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It all starts with Amy looking for Sonic.
It’s not an abnormal situation. In fact, it’s quite common, as is the fact that Sonic’s avoiding her messages on his communicator. It’s also quite common for him to do this with Knuckles. And Rouge’s (admittedly halfhearted) attempts. And basically every other one of his friends.
There are, of course, exceptions to this. Exactly two, in fact, though admittedly for very different reasons.
Shadow and Tails.
“No.”
“Please!” Amy practically begs, hands clasped. Shadow rolls his eyes, crossing his arms, because for some reason, he’s always twice the jerk he normally is the second Sonic is involved. “It’s for his birthday party!”
“Well, if you want to know what he wants for it, it’s for as many people as possible to be there and a bunch of trash to eat. Go check his Green Hill burrow or something and leave me alone. I don’t want to have to think about that hedgehog any more than I have to.” Amy blinks. Um.
“His… burrow?” Shadow scoffs, crossing his arms.
“Yes, his burrow. You…“ Shadow takes a moment to take a good look at Amy’s face. “…didn’t know about that, did you?”
”Since when has he had a-“ Shadow pivots and immediately starts gliding away, very quickly getting to a speed that leaves Amy unable to follow. “Hey! Shadow! Get back here!” Shadow, of course, does not return. And Amy, of course, goes to the next best option for information on this, original objective very firmly on the back burner.
“Tails!”
“Ah!” There’s a thump, and moments later, Tails appears, rubbing the back of his head with a slight scowl that drops for a friendly smile when he notices Amy. “Oh, hi, Amy! Whatcha up to? And before you ask, Sonic’s not here.”
“I know that,” Amy says, waving him off. He looks vaguely confused by this statement, but Amy pays that no mind. After all, why wouldn’t she know that? “Does Sonic have a burrow?”
“Does Sonic have a what? Why would he have one of those?” Tails somehow manages to look even more confused than Amy feels, which is saying something. Sonic’s refusal to find a proper place to live borders on legendary, with him going so far as to refuse to stay with someone for more than two nights in a row. Amy figured that he probably just slept on the ground somewhere, running to wherever it’s dry if it’s raining. She figures this because she’s seen it. Multiple times. So if he actually has a burrow… “Did someone say something? Because they’re probably messing with you.”
“Shadow’s the one that said it.”
“Ah. So not messing with you then. Hm…” Tails frowns, clearly thinking hard. Unfortunately, he seems to come up with nothing. “Did he say anything else?” Amy tilts her head, tapping her chin.
“Well, he did call it his ‘Green Hill burrow’, so. At least we know what area it’s in?”
“If he doesn’t have them scattered everywhere so he can nap whenever he wants.” Tails groans, putting his hand to his head. “Of course he has a burrow! Why wouldn’t he?!”
“I know! And we wouldn’t’ve even know if Shadow didn’t think I already knew!” Amy huffs, crossing her arms. “This is so frustrating!”
“You’re telling me! Ugh! I have a weekly reminder on my calendar telling me to offer him a place to live! And he knows about it!”
”Weekly? Mine’s monthly!”
“Yes, and Knuckle’s is yearly. Can we focus!”
“On what? We don’t know where it is!”
“On presenting a united front when we confront him about it! Obviously!”
“Confront who about what?” Both Tails and Amy jerk towards the doorway to the garage to see Sonic leaning against the doorframe. “Is it something juicy?”
“Since when did you have a burrow?!” Tails shouts. Sonic blinks once. Twice. A third time. Then he turns and sprints away. “Sonic! Come on!” Sonic, of course, doesn’t return. Tails turns to Amy, gesturing at the now empty doorway. “That’s why we need a plan!”
So they do make a plan, which essentially boils down to “wait until there’s a bunch of people around and hope at least one of them will be able to stop Sonic when he tries to run away” and “meet up later to come up with a better plan”. That later comes the next day, and with it…
“I’m just saying, he’s going to keep avoiding us until he figures out some sort of workaround for whatever we can come up with!” Amy fumes. Tails slams his hands against the table at the little cafe they’re eating at that has very good croissants, which both of them are indulging in.
“And I’m saying that if I invent something new between now and when we see him, then-“
“Amy! Tails!” Both Amy and Tails turn around in shock as Sonic skids to a stop in front of them. “Who told you about it? Was it Shadow? Please tell me it was Shadow.”
“I- about what?” Amy cries. Sonic rolls his eyes, crossing his arms.
“About the burrows, obviously!” He says as if it’s the most obvious thing ever. Which it is not. It’s up there, yes, but not at the top spot! “Honestly, Ames, given how you two are scheming about it, I’d assume it was on your mind.”
“Burrows? So there’s multiple?!” Tails shrieks.
“Who said that? I didn’t say that. You didn’t hear anything, and if you did, you’re crazy,” Sonic fires back, still staring at Amy expectantly. “So it was Shadow, right? Right?”
“Tell me where it is and I’ll tell you,” Amy bargains. Sonic nods quickly.
“Alright, fine, but you have to tell me his exact wording. It’s important. Very important. Extremely important.”
“What, so you can know how many of your burrows are compromised?”
”I KNEW IT!” Sonic whirls around, pointing at the newly appeared Shadow. “Snitch!” Shadow scoffs, crossing his arms.
“Sorry I didn’t realize you were the type to keep where you live from your friends. As if it’s my fault.”
“You know why I didn’t tell them! You’ve been there!” Shadow just looks at Sonic.
“To at least one, yes.”
“No, to at least five! I’ve seen your quills lying around! And they’re all like that, you have to know that!”
”Five? He has at least five burrows?!” Tails squeaks. Shadow scoffs.
“You’ve only seen them at five? Pathetic.” Sonic scoffs right back, mirroring the whole “crossed arm and dramatically posed” thing Shadow has going on for at least fifty percent of the time, including right now.
“Well, it’s not like I go to most of them that often!” Shadow nods once.
“Yes, I’ve noticed.” He narrows his eyes at Sonic. “They’re dirty.”
“Okay? Stay somewhere else.” His eyes narrow further.
“No.” Sonic snorts.
“Okay, burglar."
“Inaccurate. The entering of a property can’t be illegal if the property isn’t legally acknowledged.” Shadow eyes Sonic. “Especially if calling it a burrow is a stretch.” Sonic gives him a look.
“Well, are you going to get some legal chump down there to make note of it?”
“Why would I? They’re your burrows.”
“So they are burrows?”
“In a pinch.”
“What nonsense are you boys arguing about now?”
“Nothing!” Both Sonic and Shadow exclaim as they turn to the newly appeared Rouge. Amy’s not having it, though.
“Sonic has at least five burrows and Shadow knew about it. And neither will tell us where they are.” Shadow shoots Amy a deadly look.
“Snitch.”
“Huh. I always wondered where he crashed after our missions,” Rouge muses. Then she grins at Shadow. “Tell me, is a dusty old burrow really better than a five star hotel provided by G.U.N.’s coin? Or is it something else?” Shadow shifts.
“I’ve told you. Hotels freak me out.”
“So my burrows don’t freak you out? Aw, Shads, what a nice thing to say!” Sonic cries. Shadow scoffs, rolling his eyes.
“I never said that.” Sonic just gives him a look.
“So do they freak you out?” Shadow stiffens, then looks away.
“They’re passable,” he allows with a mumble. Sonic pumps his fist.
“Woo! Best thing anyone’s ever said about any of ‘em!”
“Yeah, because none of us know where they are!” Tails shouts. Sonic waves him off.
“Yeah, yeah. The one in Green Hill has an entrance hidden about halfway up towards the loop. You’re not getting in, though.”
“Like heck I’m not!” Tail exclaims, extra indignant. Shadow sighs.
“No, you’re not. Not unless you have at least a day and get lucky, and even then, there’s a good chance you’d have to wait for one of us to get there to get you out. Which I’m not doing.”
“And I’m never there!” Sonic adds cheerfully “So good luck! There’s no food down there!”
“You don’t have food in your burrows?!” Tails shouts. Sonic shrugs.
“It really is a stretch to call them that. In fact, I wouldn’t even be doing it if he-“ He points at Shadow. “-hadn’t first.” Shadow rolls his eyes.
“Whatever.”
“Anyway, gotta run! Shads, wanna come with?” Shadow scoffs.
“Wha- hey, no! Explain??” Amy tries to interrupt. Unfortunately, she is ignored, much to both her and Tails’ frustration.
“And why would I want to do that?” Shadow asks Sonic, who shrugs.
“I’m going to buy some extra bedding for the burrows. You can pick it out if you come with.”
"Sonic!" Tails tries to interrupt, but is also ignored. Rouge looks like she's having the time of her life.
“Why do you need that?” Shadow acts like he’s offended by the implication that more than one Mobian might be in a burrow at once. Which, well. He might be.
“Well, if we end up at the same one at some point, I don’t wanna just kick you out, so some extra bedding would be helpful!” Sonic grins, leaning closer. “Unless you wanna shareee.”
“Never with you, hedgehog.” Shadow pauses, mulling it over, during which Amy once again tries to interrupt and it once again doesn't work. “You’re paying,” he decides.
“What!” Tails shouts, and is ignored.
“Was always gonna!” Sonic cheers.
“Shadow,” Rouge interjects, hand on her hip as she narrows her eyes at Shadow, who narrows his back, mirroring her pose. Then, after a good ten seconds of this silent staring contest, Shadow deflates.
“I’ll pick up takeout for you. And pay for it.”
“Ah, that's so kind of you! See you tonight, yes?” Shadow nods once.
“Wait, no!” Tails shouts as Sonic and Shadow ready themselves to run. Sonic glances at him. “Sonic…” Sonic sighs.
“Check it out yourself if you want to.”
“That’s not what he was trying to say! You worried us!” Amy cries. Sonic just shrugs.
“And I told you not to.” Even Shadow seems a bit incredulous at this blatant display of emotional stupidity, which is really, really saying something. Amy wants to scream in frustrations. Tails actually does.
“That’s not how it works! Especially when we think you have nowhere to stay!” He shouts.
“It should be. And if I did, what’s the problem? It’s hardly different than what I’m doing now.”
“Ugh!” Tails cries.
“You’re not helping, Blue,” Rouge says, frowning. Sonic shrugs.
“I’m not looking to be helpful.” Before anyone can say anything to this even more blatant display of emotional stupidity, Sonic turns to Shadow. “Race ya!” And with that, they’re off. Tails slams his head against the table.
”Ugh!” He shouts. Rouge sighs, taking a second to stare after the two speedsters before turning back to Amy and Tails.
“Since it seems I was left behind, mind if I join this little party?”
"Get a crossiant, and I'll allow it," Amy tells her.
After they finish at the cafe, Amy and Tails decide to go straight to the Green Hill burrow, Rouge tagging along for “something juicy”, though, despite the fact she’s only tried to bribe Sonic into staying with her for a bit once (it had been a really, really snowy season, and Tails had to practically beg her. Sonic told her that if she could get Shadow to ask him, he’d do it. Shadow had refused. For three months straight, or all the way up until winter ended. At the time, Amy thought Sonic had specified Shadow to get under his skin; now she wants to punch both of them), Amy thinks she might be a bit annoyed as well.
“What do you see?” Amy shouts, staring up at where both Tails and Rouge are flying up to take a look at the supposed entrance Sonic had told them about. Suddenly, Tails shrieks, zipping back. Rouge, who was only a few feet behind him blinks a couple of times before descending. “What? What happened?!”
“Nothing!” Tails shouts, zipping back to the spot he was just running away from and, without hesitation, disappearing into whatever gap just had him flying away. Rouge clears her throat. Amy looks over to her to see her holding out her hand, looking expectant.
"You know, I'm not used to being the most ignored thing around. When I'm not stealing something, of course." Amy takes it, and is immediately lifted up.
“Now what’s got you so- oh, Chaos.”
“-othing! Come and get- ah!”
“Idiot.”
“I saw you do the exact same thing on the way in!”
“You’ve done it twice.”
“And you did it twice at the last- ack!” Suddenly Sonic appears crouched beside them, skidding backwards to a stop with that wide grin he only ever seems to get when he’s in the middle of a fight. “Oh, that’s more like it!”
“SONIC!” Tails shouts. Sonic starts.
“Tails?! You-" In a red blur, Shadow appears, tackling Sonic. "Oof!”
“Distract, Sonic? In the middle of a fight? Shameful.”
“Hey! Not my fault!” Sonic cries, attempting to gesture towards Tails. Unfortunately, Shadow’s got him entirely pinned, so it’s not very successful.
“Why’s your burrow after one of those weird obstacle course things Eggman makes to keep you away from stuff?!” Shadow freezes, slowly turning around to where Tails, Rouge, and Amy are all standing. As far away from the spike pit littered with disabled Eggman robots as they can get.
Sonic, of course, takes this as an opportunity to flip over him and Shadow so that he’s on top.
“Now who’s distracted?” He teases before redirecting his attention to Tails as Shadow struggles underneath him. “And why wouldn’t I? It’s not like they’ve ever succeeded.”
“But they’re still dangerous! You can’t risk yourself like that every time you go home!”
“Home is a very strong word for this place,” Shadow mutters.
“The spikes aren’t even spiky anymore!” Sonic complains, shifting backwards.
“The springs are,” Shadow says.
“Only if you bounce on the wrong spot,” Sonic fires back.
“Which you do.”
“Which you do!” Narrowing his eyes, Shadow surges forwards, but Sonic ducks out of the way before he can make contact, getting to his feet in record time, readying himself for a fight.
“Take me to it!” Tails demands.
“Wait, what?” Sonic turns to him. Shadow attempts to take advantage of Sonic’s distraction, but Sonic’s very easily able to step out of the way, giving him an exaggerated pitying look as he does. “Doing the same trick twice, faker? You running out of ideas?”
“I’ll show you running out of ideas,” Shadow grows, readying himself to pouncing Sonic.
“Take me to your burrow! The actual burrow part!” Tails interrupts. Both of them falter, staring at Tails like he’s crazy. Amy sort of agrees, but also:
“Me, too!” She cries. “I need to know what sort of place convinced you to set down roots!”
“Didn’t know two sleeping pads, two pillows, and five blankets counts as setting down roots. Fine,” he allows, shooting Shadow a look that has him straightening from his fight-ready position from before. “There won’t be a lot of room, though.” He then nudges Shadow. “Ready?” Uh.
“Always, faker,” Shadow hisses, and that’s about as much warning as Amy gets before she’s snatched by Shadow, and they’re off, Sonic and a (happily. Very happily) shrieking Tails by their side, step by glide.
Shockingly, they aren’t there right away. No, no. It takes at least three minutes. Which, well, isn’t a lot, but it is enough for Amy to know Shadow was severely underestimating how long it’d take a normal Mobian to get the very ends of the burrow. Or, well, “burrow”. This definitely doesn’t count. It especially doesn’t count when they get to the end, because-
“What?! This is it?!” Tails exclaims, hopping off of Sonic’s back as Shadow sets Amy down. The exclamation seems to be about the only thing keeping Sonic and Shadow from shouting at each other about who won the race or whatever. Sonic laughs, rubbing the fur on the top of Tails’ head as Amy glances around. It’s… well. It’s small, it’s cramped, and it has exactly two sleep mats, two pillows, and five blankets, which is good, because that’s about all that fits. In fact, Sonic and Tails are even standing on one of the mats simply due to the fact that not all four of them could fit unless at least two of them were. Yeah, definitely not burrow material, let alone home.
“‘Course this is it! If it was anything important, you’d know already! You know that.” Tails crosses his arms, looking away.
“But Shadow knew,” he mumbles.
“That’s because Shadow’s nosey,” Sonic explains, looking deceptively innocent. A look that’s shattered into a grin the second Shadow reaches out to punch his shoulder. “Now can we go? I’m getting claustrophobic.”
“Wimp,” Shadow helpfully supplies.
“Oh, so you want to stay here? With all of us? All at once? Wow, Shads, didn’t realize you-“ Before Amy can even blink, Shadow's picked her back up, and is running back towards the entrance.
"So? How was it leaving me back here?" Rouge asks when they reappear back at the beginning of the "burrow", arms crossed.
"I'll pay for your takeout twice," Shadow offers. Rouge's eyes narrow.
"Thrice, and I don't tell anyone you're living with Blue."
"I am not-"