Chapter Text
i asked her to stay,
but she wouldn't listen.
and she left before i had the chance to say,
the words that would mend, the things that were broken.
but now it's far too late,
she's gone away.
the car cruises through the empty night, the hum of the engine the only sound. the tension in the air between them is palpable, thick with unspoken words. steven glances over at taylor every few seconds, his hands tight on the wheel, but she's staring out the window, arms crossed tightly over her chest. taylor’s trying to shrink into herself, by pulling away from him to try and make things less complicated.
"taylor," he says, his voice soft, unsure. "i broke up with mia."
she doesn't respond right away. her gaze stays fixed on the road ahead, her lips pressed into a thin line. when she does turn to look at him, it's only for a moment, her eyes meeting his before she turns away again. the disbelief in her eyes is almost painful to see, but she says nothing at first. she just blinks, shakes her head slowly, can't believe what she's hearing.
"i hope you didn't do that for me," she says quietly, the words so soft, so fragile, she's afraid to say them. as if voicing her fear will make it real.
steven's chest tightens, confusion and hurt flooding him. "what? no. i thought— i thought you'd be happy. i thought maybe you'd want to be with me too. after everything that happened... after the other night, when i stayed over."
taylor closes her eyes briefly, her jaw tightening, and for a second, steven feels like she's pulling even further away, like she's already shutting him out. "steven," she says, her voice clipped, controlled. "you're wrong. i've told you before, i just want this to be casual."
it hits him like a slap. casual? that's all this has been to her? something temporary? he feels the anger rising, but it's not just anger. it's frustration, hurt, the ache of someone trying to get close to someone who's just... too scared to let them in. he shakes his head, his grip tightening on the wheel.
"what? no. it's never casual with you and me, taylor. you know that."
she pushes her head back against the seat, her fingers pulling at the fabric of her sweater like she's trying to ground herself. "oh my god," she mutters, closing her eyes.
"let's just stop fucking around and make it real," he says, desperation creeping into his voice. "so we don't keep hurting other people."
she lets out a bitter laugh, but it's a sound more like disbelief than humor. "they don't even know about us!" she spits, shaking her head as she stares out the window again. the frustration in her voice cuts through the air like a knife.
"that doesn't matter," he snaps, trying to hold onto something, anything. "it's still messed up. you know it is. why do you keep running from this?"
the silence stretches between them, and it feels like they're both choking on it. steven wants to reach out, wants to tell her that he just wants her—just her—but the words feel stuck in his throat, as if he's afraid to say the wrong thing.
"taylor, i want us to have a fresh start," he says "i want us to be free of all this shit. i want it to just be you and me. clean. free. clear."
she looks at him for a moment, her eyes flickering with something he can't name. maybe hope. maybe fear. but then she shuts it down, quick and sharp. "we've tried before," she says, her voice tight, almost accusing. "we tried a million times, and it never works."
"we were kids," steven says, his voice soft, but there's an edge to it. "we're not kids anymore."
"we don't work, steven," she says, dragging her hand over her face, exhaustion pulling at her features. "we never work. i can't keep doing this."
the words hit him like a punch to the gut. she's already done. and the worst part is, he knows it's because she's terrified. terrified of letting him in, terrified of getting hurt again.
he feels something inside of him snap, the desperation clawing at his throat. "you're the only girl i want to be with," he says, voice firm, though the fear is crawling under the surface.
she drags her hand down her face, her shoulders slumping as if the weight of everything is too much. she wants to fight him, she wants to stay, but the fear is too strong, the walls she's built around herself are too thick. "i can't do this," she says, her voice trembling, but she's not sure if it's from fear or frustration. "i just can't, okay?"
"what are you talking about?" he asks, his voice cracking, panic creeping in. "you can't just walk away from me like this."
she shakes her head, tears welling up in her eyes, but she quickly blinks them away. "pull over," she says, her voice rough. "let me out of the car, steven."
the words hit him like a slap. he doesn't know what to do. part of him wants to beg her to stay, but the other part knows that nothing he says will change it. "taylor, no, i need you to listen to me, please."
but her patience is gone, her voice rising now, raw and angry. "no, steven. i just— i want out. pull over, and let me out of the fucking car!"
he swears under his breath, slamming his fist against the steering wheel. "fine," he mutters. "fine! fuck!"
he pulls the car to the side of the road, the tires screeching slightly as he jerks it to a stop. the moment the car halts, taylor is already out of the seat, slamming the door with such force that the sound rattles in his chest. she storms off, not looking back, disappearing into the night.
"taylor, what the fuck?" he yells after her, his voice full of raw panic. his heart is pounding so loudly he can barely hear anything else. his chest tightens, and before he even thinks, he's throwing the car into drive and chasing after her.
the sound of a horn blaring behind him snaps him out of his frantic thoughts. he whips his head around just in time to see the headlights of another car coming up fast. the car swerves, trying to avoid him, but in doing so, it veers off course and heads straight for taylor.
her head jerks around at the sound, her eyes widening with terror. she doesn't have time to react. the car hits the curb, swerving right into her path.
taylor tries to move, tries to get out of the way, but it's too late. she's thrown off her feet, her body slamming into the pavement with a sickening thud.
"taylor!" steven screams, his voice breaking as he slams on the brakes. the car comes to a screeching stop, and before it even fully stops, he's out of the car, running toward her, his legs barely keeping up with his panicked thoughts.
steven reaches her and drops to his knees and he pulls her gently into his arms, the terror clawing at him. "taylor, stay with me, please." his hands tremble as he touches her face, brushing strands of hair away from her forehead, but she doesn't move. "please, don't—don't do this."
he's shaking. he doesn't know what to do. his mind is racing, but nothing seems to make sense. how could this be happening?
"shit—shit—taylor, please!" his voice cracks, louder now, desperation lacing every word. he scoops her up as best as he can, his hands shaking with fear, but she's limp in his arms. he pulls her against him, feeling the weight of her body in a way he never has before. he's never felt so powerless, so terrified.
"please, just stay with me, taylor. i need you to stay with me. i can't lose you." the words spill out of him, broken and raw. tears well up in his eyes, but he doesn't wipe them away. he doesn't even care anymore. all that matters is getting her the help she needs, getting her out of here before the world keeps falling apart.
he reaches for his phone, fumbling with it, but his hands won't stop shaking. the screen feels like it's slipping through his fingers, but somehow, he manages to dial 911, his voice hoarse as he gives their location. "please, hurry," he says, the words coming out strangled.
as he waits, he holds her close, her blood staining his shirt. all the words he never got to say, all the things he never told her, hang heavy between them.
"i'm sorry," he whispers into her hair, choking on the words. "i'm so sorry. i never should've let you walk away. taylor, i love you. i love you so much."
the sound of sirens in the distance brings a small sliver of relief, but it's fleeting. he doesn't know if she can hear him, but he keeps talking anyway. he just needs to hold on to her, even if it's only for a little longer.
the sirens grow louder. paramedics rush out of the vehicles, moving fast, but steven can't let go. he can't.
"please, just be okay," he whispers one more time, his hands trembling as they place her onto the stretcher. the cold, harsh reality of the situation hits him like a wall, and he feels his legs give way beneath him as he steps back. they're taking her, and he... he doesn't know if he'll ever get another chance to tell her everything.
it’s not over tonight.
just give me one more chance to make it right.
i may not make it through the night.
i won’t go home without you.