Chapter Text
Fields
MERLIN stomps along with apparently everything he owns in a satchel on his back while an old man voiceovers about how awesome MERLIN’s eventually going to be.
That shot of CAMELOT is pretty cool, to be fair. Even if it is only a model.
(There, I did my contractually obligated Monty Python joke. That’s it now! That’s all you’re getting!)
CAMELOT
MERLIN wanders around through the town, being so amazed at everything that I’m amazed he hasn’t been pickpocketed already.
In the castle square, a man is executed for magic by UTHER PENDRAGON. MORGANA watches from a window.
UTHER: I am a great king and CAMELOT would be nothing without me.
OLD WOMAN: You killed my son and I curse you!
She vanishes using MAGIC.
MERLIN wanders around the castle looking for GAIUS. Apparently, knowing the name of someone who works there is enough for no one to question you ever.
GAIUS’ rooms are up a lot of stairs, which seems mean, as GAIUS is quite elderly.
GAIUS is up on a ladder. MERLIN clears his throat and GAIUS promptly falls over. MERLIN uses MAGIC to stop him in midair and move a bed under him.
GAIUS: WHAT WAS THAT WHAT DID YOU DO
MERLIN: Nothing, I don’t know. MAGIC, I guess.
GAIUS: You tell people that easily and you’ve come to CAMELOT, where MAGIC is outlawed on pain of death?
MERLIN: Yep! (grins gormlessly)
GAIUS: Right, well. I suppose I’d better take you on as an apprentice then.
MERLIN’s new bedroom has a really nice view of CAMELOT.
GAIUS reads a letter from HUNITH, MERLIN’s mother. She is worried about MERLIN getting in trouble in their village and asks GAIUS to watch over him and help him.
GAIUS is wearing glasses. Actual, proper, ground lenses in wire frames glasses.
MORGANA’s lurking in a corridor, watching some guards clean up in the yard.
UTHER: Can’t help noticing you’re not at the feast.
MORGANA: Can’t help noticing you’re still killing people who haven’t done anything wrong.
UTHER: He broke the laws of the kingdom.
MORGANA: The law is an ass.
UTHER: Stop sulking and come and meet our finest singer.
MORGANA: Make me.
UTHER: I can do that. I’m your guardian.
MORGANA: Yes, I actually was aware of that.
Forest
GWEN COOPER from TORCHWOOD is sitting in a tent humming to herself. There are several guards around. She’s a bit nervous because there are birds cawing and leaves rustling.
Her name is LADY HELEN in this.
The OLD WOMAN from CAMELOT’s courtyard uses voodoo to make her fall over, then changes to look like her. Her reflection still shows her real face, though.
CAMELOT
MERLIN is woken by a strange voice whispering his name. He heads down to GAIUS’s workshop, where GAIUS is a sort of gruff father for a few minutes before deliberately knocking over a bucket to test MERLIN. He is very astonished when MERLIN claims not to use any spells, he just does it.
He sends MERLIN off to do some errands for him. Way to keep him out of trouble, there, GAIUS.
MERLIN messes up the first delivery. Smashing start.
On his way to his second delivery, MERLIN comes across a BLOND GUY bullying a servant by making him run around with a target while he throws daggers at it. A MAID is watching from a high window.
MERLIN: Maybe you should stop that now.
BLOND GUY: Maybe you should mind your own business.
MERLIN: Why, who’s going to make me, the king?
BLOND GUY: How about the king’s son?
MERLIN: What, ARTHUR? Is he here? Because I’ve never...oh…
ARTHUR: Yeah. ‘oh’.
MERLIN is thrown in the dungeon.
‘Lady Helen’ arrives with a whole lot of guards. It’s very late for someone to be arriving, isn’t it?
She presents herself to UTHER, MORGANA and MORGANA’s maid, along with other UNIMPORTANT PEOPLE.
In the morning, MERLIN is woken by the same strange voice. That is a bloody massive cell he’s in.
GAIUS comes to berate him very loudly for drawing attention to himself, then says he can get out of the cell but he has to spend some time in the pillory. This is not fun, because people like to waste a lot of food by throwing it at whoever’s in there. GAIUS finds this hilarious.
GUINEVRE, known as GWEN, MORGANA’s maid, comes to introduce herself and incidentally insult MERLIN as much as possible. She hurries off when the next round of FOOD WASTING PEASANTS arrive.
Back in GAIUS’ rooms, they discuss his ‘gifts’. GAIUS still can’t figure out how MERLIN does what he does. When MERLIN asks if GAIUS knows magic, he turns the discussion to CAMELOT’s history; twenty years ago, UTHER declared war on MAGIC and MAGIC USERS and killed all but one of the DRAGONS. The remaining one is imprisoned beneath the castle. But nevermind that now, MERLIN needs to take some medicine to ‘LADY HELEN’ !
MERLIN lets himself into the room without knocking, which is kind of rude. He finds the voodoo doll and ‘LADY HELEN’s’ Book of Shadows, but she returns before he can find out anything incriminating.
MERLIN heads out into the town, where he meets ARTHUR and a group of - well, they’re probably not knights, because they’re not in armour, so let’s say THUGS. ARTHUR and MERLIN goad each other into a fight with flails, during which they destroy a lot of things.
MERLIN: Shit, the trained knight is better than I am. (MAGICS ARTHUR into falling down a lot. It doesn’t help.)
GAUIS: You’re being reckless and foolish!
MERLIN: MAGIC’S BEEN MORE OF A FATHER TO ME THAN YOU EVER HAVE! (storms off)
GAUIS: (Sighs, goes to start medicining)
MERLIN: Am I a monster?
GAIUS: I am not wise enough to answer that.
‘LADY HELEN’: Will everyone be at my concert tomorrow? I mean everyone, really everyone? ARTHUR?
UTHER: Yes, probably.
‘LADY HELEN’: Such a shame he has no mother. It’s such a special bond, mother and son, isn’t it.
UTHER: Yes, I’m - sure it is.
MERLIN is woken again by the VOICE. This time, he follows it down into the dungeons, but not before he MAGICALLY pulls GAIUS’ blanket up, because doing it by hand...might wake him?
He passes the DUMBEST GUARDS EVER and heads down into the caves under the dungeons. Why did they even bother with dungeons? Just bung people down in the caves!
About seven miles down, he finally finds a MASSIVE DRAGON in the middle of a MASSIVE CAVE.
DRAGON: Hi, I’ll be playing the part of ‘ENIGMATIC MENTOR’ for the next few years. ARTHUR’s gonna be great, but he’ll need you beside him and that’s why you have MAGIC.
MERLIN: That’s not very enigmatic. It’s just totally wrong, because ARTHUR’s a big jerk.
DRAGON: Talk to me in a few years. (flies away)
GAIUS gives him more jobs to do, including delivering medicine to MORGANA. He once again walks in without knocking and is mistaken for GWEN by an oblivious MORGANA. There is a lot of fumbling around and hiding behind dresses until GWEN comes in, but the point is, MORGANA definitely hates ARTHUR and she’s not going to the ball with him, no way, uh uh, he hasn’t even asked her yet! I mean, at all!
A MAID comes to give ‘LADY HELEN’ some fruit and tidy her room, but accidentally sees her OLD WOMAN REFLECTION, so ‘LADY HELEN’ sings her to death. No, really.
The FEAST starts. MERLIN sees ARTHUR. ARTHUR sees MORGANA, in a very daring, shoulders bared red dress.
That’s the third time someone’s said ‘God’. Seems strange for this series…
GWEN manages to completely insult MERLIN again, and also make a FORESHADOWING JOKE.
People find their seats as UTHER wanders in.
UTHER: CAMELOT is brilliant, and here’s LADY HELEN to prove it!
‘LADY HELEN’ sings in what might actually be WELSH. People start falling asleep, but not MERLIN, for some reason. Spider webs grow on people, and it’s gross.
‘LADY HELEN’ attempts to throw a dagger at ARTHUR, instead of just walking up to him and stabbing him. The delay give MERLIN time to MAGICALLY knock down a chandelier on her. People start waking up, but the spider webs are still there. GROSS.
‘LADY HELEN’, now back in OLD WOMAN form, attempts to throw the dagger again. MERLIN dashes to save ARTHUR, although for some reason instead of pushing him in the direction he was going anyway, he stops moving, reverses and pulls him instead. I’m sure it made sense somehow. Maybe he was afraid of hitting UTHER.
UTHER: You saved my boy! How to repay you...I know! I’ll give you one of the most important, trusted positions in the kingdom even though I literally know nothing about you!
MERLIN: Um…
ARTHUR: Um…
UTHER: Sorted!
GAIUS: Here, MERLIN, have a book of MAGIC. I’m sure you won’t get in any trouble with it at all.
MERLIN: Trouble? Me? As if.
NEXT WEEK:
There is trouble.