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The first time Gary had asked him for his phone number, minutes after they had first met, Goh had awkwardly laughed it off, figuring it was a joke.
The second time Gary had asked him for his phone number, when they had well established their rivalry, Goh had more than bluntly told him to fuck off and shove it up his ass.
The third time Gary had asked him for his phone number - he had made sure to reiterate that he wasn't teasing him this time, and that he genuinely wanted to stay in contact since they had both been accepted as Chasers for Project Mew - Goh gave Gary his number, strangely not even feeling any begrudgement about it.
The two of them exchanged only a couple of quick texts, before going on the Project Mew Expedition, then once again going off in their own separate ways.
And Goh had assumed that that was that, the two of them had managed to find common ground, the reason they had met was done, and Goh wasn't even hanging out around Ash anymore, he was on his own solo journey.
There was no real reason for them to have much to do with each other anymore, at least not until Professor Amaranth contacted them again. Garys number would just be another contact in his list that he never made use of but kept around anyways, along with a few people he had to work together with on school projects years ago.
He wasn't sure why that thought made him so sad.
When exactly had he stopped thinking of Gary as an annoyance and started considering him a close friend?
The first time Gary called him, it took Goh off guard. He stared at the pop up in confusion long enough that it disappeared again, at which point Goh was too embarrassed to try and call back.
The second time Gary called him, Goh didn't hesitate even a second before picking up, glad to get another chance. He made up a bad excuse for why he hadn't answered Garys call last time, about being in the middle of helping out some wild Pokemon, because that was something Goh would actually have done in any situation, before they started to switch over to somehow having a normal and nice conversation.
From then on, Garys calls became a surprisingly regular thing. And eventually, Goh started initiating calls as well.
It was weird. So so weird to have casual conversations with the guy he had antagonized for so long, but it turned out Gary was genuinely nice to talk to.
They talked about anything, really. Pokemon, obviously. Whatever was going on currently in their lives. Stories of their pasts.
It was weird, but it was nice. Because Goh realized more and more how much he liked Gary, how fun he was to be around, how much Goh admired him.
Sometimes, Gary reminded him of…
Goh shook his head at the thought.
No, no, of course not. It wasn't like that. Maybe they were similar, but it wasn't the same in the slightest. There was a huge difference in how he felt about Gary and how he felt about…
"I saw Ash today.", Gary mentioned out of nowhere during one of their now regular calls. "Apparently he's staying in Pallet for a while right now."
Hearing Ashs name took Goh off guard.
Of course, Ash had always been a link between them. In a way, they most likely wouldn't even be talking with each other right now if it wasn't for Ash.
But even with the lingering presence Ash had in their lives, they didn't talk about him during any of their conversations these days, not once.
And Goh knew why he didn't want to bring him up to Gary, but he was scared as to what Garys reason for always avoiding talking about him to Goh was.
Or maybe, Goh was projecting. Maybe there never was a reason as to why they didn't talk about Ash, maybe Gary had never avoided it at all, and he simply wasn't someone that had come up in their conversations.
"Yeah? How… um, how's he doing?", Goh asked carefully
"Well… I asked him if he was a Pokemon Master yet, yknow, since he's World Champion and all?"
Goh hummed. "What did he say?"
Gary awkwardly chuckled. "I dunno."
"You… don't know?", Goh repeated slowly with a frown.
"He just stared at me and didn't say a word, I think I may have blue screened him with that. I ended up just sorta… awkwardly walking away?"
Goh snorted at that, his frown giving in to amusement. "You gave him an existential crisis and then you just left him like that? Gary, oh my god."
"Eh, he'll be fine.", Gary assured him. "He's Ash."
And with that, Gohs smile vanished again.
Gary spoke their mutual friends name with oh so much fondness, that it made Gohs stomach churn.
This, this was exactly why they never talked about Ash.
Because Goh knew exactly what that tone of voice meant, because Goh was terrified out of his mind what that tone of voice could mean.
He had really grown to enjoy talking to Gary, he didn't want anything stupid like this to come between them, even if it probably was inevitable.
"Say, Goh, I've been meaning to ask you…", Gary said, when Goh had been quiet for what was likely a bit too long.
"Meaning to ask me what?", Goh asked, when Gary drifted off, even though he knew what the question was, even though he knew he didn't want to talk about this.
"You have a crush on Ash."
Despite what Gary had just said prior, it wasn't phrased like a question, it was a clear and point blank statement.
Goh took a moment to consider his answer, to really think about it.
He could just brush it off.
He could laugh and say he didn't, and even if Gary knew fully well it wasn't the truth, there was a chance they wouldn't talk about the Donphan in the room for another while, that Gary would just let it be.
But it didn't feel right.
Goh didn't want to lie to Gary, especially not about this.
"Yeah, I do.", Goh finally admitted. It was quiet, more hesitant than he would have hoped it would sound, even to his own ears, but it was the truth. "Is it… that obvious?"
Gary hummed. "I wouldn't say it's necessarily obvious, but… I… noticed it."
So did I, Goh thought but didn't say.
"I think you should tell him.", Gary continued. "He deserves to know before… before you lose your chance."
"I… I know. I was going to, before we left. I tried to, it was just…"
"Difficult?", Gary guessed, his tone of voice surprisingly soft, surprisingly empathetic.
"Yeah.", Goh breathed. And he could not believe he was telling Gary of all people about this, but now that he had started, it was like he couldn't bring himself to stop.
"I had this whole speech planned, about how much I liked him, but how I felt I had to travel on my own for a while to find myself, but I chickened out. Then I tried starting it more subtle, so I told him the stars were pretty, but, well, he didn't get what I meant and then he changed the topic to how he wanted to leave as well, and I got kinda upset and-"
Goh cut himself off. He was rambling. Gary did not need to know that detail. He took a deep breath to compose himself, tried to think of a way to change the topic. But before he could, Gary, the absolute asshole that he was, started laughing.
Goh felt himself blush, and was grateful this was only a voice call and Gary couldn't see his face right now. Of course. Goh had thought they were bonding and sharing emotions, while to Gary it was all just some joke. "It's not funny", Goh protested weakly.
"Sorry, sorry", Gary apologized, sounding genuinely sorry. "I promise I'm not making fun of you, it's just…" Goh could hear him take a breath, and from one moment to the next, Garys tone turned from laughter to sounding vulnerable. "I tried doing the same thing before."
Gohs eyes widened. "Oh.", he breathed out.
He stared at his phone screen, and suddenly he wished he could see Garys expression right now. Instead, he was only met with his contact picture, which Goh had set to a Blastoise he got off the internet, because he didn't even have any actual photos of Gary.
"It was… quite a few years ago by now. When we were twelve, right before we battled in the Johto league. Ash and I were alone outside at night, and I told him the moon was beautiful." Gary chuckled at the memory. "I knew he wouldn't get how I meant it. Ash isn't an idiot by any means, he has his surprisingly wise moments, but he's not… booksmart, I guess? He doesn't understand metaphors all that well. If you want to tell him something, you need to say exactly what you're thinking. He's always been like that, it's… kinda cute if you ask me…" Gary sighed wistfully. "The reason I told him was more for myself, so I could try and move on."
"But you… never did, did you?"
"No. I didn't."
Garys voice was barely above a whisper, and it was a miracle it even got picked up by the call.
Goh opened and closed his mouth a few times, unsure of what to say. Here they were. Those feelings that Goh knew Gary harbored, that he had been so terrified of hearing from the man himself, out in the open.
And suddenly, they didn't scare him at all anymore.
Because really, he'd known this already, hadn't he? Not this specific story, but the fact that Gary was just as much in love with Ash as Goh himself was. Because why wouldn't he be? Ash was amazing, and Gary had known him all his life, him having feelings for him made sense. It would be more surprising to him if Gary didn't feel that way about Ash.
Without that fear, all Goh could really focus on was how sad and defeated Gary sounded about this whole situation. It was awful hearing him like that, hearing confident and snarky and cocky Gary Oak give up on his crush without ever genuinely telling him how he felt.
Gohs next words were out of his mouth before he could really think about them, and they surprised even himself. "Why does that sound like you already gave up on him?"
He should be celebrating. He should be happy that Gary wasn't going to do anything about his feelings for Ash, because it gave Goh a better chance to tell Ash how he felt, possibly start a relationship with him and snatch away Ash right from under Garys nose.
But no, Goh wasn't like that.
Gary was his friend. And right now it didn't matter to him that they were in love with the same person, because Goh wanted his friend to be happy more than anything else, and he didn't want the person that connected them to be what makes them drift apart.
Gary seemed surprised by Gohs response as well, but answered the question nonetheless. "I did.", he admitted. "Back then? It was my own issues that stopped me from telling him. Now? Now it's because… I don't want this to get between you and me. Because I like this, I like being friends with you. And I know Ash is in love with you, Goh, not me." Garys voice cracked, it was clear how much it hurt him to say this.
Goh wanted to laugh at him, at his ridiculous statement, but the laughter got caught in his throat. And as Garys words fully set in, he suddenly felt like throwing up. "What?", he wheezed instead. Just… what??
"That one is obvious. Well, to everyone except to you." Gary sounded almost amused as he said this, as Goh felt like the world was spinning. "Ash acts… differently around you, but I can see why you wouldn't notice that yours-"
"But Ash loves you!", Goh interrupted incredulously. He shook his head a few times, not thinking of the fact Gary wouldn't know. "He acts differently around you, Gary. When you and I met he completely ditched me to talk to you for hours instead. He talks about you constantly and…", Goh drifted off, forgetting what else he was going to add. "Well, everything you'd do around someone you have a crush on."
Goh could hear Gary take in a sharp breath, but otherwise he didn't say a word. The silence between them was deafening and stretched on for a moment too long. Goh almost wanted to awkwardly laugh about the fact they had both been thinking the same thing, but he was way too nervous to.
"You really should tell Ash how you feel.", Gary said eventually. "I mean, genuinely tell him." Goh opened his mouth to reply, but Gary already continued with a chuckle, and a forced smile that Goh could very clearly hear. "Well, I should get going. I wanted to be in Viridian before it gets dark. Smell ya later, Goh."
"Gary, wait!", Goh interrupted before he could hang up, and Gary did wait. "Everything you said? The same goes for you. You're right that he should know, but Ash deserves to know your feelings just as much as he does mine, you know. And… whatever comes after that?" Goh smiled, "You'll always be my friend. You and Ash both, this won't come between us."
There's a few more beats of silence, before Goh gets an answer in the form of beeping sounds. Gary had hung up on him.
Goh stared at the Blastoise on his screen and listened to the beeping for a couple of seconds, before turning off his phone and putting it away.
He very much hoped Gary would consider his words, and just didn't want to outright admit it to Goh.
But even if he never got a straight answer out of him and the call had ended the way it did, he felt strangely light and at peace.
He had always been so terrified of hearing about Garys feelings for Ash, and now Goh knows that he had been terrified of nothing.
If anything, he only felt like a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders, like him and Gary could grow even closer now that this was out in the open.
He really had no clue why the thought of Ash and Gary being together suddenly didn't bother him anymore.
Goh didn't think about this conversation anymore for a long while. He didn't forget about it, he probably never even could, but it wasn't at the forefront of his mind.
The next time Gary called him, neither of them brought up the conversation at all, although it didn't feel like it had never happened either.
There was no lingering awkwardness between them, and Goh had thought that there hadn't been before, but with their feelings out in the open, no unresolved conversations… it was nice. He felt comfortable with Gary, possibly more comfortable than he did with Ash, if only because there were still feelings they hadn't talked about between them.
They did talk about it, eventually. Goh finally managed to tell Ash how he felt, the next time he saw him. He knew that Gary had already done the same a while ago, and the answer he had gotten was that Ash needed time to think about it.
And Goh was expecting a similar answer along those lines, maybe an outright rejection if Ash had thought over his feelings for Gary long enough, but he had to tell him how he felt about him. If he didn't, he would never be able to move on from him, and neither of them deserved that.
It didn't seem all that scary anymore, anyway. The conversation had gone fine enough for Gary, and Ash wouldn't break Gohs heart any more than that.
He was prepared for a kind rejection. Or Ash telling him that he still needs more time to choose between him and Gary. Or, what a part of him was still hoping for, Ash reciprocating is feelings.
He was not prepared for what answer Ash would actually give him.
"... Hey, um, would you be fine with it, if I… date both you and Gary?"
... Huh.
Ash chuckled nervously, aggressively avoided looking Goh into his eyes, fidgeted with the hem of his shirt.
"I just… um. Gary told me he liked me too, recently. And I didn't give him a straight answer then."
Goh nodded dumbfoundedly. This wasn't new information to him. Gary had told him in great detail. He already knew this. But his brain was slow on catching onto why Ash was bringing this up right now.
"I didn't, not because I'm not interested in him, but because I'm also interested in you, yknow? I like both of you so much. I don't want to have to choose one of you and watch the other being sad about it. So if I… date both of you… that works, right? That would make all three of us happy?"
Ash looked right at Goh then, his beautiful brown eyes filled with nervousness and a glimmer of hope in them.
Goh racked his brain for any reason to say no to this, but he couldn't find any.
He had never thought they could just… both be with Ash. It couldn't be that easy. But… why couldn't it?
Goh wanted to call Ash his, but weirdly enough, he didn't mind if he was Garys, too.
Ash was right, they could just all be happy that way, what was saying they couldn't do this? Societal norms? None of them were straight, anyway.
If it had been anyone else, Goh would absolutely have said no. But he didn't mind, if it was Gary specifically.
Somehow, everything in his life always came back to Gary, just as much as his life evolved around Ash.
Speaking of Ash…
He looked a lot more worried than he had before Goh got lost in his thoughts. Maybe he thought his silence was a no.
But Goh smiled softly at him.
"We're gonna have to talk to Gary about that first."
Ashs worried face dissolved into a wide smile, before he jumped at Goh and hugged him tightly.
Goh and Gary had both been dating Ash for quite a few months now, and at least as far as Goh was concerned, they have been the best few months of his lifes, and the other two seemed a lot happier now as well.
They had started traveling together, all three of them, on Ashs request to spend more time with his two boyfriends. And, well, Goh wasn't good at saying no to Ash. He wanted to be around him as well, and he'd be lying if he acted like Gary being there wasn't nice as well. He'd had his fill on traveling alone, it wasn't as fun as being with his best friends.
Currently, it was getting fairly late into the night. Ash had dozed off in the tent a while ago. Goh found himself unable to fall asleep for no real reason in particular, he supposed he was simply more of a night Noctowl than Ash is. The same went for Gary, who was still awake as well.
It was just the two of them, sitting close together by the continuously dimming fire, neither of them saying a word.
It was a comfortable silence. The night was nice, the sky was clear, it was still fairly warm. Goh was perfectly content with not saying a word and simply enjoying the atmosphere and Garys company.
But then Gary spoke.
"The stars are beautiful tonight, aren't they?"
Goh whirled around his head so fast that it made him dizzy.
His mouth agape, he stared at Gary.
Gary wasn't looking in Gohs direction at all, he was still looking up at the sky, as though he really was just casually mentioning the stars being beautiful.
As though Goh didn't know the exact implications of the words that Gary had just whispered into the night sky.
The implications of Gary saying those words, to Goh specifically.
But what-
That didn't-
Since when did Gary-
Goh sucked in a sharp breath.
No, no, this made perfect sense, actually.
Of course Gary liked him.
The only person Goh had ever seen Gary act around in any way similar to the way he acts around him was Ash, and Ash is his literal boyfriend.
And it had been the same with Goh, wasn't it?
Goh told Gary things he didn't tell anyone else, besides maybe Ash.
Goh felt more comfortable around Gary than he did anyone else… besides definitely Ash.
He very vividly remembered thinking about the only reason Ash dating someone besides him didn't bother him nearly as much as it should was because it was Gary, specifically.
Gary was practically Gohs best friend now, but not in the way Chloe was his best friend, but in the same way Ash had been his best friend before he realized his feelings were deeper than that.
They were kind of technically in the same relationship already, there wasn't anything to freak out about here.
If Goh and Gary started dating each other as well, what would change, really?
Goh actually allowing himself to admit that when he had watched Gary kiss Ash, and Ash had leaned in right after to kiss Goh as well, with Garys taste still lingering on his lips, a not so insignificant part of Gohs brain had wondered what it would be like if he just leaned in to kiss Gary too?
He took another good look at the man sitting beside him.
He was still looking up at the sky, the moonlight shining down on him and making him look absolutely gorgeous and fuck it Goh clearly wanted this, he had no reason to hesitate that much about this confession.
He scooted closer to Gary, closing the already small distance that had been between them, and leaned his head on his shoulder.
He could feel Gary tense up a little, he absolutely was not as composed about this as he had made himself look like. But he immediately relaxed at Gohs words.
"The moon is pretty as well."
"Oh my god.", a quiet voice replied to that.
A voice that very much was not Garys.
Both Goh and Gary turned around to look at Ash, sitting cross legged in front of the tent Goh was so sure he had been asleep in, his head buried in his hands.
"Sorry, sorry. I know I just ruined a totally adorable and sweet moment between you guys and I'm very happy for you and all and it's honestly so nice that you're comfortable enough with each other and in this relationship to say these things but just…" he looked up and waved his arms in their directions "they were love confessions.", Ash finished his interruption with so much genuine anguish in his tone that made Gohs lips twitch upwards in amusement.
Gary was very badly concealing his own laugh. "You only just got that?"
"Yes, I only just got that!" Ash groaned as he stood up. "Why would I know that? Why can't either of you just say what you- Oh my god, what the hell Gary, we were twelve. I know you said you've liked me for a while, but that long? Why didn't you just say something? I'm in love with the two most infuriating people on the planet."
"You call me emotionally constipated now, you don't remember how much worse I was when we were teenagers?" Gary shrugged. "Besides, I'm glad things went the way they did. Do you think if we had started dating back then…" Gary didn't look away from Ash, but he moved his hand on top of Gohs, to which Goh turned around his own hand to be able to hold Garys "... do you think either of us would've let himself have feelings for Goh?"
Gohs heart skipped a beat at Garys wording.
Either of us.
Gary had just clearly confessed his love to Goh in a way that couldn't have been more clear to the both of them specifically, but actually hearing him say it directly like this and include both himself and Ash in that statement still made it feel different.
Ashs gaze shifted from Gary over to Goh, and he relaxed as his annoyance at their incapability of clearly voicing their feelings to him turned into a soft smile instead.
"Yeah, okay, you're right with that actually."
Ash walked up to both of his boyfriends and sat down in front of them. He grabbed Gohs free hand with one of his and took a hold of Garys with the other.
"I'm glad it turned out the way it did, it wouldn't be the same without him.", Ash said, looking at Goh with so much love written all over his face.
Goh glanced at Gary, who was now looking at him with a similar expression.
He felt like he could cry.
"I love you both so much.", Goh managed to choke out, squeezing both of their hands.
"We love you, too.", Ash said softly.
"Yeah. We really do.", Gary agreed.
When Goh woke up, he was lying in between Ash and Gary, their limbs tangled up with each other all over the place, the sleeping bags barely making the forest ground more comfortable to be on, unable to remember when they had finally brought themselves to actually get back in the tent let alone when he fell asleep.
It really was a very uncomfortable position to be in.
There was nowhere else Goh would rather be right now.