Chapter Text
Things were a bit strange after their identity reveal. At first he seemed almost giddy and unable to feel glooby but after a while Tenna had been quite… composed; almost too much so.
It was strange to see the flamboyant and extroverted man become quiet and withdrawn. He did his job and disappeared again.
A lot had happened.
The Lightners had come and Tenna lost it again but Susie could luckily calm him down. They temporarily evacuated to Castle Town before they could return home.
Things were a bit different but it was still TV Town, even if the world was a bit more contained. Only a temporary solution.
Sometimes, he’d just stare at them as if he expected something that never came but brushed it off when they asked if he needed anything.
Surreal.
That was how Battat had described it in the beginning but now he considered it worrisome. Tenna wasn’t like this and as peaceful as life in the studio was, his subdued personality was not helping the show itself and they’d be heading for another financial crisis if this kept up.
The green Pippins pondered what to do and stood in front of the theory board. The most likely reason would be what had happened between them because it started at the same time but there was the question of why that would be the reason if they had solved the situation and even exchanged some very platonic affection.
He blushed.
Of course it had been platonic just like his relationship with Pluey and Jongler. A queer, platonic and poly relationship. That’s how Pluey called it and he could only wonder where he learned those words even if it described things well.
It was probably just about the Lightners, nothing else.
Mippins shook his head. ‘Stop that…’ He thought. ‘…you are not in a relationship with Tenna. ’ He reminded himself. That was a one time thing to make up for everything and Tenna only did it to keep Mike.
He wanted Mike. He didn’t want a Pippins.
He would only make things more complicated by reading into it unnecessarily. They had unanimously agreed to go back to the way things were before.
Mike continued to do his job and the three men behind the mask would stay out of Tenna’s business; he should be happy.
It bothered him that Tenna was very distant all of a sudden despite that. He hardly asked Mike for favours anymore and offered them polite greetings out of costume but never approached them otherwise either.
The green Pippins decided that it would be best to just bring him his tea as usual and try to get information that way.
As much as the show host loved to perform and could be a great actor or manipulator, he was also an open book who wore his emotions on his sleeve.
Especially Battat had developed quite the skill for reading and improving his boss’ mood swings but that was before the identity reveal, he appeared more guarded now and simply dismissed all of their attempts to address this issue.
Why couldn’t he just tell them? That way they could help him with whatever was on his mind. Or were they the problem? Did he decide that he didn’t want the fake Mikes after all?
The neurotic, little Pippins shook his head and slapped both of his cheeks to keep focused. “Stop overthinking this, Battat! Just bring Tenna his tea and talk to him about this!” He hyped himself up and got into costume when Jongler entered the room.
“Boss? Gettin’ ready to bring Tenna his cuppa tea?” They asked, appearing a bit nervous.
“As I do every evening… he’s been sending me off these past days but I am entering that room today!” The die scoffed.
“Be careful…” Jongler warned him. “…he’s got a bad mood dis afternoon. Already send off Pluey and I don’t want yous guys get hurt.”
“That bad?” Battat asked concerned. “I mean, he promised not to hurt us… Pluey isn’t injured, right?”
“No… I dunno. He just seems off, please be careful, boss.” The Zapper asked of him.
-
Mike was a bit wary after the warning but didn’t want to feel scared of Tenna, that would only make his care seem less genuine and the CRT would be able to tell.
And he was genuine, he did care but he would be lying if he said that Tenna’s outburst didn’t affect his trust in the taller Darkner.
The situation with Kris and the others didn’t help either but they agreed collectively to let bygones be bygones.
He wanted to just go back to being his assistant, his friend if possible. That would be enough. He didn’t need more even if part of him wanted more, especially after they shared a kiss, one Tenna seemed to refuse to acknowledge as if he didn’t like it.
He probably didn’t like it. He was much too small, even smaller than Spamton was when he still worked at the studio and he wasn’t very handsome either according to the other Pippins.
Would he look better if he was red like the rest of them? Was it his tired and off-putting face compared to the energetic and happy one of other die? He rarely smiled, not in the way other Pippins did; his own smile was more subtle and content than cheerful or excited.
Even if he got excited, he would seem more manic and weird than cute.
In the beginning his co-workers had told him to smile more but now they just avoided talking to him. At least the worst of them got fired, so he could focus on his work without interruptions.
A part of him was concerned about repercussions or some of the other employees getting suspicious but it seemed no one missed those guys.
In fact, a few Pippins became more friendly towards him but he had no interest in friends who only wanted to be with him when it was convenient. He preferred Pluey and Jongler as his closest and only friends.
He wouldn’t be opposed to adding a certain show host but that wouldn’t even happen in his wildest fantasies.
Battat’s thoughts were running rampant in his head and he didn’t even notice that he walked into the door. It was loud enough that it spared him to knock at least because he could hear Tenna jump out of his chair and move quickly towards the door.
“Mike?” He asked confused and scooped him up. “Everything alright?”
Mike nodded and shook his head to regain his bearings. “Yeah… yes, I’m deeply sorry, Mister Tenna. I wasn’t paying attention.” The costumed die sighed.
“Mhm…” Tenna eyed him before he nodded. “Yeah… what are you even doing here?” The CRT asked and shifted awkwardly in place. “Make it snappy, I’m busy.”
Mike stared at him blankly; even without eyes, the glare penetrated his mask’s fabric with ease. His confidence dropped when he realised that he forgot the tea. “I’m sorry, I wanted to bring your afternoon tea… I was in thoughts and forgot… I…” He never forgot his Mike routine. What was going on with him. “Let me get it.”
Tenna stopped the shorter one and seemed to think the same because his expression softened and became almost guilty. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“That should be my question.” Mike shot back and frowned.
“Huh?” He looked at him confused.
“You seem on edge and a bit moody lately, especially towards Mike.” The microphone crossed his arms.
“A-am I? I… it wasn’t on purpose.” He said and sounded almost afraid. “I’m sorry, please don’t leave me, I try to do better.” He got on his knees.
Mike was a bit confused. “Tenna…?” He asked. “What are you… we’re not leaving.” He reassured him and tried to figure out the cause of this strange behaviour. ‘I thought he was mad?’
“Oh… thank goodness.” He said with a relieved but awkward laugh. “I was worried.”
“Why…?” He asked confused.
“You… never come by anymore…” The CRT shrunk a bit.
“Tenna… what are you talking about. We come by every day.” Mike explained and wondered whether Tenna’s memory loss was getting worse. How old was Tenna? Could a TV get dementia?
“Mike comes by…” The man mumbled.
“Because that’s what Mike does, you wanted him… well, us… you know! You wanted Mike to continue his job.” It was weird to talk about the other two and himself in third person towards Tenna.
“Exactly… Mike comes by and does his job… and then he leaves until I need him again.” Anthony shifted awkwardly in place and shrunk some more, all his intimidation was out of the window.
“I don’t understand.” Mippins admitted.
Tenna turned red in embarrassment and seemed frustrated. “Dammit, why are you so… well, fine!” He grabbed Mike and ignored the indignant squeak from his second in command when he dropped him on the couch.
The large man snapped his fingers and made it look the same as when Mike brought him tea. There were two cups that filled themselves with each of their favourite flavours in an instant.
“There.” Tenna huffed and sat down to pout.
Mike was taken aback and awkwardly smiled up at Tenna. “Do you want to talk…?” He flinched when his boss clapped his hands together without warning.
“Yes! Oh, Mike. I thought you’d never ask.” His tone was overly friendly and Battat figured it might be best to play along.
“Lay it on me, boss.” He tried to nudge him in the usual Mike manner but couldn’t quite pull it off.
Tenna’s mood seemed to improve a bit and he nodded eagerly at that. “Well, you see… there is someone who is giving me a headache.”
Mike nodded, intrigued now that he might learn something new. “Go on?”
“They’ve been lying to me for a long time.” Tenna started and stared into the herbal liquid. “And when I found out… I got really… really angry.” The machine explained.
‘Uh-oh.’ Battat swallowed nervously. “Is that so?”
The CRT nodded. “I… hurt them a lot… physically… mentally… I ruined the remaining trust we still had because I couldn’t control my emotions…” The man explained and shrunk to the size of a regular adult man. “And I was scared that they might hate me after that…”
“Tenna…” Battat reached out but stopped when his superior shifted away to continue.
“They came to me and we spend an evening together. It felt… normal.” The man’s antennas hung low enough that they might as well fall off. “And I was happy.” His hands were shaking and barely held onto the cup. “I was very… very happy…” His screen began to leak as it turned black, the only expression a white frown. “… truly happy…for the first time since he left me.”
The green die felt a pit form in his stomach.
“But after that… they never came again. They never came together… only Mike came back and he was distant. He did his job and left… every time… and I just want to know…” He looked at his cohort with a wobbly smile that was clearly forced and poorly hid his sorrow. “…do they hate me? Wasn’t I good enough when they gave me a chance?”
Mike was dumbfounded and stared at the TV, he wanted to say something but his throat felt dry and made no sound.
“I was just hoping we could be friends…” Tenna quickly jumped off the couch and laughed, his screen returned to normal after quickly wiping away any remaining tears. “B-but that’s a stupid thing to lose my head over!” He laughed more, it sounded so forced that it was easy to forget how good of an actor he could be when his emotions didn’t make his thoughts and feelings blatant to anyone with a single working braincell.
“How could…” He shrunk more. “…anyone…” And more. “…want to be friends…” He became smaller than a Pippins. “…with someone as despicable as me.” Smaller. “Someone broken…” Ant-sized. “…worthless…” He dropped on his side, legs close to his chest and his antennas over his screen in an attempt to hide the tears. “…like me.”
Mippins frowned, unsure whether he should console him as Mike or himself. Did it even matter? Apparently it did make quite a difference to Tenna.
Battat stepped closer and watched the shrunken CRT, careful to avoid triggering him and get either of them hurt. “Boss…” He kneeled down and hesitantly scooped him up. “We don’t hate you… we actually like you a lot and that shows why we felt betrayed when you had your breakdown and wanted to hurt us… but you’re doing your best to make up for it and we understand that you need help to get better.” He smiled when Tenna grew to the size of a Pippins.
“I don’t want to keep hurting people.” He mumbled. “I don’t want get hurt anymore or watch people hurt each other.” He tugged on his antennas when Mike grabbed his hands to keep them in place.
“Stop.” The assistant ordered before pulling the CRT into a hug. “I don’t want to see you hurt either.”
Tenna flinched when the other man raised his voice at him and melted into the embrace. After a moment of hesitation, he grew again and looked down at Mike with a timid expression, his fingers coiled around the small body and seemed to prod at the seams of the costume.
Mippins tensed up, nervous at how close he was to those large claws that had tried to rip him apart only a week ago. “B-boss?” He asked meekly and watched the fingers halt suddenly.
The large Darkner didn’t hesitate for long before he continued, nudging the man gently to offer reassurance while offering a soft smile. “Call me Anthony.”
The Pippins nodded slowly. “Well… you can— woah.” He got raised dangerously close to the screen, staring directly at those deadly fangs. Tenna was clearly not in a good mood even if he tried to hide it.
“Take it off...” He said.
Battat blushed inside the costume while his heart accelerated into the stratosphere. “Alright…” He agreed to comply with Tenna’s wishes but the alarm bells in head were ringing. This was his last line of defence, a shield not only in the form of cushions but also his confidence.
The green die took off his mask, staring directly at the CRT before getting out of the rest of the costume.
Tenna tossed it out of sight and seemed to inspect him. “We see again… Batsy…” He smiled and tilted his head.
‘Oh god, why is this so…’ Battat interrupted his own line of thought and hid his face; he felt so naked and vulnerable. “W-why…?” He added out loud after a moment.
Tenna seemed confused and looked away in shame. “I want what you have as well…” His antennas dropped. “Seeing you three worry about each other was quite heartwarming and having your friends willing to start a fruitless fight. I was just hoping that… you know…” He laughed awkwardly.
He was a bit unnerved that he was aware of their power imbalance and spoke so nonchalantly about it but decided not to comment. It might actually be good that he was aware and willing to be more careful, so they wouldn’t get hurt accidentally.
That was the least concerning option.
“Do you want help with making friends?” Battat asked confused.
Tenna’s antennas dropped and his shoulders followed. “Oh… I mean… … I guess.”
“I’m not very good at that though. Jongler and Pluey are my only friends.” Battat admitted and was confused when Tenna seemed glooby, as if he was hurt. He made that injured puppy face that he wore when he heard something sad.
“Oh… I see.” He mumbled. “I got it.” His voice sounded different, seemingly trailing off. “I’m sorry that I even asked, that wasn’t appropriate.” His screen darkened and he shrunk again. “It would be better if you left now. I’m not feeling too great.”
“Alright…” The little die was confused and just nodded. “Well… you can call for Mike if you need anything.” He reassured him but it didn’t seem to improve his mood.
“Right… Mike.” He mumbled and picked up the costume before carelessly shoving it against the green Pippin’s chest, causing the shorter man to stumble back a bit. “Goodnight.” The still slightly taller man ushered him outside and Battat complied.
Mippins was between intimidated and annoyed, not sure why Tenna was acting this way with him but deciding it was best to just comply even though they didn’t even have any tea yet.
“Are you su—“ Battat tried again.
“Goodnight.” Tenna reiterated and grew, then showed off his fangs while he clenched his clawed fists.
Battat just nodded and quickly scurried towards the door. “G-Goodnight, Mr. Tenna.”
The door closed and the Lord of Screen was left alone again. Alone. Again. All alone. Again. Again. Again. He clawed at his head and whimpered. Why was he like that? Why was he unable to get close to anyone?
He just wanted to ask to hang out but he blew it. Battat clearly didn’t want him around. Could he even blame him? He was a terrible boss and an even worse partner. His last - and first - partner disappeared from the face of the earth just to escape him.
No one loved him.
He didn’t even love himself, how could he expect anyone else to bear his presence? Especially when he was old and useless.
Battat must think he’s a fool for trying to become part of their group. To be part of something good and healthy for once, something supportive.
But he’d only drag them down.
He’d be a glooby downer and ruin everything anyway, he would be better off if he was never plugged in and never experienced this pain.
He hadn’t even noticed that he was crying, his screen leaked and he wished to love him and hold him. He wanted a hug. He needed one do badly but no one would come, there was no comfort for him in the Dark World. Not in Cyber World with Spamton and not in his own with Mike.
Because Mike wasn’t real.
It was at most a job position now.
That meant his friendship with Mike wasn’t real either and everything had been a lie. He sobbed while his staticky screen leaked on the floor and he remembered Battat’s words.
Jongler and Pluey are my only friends.
He should have known.
It was clear from the way they avoided him, everything else was just manipulation.
But it still hurt.
It stung deep in his chest and the thought alone made something inside him break as he sunk to the floor and hugged his legs in a fetal position.
He was the worst.
He should just stay there on the ground and rust, corrode like scrap metal and disappear.
They hated him.
They only did it for the money.
Just like Spamton.
Oh, he missed him so much. He missed Mike too; when he believed that Mike was his friend, that he was real. That someone could care about him despite everything.
A dream. A wish. A lie.
All of this was futile and meaningless.
Everything life had for him was pain and disappointment and now here he was: crying alone, just like so many nights before.