Chapter Text
Isabeau
41 days since the King’s defeat
Odile stares at you, waiting for an answer. Her gaze makes you squeamish..
“Well, Isabeau?”
You sigh. Please, Change, anything but this conversation right now.
“Look, I get it, Sif has been acting kind of weird.”
“KIND OF?!”
Woah! You didn't expect Odile to raise her tone like that.
“M'dame! You're gonna wake the whole inn!”
…It's been over a month since Mirabelle froze the king with his own attack. Over a month since you found out your bestest bud in the whole world was stuck in a time loop for a year. Over a month since you… confessed… to him. It makes you feel warm every time you think about it.
The nurse from Dormont’s house had only recently given the ok for the party to travel. It took a whole month for Sif to finish recovering from the worst craft exhaustion that anyone had ever seen. The first stop on your new journey was traveling to Bambouche to deliver Bonbon back to their sister. Before that, everyone was stuck keeping Sif company while he healed.
NOT THAT YOU HATED IT!! But it was rough, seeing them in that state. Unable to tell you anything that happened and answer any of the questions you had about the time loop or that star person.
You wished you could've been by his side more. He was in rough shape after everything that happened. Not to mention, when he went to give the party's thanks to Loop, you found him passed out in front of the favor tree. No Loop in sight.
That first week was bad, they could barely form sentences. It was a gamble that any food they ate would stay inside him long enough to digest it.
Things started getting strange after that. During the end of the second week, they woke up, panicked, and tried to run away from the house. They only got to the hallway outside their bed before they broke down. You don’t know exactly what happened, so you did your best to reassure him. When they finally calmed down, they looked at you with such sad eyes. It was probably just a nightmare, but something in their face made you worried. It was like they thought you were a ghost or a zombie or something.
The weird stuff kept happening. Some days Sif would be like how you remembered, but other times they'd be distant. Either not saying a single word, or way too bright and cheery. But no matter the mood, they always avoided you…
Then there was tonight's incident. It was the first snowfall of winter. You had to push everyone to walk those extra kilometers to reach the next town, Voiralters. You were all exhausted, and so you thought you'd all go straight to bed as soon as you checked in at the inn's front desk. M’dame Odile, wanted to catch up on some reading in the lobby, instead. That's when she noticed Sif slinking out of the building. She found him lying in the snow, resting. And when she tried to check up on him, reach for him…
She woke you and Mira up soon after. The cut wasn't too serious. Mira healed it perfectly as always, but the fact that Sif was the one responsible, it made it look ten times worse. The party decided on Mira to go out and look for Sif. You wanted to go out and find them but…
“Look! Sif is just under a lot of stress!”
“Isabeau!”
She sighed and regained her composure. “We've all been through a lot. But it's clear Siffrin is hiding something again and not telling us. The way they're acting has made that clear.”
“But… maybe they're just trying to deal with what happened? In their own way? He still hasn't been able to talk much about what happened with the loops. Maybe he just needs more time.”
“Look, even when Siffrin was having a breakdown, and nearly destroyed the whole world… he never attacked us. Even at his lowest point.”
“What are you trying to say?”
“We learned a lot that day. Time craft, Wish craft, time loops and star people. Is it so weird to think there might be a craft to take over someone's mind? Is Siffrin still Siffrin?”
HUH?! “UM, YES? Who would they be otherwise?”
“I don't know Isabeau! That Loop character? This universe god? The King? Does it matter? Something is wrong. They're not acting right! Maybe it’s more subtle than that day, when Siffrin confronted each of us… hurt us… Something has clearly changed. Whatever is wrong, we need to fix it.”
Your body is shaking, you don't know what to say. To convince her. To convince yourself.
Thank change, the sound of the entrance bell ends the conversation. But you see Mira walk inside about to cry.
“Mira! Are you ok? Did you find Sif?”
She shakes her head, dejected.
“I-I'm Sorry Isabeau. I couldn't… I couldn't find them anywhere.”
You felt your throat tighten. Why didn’t you go out with Mira to search…………
You're not dumb, you've caught on the same things as M'dame Odile. Something is wrong with Siffrin. They weren't acting like themselves. But you didn't want to think about it because… what if was true. What if the one you loved was gone, or they still didn't trust you. After everything, they still couldn't bring themselves to trust you! You are a coward. What was the reason you quit being a defender? Because you wanted to help! Even when everyone else was too scared… You're sure showing them, huh.
Does it matter if it's Siffrin or not? There's someone out in the freezing cold and probably scared out of their mind. You swallow down your fear. Your body moves on its own and the door swings open once more.
Odile looks at you in surprise. “You know it'd be better to wait right. Siffrin isn't so foolish as to spend an entire night out-”
concern washed over her face. After the few stories Sif did share, none of you really know what they'd do.
“Perhaps we should wake some of the townsfolk for help?”
“Well…” Mira starts running a bunch of ideas through her head. “I'm sure there'd be a lot of people willing to help. But there'd also be a lot of people who'd get upset.”
Odile smirks, “I think they'll be fine if it's a request from the saviors of Vaugarde.”
Mira didn't like using the title of savior for anything but it has been useful lately. It’s not like you all had the money to stay at a cozy inn like this.
“You and Isabeau can ask for help, I'll watch over Boniface. I don't exactly do well in the cold.”
“Ok! We'll do our best to find Siffrin! And then I’m going to kick his crabbing butt until he starts talking to us!”
M'dame smirks “Good pep talk.”
You can tell Mira is trying to pump herself up. It's so cool she can push herself like that. Hopefully, it'll be enough inspiration for you too.
You and Mira step out into the night. The cold wind hits you all at once How can Sif handle cold nights like this? Mira looks so comfy in her fluffy overcoat. You really should have bought one yourself, but it was expensive, and you were hoping for an excuse to cuddle up with Sif. You hope you find him soon.
It's not long before you notice a shade In the darkless snow. It must be blood from when Sif… you push that thought into the back of your mind and continue. The snowfall already hid any footprints they might have made. With their cloak on, it's no wonder Mira couldn't find them. It was only a small town but there were still so many alleys and crevices for someone to hide in.
It's freezing out. The air bites through your clothes. The new snow layer brightens up the night, but it’s still hard to spot any details not illuminated by the street lamps. You've been knocking on any door you can. Some wake, listen to your story, do what they can to help. That good ol’ Vaugarde support is coming in real handy right now. It’s not long before twenty other people are helping you search, with some going to wake up even more. Poor Mira is feeling awful right now involving so many people, she’s doing her best to keep up a brave face. You're only starting to feel confident because of her. Voiralters is only thrice as big as Dormont. This shouldn’t take much longer. You keep telling yourself that, but it doesn’t make it more believable.
Gotta stay positive! Sure, you haven’t seen a single sign of them in an alleyway. No one has found them hiding out in a shed or under a bridge. Just stay positive, at some point a friendly face is going to shout out that they found him. Sure, a lot of the people are looking a little tired. You’re getting tired too. You should have gone to sleep hours ago. No, you can’t think like that! You’ll find Sif! No matter what!
The cold is starting to get to you. You’re feeling dizzy, ears and fingertips hurting. You want to see him again. Your throat is starting to hurt from calling out. The townsfolk all say the same thing, No sign of the savior in darkless clothes. Mira is thinking you should wait until morning before continuing. You curse under your breath each chance you're alone. Cursing at the crabbing cold, the crabbing situation, at anything to keep your mind running.
Think. Think! Where would Sif go to hide? Would they hide next to a house? No, if they wanted to be alone they would avoid any chance of someone hearing them outside. An alleyway? You’ve triple checked all of them… The nearby woods? Where would you even begin to search? But, it is the only place you haven’t searched yet. And Sif should know how dangerous it is. But it's the only place left. You slap your cheeks. This is no time to doubt yourself! You’re Isabeau! If there’s a change Sif is there, you are going to take it! No more hesitation! Sif wouldn’t ever give up, so you can’t either! You won’t leave him behind again!
You're not the biggest fan of forests. Well, the favor trees are neat and all, but you were never the type to go running into the woods when you were a kid. The ground is so uneven. You end up tripping on a branch, and slam your head into a stump. It hurts, but you can't give up. Blood runs down your forehead, not important, gotta find Sif. Thoughts are starting to tell you that it's hopeless, that you should regroup to the others. The back of your mind only has so much space. Do you even know the way back home? You feel all turned around now. It's hard to make out your foot prints. Wait… footprints! They're way too small to be yours. The canopy was doing its best to slow the descending blanket of snow. With that, you see the footprints leading further in… He's there.
You wouldn't have recognized him without the shaking. From your distance and light, he would have looked like a lump of snow and some moss. But they were shivering. No? Getting closer, you see he's, hyperventilating.
Before you can get closer, he snaps his attention towards you and jumps back. they're getting ready to run. Your mind is, confused. Trying to process so many things at once. Thoughts are fighting each other to swim to the surface, and, the one that comes to mind first is… that you're tired. Your body gives out on its own and you sit down on the snowy floor. Things are a lot clearer now that you're not running everywhere. Sif’s eye is so wide. He looks like a scared prey animal ready to dart away or attack.
“Oh I get it. You were scared when M'dame Odile was checking up on you. Jeez Sif, way to scare everyone like that.”
Sif looked confused. Poor thing. This is just like those times you've needed to coax a cat out of a tree or ditch.
“Oh! How about we try doing a breathing exercise! That usually helps right? Here follow my lead. Breath in…”
Sif seems to relax a bit as they follow your lead. How long were you supposed to hold your breath again? Now is a good a time as any.
“And out!”
They've calmed down a bit, you think. They're looking at you with caution but curiosity as well.
Be reeeal nice if you had some of Bonbon's snacks right now.
“...Sif, we're all worried about you right now. I mean what you did tonight, and how you've been acting the past month. It's clear there's something you're hiding from us.”
Sif raises their guard again. Moonlight bounces off their dagger.
“But, we won't force you to tell us.”
That eases their stance, and also seems to confuse them. You're starting to get a bit uncomfortable by how one sided this has been.
“I mean, unless it starts ending the world again and then you'll have to talk, but like, take your time bud!”
….
“...”
What would Sif do?
“Ok, let's try easing the tension. Tell me if you've heard this one before. What's the best pace to carve something?”
“..?”
“Whittle by whittle!”
“...pfft”
You can't help but smile as Sif tries to stifle his laughter. Yes! Yes!
you're not sure how long you spend, telling puns out in the freezing cold. The others are probably worrying about you by now, and you should definitely get this head injury checked. But… It's nice. With enough patience, Siffrin begins to creep closer before collapsing near you. Finally feeling safe again.
You let out the sigh of tension you've been holding all night. It's nearly daybreak. It won't be hard to find your way back. You look down at your sleeping companion and get ready to carry them back. You have to accept it now.
This isn't Sif.