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On a dark, starry Christmas Eve, a lone elevator shaft stood solemnly in a field of wheat. A warm breeze slipped through the wheat stalks, bending them in waves. Out of the wheat stepped Chell, a Santa hat perched on her head and a cloth sack slung over her shoulder.
She approached the elevator, adjusting her grip on the cloth sack to free up one hand. With a last glance at the stars, she pulled open the door and slipped in with the breeze.
—
Far below the wheat field, the corridors of the Aperture Science Facility were dim and silent. Though most of them were empty, one hallway close to the elevator was blocked with three turrets, standing side by side. They didn't notice Chell just around the corner, flush against the wall.
Crouching down, Chell reached into the sack. With one hand, she pulled out a portal gun; the other hand grabbed an ornament. Chell rolled the ornament quickly across the floor, catching the turrets' attention.
"What is that?"
"Is anyone there?"
With surprised exclamations, all three turrets targeted their sight lasers straight at the ornament—too distracted to see the portal gun now peeking around the corner. Chell shot under the turrets' legs, hitting the wall behind them and opening a portal with a fwoosh! A second shot at the nearby wall, and suddenly Chell was right behind the turrets. At the sound of her footsteps, their lasers started flicking around.
"Hello?"
"Is it a ghost?"
"Target missing!"
Opening the sack wide, Chell turned to the closest turret and pounced.
—
"Oh, you made it," GLaDOS said, turning to face Chell as she walked through the chamber entrance. "We just started the festivities." GLaDOS' chamber was the same as usual, a circular room with bare white walls. Over in the corner, a Christmas tree was set up, the plaque at its base reading "Aperture Science Seasonal Morale Tree". Its upper branches were currently being smothered in tinsel by P-body, who stood tip-toed on a stepladder, and Atlas, who held the ladder steady.
GLaDOS continued to talk, voice both robotic and sarcastic. "What an interesting fashion choice. You must be taking advice from Santa Claus—that explains how you managed to fit down the elevator."
Chell ignored the jab in favor of waving at the testing bots. Atlas waved back, letting go of the stepladder in the process and leaving P-body to pinwheel frantically for balance.
GLaDOS rolled her eye at the scene. "Stop bothering those two. You've already been enough of a nuisance to the turrets on your way in." Behind her, a wall panel flickered and started to display security footage. The three turrets from before stood side by side—each one was now wrapped in glowing Christmas lights, with the center turret sporting an antler headband. They whirred their motors back and forth, playing a rather pleasant rendition of We Wish You a Merry Christmas.
"I hope your reason for visiting consists of more than just harassing robots," GLaDOS said. At that, Chell started rifling through her bag in search of another present. With a triumphant smile, she held out the present for GLaDOS to see: a Santa hat to match the one Chell was wearing. The brim was lined with blue and orange ribbons.
GLaDOS squinted at it. "A tacky accessory that will collect dust in storage for eleven months of the year. How thoughtful." In spite of the dry remark, she lowered a claw from the ceiling to grab the present from Chell's hands. Gingerly, the hat was dropped on GLaDOS' head.
"I guess I'm under obligation to give a gift in return. How does dinner sound?" With a flourish, the floor panels in front of GLaDOS opened, and a banquet table rose out of the gap.
It looked like one of the office tables found in the facility's observation rooms , draped in a silky red tablecloth. The top was decked with lit candles surrounded by an overwhelming amount of food. Chell licked her lips at the sight of multiple pies and casseroles, a loaf of panettone, and a still-steaming turkey.
Chell quickly sat down opposite GLaDOS. Atlas and P-body, now finished with the tree decorations, took the seats on her left. Somehow, a companion cube had found its way to the seat on her right.
GLaDOS used a claw to push a bowl of potato salad toward Chell's plate. "I may have gone overboard with the food preparation. It turned out to be quite…cathartic," she said with a glint in her eye. The potatoes, Chell noted, were very thoroughly mashed.
"In any case, I'm sure you'll have no problem eating me out of house and home. It's almost midnight. Shall we start?"
—
The dinner was delicious. Chell took her time, piling food on her plate and savoring the taste of each bite. Though the robots couldn't eat, they entertained themselves fine. Atlas and P-body were engrossed in a conversation of chirps and beeps as they helped pass food to Chell. GLaDOS, as per usual, filled the time by talking at Chell.
She spoke about her latest testing chamber designs, and the frustrations and mishaps that resulted from overseeing an entire testing facility. As always, a few snarky comments directed at Chell snuck their way into the stories. Even after her plate was empty, Chell stayed seated a while longer, content with listening to the complaints of pesky crows and malfunctioning doors with her cheek cupped in her hand and a smile on her face.
Eventually, it was time to pack up. The candles were snuffed out, the table scraps were tossed into the closest incinerator (GLaDOS tried to drop the companion cube in along with the scraps, but Chell stopped her), and the tablecloth was folded up. Chell gave Atlas and P-body their present: two candy cane-striped flags to hang on their antennas. After excitedly donning the flags and giving Chell a couple of hugs, the two bots excused themselves, picking up the table to carry it back to whatever office it came from.
Chell turned to GLaDOS, giving her a quick hug as well. GLaDOS tolerated it for just a moment before shaking her off. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some testing to get back to. Science never stops, not even for the holidays." She tilted forward to puncuate her words. "Merry Christmas. Get out."
As Chell walked out of the chamber, she couldn't help but smile at the sight of the Santa hat still perched on GLaDOS' head.
—
Chell retraced her steps through the corridors of Aperture. She crossed paths with the three turrets again, who paused their singing to greet her.
"Merry Christmas!"
"To all a good night!"
She waved to them as she walked past. Their song resumed, filling the quiet hallway with melodic beeps and hums.
Right before the last hallway, Chell paused in front of a small vent. She took out her portal gun once more and shot through the vent grate, opening a portal to the dark maintenance room hidden inside. Chell reached into the nearly empty sack; out came a small, delicate figurine, an angel tree topper with the head replaced by a companion cube. She gently placed the figurine onto the maintenance room's desk and closed the portal. Rattmann was hard to track down, but she was confident he'd find the present sooner or later.
With the final gift given, Chell made her way to the elevator. She smiled as the elevator door closed behind her. Far above, the first streaks of sunrise landed on the wheat field, lighting the Christmas morning with a golden shine.