Chapter Text
The room was silent, once filled with beeping machines and the buzz of a breathing machine. Nurses and doctors bustling around just moments ago. So much can change in five minutes, a life could get flipped upside down with no idea which way to go next. That's how it was for Minho, his mom was gone. The only person left in his life that he cared for, the only person that ever cared for him so deeply he never even thought about what it would be like without her. He thought he had so much more time left but, his mom's body had other plans.
Heart attacks are so quick and life ruining, some can be saved but, his mom wasn't one of the lucky ones.
He'd watched while frozen still in the corner of the small and cramped hospital room as doctors and nurses pushed by him. They did everything they could to bring his mom back after her heart stopped for the second time that night. Her body was too weak to pick up on the electric shock one of the doctors had applied to her chest several times already.
After the third shock their time was running out, she wasn't coming back. That was proven after the fourth and final one the doctor pressed onto her. The monitor continued on the flatline, no trace of any heart rhythm.
Minho's thoughts were drowned out along with the voices of the doctors and nurses around him. This had to be some sick and twisted dream or nightmare that he'd wake from any minute now. This couldn't be real, his mom was sleeping just in the room next to his in their shared apartment. They'd wake in the morning and go to the cafe they went to every morning, order their coffee and croissants. Walk around the small city they lived in before Minho went off to work at the small flower shop he's had a job at since he was sixteen.
He wasn't actually in the hospital being escorted back to the waiting room. His mom's body wasn't being moved to the morgue and he definitely wasn't gonna be asked about funeral arrangements and what he wanted to do. He had no answers or anyone to go to for those. This wasn't real.
One of the nurses pressed a cold cup of water into Minho's hand as she sat him in a chair. His brain barely registered the condensation wetting his hands as he held it. He felt a faint touch on his shoulder, she had said something before she walked away but, it sounded like he was underwater. His body felt numb, like he wasn't there, like none of this could be real but, it was. He didn't want to believe it though, he couldn't.
A painful sob wracked his body so suddenly sending him keeling over his legs. Minho can't remember the last time he'd cried because he had nothing to cry about. He and his mom lived in a beautiful two bedroom apartment in a nice part of the small city they were from. The money his mom got from her disability was just enough to pay for it and Minho worked part time to afford their extras like groceries and wifi or anything they needed.
They lived a quiet and happy life that Minho definitely had taken for granted. He'd never expected to be sitting in the waiting room of a hospital at two o'clock in the morning sobbing so hard to the point his throat was hurting and he might've been drooling a little bit. He really didn't care that there were three to four other people also in the waiting room probably staring at him with such pity in their eyes.
The sobs kept coming like there was no end, his hands were shaking so bad the cup of water had dripped onto his legs but, he could barely register the moisture seeping through the fabric.
Suddenly someone was standing in front of him removing the shaking cup from his hand and taking the seat next to him. The stranger squeezed his shoulder rubbing his gentle thumb over the fabric of Minho's sweater. His hand found its way across his back to his other arm, that hand then pulled him closer to the kind person comforting him in this moment.
Minho let his head rest on the strangers shoulder, he felt so weak, the sobs drew every last bit of energy from him. He was left with very staggered breaths and a snot filled nose that was definitely making its way out and onto his upper lip. His face was wet, eyes bloodshot, he was a mess. The man next to him rubbed over his arm until Minho's breathing evened out and tears finally stopped spilling onto his cheeks.
"Thank you." Minho said with his head still on the shoulder of this stranger. He was unsure if the stranger had heard him, his voice was hoarse from the violent sobbing he'd just done.
"Don't thank me." The stranger said still holding Minho close. "Do you have anyone here with you?" he asked. Minho felt this strangers head moving, probably looking around the waiting room to see if anyone would come claim him as theres.
Minho didn't respond because it felt embarrassing having absolutely no one but, that was the only question he knew the answer to. He was still so unsure how he was gonna get through all of this alone, his mom was his best friend and always had the answer to everything. How was he supposed to afford her funeral, how was he gonna have a funeral with no one to invite, how he was gonna afford his apartment, how was he gonna find a new job that payed more in time of rent being due. He was so overwhelmed.
The tears came back as he sobbed turning his face into this strangers body now. He was probably gonna be embarrassed about this at some point but, right now this is what he needed, someone to hold him, tell him everything's gonna be ok even if he didn't know this guys name. The stranger wrapped his other arm around him trying his best not to spill the water as Minho's back shook with more sobs.
The nurse eventually came back and Minho had to let go of this stranger, his hands never left Minhos shoulder though.
"So we're gonna need you to answer a few questions for us. Could you follow me?" The nurse kindly and softly asked.
Minho didn't want to face this alone, it was gonna be impossible to get through all these questions with his cries. His mind wasn't really in the right place to be answering questions, he couldn't even answer the nurses question she'd just asked 'could you follow me'. The person next to him decided to answer for him.
"Yes we can." He said standing Minho up with the hand he'd slipped down his shoulder to his hand. Minho felt so weak as he stood on wobbly legs, he could barely walk as the nurse led the two through the double doors and down a long hallway.
"I'm Jisung by the way." Jisung said, his hand still in Minhos.
Minho sniffled in and this was the first time he'd gotten a good look at Jisung since his eyes had been blurred with tears or his face was buried in Jisung's hoodie. He was a little shorter than Minho, skinny, and he had the smallest sympathetic smile pressed across his face. His eyes were big, round and brown and a little glossy, maybe he'd shed a few tears while comforting Minho, he couldn't really tell.
Minho used his free hand to wipe a tear that had fallen as he looked down, away from Jisung "I'm Minho." he said quietly.
"Minho." he said softly. He gave his hand a reassuring squeeze as the nurse turned into one of the small rooms off to the side of the long hallway.
He'd let go of Minho's hand as they sat in the two chairs that were slightly apart from each other in front of the desk the nurse was sat at.
"I know this is a lot right now and there's gonna be a lot of questions so, do your best to answer them." The nurse smiled small at him. She was very sweet but this was the last thing Minho wanted to be doing, he couldn't form proper thoughts in his head from the exhaustion, sobbing and everything that had gone on in the past twelve hours. But, he 'had to do his best' so, he nodded at her and she began.
She looked down at one of the multiple pieces of paper she had on a clipboard "Is there anyone else we need to notify about this death?" she looked at Minho, he shook his head while playing with sleeve of his sweater in his lap.
She scribbled something onto the paper, "Is there another family member or friend authorized to help in decision making?" Minho shook his head and the tears started pushing at the back of his eyes again. He blinked rapidly trying to keep them away as the nurse scribbled something else down.
"Is there a funeral home chosen to transport her body to?" She asked and Minho shook his head again, this time squeezing his eyes shut as those tears were making an appearance again. His head fell into his hands, a sob left his mouth for the hundredth time that night. This was all too much.
"Do you know what you'd like to do with her body in the mean time?" She asked gently.
Minho couldn't answer not even shake his head, this was way too much. A loud overwhelming sob overtook him.
"I know this is so hard but, I need you to answer these questions." The nurse said.
"Give him a minute." Jisung said defensively. He stood up and walked next to Minho. His hand glided gently over his back as Minho continued to cry. "Can we come back tomorrow?" he asked the nurse.
"Oh uh, I'd have to ask the doctor." she said unsure.
"Could you please?" Jisung asked crouching next to Minho now.
The nurse left the room leaving the two. Jisung was holding onto Minho's knee moving his thumb over his jeans. "Do you have somewhere to go?" Jisung asked.
Minho did but, he wasn't sure if he wanted to go back to his apartment where all of his mom's things were. Her crochet basket would be in the spot she sat in on the couch that morning, along with the novel she was reading at the moment. 'The Phone Booth at the Edge of the World'.
The broken mug of tea would still be in the kitchen where his mom had collapsed that afternoon before he was supposed to go to work. He hadn't had any time to clean the mess before rushing her to the hospital
He knew he wouldn't be able to handle that all right now in his state. There was also no way he'd be able to drive himself.
"I do." Minho sniffled "But, I can't go back there right now." he said, his voice was constricted as a small cry left his mouth.
Jisung stood up and pulled his chair over next to Minho's "I don't know if you're comfortable with it but, I can see if my roommate is alright with you staying over." he said still rubbing his hand over Minhos back.
Minho was honestly so confused with this guys kindness. Why was he being so nice to someone he'd just met, offering him to stay over his house without even barely knowing Minho's story or what was going on. It was a little suspicious at first but, with Minhos grief and exhaustion filled mind, he had to accept the help being handed to him. He'd never had friends growing up so, maybe it was time to make some, if that was even possible. If Jisung even wanted to be his friend.
He accepted Jisungs help, he moved his hand to his pocket and removed his phone from it. For a good minute or two he texted his roommate, it seemed like they were back and forth, multiple messages sending and coming through. Minho sat there resting his head in his hand staring at the floor. Everything still felt unreal, like he was floating somewhere in a land far from earth. His body was numb and all he could feel was hurt deep in his chest. His mom was really gone.
Jisung eventually clicked his phone off returning it to his pocket. "Ok, he said it's alright." Jisung sat up again returning his hand to Minhos knee.
"Thank you." Minho said.
Jisung gave him a small smile still rubbing his thumb over Minhos jeans.
The nurse returned to the doorway "The doctor is alright with you coming back tomorrow." she said. "So, you're ok to leave then."
"Ok thank you." Jisung said as they both watched her leave. He helped Minho out of the chair and threw an arm around him to help him walk. He probably knew Minhos body was weak from the sobbing and mentally draining night he'd had. Minho couldn't be more grateful for Jisung, this such caring stranger that happened to be in the right place at the right time.
They neared the waiting room and pushed back through the double doors. "My roommate should be here in ten minutes." Jisung said walking the two outside.
The night was warm and humid as it was the middle of June. They took a seat on the bench outside the hospital to wait. Jisung sat pressed against him but, Minho wasn't really bothered by it, the comfort was nice and what he needed right now.
"So, why are you here?" Minho asked quietly as he stared off across the street at some random store front.
"I work here at the daycare, we offer a 24/ care service for patients and staff." Jisung explained.
Minho hummed in understanding. "Why did you help me?" he asked. It sounded like he was interrogating him but, he was just genuinely curious.
"I don't like seeing other people sad." Jisung said looking at him now. "No one was helping you and I couldn't stand seeing someone hurting so bad without comfort."
Jisung was a rare person to come across, especially these days when everyone is so cold and quick to judge. Minho could practically feel the love radiating off of Jisung, he had so much to give, he could just tell. He didn't expect anyone in the waiting room to comfort but, those other people, the way they stared at him couldn't have been in a nice way.
"I'm really grateful." Minho sniffed in, he felt like he was gonna cry again.
"You know, I usually wait out here for my roommate to pick me up but, today I decided to sit in there because it felt like something told me to. I think you might be the reason." Jisung said bringing an arm around Minho after he'd noticed a tear fall from his eye again.
Minho rested his head on Jisung's shoulder and didn't say anything further. He was glad Jisung wasn't asking any questions at the moment or being more curious about what had happened. He probably had an idea from the few questions Minho answered in that room but, there was definitely more explaining to do when he had the mentality to.
For now though he was accepting Jisungs comfort as they continued waiting on this bench. He was really thinking about what Jisung said, he usually waits out here for his roommate but, randomly decided to sit in the waiting room that night. Minho didn't really believe in coincidences but, this had to be one. Maybe the universe put Jisung in the waiting room to find Minho because it just knew Minho needed someone.
He felt silly thinking this, his sleep deprived brain was coming up with stuff that probably would sound so laughable to anyone he told.
He ended up shutting his eyes letting the warm air of the outside consume him and for the first time that night, his thoughts slowed and calmness overtook him. He was seconds away from sleep until the sound of tires rolling up on the concrete got closer to the two.
"Hey, Minho my roommates here." Jisung gently made him aware. Minho opened his eyes instantly wanting to shut them again, he was so tired and Jisung was so comfy.
"Ok." Minho softly spoke emitting his tiredness just from the tone of his voice.
Jisung stood pulling Minho up with him taking his hand in his again. They slowly walked to the car, Minhos feet felt heavy every step more draining than the last. It was a miracle when they reached the door and Jisung pulled open the rear passenger side. He helped Minho sit down in the seat but, he didn't move. Minho assumed he'd sit in the front with his friend but, he looked at Minho as if he was waiting for him to scoot over. Minho slid himself over into the middle seat and watched Jisung climb into the back right next to him.
"Hi Hyunjin." Jisung said as he helped Minho buckle in his seat belt before clicking in his own.
"Hi" Hyunjin replied with a smile.
Minho could see him from the rear view mirror. He also seemed like a such a nice person but, Minho was too tired to make anymore assumptions for the night. Though he was a little nervous to be heading to two random strangers apartment, he really felt like he had no other choice at the moment. He was alone, he had somewhere to go but, couldn't bring himself to and he just needed someone to be there for him. Someone to hold him and that's exactly what Jisung was good at apparently.
He hadn't wasted a moment to wrap his arm around Minho, he lightly pushed at his head to rest onto his shoulder and Minho's brain went blank again. His thoughts flew away as he shut his eyes trying not to let sleep consume them. He heard Hyunjin ask for Minhos name to which Jisung thankfully replied for him knowing he was far too tired and mentally exhausted to answer on his own.
"It's ok, you can sleep." Jisung said rubbing his other hand down Minhos thigh. "We have a little bit of a drive." he added.
Minho really felt like someone sent Jisung directly to him, it was like Jisung could read his thoughts because he was trying his hardest to keep his eyes open and not fall asleep on this strangers shoulder. But, with Jisung's words of approval his mind went blank and he didn't have to think anymore. Though his sleep was broken, he only focused on Jisung's fingers that squeezed at his shoulder every so often. His hand ran down his arm pulling him closer when it felt like Minho was moving away with the jolt of the car when Hyunjin turned. Minho felt so safe with this stranger it almost felt natural for him to be there in his arms.
The rest of the drive felt like a blur as his sleep had finally become steady and he was passed out cold on Jisung's shoulder. He woke to Jisungs fingers in his hair scratching at the side of his head. Minho sucked in a slight deep breath as he opened his eyes. He sat up off Jisung's shoulder, squinting his eyes and looking around a little feeling confused.
"It's ok, we're just at our house." Jisung smiled at him and Minho relaxed. Their apartment seemed to be on the outskirts of the small city, a quiet neighborhood.
Minho followed Jisung as he got out of the car. Upon a closer look their apartment seemed to be more like a townhouse because they were in a driveway and the house was two stories. A lot nicer than Minho had thought.
As he looked around the dark street a little, Jisungs hand somehow always found its way in Minhos, he led him up the walkway that extended off their driveway and up to their front door. Minho and Jisung scooted aside to let Hyunjin in front of the door to unlock it. He pulled out his keys shuffling through a few clanking together until he found the right one. He pushed the key in unlocking the door.
They stepped in after Hyunjin, the house was dark until Jisung switched on a light illuminating the entry way. Their house was really nice, modern and updated from what Minho could see. It was very clean and smelled of fresh laundry, a very comforting smell that reminded him of Sundays with his mom. He had a feeling a lot of things were gonna be reminding of his mom.
Minho kicked off his shoes after noticing the other two doing so and moved them nicely together.
"Are you hungry?" Jisung asked, his hand was still holding Minhos so tight but so gently.
Minho really hadn't thought about eating since he'd arrived at the hospital that afternoon. He hadn't eaten since his croissant and coffee with his mom that morning. He really should put something in his body and he was feeling slightly more energized from the small power nap on the ride here.
Minho nodded "A little." he said, Jisung pulled him along to their kitchen. He pulled out a stool from the kitchen island for Minho to sit in. Their kitchen was just as clean as the part of the house Minho had seen, not much decoration but, it seemed like the two worked a lot and maybe didn't spend too much time here. Hyunjin opened the fridge and pulled out something that looked like leftovers, he dumped it onto a plate and popped it into the microwave before leaving the kitchen. Minho got the sense that Hyunjin was a quiet, maybe shy kind of person.
"So, we don't really know how to cook." Han said standing across from Minho now. "We have ramen, cereal, microwave dinners. Any of those sound appetizing to you?" he asked.
Minho wasn't really sure what he wanted, he wasn't too hungry but, ramen was sounding a little appetizing to him at the moment. "Ramen is ok." he said quietly.
"Ok." Jisung smiled, Minho watched him grab a bowl and a packet of ramen from the cabinet. He looked so happy to be making Minho food and helping him it almost brought a small smile to Minhos face. Then he remembered the only reason Jisung was helping him and why he was here, his thoughts overtook his brain again.
The memories flooded his thoughts of his mom's lifeless body being shocked endlessly by the doctors and nurses trying to save her. He wished he'd left the room when the doctor asked if he wanted to but, he so stupidly stayed. He has to live with these memories now. His eyes couldn't spare him as tears pooled in them again. He tried his best to wipe them away before Jisung turned around from the sink and saw but, it was useless, they weren't gonna stop. He felt so embarrassed having to constantly be comforted by someone he'd just met as Jisung turned and looked at him so sympathetically.
Jisung didn't waste a moment before putting the bowl of ramen down and immediately circled the counter hugging Minho from behind. This was the first proper hug Jisung gave him with both arms squeezing him so tight. Minho silently cried, shoulders shaking as Jisung held him. Another few moments and Jisung was spinning the stool around hugging him from the front now. This hug felt so much more comforting as Minho melted into it letting Jisung's arms consume his whole body.
This only lasted a few moments until the microwave beeped and Hyunjin entered back into the kitchen a few seconds later to grab his food. Jisung let go of Minho with a comforting squeeze to the shoulder and brought himself back around the counter. Hyunjin left with a goodnight to the two and took his food with him, to his room Minho assumed.
Jisung threw the bowl of ramen into the microwave and cleaned a bit of water he'd spilled onto the stove just below it. Minho looked into his lap, picking at his fingers to distract himself from crying again.
"You ok?" Jisung asked, Minho looked up at him again. "Well wait, obviously you're not ok but." Jisung paused. "Nevermind." he said.
Minho actually smiled the slightest bit at Jisung, he knew he was only trying to help. The effort was there and really cute to Minho, he really didn't know why it felt like that. "I think i'll be ok, eventually." Minho was able to say.
"Yea, that's usually how grief works. It just gets smaller but, never really disappears." Jisung said softly. "Not to sound too depressing or anything". he added.
"I don't think anything can get more depressing than this." Minho said, he looked down at his hands again.
The microwaved beeped eventually and Jisung poured in the flavoring packet for him, stirred it in and set a pair of chopsticks in the bowl. He slid the bowl on the counter as he took the seat next to Minho and pushed the bowl fully over in front of him.
Minho picked the chopsticks up along with some noodles and slurped some up. It had been a long time since he'd been up eating ramen at almost four o'clock in the morning. He was sure it was when he was sick two years ago and hadn't eaten anything in almost three days and needed to get something in his stomach.
Half way through the bowl Minho realized Jisung wasn't eating anything himself but instead watching Minho so intently with a small smile that never left his face. Jisung was really cute and Minho hadn't really gotten the chance to look at him fully besides in the hospital when they walked to that room. Minho had always been looking down, away or his eyes were full of tears. He took this moment though to look at Jisung. He turned his head slightly and just like Minho had seen before he had the biggest brown eyes, his cheeks were so round they looked squishy and his hair was this ginger color, slightly curly.
Minho didn't get to look long because Jisung turned his head and looked down at his hands folded on the counter. He watched him move one of them to play with his ear that was blushing red.
"Are you gonna eat?" Minho asked curiously.
"Yea, eventually." Jisung answered with a smile looking at Minho again.
Minho nodded back at him slightly before finishing up the bowl of noodles. There was no room in his stomach left for the broth in the bowl after the large serving. Jisung eventually noticed he'd finished and grabbed the bowl from him in front of him. He stood and poured the rest out into the sink, rinsed it out and placed the bowl in the dishwasher.
Minho was feeling so tired again, mostly from everything he'd been through and all the thoughts his brain was feeding him when he had a chance to think. Half of it was probably from all the noodles he'd just scoffed down after not eating all day but, that lack of sleep was definitely catching up to him. He never stayed up this late.
Jisung must've noticed Minhos drowsy eyes after he'd turned around from shutting the dishwasher because he circled back round the counter and placed his hand on Minhos back.
"You ready to sleep?" Jisung asked quietly.
Minho could only nod because he was so tired and ready to sleep. It's all he wanted at the moment, he could probably pass out right there on the counter if he put his head down.
Jisung helped him off the stool and pushed it in after Minho stood. He hooked his arm around Minhos to guide him back down the hallway to their entry way where the staircase was. He slipped his hand down Minhos arm to his hand since there wasn't enough space to walk up the steps side by side. He led Minho up them taking it slow because of how drained he knew Minho was and then down the upstairs hallway.
They stopped in front of a door that Jisung turned the handle to and pushed open. He flicked on the light and the room was very cozy, a full size bed placed in the corner of the room with some floral comforter and soft decorative pillows. A dresser with a large tv hung on the wall above it, the curtains were a sheer white with blinds that were drawn half way on two smaller windows. Then the smell was one that was so comforting almost mind relaxing, maybe a lavender with a hint of vanilla scent. All Minho knew was he was definitely going to enjoy the sleep in here.
Jisung walked further into the room to shut the half drawn blinds while Minho kind of lingered in the middle of the room behind him.
"Sorry about the floral sheets, that was Hyunjin's idea. He decorated in here." Jisung giggled a little.
Minho looked around a bit more "It's ok it's very nice in here." he said while Jisung started closing the curtains now.
Jisung turned around after sliding the last curtain shut and sort of looked Minho up and down, his eyes lingered a moment before meeting Minhos.
"U-uh clothes." Jisung stuttered out, "Let me get you clothes." he said touching his ear again. He quickly walked past Minho and out of the room. For the second time that night he'd made Minho smile just a little bit with his shy but so loving personality.
Jisung retuned shortly after with a graphic band tee and some grey sweatpants for Minho to put on. "Here you go." He said handing them over to Minho who was still lingering in the middle of the room.
"Thank you." Minho said grabbing the clothes from Jisung. He held them at his side as he watched Jisung slowly back out of the room.
"It's no problem." Jisung smiled. "My room is right here, if you need anything just let me know." he said pointing at the door directly across from the room Minho was staying in. "Bathroom is just down the hall too, goodnight." Jisung shut the door.
"Goodnight." Minho quietly spoke out before the door was shut all the way with a click. He stood there for a moment longer before removing his sweater that was starting to itch and his jeans that were just too tight, squeezing him so uncomfortably. The cool air on his bare skin felt so nice he had to shut his eyes to take it in for a moment.
He could definitely fall asleep standing there so, he had to quickly put on the clothes before he actually did. The tee was slightly oversized falling nicely over his toned body and the sweatpants Jisung had given him were lined with fleece inside. Minho was so comfy now, he took himself over to the wall and flicked off the light giving his eyes a moment to adjust to the dark room.
Once they eventually did the room was slightly illuminated by one of the lampposts outside on the street. He walked over to the bed, pushed the few decorative pillows over and grabbed the edge of the blanket to untuck it from where it was so nicely made.
He got himself under the covers, the cool sheets sent a shiver through his body. He was so cozy as he brought the comforter up to his shoulders that smelt like lavender too, kind of fitting for the floral print. Oh so soothing too as the scent reminded him of his own apartment. It filled his nose and he was finally drifting off to sleep.