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Kuroo dropped his bag loudly onto the table next to the comfiest chair on campus. The chair’s occupant, a young man with short blond hair and glasses, didn’t acknowledge his presence. The headphones over his ears probably accounted for that. Kuroo cleared his throat and declared, also loudly, “That’s my chair.”
Glasses guy looked up at him, one eyebrow raised almost imperceptibly. Kuroo gestured at the chair and said again, “That’s my chair.” The eyebrow twitched upward a fraction more but otherwise the other man gave no indication that he was understanding what was being said to him.
Kuroo continued. “That is the comfiest chair on campus and it’s mine. I sit here everyday. But now you’re here. In my chair. That chair.” Kuroo pointed at the chair again. “That’s my chair.”
Glasses guy looked down at the chair, lifting his arms off the arm rests and looking at both in turn. He looked back up at Kuroo and pulled one headphone away from his ear. “It’s your chair?”
Kuroo nodded.
“Is your name on it?”
Kuroo blinked. “No?”
Glasses guy gave him a tiny smirk. “Then it’s fair game.” He straightened his headphones over his ears again and returned to the textbook he had been reading before Kuroo interrupted him. The conversation was apparently over.
Kuroo stood next to the chair for a few moments longer, too stunned by this completely unexpected turn of events to do anything but stare at the other young man in disbelief. After it became clear that he was definitely not getting the chair anytime soon, he picked up his bag and made his way to the second comfiest chair on campus.
It just wasn’t the same.
"It's my chair, Kenma! I always sit there and now he's sitting there!" Kuroo flopped face first onto Kenma's bed, jostling his friend with the resulting bounce.
Kenma repositioned himself in his pillow nest in the corner of the bed. "What are you complaining about?"
"My chair!" Kuroo's muffled exclamation was full of despair. "The thing I've been texting you about all week!"
"Oh. That." Kenma gave a small shrug and left it at that. It was quiet for a few minutes while Kenma played on his phone and Kuroo slowly suffocated in the bedspread.
"Mmmffffff..."
"What."
"Mm ffrr..."
Kenma sighed through his nose. "What?"
Kuroo turned his face towards Kenma and whined, "My chair!"
Kenma extended his legs to rest on Kuroo's back, kicking him lightly. "If it's that important to you, put your name on it."
Kuroo rolled onto his back with a huff, letting Kenma's legs rest on his chest. "How? With a sharpie?"
"That's vandalism."
"Well how else would I label--" Kuroo's expression changed from one of frustration to one of glee mid-sentence. He sat up suddenly, jostling Kenma in the process and earning himself a disgusted glare. "Label! I'm a genius!"
"Whatever bad idea you just had, get it out of my room, please," Kenma grumbled at him.
Kuroo had his phone in his hand, excitedly tapping and swiping at the screen. "When have I ever had a bad idea? No, don't answer that," he amended when Kenma opened his mouth to speak. He stood up and pocketed his phone. "Regardless of the supposed 'bad-ness' of my idea, the solution to my problem will arrive in two to three business days."
"Congratulations."
Two to three business days later, a certain blond, bespectacled young man approached the chair that had become his usual study area in the last few weeks to find it unoccupied, as usual. What he didn't see was Kuroo, crouched behind a garbage can nearby, watching, waiting. He had left his class early to set his plan in motion and had been waiting patiently despite the odd looks he was attracting from passerby. The blond set his bag down on the table, took out a textbook, and then turned to sit in the chair. Just before he sat down, something about the chair seemed to catch his attention. Kuroo took this as his cue to move; leaving his trash palace, he called out a greeting as he approached.
"Well, well! Fancy seeing you here!" Kuroo said loudly. The blond jumped slightly before turning and fixing him with an irritated glare. "What brings you to my chair?"
"Your chair?"
Kuroo grinned smugly. "Why yes, my chair. See, 'Property of Kuroo Tetsurou.' Says it right there." He pointed to a white label stuck to the back of the chair.
"...You labeled the chair."
The grin on Kuroo's face grew. "Maybe."
"How old are you?" His words indicated a question but his tone said insult. Kuroo was unfazed.
"I'm a mature adult."
"Bullshit."
Kuroo gasped dramatically. "Language! Don't taint my chair with your foul mouth!"
The blond fixed him with another glare, obviously trying to hold in his irritation at Kuroo's obvious attempt to annoy him into leaving. After a moment he shoved his textbook back into his bag before slinging it over his shoulder. "Fine. you win. I'm going somewhere else." He turned and stalked away, not visibly reacting to Kuroo's call of "Toodles!" from behind him.
Several people around him were giving Kuroo strange looks, but he didn't care. He dropped his bag in the chair opposite before dropping into his chair with a happy sigh, propping his feet up on the side table between them. The comfiest chair was his once again and all was right with the world.
Until the next day when, once again, he found his chair occupied. Kuroo made eye contact with him from across the room when the blond glanced up from the notebook he had open on the table and tried to telepathically convey his rage. The blond rolled his eyes before returning to his notes. He also leaned slightly to the left, giving Kuroo a clear view of the back of the chair which was label free.
Kuroo stomped his way over and sat in the opposite chair with a huff. "You can't just go around unlabeling a person's chair. It's rude."
"I didn't unlabel it. It was gone when I got here," the other replied.
Kuroo scoffed. "Sure it was."
The blond turned a page of his notebook and paid the pout on Kuroo's face no mind. "It was probably a custodian but believe what you want. I'm not moving, though."
"...College chair etiquette dictates that we can't sit this close to each other," Kuroo pointed out. "We're not friends."
"Then go somewhere else."
"No."
"Then don't."
"I won't."
"Okay."
"Fine." Kuroo heaved a long sigh through his nose. "I guess we're study buddies now."
The blond snorted. "That's what you're going to call this situation?"
Kuroo pulled a textbook from his bag and opened it on the table between them. "That's what I'm going to call this situation."