Chapter Text
Harry, Ron, Hermione just started their fifth year.
Harry took a deep breath before he went into the sorting because he knew people would stare, he was exhausted. He couldnt deal with more of this but he sadly had to, otherwise he was weak. He couldn't even remember the last time he slept the whole night through peacefully.
Ofcourse Malfoy had to ruin his day even more, as if being ignored by Dumbledore and also nearly expelled wasnt enough. Malfoy went up to him after the sorting ceremony.
"You shouldve been expelled" The blonde boy said mockingly.
"Stay away from me." Harry exclaimed hostilely as he charged forward at the blonde boy infront of him who's smiled vanished as he backed away.
Ron who held Harry told him to calm down since it was just Malfoy who had done that countless of times before.
Harry turned around and walked towards their tower faster than Ron and Hermione who eyed eachother very suprised and worried at the same time.
Harry went into the common room and everyone went quiet. They all stared at him. He saw the Daily prophet in about 3 peoples hands with others around them reading. "The boy who lies" "plotter", Harry decided to break the ice by awkwardly asking if Dean had had a good Summer. Seamus hit his paper on the table gathering Harry's and everybody elses attention. "I almost didn't come back this year."
"why.?" Harry asked sensing where this was going.
"Because my mam read about you in the Daily prophet. For all we know you are just a liar BEGGING för attention."
Harry clenched his fists in order not to punch him in his face.
"CEDRIC DIGGORY DIED. I saw him die, Voldemort killed him. If you dont believe me you should fuck off and your stupid mother as well."
"You dare speak about my mother?" Seamus stood there with rage.
"Ill have a go at anyone here that dares call me a liar." Harry shouted before running off to his dorm.
He kicked the dark oak bedframe before sitting down on his kind of soft bed.
'fuck.' He said to himself breathing loudly as he felt his chest tighten.It felt like his heart was going to pop out of his body. He tried to loosen his tie but had no success. Harry felt the world spin before everything went black.
Ron arrived in the dormatries and saw Harry on the floor.
'Merlin...' He lifted his friend up on his bed and made sure he was breathing. Thank fully they were the only people in there so Harry wouldn't have to be embarrassed.
Ron wondered why is friend passed out but didn't wake him Up. He went back into the common room and heard everyone talking bad about Harry. "How dare they?" He thought, Harry had literally saved them and their school count less of times without a break. How could they badmouth him like that just because the Daily prophet. He shook his head.
Harry, Hermione and Ron were on their way to their first class this year. Walking down the kind of dark corridors since the sun was still rising, making the corridors kind of golden but still quite dark.
Harry hadn't eaten in what felt like days. He felt his stomach beg for him to eat something. But he didn't, he continued walking as if nothing was going on inside his head or Stomach. To be fair, he hadn't eaten for 2 days. He just picked at his food at the feast and hadn't eaten anything at the Dursleys or before or after his hearing.
They were in defense against the dark arts, the annoying woman from his hearing was apparently going to have their dada classes this year. He banged his head on his desk and thought: why couldn't he have a normal year?. Students were playing around until a spell made the flying paper object catch fire and turn to ash.
Harry also felt something familiar lift his body up to a "POLITE" stance. He knew this spell. It was the Imperius curse. He learned this the year before when Voldemort used it on him. He knew how to break free from it, as he had done multiple times before. But isn't that curse unforgivable, why is someone at the ministry using it? Are they here to punish him? Harry knew he couldn't tell anyone before he knew what was up.
Umbridge- the annoying woman from Harry's hearing had been targetting Harry all lesson. Harry' s body was literally running on only will power at that point. No food, barely any sleep, no energy therefore.
They walked down the now light filled corridors to their next classes.
After all of the exhausting classes Harry had one more thing to do. Detention. He hadn't planned on getting in trouble first day but nothing suprised him anymore. He said goodbye to Ron and Hermione and left for the dada classroom to get to Umbridges office. While walking he thought about what happened in class. How Umbridge called him a liar and that he was weak. He knew he could be a pain to the teachers sometimes but he was definitely not a liar, and 100% not fucking weak. He had resisted the imperius curse 6 times. 5 by the death eater, disguised as Moody. Once by Lord Voldemort. He also survived the cruciatus curse, also by Voldemort. And not to mention the Avadra Kedavra multiple times. He fought Voldemort. He had endured years of bullying from the Dursleys. Harry KNEW he was strong. He knew he was not weak. That was atleast what he tried to tell himself.
Harry knocked and was let in, the walls were pink with cat paintings that meowed. The meows wanted Harry to literally kill himself, it was sickening. Umbridge led Harry to a wooden chair with pink padding. Harry sat down and infront of him was a sheet of paper. "You will be doing some lines for me today." A deeply unsettling smile ran across the professor's face, Harry thought this looked scarier than Voldemort in his weird fetus form.
Harry sighed with more sass you would think he would have alone with his professor in the evening. "What do you want me to write?" He asked, exhausted from the day, his hand was literally also exhausted from all the classes he had that day and how much he had to write in them.
"Lets start with something.. easy."
"I must not tell lies." Dolores smiled, you could tell she was very pleased with herself.
The only word running through Harry's mind was 'hag.' .
"How many times?"
"Till it sinks in."
Harry picked up his quill before being stopped by Umbridge. "You will be using a rather special one of mine." she smiled and gave him a quill as she sat down on her even more pink chair.
Harry sighed and picked up the quill, the paper was a little yellowed and he started writing on it. The quill was black and long.
When he wrote he felt something on his hand. His hand felt like it was splitting open, his left hand, the one he wasn't writing with. He looked at it and saw the words "I must no" being cut into the back of his hand. A few grunts were let out but nothing more. He continued writing because he knew he would only make it worse by fighting back at that time. "You deserve to be punished, and you know it Potter." Dolores said in a voice somehow enriched with passion. "Why does this person like me being punished? What kind of sick monster likes that?!" Harry thought to himself as he stared at the paper wanting to lift his hand up and hit her across the face. Ofcourse he couldn't do that because he wouldbe suspended, and his hand was also too weak. After all that Harry covered his left hand in his robe and went back to his house. It was now 22.02. One hour and two minutes past curfew, Harry got dressed for bed and tried to fall asleep. He tried for so long, he looked at a clock in their dorm and it showed 01.07. Harry groaned exhausted, he just wanted to sleep. He put his glasses on, his black hoodie, his cloak and ofcourse his wand. He held the map in his left hand and he put the cloak over himself. He made sure he wasn't close to any professor with the help of the map, he managed to get away to the owlery where he sat till about 5:12.
His steps made noise in the grass. He wished he had brought a jacket or something, it was very cold. He could barely see anything out in the dark. He know Voldemort was out there, somewhere. The wind whistled in his ears as he made his way back through the dark empty corridors that echoed with every step he took. He slid into bed at about 6 and woke up around eight, one hour before classes start. Harry decided to join Ron and Hermione for breakfast half an hour before classes started. Hogwarts didn't have the same spark and colour to it as it did before in his first and second year. It was darker now. Moodier. He felt so many people stare at him still, that never changed. But the demeanor changed, in his first years, when he arrived, introduced to a whole new world. He only felt stares of wonder, love, maybe a few of hate from slytherins. But everyone else seemed to love him, he had defeated Voldemort without even knowing it. Now the stares were almost all filled with hatred.
He felt the stares like they were nails. They pierced through his back and out his heart, he hated being hated, he thought he would've found a lovely home here at hogwarts after all those years at the dursleys but no. They have to always hate him for something. Harry looked around as he stepped into the great hall, some people shocked and disgusted, someone even spat gum on his robe. He shook it off and tried to keep to himself. The only thing that was touched on his plate that 10 minutes he was in the great hall before he walked out was a bit of scrambled eggs.
Harry felt eyes on him everywhere, it made him crazy. This was only his second day. How on earth was he supposed to survive 10 months?
Someone called him a liar when he was on his way to wait outside potions because he was early.
He clenched his jaw and fists before taking a deep breath, turning around, running back across the now golden corridor. He grabbed the guy who shouted at him by his robe, threw him against the wall and kicked him in his gut. He didn't even care if he was going to get detention with the pink kitten obsessed lady. He had gone through such unimaginable pain last year and couldn't bear to be called a liar for it. He hadn't even told anyone about what actually happened. He just mentioned the graveyard,blood and Cedric. He really had no one to talk to. ever. Well he had Sirius, Sirius was amazing. Sirius was truly amazing. Harry sat outside the potions class with a potions book in his hand, he was actually going to try in potions this year, well he was good at it but he wanted to be better. Just so Snape didn't hate him as much, though he would probably hate him more for trying.
After all his classes he had to go to detention again with Umbridge. This time his hand started bleeding. The blood filled up all the cuts making the words stand out more.
Harry hated it, he hated it so much but what could he do? Absolutely nothing. It was 10pm, same as last time, only now, the air was scarier. The mood was different. Harry tried to not mind it as he walked down the corridors. "Lumos." He said after about 2 seconds since he nearly walked into a wall. He heard something move infront of him. The corner was dark so he couldn't see clearly but he was pretty sure he saw somebody. He turned around to look and he felt someone literally attack him with their whole bodyweight. His wand was clenched in his hand, he made it on his back and he stared up at the person who attacked him. It looked kind of like the kid he had beat up. They were in their 6th year. Harry grunted, his knees hurt from the fall on the stone floor.
"Not so cocky now are we Potter.?" The boy said mocking Harry.
It was a Slytherin, brunette. At first he was worried it was Draco but it wasnt, this person had a darker voice and obviously darker hair.
Harry had his wand in his left hand because he didn't think he would have to use it. He tried to switch it to his right hand to cast an expelliarmus charm but ofcourse the slytherin boy noticed and was faster to kick him so he dropped his wand.
The boy lifted Harry up by his head before punching him in his face, right on his nose. Probably breaking it. Harry tried to do something back but he was way too exhausted running on an egg and a bleeding hand. He gasped when he felt a kick in the ribs. The boy then left Harry, all alone in the corridors at night. Ths was perfect for Voldemort, he was weak. No he was not weak. He put his right hand on his ribs and grabbed his wand with the other hand.
He then used all his power to get up on foot. Now he had to make it up the stairs of agony without getting caught by a professor. Yay. Harry successfully made it to the house but had less of a success trying to stop his nose from bleeding. It was probably broken, aswell as atleast one of his ribs. He didn't know what to do but he went to the boy's bathroom and put paper up his nose and wet a cloth he had in his bedside from the last time he broke his nose and held it to his nose.
After 5 minutes of pain and absolute agony he was in bed. Not asleep but in bed, he managed to not wake up anyone even tho he sometimes couldnt help but gasp or whisper-shout in pain. He couldn't sleep the rest of the night. He laid awake all the remaining time until Ron woke up.
Ron woke up and was read to wake up Harry when he saw he was covered in blood. "Bloody hell Harry! What happened?!" He exclaimed while shaking Harry demanding a response.
Harry woke up and looked at himself shocked by the amount of blood. He hadn't seen the blood since it was dark when he got attacked.
"Fell down the stairs." He lifted his hand to scratch the back of his head and felt something warm and liquidy. Blood. Had he broken his cranium as well? Great.
He changed into his robes slowly, grunting and moaning with every small movement knowing his body is way too tired for this. He would not be able to go to breakfast looking like this, people would probably think he was seeking more attention. He was not. Right now, there was nothing more the brunette haired, beaten up boy wanted than to be left alone. But he knew he had to go to breakfast, he would literally not survive if he didn't eat today. His body needed to heal and he needed energy to clear classes.
He sat down in the common room and tried revising in a book, he had to keep himself up to date in all classes, he wanted to make Dumbledore somewhat proud after he saved him from being expelled. Hermione and Ron sat down beside him.
"Harry, what happened? You have bruises everywhere.. And your nose!" Hermione asked as worried as only she can be.
"Oh. Uhm. Stairs." Harry replied rushed. He continued to read about defense against the dark arts, not the digusting book Umbridge gave them, but one he found in the library. He had gone to the library before detention yesterday and had picked it up.
"Your hand Harry." Hermione stared at Harry's left hand which immediately vanished from her sight to beside him.
Harry showed her his right hand and acted confused meaning everything was fine.
"Your left hand."
Harry felt a shiver down his spine as he put his hand ontop of his book, he covered it with his right arm.
"Harry this is important."
Harry sighed and uncovered his hand.
"Bloody hell Harry!! The woman is torturing you.!" Ron exclaimed, suprised at how Harry isn't literally dying.
"You have to tell Dumbledore." Hermione said firmly while she examined the hand.
"no. No one will tell Dumbledore until we are sure of whats going on, we cant ruin more things."
"Its perfectly simple! You have to tell Dumbledore Harry It-"
"It's not simple Hermione, whatever this is , it is not simple. You don't understand," Harry said with the last part sounding more quiet like he is shutting down, interrupting Hermione and quickly gathering his things.
"Then help us to." Hermione said in a worried and soft voice as her friend walked away. She turned to look at Ron.
"I am going to tell someone. "
Ron felt a little bad going behind Harry's back but knew it was for the best to let Hermione tell someone. It was torture after all.
The great hall was loud at breakfast but got noticeably quieter when Harry went in. He took what he needed and walked out. Not saying a word to anyone but giving them glares. The stares were driving him insane. He walked outside to the wooden bridge where he spoke to Lupin years ago. He slid down with his back to the scenery and ate his breakfast quietly. He was so hungry, he was so happy that he decided to get breakfast. He moaned out of relief and sat on the bridge enjoying his time before classes started.
The classes had gone well, he actually understood what was going on. Maybe it was because of his breakfast. It was quite enjoyable for Harry but he had kind of avoided Ron and Hermione but he hoped they didn't notice.
He went out to the owlery at lunch and saw dark skeleton horses with wings fly around in the forbidden forest.
"That looks like the horse that pulled my carriage!" Harry decided to go check it out.
While he was going through the trees he wondered how and when the horse-like creatures got there and if hagrid knew what they were. After three minutes of walking he was there and saw someone familiar.
"Luna?" Harry asked, suprised.
"Hello Harry." Luna said with the softest voice he had ever heard.
Harry stepped closer to beside her.
She had very light blonde wavy hair that was quite shiny, she had it in a half up half down. She had a blue cardigan over a white baggy long sleeve. The blue matched her silvery-blue eyes Harry thought. She wore white pants that were rolled up to her knees. She wasn't wearing any shoes, she was completely barefoot.
"Luna, your feet." He paused for a second not wanting to sound mean. "Aren't they cold?"
"Not so much, you see, I can't find my shoes. I suspect nargles have hid them somewhere."
"Nargles? Harry had no idea what she meant.
"Yes!" She picked an apple from her bag and threw it to a baby winged skeleton horse.
"What are they? Why couldn't anyone else see them?" Harry asked staring at all of the creatures.
"Thestrals. Only those who have witnessed death can see them." Luna replied as she pulled out a piece of meat and threw it at the foal.
"You have seen death?" Harry asked suprised and feeling bad at the same time, knowing how Cedric's death absolutely destroyed him.
"Yes." Luna explained how one of her mother's spells backfired, ending up with her dying infront of nine year old Luna.
"That's horrible Luna, I'm sorry." Harry and Luna held hands as a way to connect.
They stood in silence for a bit before Luna broke the silence.
"We believe you."
Harry wondered what she meant.
"That you know who is back, and that you fought him."
"Seems like you are the only ones that do."
Harry and Luna faced eachother staring into eachothers eyes.
She smiled.
"I don't think so, If I were him I'd want you to feel as alone as possible because if it's just you alone, you're less of a threat.
Harry thought about it, realizing she is probably right. "Do you want to walk back to lunch together?" He asked wanting to be polite seeing Luna as a friend because they both seemed to understand eachother.
"Do you think they have pudding?" Luna asked with a whimsy look in her eyes.
"Maybe.?" Harry answered with a smile.
They walked back to the great hall together.
When they arrived they parted ways. Harry went up to Ron and Hermione and awkwardly asked if he could sit with them when everyone around them stared at him.
Hermione who sat closest opened her mouth and only let out a squeak. Harry thought it looked like she was suprised and she looked like she had been caught doing something she shouldn't have. She stared at him with sorrow in her eyes.
Everyone stared at him and he stared back. The silence was broken by Professor Mcgonagall and Umbridge arguing. Harry turned around and listened, aswell as everyone else.
"Punishing my students with a blood quill is a NO-GO."
"Are you questioning me Minerva?"
"Yes, I am, it is outrageous!"
"You do know you are insulting Cornerlius Fudge."
She paused staring out the great hall at all the children, she hated them all.
"It appears the state at hogwarts is worse than I thought." Umbridge said looking out at all the students.
Harry knew exactly why Hermione felt so bad, he knew exactly what she had done. She had told Mc Gonagall, and now everything is going to go crazy here. Umbridge is going to take over hogwarts. All because Hermione couldn't keep her mouth shut.
He stormed out of the somehow quiet hall with ofcourse everybody staring at him.
"Why didn't she just listen?! I knew there was something more to it." Harry said to himself as he rushed through the cold corridors. His body ached everywhere while he walked, especially his ribs. He wanted to attack the person who hurt him now more than he did during the attack. But he didn't know where that would lead him so he decided to just go to the viaduct and stare out the water.
"She thinks she is such a fucking genius all the time," He paused." She is not always the smartest in the room." He took out his wand and wanted to go attack someone, he literally had people shouting at him and throwing stuff at him so he thought it was only fair to lash out once.
"No." He flinched when he realized what he was thinking. What was he thinking? He put his wand away and walked away to class. His anger was still unbearable but he learned to bear it, making it bearable. Not for the normal person. If it was anyone other than Harry they wouldve probably been mad already, but Harry had people expecting things of him. He couldn't show weakness. He was so scared of turning into Voldemort.
Ron and Hermione tried to talk to him all day but he didn't say a word and avoided them. Umbridge had put up a rule on the wall outside the great hall. He knew this was just the start.
Harry avoided his two friends all week while Umbridge put up more rules. The days went by slow, the nights even slower. He could barely sleep. All he thought about was that night, how he felt such unimaginable pain. How his parents had come back. How Cedric flew back and what his face looked like when his body went cold. Harry didn't feel good about ignoring Hermione or Ron but he was so angry. So angry that he was scared he would give someone a concussion in two seconds.
It was saturday. Harry decided to write a letter to Sirius, he would understand him.
"Dear padfoot, I hope you're alright. It's getting colder here, winter is definitely on the way. In spite of being back at hogwarts, I feel more alone than ever.
I know you, of all people, will understand. We have a new defense teacher, but I am not so keen with her. She is from the ministry and I am afraid she's going to ruin hogwarts. My scar started hurting when she touched me in detention yesterday. I hope he isn't close. And Hagrid is away on sick leave, it's quite depressing. I hope you are doing well, write back when you can.
Harry. "
He had enough of ignoring Hermione and Ron, he thought he could bear just a week more but he really couldn't. He put his letter on his bedside table along with his glasses, threw on a red sweater that matched gryffindor's red colour and black sweatpants. He looked over and saw Ron sleeping, ofcourse he was, it was Saturday. He always slept in on saturdays when Harry went to train for quidditch, Harry wanted to bring Ron as he also played quidditch but never got him to go with him on mornings. He put his glasses on and went out to the pitch.
It was 9 o'clock. Harry was the only one outside. He shouldve brought a jacket but he is too stupid to remember that. Harry practised his balance, he stood up on his broom as he flew as fast as he always does. He actually thought he had kind of a good balance.
"I might be crazy." He thought as he lifted one of his feet from his broom, still going 100mph. He balanced on one foot. He wondered if his dad had ever done that as he did laps around the training pitch. He lost his balance after 20 seconds of having closed eyes and fell down onto the grass. He laughed. He hadn't laughed in so long, it felt kind of weird. He mounted his broom and went straight up into the sky as fast as he could. He only went back down when the air was difficult to breathe in, he flew down in the same speed he had up, if not faster. He turned upright right before hitting the ground breaking his personal record.
He walked back to his house at about 12:10. Ron was laying on the sofa by the fireplace throwing sweets into his mouth blabbering on about how school is something we humans have designed and therefore is not important. Hermione was on the floor studying, rolling her eyes and trying to get him to understand how stupid he sounded.
Harry went up to them and made a gesture for Ron to move his feet covered in homemade socks. Ron brought his legs closer to his upper body and was suprised Harry had sat down with them. He had ignored them for days.
"H-Harry!" Hermione exclaimed as she hugged him. Delighted that he was hanging out with them again.
Harry and Ron threw sweets in eachothers mouths as Hermione asked them questions about some tests they had coming up before hitting her hands on her legs that were crossed.
"I can't believe we have to learn this rubbish!" She said as she stared at the defense against the dark arts book they got from Umbridge.
"Yeah, we have no chance against him when he comes back." Harry replied back with his arms under his head, staring up at the ceiling.
Ron and Harry were laying straight in the sofa with their legs beside eachother's torsos.
"We need a teacher." She switched her gaze from her book to Harry and Ron.
"One who has had real experiences." She stared Harry in the eyes.
After two whole days of trying to convince Harry he finally gave in.
It was monday, time for classes. Harry couldn't find his uniform's jumper so he just took a quidditch one under his robe.
"What are you wearing Potter.?" Umbridge said when she saw the red and yellow under his black robe.
"Uhm.. Clothes?" Harry replied with unimaginable sass.
"Is that a quidditch jumper?"
"..yes?" He replied exactly like him before his third year.
"That is not the proper uniform."
"I know.. I couldn't find my normal jumper."
Umbridge eyed him up and down before telling him to go change.
"No."
"You will be expelled otherwise."
"Nothing says I have to wear it, there is not a single rule."
"You are right." Umbirdge said as she giggled, obviously annoyed.
Umbridge added a rule the next day forcing students to wear their proper uniform or face the consequence of detention.
Two weeks later.
"There is like a week left of September!" Ron exclaimed as he took a sip of his butterbeer.
"Yes exactly. We have to find people, who would not like to be trained by Harry? It should be easy enough."
"Anyone.." Harry replied.
"Anyone who has eyes and can read the daily prophet would not like to be "trained" by me.
He scoffed.
"They all think that I murdered Cedric or something." He took a huge sip of his butterbeer. He thought it tasted weird.
"Harry? Where are you going?" Hermione asked, clearly annoyed that he was leaving during an important discussion.
"Butterbeer." He replied as he put his cloak on.
He swore he wouldn't use his cloak for bad things, but his drink tasted like pure earwax. That was bad enough.
He went into a room looking for ingredients for a butter beer. He must've went into the wrong place because all he could see were old bottles. He took his wand out and said Lumos. It was way too dark for anyone without the eyesight of a cat to see comfortably.
Firewhisky. He grabbed a bottle and stuffed it in his pocket.
He smiled, knowing Ron would be over the top once he showed him the bottle.
He quitely snuck out of the place, with his wand away obviously.
He snuck back to Ron and Hermione.
"Where did you go?" Ron asked as Harry put his cloak away.
"You'll see. Now, any ideas of how we do these defense classes?"
"Let's gather people and then find a place for us. The more heads looking- the bigger chances of finding a good room. " Ron said cleverly.
"That is.. Brilliant. Ron." Hermione said in awe.
They gathered some people in a closed sketchy bar to avoid anyone disturbing them the next day.
"Right so... Welcome everybody.. As you may know.. Harry is going to be holding defense classes since Umbridge isnt doing anything about it.. And we are obviously seriously in grave danger later.." Hermione stated, very awkwardly with 20 people standing before her.
"Why?" A kid in their second year asked, sounding quite annoying.
"Because you know who's back you tosspot." Ron hissed back.
"How do you know he is back? No one was actually there the ni-"
"Yeah, if Harry would just tell us a little more about when Cedric died maybe-"
"Okay, Ron, Hermione, lets go. They are just here about Cedric." Harry said obviously very disturbed and sad by it.
Hermione stood with an open mouth, wanting to say something but didn't know what.
"I am not going to talk about Cedric, if you are here about him then go." Harry hissed out at everyone.
They all stood or sat in quiet for about a minute before Luna broke the silence.
"Is it true you can produce the patronus charm Harry?"
"Blimey! I didn't know you could do that! Dean said in absolute awe, knowing it's a very difficult charm.
Hermione hurried.
"Yes!"
"He fought Voldemort and saved the philosopher's stone in his first year, defeated voldemort again and killed a basalisk with the sword of gryffindor in his second year, he chased away at least a thousand of dementors in his third year with the patronus charm. He fought Voldemort last year, he won the triwizard tournament!"
Nearly everybody were suprised before Harry interrupted Hermione.
"No, No Hermione stop it. I am not being modest, I nearly always had help."
"It is so incredibly scary. In school, if you make a mistake you can try again. You never have to be scared because you are always safe. Not out there. If you make a mistake, so close to death you could be waving at your deceased ones. If you make a mistake you don't know what will happen. It is terrifying. It is painful and cruel. You have no idea how that's like."
"You are right, we don't." Hermione looked at Harry.
"That's why you are the right person to teach us, you have real experiences."
After a bit of trying to come up with a name they finally decided on Dumbledores army.
Dumbledore was feared by the dark wizards so Ginny and Cho thought that name was perfect.
Walking back at 18.00 was fun. It was Hermione, Ron, Harry, Luna, Ginny, Fred, George and Neville.
Hermione told Harry about how Cho couldn't keep her eyes of him.
Harry smiled as they walked back.
When entering the hogwarts castle they were discussing where to locate their secret orginisation.
Umbridge ofcourse heard that and put up a rule outside the great hall stating that all student orginisations were strictly forbidden and that anyone who disobeyed that rule would be expelled.
It was September 30th. The last day of September, they had already spent a month at Hogwarts. He wasn't sure he found it really enjoyable but- when did he ever? He always had encounters with death, so it felt like an old friend more than something making him shiver in his boots.
He was happy quidditch would start soon. Their first quidditch match of the season was in three days - November 3rd. They had a new team captain - Angelina Johnson. Ron had also tried out for keeper and got the spot, Harry was kind of bitter. Like coffee without any milk. He was mad that Hermione and Ron got to be prefects and not him. He took comfort in playing quidditch without Hermione and Ron, where he could calm down, be away from them. But now Ron also got the team, he found it kind of unfair that he got to be both a prefect and a quidditch player. He wanted to tell Angelina he was horrible, he wanted to let Fred and George bully him off the team. He wanted to scare him, maybe "accidentally" knock him off his broom. They always kept stuff from him aswell, like how they were spending the summer with SIRIUS. Sirius - HARRY'S GODFATHER. HIS ONLY FAMILY. He certainly wasn't Ron's or Hermione's godfather. He found it so unfair on how people treated him like a kid who couldn't be told santa didn't exist, or that there existed evil in the world. He certainly knew evil existed, he was fighting it last year. He was the one who truly fought Voldemort, not Ron, not Hermione. Him. It made him so incredibly mad that they kept things from him.
Harry felt gazes on him, he felt the atmosphere shift. It was unusually quiet around him. He noticed he had zoned out. Hermione, Ron, Fred, George, Seamus, Dean, Neville, Ginny. They were all staring at him. As if he were some animal in a zoo, inspecting him.
"Harry, you alright?" Ron asked and put a hand on his shoulder.
Harry replied with a nod and a hm, he looked around and saw Ginny stare at him worried most of all. He felt his stomach do five laps around his body. He could have sworn he almost threw it up. He wouldn't want to worry Ginny. The girl he felt cold as ice in the chamber, the girl he swore to himself to never let anything like that happen to ever again.
After breakfast he walked slower than his two newly made prefect friends. He was lost in thought. He thought everything had been going well, he thought he was happy. But he clearly wasn't. He felt someones hand on his shoulder weighing him down as they jumped to beside him. It was Ginny. Ginny with her read hair. freckles, brown eyes and gorgeous smile. She radiated happiness, something about her made Harry want to stay close to her at all times. He wanted to glue them together.
"Whatcha doing?" She asked playfully.
"Im walking to classes.." Harry replied, just as playfully. Like a tiger hiding in long grass ready to attack their brother who was also waiting to attack him .
"Wanna go together?" She asked.
"You only have three questions left today." Harry said as they walked to their next class. Ginny knew he would always walk with her.
Harry felt like he was playing it very nonchalantly, he always stuttered talking with Cho. Ginny was different in his eyes, she understood him. He could therefore always be himself, so he wasn't afraid of saying the wrong things. Maybe it was because Harry often spent time at the Burrow, trying to keep away from the Dursleys. Sadly he had to stay there because Dumbledore thought it was safe. Harry never understood how he deemed being beaten constantly safe.
They had spent quite some time together, not nearly as much as he did with Hermione and Ron, but still a lot. She was together with Dean, Harry had thought of hexing him a couple times. Maybe ask Sirius for ideas on which hexes to use. But he didn't, he felt like there was no use ruining someone else's day just for his own satisfaction. But he swore to hex him if he ever laid a hand on Ginny. He was sometimes like her older brother, protecting her more than Ron ever did. He realized he had been staring at her all the way to class because he realized she was starting to blush a little. Hopefully she didn't think he was creepy. He had zoned out. Did she notice that?
Harry always wondered if anyone noticed when the dark thoughts consumed him, when he wasn't sure if he was alive or dead. When he felt like he was just watching in third person, when he watched himself and everyone around him from somewhere else. He always wondered if people really noticed, or if they were just annoyed he didn't answer or pay attention to their conversation. They continued to walk, in perfect silence, not silence that made you anxious, not the silence that felt like something was going to pound at you any second. No, it was relaxing silence, like the one where ur mother rocked you to sleep, barely awake herself. Harry didn't know how it felt to be rocked to sleep, or how it sounded. Aunt Petunia would throw things at Harry before Vernon came and made sure he stopped crying, but he thought it would feel and sound like this.
After the classes were done Harry left his friends who had "prefect duties" whatever that meant. They were probably snogging in some broom closet. He was walking around the already darkened corridors. They were dark even tho they had a few dozen torches. Dobby apparated to infront of Harry.
"Hi Harry Potter!" He said with joys.
"Hello Dobby." Harry replied wallking slow and heavy as if his feet were tied to the ground with weights.
"How are you anyways, I haven't seen you in a while!"
Dobby radiated with happiness, Harry had almost always been kind to Dobby, treating him like an equal.
"Dobby is very good!" He then replied before his grin vanished from his face and a worried or more confused face creeped in on his.
"How are you? You seem troubled Harry!" Dobby knew to adress Harry in second perspective and not third. Harry had told him how it felt wrong.
"Well, I've been thinking about something.. He stopped, looked around and crouched down to Dobby and whispered.
"We are making a secret organisation, I am going to train a few students in defense since Umbridge wont. But we can't find a place to train where she wont find us.."
Dobby listened carefully, wanting to hear every word.
His face lit up.
"I know a place!" He said as he apparated them both to another corridor in Hogwarts.
They stood infront of a wall, but slowly a door manifested form on it.
Harry's jaw was on the floor, as he went to pick it up, Dobby opened the door.
They had everything they needed in that room, eqipment, isolation, it was amazing.
Dobby explained how it was always equipped with the persons needs, it only truly showed itself to people who really needed it. Which was perfect since that toad looking Umbridge surely didn't need it.
Harry let out a chuckle as he praised Dobby.
He couldn't wait to tell this to Hermione and Ron.