean himself up in the bathroom connected to the bedroom, he uses the one in the basement. But tonight he was feeling lazy, and now he’s facing the consequences.
“What’s on your face? And your hands?” Changbin asks. Chan stands in front of him, his lips sealed shut. His eyes are wide, and Changbin can see a faint glow around his irises. “Hyung? Are you okay? Why’re you so messy?”
Chan panics a little. His eyes dart around the dimly lit room, avoiding Changbin entirely. His fingers start to fidget from where they rest at his sides, and he bites at his inner cheek as he tries to figure out how to explain himself in a way that won’t leave him single by sunrise.
“Um- I was hungry. I needed to- I had to feed.” Chan mumbles. His lips are chapped, but he doesn’t lick them. He doesn’t deserve to right now.
“Feed? Like- like blood? Is that blood on your mouth and your hands, hyung?” Changbin asks. His eyebrows scrunch just the slightest bit as he looks up at his messy boyfriend, and Chan feels his heart clench. Changbin’s lips are settled in a soft pout, and he has a bit of crust in his eyes. His black hair is a mess, tangled curls covering most of his forehead and ears.
“Yeah. It’s blood,” Chan admits. “B-but it’s not human, it’s animal blood! I don’t feed from humans, I promise!” He adds on quickly. He stares at Changbin, watching his face for any hint of emotion, any sort of reaction to the confession. The human’s face changes, and it morphs into a scowl. He’s finished, Changbin’s definitely breaking up with him. He must be so disgusted by Chan, his boyfriend is covered in animal blood for fucks sake-
“How come you didn’t ask me?” Changbin suddenly speaks. He’s staring Chan directly in the eyes, making the vampire’s breath catch in his throat.
Chan’s mouth opens and closes, his words coming out in airy stutters. “Ask- ask you? Why would I- what would I ask you for, Changbin?” He finally asks.
Chan expects Changbin to say something along the lines of why didn’t you ask if I was okay with this? He wouldn’t have an answer to that question, since it never once crossed his mind. He kept his hunts hidden for a reason: to prevent a situation like this from occurring. He wants Changbin to live as much of a normal life as possible, and he can’t do that if his boyfriend routinely comes home covered in blood. What he absolutely does not expect Changbin to ask is-
“Why didn’t you ask to feed from me?” He sounds jealous, offended even.
Chan’s eyes widen so far and he thinks they might just roll out of his head. “What?! I-I couldn’t do that to you, Changbin. You wouldn’t want something like that, something so- so dirty-”
“Who said that? You don’t know what I want.” Changbin quips. He’s right, Chan never asked, so he doesn’t really know.
“You’re right, I’m sorry,” Chan says. “Is that something you would want?”
Changbin nods. “Yeah, I wouldn’t mind. It would be helping you, right? I want to help you.” He says honestly.
No, Chan won’t allow it. He won’t do such a thing to Changbin, bite him and steal from him in such an intimate way. He trained for this, he doesn’t need human blood.
“I can’t let you do that.” The vampire says, his voice serious.
“But I want to. I want you to use me, hyung. Take whatever you need, I’ll give it to you.” Changbin replies, suddenly breathless. Chan watches as his human lover takes his bottom lip into his mouth, he looks a little embarrassed at the raw admission.
“Thank you, but I can’t do that to you, I refuse.” Chan finishes his sentence and turns on his heel, quickly walking to the bathroom to clean himself up. As he scrubs his face he replays Changbin’s words in his head, and he feels his gums throb.
That was the first time Changbin had openly admitted to wanting Chan in such a way, and it certainly wasn’t the last.
Chan has a routine for nearly everything. His grocery trips are planned, laundry days are planned, and, most importantly, his feeding hunts are planned. Every three weeks, he goes out for his hunt, illuminated by the moonlight. He’s done a series of trial and error to perfect his routine, and three weeks is what works best for him. If he goes longer than three weeks without a feed, the symptoms become increasingly severe and he loses his precious control.
The next couple of months flow by regularly, and Chan continues to feed from animal blood. The only difference is that now, Changbin makes it his business to catch Chan as he’s coming home from a hunt. He waits in bed, half awake, just so he can pout and sulk at the older vampire.
“Why won’t you bite me? Do you think I won’t taste good?” The human asks one night. Chan had just returned from a hunt, and they were cuddling together in the comfort of their own bed. When Chan feeds, he runs warm for a few days following, and Changbin loves to take advantage of it. He’s currently shoved up against Chan’s side, one arm wrapped around the vampire’s torso and his head resting on Chan’s warm shoulder.
Chan chuckles at the question. “No, yeobo. It’s the exact opposite. I’m scared you’ll taste too good, and I won’t be able to control myself,” he admits. “I would never forgive myself if I lost control on you, it’s my biggest fear.”
Changbin hums. “But you won’t lose control. You’re smart, hyung. You’ll know how to stop, I know you would,” he mumbles.
“I’m glad you think that way of me, but I won’t take any chances,” Chan replies, pressing a gentle kiss onto Changbin’s forehead. “Go to sleep, baby. Don’t worry yourself about this, yeah? I’ll be fine, promise.”
Changbin complies, but only because he can’t keep his eyes open any longer.
Chan did not feel well at all.
It’s been three and a half weeks since his last feed, and he was feeling all of the effects. His head throbbed relentlessly, all day and night. He hasn’t slept in days, the buzzing under his skin preventing him from relaxing at all. He was jumpy and shakey, a pin drop could startle him out of his skin. The worst symptom was his gums. His entire mouth has been throbbing for days, and it feels like his jaw is stuck between a hydraulic press.
The reason for the delay in his hunt is the weather. He picked a spot to settle down where it didn’t snow much at all. He chose a beautiful manor and made himself at home, comfortable in the belief that he would always be able to feed when he needed to.
This year, everything changed. Right on schedule, exactly twenty one days after his last hunt, Chan was ready to go out again. He was dressed in a hoodie and sweatpants, both articles of clothing covered in bloodstains. They were his go-to hunting clothes, and he paired them with his heavy duty hunting boots. It was chillier outside than normal, being the middle of winter. He opened the front door and expected to find his front yard, but instead he was met with white. It snowed a lot.
Chan sighed, turning on his heel and closing the door behind him. He could wait another day, maybe the snow will have melted by then. When he usually hunts there’s not a speck of snow on the ground, he’s able to see all the grass and dirt ahead of him.
Two more days pass and Chan becomes antsy. He’s practically itching to get outside, so he dresses himself up and swings the front door open again. The snow hasn’t melted at all, if anything it’s gotten heavier.
It’s okay, Chan can handle it. He’ll still be able to feed, he just has to find an animal. So what if the snow is coming up to his knees and he’s struggling to walk through it, he’ll be fine.
The vampire trudges through the thick, cold snow, squinting for any signs of life. He’s shivering, teeth chattering together and fangs poking into his bottom lip. With every second that passes he gets hungrier, he would usually be finished feeding by now.
It’ll be alright. He can take breaks so he won’t be so dizzy, and he’ll probably find a bunny or something soon. He won’t be outside in the cold for long, just a bit longer. He’ll find something to feed from and he’ll get back home and cuddle with Changbin.
Chan is outside for another hour. He’s trudged through so much snow that his sweatpants are completely soaked through, and he isn’t even sure he can feel his toes anymore. He stops to lean against a tree and catch his breath. Every time he blinks his vision spins, he’s nearly puked way too many times already.
He has to get back home. He won’t find anything out here, and if he stays out any longer he might collapse. The vampire begins the journey back home, and it’s even more difficult than the one out into the forest. He isn’t sure how long it takes for him to reach home, but he makes it eventually. He doesn’t even realize that he’s begun to cry, his face is wet with tears and he’s sniffling as he shoves himself through the heavy front door of his manor.
“Channie-hyung!” Changbin’s voice is the last thing Chan hears before everything goes black.
—
The vampire’s eyes shoot open, and he immediately sits up. He’s panting and his eyes are wide, darting around to assess his surroundings.
“Hyung, you’re alive!” A voice- Changbin cries from next to him. Chan blinks again and finally registers where he is.
He’s in bed, in his room, his home. He made it home, thank god.
“Changbinnie-”
“What were you thinking! Are you insane, going out in that weather?!” Changbin shouts. “I thought I lost you, hyung.”
Chan stares at Changbin, guilt consuming his soul. Changbin has pulled a dining room chair into their bedroom and positioned it at the edge of the bed. His face is red and covered in dry tear streaks and he looks absolutely miserable. Chan can’t help but admire his beauty, Changbin’s always been a pretty crier.
“Hyung is sorry, baby,” Chan whispers. He reaches a weak hand out to rub a stray tear off of his boyfriend’s cheek, frowning when another follows.
“You need to lie down. You’re still weak, I don’t need you getting hurt any more.” Changbin stands, pushing Chan back down into the pillows. He realizes that he’s no longer wet, and he looks down to see that he’s in fresh clothes. Changbin must’ve changed him out of his hunting fabrics, and the thought makes Chan smile.
“M’sorry, really. I thought I’d be fine out there,” Chan mumbles.
Changbin only sniffles. He crouches down and grabs a warm rag from a bucket that Chan only now notices, and places it onto the vampire’s forehead. Chan sighs, the warm rag relieving some of the tension behind his eyes.
“You were so cold, I thought you were dead.” Changbin says, voice wobbly. Instead of sitting back in the chair, he walks around to the other side of the bed and crawls under the covers, pulling Chan into his chest, careful to not jostle the towel on his face.
“But I’m not, I’m okay,” Chan says.
“You’re not okay!” Changbin shouts. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to yell,” he says. He pulls Chan closer, massages his jaw with gentle hands.
Chan winces sharply, but leans into the touch. His eyes squeeze shut and his eyebrows furrow, the throbbing behind his eyes has returned tenfold. It’s at that moment that he realizes: he still hasn’t fed. He’s all over Changbin, and he’s hungry.
“Oh my god, I-I’m so sorry,” he panics, sitting up and pulling himself away from Changbin's warm embrace. “I shouldn’t be this close to you, I haven’t fed yet and I could hurt you, Changbin-“
Changbin groans, shushing the vampire and pulling him back into his arms. “Will you stop with that? You’re not some barbaric monster, hyung. You won’t hurt me, it’s okay.”
Chan sighs. He relaxes into his human’s hold slightly, but he’s still on edge.
“You said you hadn’t fed yet, right?” Changbin asks. He doesn’t wait for Chan to respond before continuing, “You’ll feed from me tonight.”
“Absolutely not.”
“I’m not taking no for an answer! I refuse to let you hurt yourself like this when I’m right here, Chan-hyung.” Changbin says, his tone bordering on anger. “You don’t have to be scared, you know what you’re doing, right?”
Chan whines, pushing his face into Changbin’s chest and hiding there. “I know how to feed from animals. I’ve never ever taken blood from a human before, not once. I-I don’t even know how!” His voice breaks, and his eyes well up with tears.
Changbin hums, running his fingers through the vampire’s messy brown hair. “I’m sure it won’t be that different, hyung. You can do it, I believe in you. If it goes wrong, I’ll push you off, okay?” He soothes.
Chan lays in silence, weighing his options. If he continues to delay his blood intake, his symptoms will only worsen. He’ll end up sick very soon, and vampires are not the best at healing from illness. He’s already miserable, his head feels like it’s going to explode and his limbs burn from fatigue.
“Are you sure you want this? You can say no,” He mumbles.
“I want it, yeobo. Now sit up, over my lap. I’ll help you through it, okay?” Changbin takes the lead, sensing the distress of his hungry partner.
Chan nods, sitting up with a wince and settling himself over Changbin’s thighs, facing him. Changbin’s hands instantly come to rest at the vampire’s hips, pulling him closer until their noses are almost touching. Chan feels another pang of hunger rack through him, and suddenly he can smell.
Changbin smells so fucking good, it’s addicting. He smells sweet and sour at the same time, and Chan can feel his body erupt with goosebumps. He looks into the human’s face and whimpers, Changbin is so beautiful.
“You okay?” Changbin asks, tilting Chan’s head up with a finger under his chin.
Chan nods, his breath coming out shakey. “Mhm, m’good. I can- you smell, smell so good, baby. M’hungry,” He says. His mouth hangs open now, and his fangs drip with drool, the droplets landing on Changbin’s wrist.
“Yeah, I bet. You’ve done so well already, so strong for me, hyung,” the human rambles, smirking when Chan whines again. “You gonna let me help you? You’ll feed from me, from riiight here,” he points to his neck, tapping the skin with his fingers.
“Yeah, need it, m’so hungry, Bin,” Chan whines, squirming where he sits.
Changbin nods, pulling Chan forward some more. He brings a hand up to rest behind the vampire’s neck, gently bringing his face down to the skin between his neck and shoulder. Chan instantly shoves his nose into the skin and inhales, moaning deeply.
“Smells good?” Changbin teases. “Go ahead, baby. Bite me.”
Chan nods. He wraps his arms around Changbin’s waist and tugs him forward, making the human yelp. He opens his mouth, cold breath puffing over Changbin’s skin and making him shiver. Drool pools on the human, and he whines.
“Go on, baby. I’ve got you, it’s okay. Take all you need,” Changbin whispers into Chan’s ear.
The vampire nods jerkily, opening his mouth wider and licking Changbin’s skin. He pulls back, letting his fangs poke at the skin as he takes a deep breath.
Changbin tenses, preparing himself for a sting, a burn, anything. He doesn’t feel either of those things, though. He feels Chan’s lips press against his neck, the sensation similar to that of a kiss.
The vampire quickly pulls back, as if he’s been stung.
“I dunno what to do!” He speaks, fangs giving him a slight lisp.
Changbin giggles. Chan was so nervous that he kissed him, instead of biting. The action is so endearing, Changbin leans forward and presses a kiss to Chan’s lips himself.
“Don’ laugh, s’not funny! My teef hurt and I’m hungry, n’you’re laughing at me!” Chan cries, and a tear rolls down his cheek. His bottom lip wobbles as he weeps and Changbin laughs again, kissing the pout off the vampire’s face and wiping his tears away. “You’re still laughing. M’not drinking from you anymore, you’re so mean.”
“No, I’m sorry!” Changbin smirks. He’s never seen Chan act this sulky before, it must be the hunger messing with his emotional regulation skills. “I won’t laugh anymore, I’m sorry, pretty baby. Don’t cry, it’s okay,” he soothes, wiping more tears away and kissing Chan’s cold cheeks.
Chan sniffles, but the tears come to a stop. “You have to help me. I dunno what I’m doing,” he admits, looking away in embarrassment.
“Baby, you have to bite me. Like a treat, just for you. Imagine I’m a cupcake or something. Sink those teeth into me, hyung,” Changbin directs. Chan nods, his eyes trailing back to Changbin’s spit-slick neck. He’s so hungry he can practically hear the blood flowing under his boyfriend’s skin, and he gets lost in it for a moment.
Changbin snaps his fingers in Chan’s face, breaking his daze. He shoves Chan back into his neck and yells when he finally feels it: two sharp teeth piercing into his skin.
“Oh, shit- ah!” He cries, but it falls upon deaf ears. He moans again as he feels Chan begin to suck, the sensation is so weird and he doesn’t know what to do. The hairs on his neck stand up and he quivers in Chan’s hold, whining out loud.
“Good, hyung, s’good. D-Do you feel good, baby? How do I taste?” Changbin talks to himself. Chan is groaning and sucking at his neck, his hands scratching where they’re tucked behind Changbin’s lower back.
The two of them remain locked together for another minute, until Chan’s fangs retract. He remains latched onto the human’s neck, whimpering as he suckles at the open wound, no longer drawing blood.
“There you go, see? That wasn’t so bad, was it?” Changbin soothes. He rubs a soothing hand over the back of Chan’s neck, rocking them side to side to quiet his stream of whimpers. “You’re okay, yeobo. M'right here, I’m okay. You didn’t hurt me, I knew you’d be okay,”
Slowly, slowly, Chan stops suckling. He pulls his lips off of Changbin’s neck, but makes no move to sit up.
“Changbin, m’so full,” he whines. “Good, y-you’re so good, so sweet.”
Changbin feels himself blushing at the praise. “Thank you, hyungie. I’m glad I could help. Are you gonna let me help you again? Was this a one time thing?”
“No! I want- only want you, baby. Don’t want animals anymore, jus’ you, please,” Chan begs. He finally sits up, wobbling a little before Changbin steadies him with hands on his waist. His mouth is covered in deep red blood and he’s pouting, his eyes wet with unshed tears. “Can I? Are you gonna make me still use animals?” He asks.
Changbin smiles, “Of course not, love. You can use me as much as you’d like, as long as you don’t bleed me dry. I’m here for you to use, hyung.” He says.
Changbin grabs Chan’s face in his hands and gently pushes their lips together again, licking the bloody mess off of Chan’s face and cheeks. It tastes metallic and it’s honestly disgusting, but he finishes the job either way. The taste was worth it, Chan practically melts in his hold as he gets his face cleaned.
The vampire yawns, falling forward and snuggling his face into Changbin’s neck again. “Did it hurt?” He asks, voice soft.
“A little, but it went away quickly. It felt really good, actually. I had a good time,” Changbin admits bashfully.
“Thank you, Changbin. For everything, I wouldn’t have made it without you,” Chan whispers, the gravity of his situation finally catching up to him.
Changbin hums, pulling the thick blanket over the two of them and cradling Chan’s head against him. “Of course. I would do anything for you, do you know that? I want you to remember that, yeobo.” He whispers.
Chan nods, and the next noise he makes is a snore.
Changbin finally exhales, letting his body go lax against the pillows. His heart is still racing and his neck throbs where the vampire’s fangs were sunken in just earlier, but he feels good. He floats in the post-feed bliss, smiling to himself. Chan finally caved and used him like he’s been begging him to for almost a year. There’s nothing more Changbin could ask for. He’d spend the rest of eternity with Chan if he could.
Oh.
Changbin wants- no, needs Chan to turn him. Immediately. He won’t stop until he has a pair of fangs to call his own, and a promise of eternal love with his soulmate.