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The door slams open. Banri jolts, then shoots a glare at the offender. “Dude, what is your problem? If the wall’s got a hole in it, I am not dealing with the old man’s wrath.”
“Settsu,” Juza says, jaw tight, “I need t’ask you somethin’.”
Like that’s any sort of greeting. Banri rolls his eyes. “Yeah, what? Acting advice or whatever?”
Juza steps into their room and closes the door behind him. He gives it a furtive glance, as though making sure that no one’s managed to sneak in through the gap. Then he gestures for Banri to get down from his loft bed.
Banri, in turn, raises an unamused eyebrow. “... it can’t be that serious. Are you about to start whispering?”
“I’on want anyone hearing,” Juza mumbles, loud enough that Banri can hear him from the bed anyway. He makes another, more insistent gesture, “‘s important. Just come down already.”
Sighing, Banri acquiesces. He hops down from his bed, grabbing his phone because the good lord knows that he feels naked without it, and leans against the ladder to face Juza. “Okay, I’m down,” he says with the slow, deliberate cadence of someone who’s humoring a child. “The hell did you wanna ask me that’s so secret?”
Juza shoots Banri a glare but quickly averts his gaze. If he looks closely, Banri thinks that he sees a flush creeping up Juza’s neck. “Don’t freak out or whatever,” Juza says first as a disclaimer, pausing before he can get his next words out, “but I think… I think Taichi’s got a crush on me.”
It’s been easy to forget lately, but Banri suddenly remembers that his roommate is a certified dumbass.
“Really,” Banri says flatly. “What makes you think so.”
Not noticing Banri’s tone, or maybe just ignoring it, Juza continues hastily: “It’s— he’s been actin’ kinda weird, ‘n I thought it was just me, but he’s been real touchy ‘n kinda flirty, I guess, not that I’d really know.”
“Uh-huh.”
“He’s always touchy, it’s Taichi, but he’s been really— We were walkin’ home together the other day from uni, ‘cause we got one’ve the same classes for last period, ‘n while we were walkin’ home he was talkin’ about stuff like usual, ‘n I didn’t notice ‘til we got here but we were holdin’ hands, ‘n if I think about it we were probably holdin’ hands for like ten minutes ‘n I didn’t notice, ‘n when we got back he gave me a kiss on th’cheek, ‘n I know Taichi’s just a real affectionate guy, but I just dunno—”
Banri sighs loudly enough that Juza stops mid-sentence to give him a nasty look.
“Get to the point already,” Banri says, already half-knowing where this is going. “You said you wanted to ask me something. Then ask.”
Juza falters. “Well…”
There’s a beat of silence.
“Well?”
Juza groans and shoots Banri a second, nastier look. “Well, ‘m sorry. What should I do about it?”
Banri stares blankly at Juza. “What. How the hell should I know.”
“Aren’t y’both together?”
“No?” Banri pauses. “Well. Kinda. It’s complicated, whatever, but it’s not really exclusive or whatever, so don’t even worry about me in whatever you’re thinking about. Actually! Don’t worry about me at all. That’s gross.”
“‘m not worryin’ about you,” Juza snaps back, the flushing on his neck deepening and beginning to rise up to his cheeks. “‘s called bein’ normal. I was pretty sure I was just makin’ shit up in my head, but—”
“Oh, no, yeah. That sounds like Taichi in love, alright.”
“‘n you’re not bothered?”
Banri sighs for the second time. Or maybe it’s the third. Or the seventh. He’s lost count. “Listen,” he says, “what Taichi and I have isn’t boyfriends. It’s not just friends, either, but frankly, it’s not really any of your business. Taichi’s the kinda guy who’s got a buncha love in his heart and needs a certain kind back, ‘nd I can’t give him all that on my own, so y’all can hook up or make out or whatever, man, it’s really no big deal to me.”
Juza stares, slightly uncomprehending.
“No, I’m not bothered,” Banri says, louder this time. “But I am gonna be if you keep lookin’ at me like that. Jesus fuck, Taichi, get better taste in guys…” He shakes his head. “Well? Do you like him back or what?”
At this, the fading flush beneath Juza’s skin comes back in full force. “I— It ain’t that simple,” he manages, rubbing the back of his neck like it’s going to coax the words out for him. “‘s not that I don’t like him, but ‘s just—”
Banri groans. He knew getting his phone was a good idea. With a couple of taps, he unlocks it and announces, “I’m calling Taichi.”
“Don’t fuckin’ call—”
Juza lunges for him. Banri, caught off-guard, goes down almost immediately, unable to stabilize himself quick enough. Juza’s a big guy, but it still pisses him off that he’s able to push him down so quickly. Banri grits his teeth to sock Juza in the arm as he attempts to grab the phone back. “What the hell, get off me you fuckin’ gorilla!”
“Keep your damn mouth shut,” Juza says, holding the phone out of Banri’s reach. “Yer like a cockatoo.”
Oh HELL no.
Banri’s pretty sure that comparing him to Kamekichi in any way, no matter how indirect, probably constitutes a hate crime within the sovereign state of the Mankai Company dormitory. The sheer offense he feels is enough to make him feel warranted in attempting to knee Juza in the balls. “Give me my damn phone back!”
“Only if y’shut the fuck up and don’t call Taichi!”
“Hey, guys, what’re we up to?”
The two of them freeze. In the commotion, neither of them noticed the arrival of the worst person possible. Well— worst person for Juza, that is. In Banri’s case, it’s working out pretty well.
“Hey, Taichi,” Banri greets as Juza scrambles off him with the phone still in hand. It means that he doesn’t have enough time to smack a hand over Banri’s mouth before he can say, “Y’got a crush on Hyodo, don’tcha?”
“Settsu, I swear to fuckin’ God—”
“Oh!” Taichi’s eyes dart between them curiously. “Well, yeah, I do!”
“You need better taste, man. But whatever makes you happy, I guess.” Banri takes the opportunity to grab his phone back from the hands of a stunlocked Juza. He doesn’t even blink. It’s like he’s seriously just been frozen in place by Taichi’s nonchalant confession. Yeah, Taichi’ll do that to ya. “You two,” he says, walking to the door and nudging Taichi further into the room, “talk it out. I’m headin’ out to 103.”
“E-eh!? Um!” Taichi flounders, then gives Banri a thumbs-up. “H-have fun, Banchan!?”
It’ll be more fun where they aren’t, that’s for sure. Once Juza slowly starts to breathe again, Banri lets the door click shut quietly behind him as he leaves. Ugh. He hopes they don’t make out on his bed.
