Work Text:
"W-Wait!"
"Trust me, partner! I got this!"
Jax holds his hand out as she runs off, not used to feeling this tired and vulnerable before. It was terrifying.
The countless bullets that went through him were way more painful than he had imagined, and the absence of Pomni only made them feel more prominent.
But her smile, and evil--albeit cringe persona was so endearing, and watching Pomni let loose after spending her first days here being nervous was so interesting, but it also made Jax feel all warm inside.
So Jax let her run off, allowing himself to relax. The doors of the abstracted stared down at him, but he didn't let himself look back at them, lost in thought as he stares at the floor.
Do you have any friends?
Not anymore...
The twist in Jax's stomach returned with that conversation that occurred a few adventures ago. If Jax looked up, he could likely find the door of his old friend, but he doesn't want this twisted feeling to grow with that warm feeling that... he hasn't felt in a long while.
The feeling of having fun in the circus, but with someone else.
Pomni doesn't berate Jax for having fun, unlike Ragatha, even if she doesn't particularly approve of the more malicious ones.
Pomni doesn't have to be pushed around like Gangle, either, which was great for Jax, because she was now hanging out a lot more with Zooble, who, unlike Pomni, is too much of a grouch to even care about the concept of having fun in the circus.
Kinger was just insane, so there's that, even though Pomni did mention that she had a great time with him once. Must be some weird form of sarcasm, gotta be.
Pomni, she was different from the rest, but also similar from someone Jax hadn't seen in a long time.
But he kept staring at the floor, retaining this warm feeling. Why was he doing that? He can't come on to her like this, he's supposed to be funny. What's so funny about a straight couple?
Jax stares back up at the ceiling, still feeling a great sense of pain, but his thoughts about Pomni ease him like a soft cloud, not necessarily touchable, but still soothing.
If Jax was going to spend his time in the new circus with this new clown, he was going to make the most out of it, so long as he's still the funny one.
But he felt like darker times were yet to come, as if these soft clouds will eventually turn into a storm.
--
"We did it! We make such a good team!"
The hug caught Jax extremely off guard. He swore that Pomni wasn't comfortable with touch, so why was she the one initiating it to him instead of anyone else?
He had the urge to push her away, but a part of him didn't. He couldn't let these soft, warm clouds drift away, even though he can feel them blurring his mental vision like fog.
But he looked down at her anyways, and he had never seen her this happy.
She's too happy in this circus. You're supposed to make her suffer. You find joy in that, don't you?
What's your archetype, then? The villain?
"Jax? Jax?"
It turned out that Jax was so lost in thought, he had missed out on Pomni's monologue about how one of them has to betray the other. Jax wanted to tell her to just betray him, so he doesn't have to deal with these new, yet familiar, mixed emotions. But instead, he played in on her little game, with both of them running around, trying to shoot one another.
Jax had to admit, Pomni has been getting way more confident with her shooting ever since he had told her to let loose. He had to start relying on his lanky body to dodge her bullets, all while he had to shoot her.
He will never admit this to anyone, but he purposefully missed a few of his bullets, just to mess with Pomni. Yeah, that's why he would miss. Even though the brief memory of that one shot that was supposed to hit Kinger stung him every time it passed by his mind.
Eventually, they were both on the floor exhausted, and out of ammo. Jax was breathing hard, not used to having this much strain on his body. It almost reminded him that he was human.
"Whew, that was the most energy I've put in an adventure," Pomni said, also breathing hard.
"Me too..." Jax groans. "And I didn't even win."
Pomni sits up to look at him. "Well, I didn't win either, if that makes you feel any better." She reassures with a small smile.
"Then I suppose it's a draw." Jax states monotonously, too exhausted to come up with any sort of funny response.
"Or..." Pomni trails off in a rising tone. "We can both be winners," She then stands up, lending Jax a hand. "We were helping each other out the most, anyways." She says with a smile.
Jax gets up, once again trying not to think too much about how Pomni is just ok with touch when it comes to him, of all circus members.
"Now come on, let's go see who the favorite character is. Maybe it'll be the both of us!" Pomni says excitedly.
"Not if I leave without you!" Jax says with his trademark grin, using all the energy he can to run off to wherever.
"Jax!" Pomni shouts, but he could hear her smiling behind that shout, no matter how far he ran.
Jax couldn't care whatsoever about the Favorite Character Awards, but he couldn't help but care about how happy Pomni looked, and how she would care about the both of them winning something a second time.
Jax couldn't help but care about Pomni, and that was terrifying for him.
--
"Ladies and gentlemen, it's time for the favorite character awards!"
Jax and Pomni were seated in the back, both still too exhausted to bother walking any further. Pomni looked like she was ready to fall asleep at any moment, and Jax wanted to feel like that, as well.
However, these feelings that have been stirring inside of Jax have are still present, and he feels like they could erupt out at any moment.
Thoughts manifested into him as to how they could erupt. Maybe he would push her away after she hugged him. Maybe he would blurt out that he doesn't actually care about her. Maybe he would shove her out of his arm that she started sleeping on.
Wait, what?!
Lost in his thoughts again, Jax didn't notice that Pomni drifted off into sleep, her head on Jax's arm. Jax felt his face warming up. This was all too much, and Jax swore he felt that stirring feeling about to come up. Must be a fever, even though there is no such thing as one here, unless Caine wanted to randomly add something as mundane as common diseases.
With his shaky arms and hands, Jax gently straightens Pomni back to her seat, without waking her up. Even though his intense thoughts were telling him to do the opposite.
His refusal to follow them only made the tumultuous feeling inside of him worsen, as Jax immediately rushed to the bathroom, still going as quietly as possible to not cause a scene.
His ears were ringing by the time he made it inside, his pupils squiggling around as he tries to get through a stall. His breaths were only increasing rapidly, as he knew what he would have to do in order to stop these pounding feelings.
Jax gets into one of the stalls, gravity overtaking him as his knees pound onto the bathroom tiles. His head yanks down towards the toilet seat his hands are gripped onto, and intensely vomits out some vague substance.
It was quick, but painful. Not physically, but emotionally, as all the warm feelings about Pomni and his thoughts that beg to leave that warmth strike each and every heave, his drooping ears only ringing louder.
Vomiting out stressful thoughts didn't help Jax get out of his stressful state, however. If anything, it only created new ones as he stares at that black, iridescent substance.
It looked all too familiar to those who had abstracted, the reflection dancing around Jax's flawed vision as if they were the multicolored eyes he was all too familiar with seeing.
Jax isn't on the way to abstracting, is he? The thought of his entire body convulsing into a spiky, black mass with protruding, multicolored eyes only made his skin crawl. Not realizing how much he is hyperventilating, Jax feels like the panels of the stalls are getting closer and closer towards him.
It wasn't until far later into his panic attack that he realizes that Pomni threw up like this too, and she didn't abstract. This weird substance is just what comes out when players throw up. Jax stares at his pathetic expression in the reflection of the toilet, unable to clearly see himself due to the whiteness of the seat.
He didn't need to see himself clearly to know how stupid he looked, remaining vomit seeping through his teeth.
Jax slumped himself backwards to lay down, his head shoving open the stall door before it slams onto the cold, tiled floor. That damned red mannequin was about to walk above him, only for him to comically disappear, reminding Jax that even though what had just happened to him felt very human, he is confined to this silly, artificial cartoon of a world.
He hates every second of feeling human, and yet he lets himself be friends with Pomni, despite her giving him these enjoyable, yet dreadful feelings of humanity that he hasn't felt in ages.
But right now, Jax couldn't feel anything if he tried. Maybe that's just what he needs after this emotional roller coaster of a day. Being a cartoon archetype was loads easier than being human.
Even though, and he refuses to admit this to himself, it's getting harder to just be the archetype, as well.
--
"Oh, wait, I misread that. It's Ming."
Jax happened to have stayed in the bathroom for the entire awards show, the winner being some irrelevant NPC.
He walked out of the bathroom, wiping any remaining vomit off of his mouth. He tried to bring back his default smiling face, but he was still so exhausted, his eyelids drooping with the frown on his face.
As Jax makes his way back to his seat, he realizes that Pomni is still asleep. He lightly slaps Pomni on the cheek to wake her up, but she is still fast asleep.
Just slap her all the way, it'll be funny.
That archetypal side of Jax loves that idea, imagining a freaked out Pomni, who is angry at him, but this time, Jax dreads the idea of seeing that side of Pomni, almost like if he did do that, it would feel personal.
Jax heaves a big sigh as he has to pick her up to take her to her room. He could just take her to Ragatha, but then she would probably convince Pomni to not end up "corrupted" by him or whatever crap she was spewing about back there.
Think of the devil, and she shall appear, because Jax saw Ragatha in the corner of his vision, walking over to talk to him.
"H-hey, Jax?" Ragatha says timidly.
"I'm not gonna throw her or anything. I'm just taking her to her room." Jax says exhaustively, his exasperation pouring through his words.
"Oh, no, I wasn't gonna talk to you about..." Ragatha pauses, and then takes a sigh.
"Look, I'm sorry for assuming that you were going to 'corrupt' Pomni. I should've trusted that she can think for herself."
Is this an apology for Jax or an apology for Pomni?
Jax was just gonna continue walking away, ignoring her, but then she says something else that catches him off guard.
"...I shouldn't have given up on you, too. I don't agree with the things you do that involve hurting others, but... maybe... you need a friend like Pomni. Especially after, well..." Ragatha stops her rather hesitant talking, knowing that Jax knows exactly what she's talking about.
Amidst this new thick atmosphere, Ragatha gives Jax her typical, cheerful words, even though they sounded way more melancholy in this context: "Just know that, it gets better."
Jax look at Ragatha's pitiful expression, and then walks away, only responding to her in his head.
Does it ever?
--
"..."
Silence passes through Jax's room as he slowly wakes up. His body is still tired from all of the running and puking, but he manages to get up to start the same old day, with the same personality and smile plastered onto his face.
The day won't really be the same, though. There are many shenanigans that him and Pomni can get up to. Maybe he'll actually find out what kind of archetype Pomni is supposed to be.
However, when Jax makes it to the main area, all of the other players are there, except Pomni.
A slight chill runs up his spine, thoughts already forming as to what could have happened to her. Jax runs to her door, hoping that no one else in the circus has noticed him doing so.
Sure enough, Pomni's door still demonstrated her face, no red X on it whatsoever. Not like Jax was worried about that or anything, he knew she would be fine. But it wouldn't hurt to double check.
Jax whips out Pomni's key, and opens the door slowly, almost as if he's afraid of what he will see on the other side. Almost like it isn't the first time Jax has woken up, finding out that a certain friend of his wasn't at the main area, like everyone else.
At least this time, the door isn't locked...
All Jax saw was Pomni in bed, her back turned against him. She very much could be asleep, but something inside Jax stops him from going inside of her room to check. Since when was he one to care about the privacy of others? He did break into her room with her key.
She's just asleep, she'll wake up soon...
That's what Jax tells himself as he closes the door to head back to the main area.
Jax spends a few minutes standing at the main area, with no one talking to him. Usually he would poke someone around, or set them off verbally, but there was too much on his mind for him to think of anything.
He hadn't realized how alone he was when he didn't do any of these things.
Somehow, Jax ended up back at Pomni's door, checking again to see if she's ok, and sure enough, she is in that similar position, still laid down in bed.
She's probably still asleep, you don't have to wake her up...
Wouldn't it be funny if you did, though?
Jax groans and heads back to the main area, wondering why he's been wasting his morning like this.
"How's Pomni doing?" Ragatha asks, the moment Jax returns, revealing that she's been watching him the whole time.
"Eh, she decided to take a snooze, must be bored already knowing she's gonna win the next adventure." Jax responds in a snarky tone, even though a part of him still worries that there's more going on.
Maybe he should just check again, one more time.
"Can you wake up Pomni?" Zooble asks abruptly, causing Jax to flinch because he did not notice how they were right in front of him. "Caine's been rambling about this 'favorite new adventure', and he sounds a lot more... frantic than usual. I just want to get this day over with."
"Why don't you do it, Zoobie?" Jax asks with his shit-eating grin. "Afraid you'll get knocked out again?"
"You were already on your way to her door for the fifth f[%$!#]ing time this morning." Zooble responds bluntly.
Jax gets caught off guard by that response. He swore he only checked once or twice. Zooble just looks at him with that blank, irritated expression, all while Jax's own expression felt like it was moments away from slipping into desperation.
He ends up at Pomni's door, once again. Maybe he'll sing that Daisy Bell song, and she would respond back.
That would be cute-- I mean funny.
Since when did you have such lame thoughts!?
Jax just goes through the door, not wanting to deal with these conflicting thoughts for another day. He sneaks through the other side of the bedroom to check if Pomni is asleep, even though he knows damn well that she is.
Sure enough, Pomni's eyes were closed, but she did stir a little bit, and her eyes slowly flickered open, humming a little.
"hmmnnng... JAX?!" Pomni jumps, startled at the sudden sight of him. "How long were you in here?!"
Shitshitshitshitshit-- "What? Can't handle my irresistible presence for a whole night?"
"You did not stand here watching me sleep for a whole night, I don't believe it." Pomni says sternly. It was fun seeing this feisty side to her, but it also hurt at the same time, almost as if he's capable of being afraid of hurting her feelings.
"Guilty as charged," Jax admits. "Apparently Caine's got some sort of new adventure planned out for us, but I have a feeling that we'd be bored out of our minds, since we won the last adventure so well." He brags with his smug grin.
"Well, I'd love for us to go on an adventure together again," Jax feels his face heat up to that. What the fuck is up with him? "But I haven't had a sleep like this in forever, so maybe, we could take the day off?"
Jax comically stretches his arms out as he responds: "Ach, yeah, that wouldn't be a bad idea. We can spare everyone else of our violence for one day."
Pomni chuckles at that. "More like your violence. I'll go back to being a true neutral. Or maybe I could be a chaotic good in the next adventure..." Pomni yawns, stretching her arms out. "I'm gonna spend the rest of the day sleeping. I haven't felt this cozy when I got here until now."
"Alright, you do that. I'll go ahead and tell Caine that we got the winner's pass."
"Is that even a thing here?" Pomni mumbles as she's ready to drift back into her slumber.
"Nah, but I can probably trick him into thinking that it's a thing."
"Mmm, ok. Good luck with that." Pomni says, attempting to sound endearing, but she was well on her way to being fast asleep again.
Jax slides out of her room as quick as he can, because if he had to look at a sleepy Pomni, he wouldn't be able to handle his flustered emotions, and he does not want the same events of last night to happen again.
He was able to find Caine pretty easily, since he was at the side of the main area pacing all over the place, quickly spawning all sorts of assets only to make them vanish in place of new ones. Jax could swear he felt a tingly, glitchy feeling around the little tornado Caine was creating.
"Hey Caine, looking for Pomni?" Jax yells out to him.
"Hello there Jax, I'm looking for the people who VOTED AGAINSTM E--
"Why yes, I have been! Where is she? I'm sure today's adventure will be her favorite, and everyone else's!"
Jax tries not to process whatever that was to keep up his facade. "Oh, well, since we did such a great job at our last adventure, we decided to take the day off, since we'd be so bored with doing a good job with whatever today's adventure is." He boasts.
"That sounds like BUL LSH-- a great idea, but trust me when I say that you won't be bored with this one!"
"Oh, Caine, don't you worry about you and your adventure," Jax grins. "You did such a great job with creating that last adventure we had, so what better way then to have some sort of award for winning it?" He argues.
"YOU WERE THE ONE THAT CAME UP WITH SHOOTI--" Caine yells as he inches his angry set of teeth and eyes as close to Jax as possible, until he randomly teleported back to where he previously was.
"You know what, forget it," Caine says, without his typical announcing voice. "Just take these passes, one for each of you two." He then snaps his fingers to shoot out two slips of paper from thin air, falling into Jax's hands.
Sure enough, they said "WINNER PASS" in a funky font, with Jax and Pomni's icon from their doors on each of them.
"Huh, I didn't know these were actual things I could get." Jax admits with an impressed look on his face, as he walks away.
"Can I ever make you folks happy!?!" Caine groans in frustration.
As Jax leaves to go to the hall of rooms, he did hear something from Caine: "Maybe I shouldn't focus on making my members happy. Once I show them how afraid I can make them, they'll come back to me, begging for my fun adventures..."
Jax doesn't want to admit to himself how much dread he felt at that. It was probably nothing.
Zooble looked at Jax, unimpressed. "You still haven't gotten Pomni out of her bed?"
"Oh, Zooble, how could you be so forgetful? Pomni and I have gotten these winner's passes right here, so we get to skip it!" He says cockily, flaunting the two passes that say "Caine approved!" on the back, but the icon of Caine looked a lot more intimidating than his usual smiling icons of himself.
"That's actual bullsh[%$!#]t. Caine never let us skip an adventure because we won the previous one, and you know it."
"Well, maybe you should've been better last adventure instead of wasting all your time sitting and talking with crybaby, maybe then you would've gotten these babies." Jax taunts, still showing off his passes with the flicks of his wrist.
"Right, and you went out of your way to give yourself and Pomni an excuse to stay in the circus alone together again, just like when you both won." Zooble argues, their bluntness hitting Jax like a truck.
It's not like Zooble was correct about that; Pomni just wanted to lay in bed for the rest of the day. But they weren't necessarily wrong, either. Jax has changed ever since he's gotten closer with Pomni, so much so that he's doing the very things that he would make fun of others for, like, making connections.
Zooble continues to stare at Jax as he stands there, pondering his thoughts. "Uh, hello? What, are you now going to ask Caine if you two can have sex?"
Jax snaps out of his train of thought at that, feeling the crack of his smiling face slipping. "Psh, nah. And no, Pomni and I are going to do our own thing. That's so rude of you to think that I don't have my own interests, you know," He teases. "Pfft, unlike you, who wants to..." Jax feels himself about to go through a laughing fit, as Zooble rolls their eyes.
"Oh, f[%$!#]k off. I talked about my own interests at the bar, while you said nothing about your own. I'm not listening to your bullsh[%$!#]t anymore today." They say, flipping off Jax as they walk away.
As Jax makes his way to the halls, knowing for sure that everyone else is gone, Jax lets out all the strain it took to make his silly exterior. He doesn't remember it feeling so painful and draining, his ears drooping down, his eyes having slight wrinkles underneath.
He hoped that the feeling that he had last night would go away, but it very clearly has not. If anything, he felt like it would only get worse the more he stuck around Pomni. But he's in too deep, he can't back away from her, no matter how hard his thoughts begged him to.
Questions swarm around his mind as he takes his steps towards Pomni's room.
Why do you keep checking Pomni's room?
Why are you afraid that Pomni is anything but asleep when she is laying on her bed, back turned against you?
But as Jax looks at Pomni's pass, the answers to those questions go through his head painfully quickly, explaining why he has such the urge to run away from her, the urge to create an impossibly wide distance between them.
He can't help but see a familiar face through that jester, and the icon on the door didn't help, since that familiar face also has a door, a door Jax has been trying to ignore, up until now, even though he knows he'll hate every moment of it.
Jax slips the pass under Pomni's door to not rudely wake her up-- No, it's not because of that, he just has something to do, that's all.
--
"Help me, God d[%$!#]mit."
Jax's head is planted towards another member's door, his ears dropping downwards. He takes a deep breath, and looks up to see the icon he refused to look at the adventure prior.
A frog with a smile that Jax has seen in many genuinely happy memories between the two, up until the very end...
It hurt to look at this door, especially with a red X that Jax never would have expected, at least at the time. Now, he knows better.
Not able to handle the stark contrast of the silent exterior with his shouting interior, Jax decides to talk some more.
"Heh, you know, I always wondered what caused you to snap," Jax says defeatedly, his smile tilting as he looks away. "But now, I think I've started to understand..." He says solemnly, his skin jittering at his voice echoing in the halls.
He knew that it was just him and Pomni in this tent, but he can't help but feel uncomfortable, anyways. Jax is well aware of Caine's all-seeing eyes, but he was able to ignore the creeping feeling in his lucid state of constant smiling and constant gags with his fellow members.
But without doing any of those, the feeling creeps back to him, and he has to get back to what he has been doing, but he can't. Because that would risk hurting a friend that he hasn't had in ages.
Caine may or may not be able to see him right now, but Jax's heart rate has been increasing back to that familiar pace in the awards show, and he can't cause an unwanted scene in front of anyone else.
Jax sighs as he takes a key out of his pocket, a key that he hasn't touched in a long, long time.
Sure enough, the unlit room looked almost exactly the same, even though certain bedsheets and blankets were all over the place, with some digital tears never dried off for whatever reason. Almost like the person living in this room had a mental breakdown the last time they came here...
Flooded memories of Jax and his old friend come sprawling across his mind, now in battle with new, thought up possibilities of how said friend must have had a mental breakdown similar to Jax's from last night.
Or more like, right now, as Jax turns away from the sight of the room, but not leaving, only grasping the walls as he slowly slides downwards, his knees giving in to this newfound despair in his mind as these conflicting thoughts continue to engulf him.
Much like how he felt in the bathroom, he felt the dark, unseen walls closing in on him as his breaths increase rapidly, his ears ringing.
However, it only lasted a little while as Jax took deep breaths, closing his eyes.
Slowly, his tense body slides down from the wall he was grasping onto, landing on the floor, legs flailed around while his arms are still touching the walls.
He chuckles a little bit, as he continues staring at his old friend's room, realization slowly creeping up on him even more the more he stares.
Jax was not afraid of seeing himself abstract in the bathroom...
He was afraid of seeing his friend abstract, hence the constant door checking.
It would make no sense, however, since Pomni was having such a good time with him, how could she suddenly turn around and start berating him in distre--
Oh.
Oh shit.
Suddenly, Jax's silent chuckling gets louder, as it then evolves into full-blown laughter, but not the kind that is genuine, like how Pomni and his old friend, Ribbit was, when Jax was trying to find his tail. This kind of laughter felt manic, kind of like how Caine has been laughing lately, trying to appeal to the humor of his members.
Jax remembers now. Throughout his nigh manic laughter, thoughts spark through his head at rapid speeds, reminding him of his foolish hopes that he could happily live in this hell of a circus with a companion forever.
Looking down at his shaking hands, his fingers clawing in tensely, he mentally screams at himself. He should have pushed her away. He should have seen this familiar pattern sooner. He never should have came on to her in the first place to figure out her stupid, fucking archetype.
It's almost like the people around you haven't devolved into cartoon archetypes. It's almost like they're still real people...
The jolt that Jax felt at that thought causes his entire body to slam onto the cold, hard floor as he slowly curls in onto himself. No. That can't be true. He has to fix this to get back to his usual, funny self again.
But it's too late now. He can't go back on it, he can't dare to hurt Pomni after she had gotten so close to him so fast. She hugged him, for fuck's sake.
No matter how fetal of a position Jax is in, the creeping eyes of Caine feel stronger than ever. He knows something is going to happen to him and Pomni, no matter how good their friendship will be. That's just how it works in this digital hell. Frustrated that he still can't seem to fully figure out what caused his previous friend to abstract, he continues laughing, although it grows even more hysterical as it attempts to drown out the dread of what is yet to come, his fetal body rolling back and forth onto the barren floor.
"It couldn't have been because of me, right?" Jax mutters to himself between his laughter, his warm breath reflecting onto the cold floor. "Right?!" He asks again, his body frazzled as he continues laughing uncontrollably.
"I-I-I know exactly what you're doing with Pomni..." A certain memory quickly takes over the rest of Jax's thoughts, almost as if it was responding to him.
"You know, getting close with Pomni... to corrupt her?"
Jax knows that Ragatha apologized to him for thinking that he was going to do something bad to Pomni, but after many moments of being constantly blamed for his closest friends' abstractions, it still stung, hard. These accusations only caused the two to drift apart, and no amount of bullets to Ragatha was able to truly calm down Jax's unrelenting anger.
Now, hyperventilation begins seeping into his maniacal laughter as his mind forcibly comes up with scenarios of what could cause Pomni to go mad, but they usually center around her yelling at him, most of which being eerily similar to what actually happened to him, long ago.
Why did Caine make Pomni look so alike to his previous friend? It's almost like he deliberately made her design look like the--
What if Pomni isn't actually a person at all, and she was just an NPC made by Caine to distract him from how Ribbit could have possibly abstracted.
Desperate screaming rips out of Jax's mouth as he continues laughing hysterically, the room continuously shaking around him, walls getting closer to him. Throughout each and every rapid chuckle, his shoulders land on the floor as he rolls over in agony and hysteria.
The moment Jax fully registered that loud, painful scream, he forced himself to calm down, sitting up and scooting himself to the closest wall behind him. His vision was still shaky and all over the place, but he did his best to slow down his panicked breaths, a forced, unintended laugh escaping through him occassionally as he tries sorting out his thoughts.
Eventually, Jax came to the conclusion that Pomni was not made by Caine, he wouldn't trick his members into thinking an NPC was an actual person, right? Jax also remembers the fact that Caine doesn't allow NPCs into the circus anyway, so that's cleared out.
Jax grumbles in frustration as his ears are drooped down from exhaustion, his hands rubbing all over his tear-covered face. First he thought that he was going to abstract, now he thought that his friend wasn't even a real person. How many more wacky conclusions is his mind going to conjure before it inevitably abstracts into madness?
Suddenly, Jax hears footsteps coming from the wall behind him. Quick footsteps, heading towards this room.
Stumbling on his feet, Jax quickly gets up, wiping away any proof of having a mental breakdown, his ears shooting upwards as he makes his leave from this room as fast as possible.
Thankfully, Pomni made it just in time to see Jax nowhere near the room he was just in.
She had a look of concern on her face, however, almost as if she had heard his maniacal laughter from minutes before.
"Uh, hi." Pomni says awkwardly, as she stares at Jax's massive grin on his face as he stands there, internally praying that she didn't hear much. "Are you ok? I heard some crazy laughing from my room."
Shit. "Ha hah, well, I found something hilarious, so hilarious in fact, I don't know if I should show you." Jax says, doing his best to hold up his usual cheeky exterior.
"Ok...Can I still see it though?" Pomni asks, now curious about what could have possibly made Jax scream with laughter.
"Psh, I told you, you do not want to see it." Jax teases, as he looks behind to grab a photograph from his front pocket, as he starts to laugh hard at it.
"A photograph? Come on, let me see." Pomni says in disbelief, although she had her smile. She walks towards Jax, only for him to prevent her from seeing it, putting his arm all the way up, pinching the photograph with his thumb and finger so she couldn't see it from above.
"Uh oh, looks like you'll have to jump to get it." Jax says in his mocking tone, with no real bite to it as he stares at Pomni with a smile that matches that tone.
Pomni thinks for a while however, a wide, smug grin coming to her now. "Actually, I have a better idea..."
"Wait, wha--"
Before Jax could say more, Pomni starts climbing around Jax like a cat climbing up a tree, catching him completely off guard. He started to tumble a bit, resulting in Pomni clutched onto his head and shoulders, trying to reach for the photograph. So this is what Jax gets for telling her to let loose. He can't say he doesn't find it incredulously charming, and even cute, however.
"Hnnngh, almost there, come on..." Pomni strains.
"Come on Pomni, are you sure you want to see such a ridiculous photo of yourself?" Jax taunts, causing her to instantly stop what she's doing to process what he just said.
"Wait, you were laughing over a picture of me?" Pomni asks, looking at Jax in disbelief.
"Yeah, I told you you don't want to see it, it's so embarassing." Jax responds, staring at Pomni's adorable face of confusion.
"...I don't remember any pictures being taken of me, except for the one we took last adventure... My evil persona wasn't that embarassing, Jax!" Pomni berates lightheartedly, giving Jax a light slap on the head she was grabbing onto.
"Oh, no, it's not that one. It's a picture of you from the Christmas party adventure..." Jax snickers.
"I-- Wha-- We didn't have a Christmas party adventure--" Pomni protests, her face flushed in confusion.
"Yeah, keep telling yourself that, we all know the truth," Jax says mockingly. "Well, time to put this photo back where it belongs." He says casually, as he puts the photograph in his mouth.
"D-Did you just eat a photograph?" Pomni asks in a much higher tone of disbelief. "You know what, I give up."
A brief moment of silence occurs.
"...Can you help me get down?" She asks timidly.
Jax couldn't help but snicker a bit at that, causing Pomni's blush to go even more deeper. Sure enough, he puts her down as if she were a cat trapped on a tree, having to be rescued.
"So, what do you wanna do now, now that your embarrassing Christmas photo woke you up?" Jax asks, not knowing what to do next. He was really hoping not to wake up Pomni.
"Huh, I don't know. Maybe we can just walk around the circus again?" Pomni suggests with a friendly tone.
"Sure, I guess so." Jax says nonchalantly, because in all honesty, he genuinely has no idea what to do, nor does he really have the energy to do something crazy after having two mental breakdowns in less than a simulated day.
Later on, while Pomni wasn't looking, Jax takes the photograph out of his mouth, revealing that he never swallowed and digested it. The photograph was, in fact, the photo of Jax and Pomni together, a photograph he will never admit to Pomni that he has kept so close to him. He can't ever admit to Pomni how close she has gotten to him, in general. That would mean opening up to her, which could lead to catastrophe.
Jax knows that no matter what, one of the two would abstract, and if it was going to be Pomni, he wouldn't want her to use his vulnerable information against him, he already learned from that mistake.
But if it was Jax to be the first to abstract, that would mean that Pomni would have to have her vulnerabilities thrown against her. Jax hopes that Pomni didn't have a life as messed up as he did before the circus, instead having a mundane life as an accountant in a supermarket chain.
Whatever the case may be, he will enjoy this friendship, even though he knows that the storm clouds will inevitably arrive, one way or another. He's just going to have to prepare to feel destroyed again, whether the prickly, black skin courses through himself internally, or his new friend, externally.
A deep-seated, incomprehensible, selfless part of himself hopes it'll come for him, first, even if it'll leave his friend devastated, much like he felt, not too long ago.