Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Scenario 1: The Beginning

As a vocal online fan of Hamefura, Keith knows this face well. Extremely well, in fact. Perhaps too well. But why is this face his? What is he doing in the apparent body of Keith Claes! It just had to be the weird pseudo-incest guy? Really?

No mistake, he liked Keith in some ways…but you can’t just get over such a vast hurdle as siblings. If the isekai gods had to smite him, it should have been as Alan. But all this is secondary to the fact that now he’s Keith goddamn Claes. And by the looks of it, he’s not nearly young enough to escape the plot by running away before the Claes family finds him, because the nice quality of the carpet and the very ostentatious room are not a good sign. The casual display of fabulous wealth is starting to make him a little baffled. Like, this is way too much, right?

Keith (because that is his name now, like it or not), sighs. There’s no point in avoiding the main plot. Katarina herself proved that in the og Hamefura! Maybe instead, he can just make sure that Katarina ends up with Maria. Then hopefully the rest of her harem will give up in the face of how shining and amazing Maria is. You can’t go wrong with a lesbian happy ending! Hopefully…

In the meantime, he can enjoy having Katarina as a silly, loving older sister. He’s never had siblings before, so it would be nice to be doted on like a little brother. A plus side in the face of a life that may turn out insane.

At that exact moment, his maid (?) enters the room.

“Lord Keith, you’re awake? It’s nearly time for breakfast. Let me assist you in getting dressed.”

“Uhm. Thank you.” Smooth. Very smooth.

She helps him button up his vest before remarking, “Also, the new magic tutor the lord and lady hired for you arrived late last night. Lady Millidiana requested I inform you that your lessons will begin an hour after breakfast today.”

Alright, that places the timeline either directly after the Katarina axe incident, or maybe a little later if the original tutor somehow got fired for incompetence. Not bad; it would be way harder to live a normal life if Keith had already gotten up to rival shenanigans with the rest of the reverse harem. He can't imagine trying to somehow salvage those relationships. Ah yes, it's me! Normal Keith, except I now don't hate you for some reason. They would almost definitely send him to the infirmary. Except, Keith feels like he’s forgetting something important. He can't for the life of him put a finger on exactly what it is. Oh well. It happens.

In the study room, three hours later and facing the expectant face of his new magic tutor, he remembers. Oh my fucking god, wait. Keith thinks. I’m supposed to have magic now. I do not know how to do magic. There had better be an isekai solution to this, or he's leveling the wall and burying himself 20 feet below ground.

Scenario 2: Characters? Plot? In This Economy?

He exits the lesson feeling like his brain just got chewed up by a very naughty dog and spat out. Oof. The author never said that magic study felt similar to getting put in advanced calculus class, but then again the author wrote the character of Keith to be hypercompetent in magic. He squeaked by through muscle memory and a weird sixth sense, which he just interprets as something programmed into his transmigration brain. Keith is not looking forward to years more of this. He already did his time in college.

He’s so focused on his inner thoughts that he doesn’t notice when he walks smack into Katarina and Geordo. Katarina just dropped? Threw? what looks to be a toy snake, which is what jolts him out of his stupor. It’s a plot point. In real life! Keith would be freaking out way more if he wasn’t also suddenly focused on how absolutely sad and pathetic Geordo looks while terrified of the snake.

Keith feels a bit bad. Geordo is black-hearted, but right now he’s also like, a kid. He hasn’t had a chance to grow into his dastardly ways. Also, phobias are no joke. Keith remembers being violently ill once over a tomato when he was a kid (Well he is a kid now. But that’s not the point.) and never eating one ever again.

Okay, it’s not the same thing. But hasn’t Geordo been punished enough? Keith decides that, fuck it, he might as well intervene. Maybe he can also steer Geordo away from Katarina somehow if the stars align. He makes up his mind and marches forward.

“Sister? What are you doing?” He calls out.

Katarina yelps. “What, Keith? What are you doing here?!!”

Keith tsks. He sweeps forward and closes his hand around the snake, pulling it away from Geordo. He then turns around to face Katarina and pockets the toy. Great. Now time to pull the patent-pending Keith is a cutie-pie move. Keith scrunches up his face a little and pouts.

“Sister…what were you doing with this toy?”

Katarina panics, naturally. “Nothing much! Of course! We were simply. Um. Studying it! Looking at nature, it’s important to know what snakes look like!”

Keith narrows his eyes a little. “You weren’t…being mean to this pretty guy over here?”

(The author would like to note that while Keith may be aware of the canon, he is still a little stupid. It’s the Claes in him. He is Not thinking about how strange it is for baby Keith, who has never met Geordo at this point, to call him pretty. Geordo and Katarina, on the other hand, are very aware.)

Katarina vigorously shakes her head, before pausing. She takes ten full seconds to process Keith’s statement and latches onto the last bit.

“No, of course not – pretty? Wait, Keith, what did you just say?”

In the background, Geordo, who is trying to regain his composure after an undignified fall, chokes.

Keith does not recognize his faux pas, so he just repeats, “You weren’t being mean, right?” He unconsciously pouts more at the two of them. Now you see, Keith is operating under the idea that he is still in a relatively normal body. He knows his face is sweet and cute, but he doesn’t know the extent.

Keith is under the impression that this is happening:

Katarina: Oh my goodness, I can’t get mad at him for interrupting as he’s my adorable brother.
Geordo: Wow, I avoided a terrible fate. This guy is awesome for helping me, even if it is embarrassing.

In actuality, it's more like this.

Katarina: Unexpectedly Keith enters the arena? OMG! Don’t tell me Keith’s heart is being stolen by the black-hearted prince! No, nooo! My sweet little brother! You can’t be taken in by Geordo’s charms!
Geordo: An unexpectedly fluffy puppy-like boy called me pretty? And is defending me? What is going on?!

“Not all! No being mean here!” Katarina opts to violently hug Keith out of confusion. Keith just goes with it. He knows she’s not actually bullying Geordo. And he does love a good semi-strangling hug.

Geordo dusts himself off and coughs conspicuously into his hand. “Why, Katarina, I don’t believe I’ve been introduced to your…friend here.”

Katarina pauses once more. “Oh, right! This is my new little brother, Keith. Isn’t he so cute?” She pinches Keith’s cheeks. “Keith, this is Prince Geordo. Now you guys have met!”

Geordo privately looks a little bummed that Katarina is not introducing him as her fiance, Keith thinks. But that isn’t really his business. Now, he needs to make a good impression on the prince so they don’t somehow end up as bitter rivals fighting over his sister’s love. Also, he just realized he’s not supposed to know who Geordo is until this exact moment. Close call.

He finagles his way out of Katarina’s grip and bows 90 degrees. That’s how it works, right?

“Hello, Prince Geordo? It’s a pleasure to meet you. Uhm. Why are you visiting my sister?”

Geordo looks a little pleased. “Well, you see, Katarina is my fiance. So of course, I am paying her a visit. As fiances do. I suppose that would make you my future brother-in law.” He does a weird little smirk thing.

Jesus Christ. No wonder Katarina thinks this guy is out to get her. If Keith didn’t actually know a little better, he would think Geordo is talking down to him. Which, well. He is. However, there is a distinct feeling that Geordo also has no fucking clue how to talk to people in a friendly and non-hostile manner. So Keith sighs again, internally. Alright, let's salvage this.

“Wow…really? Hm, I think I understand.”

“That’s wonderful, Lord Keith.”

“So we can be friends forever then! I’ll protect you from snakes, and you can give me nice hugs. I’m sure as my sister’s fiance you must be great at hugs! And you have really pretty hair, too. I’ve never seen such a shade of gold before.”

Geordo: !!!!

“Ah… lord Keith, that’s not what I meant…”

“No?” Keith looks up at Geordo with slightly teary eyes. “You don’t want to be friends?”

“It’s not that! I–”

“I only have my sister as a friend, I can’t have another?”

Katarina glares at Geordo as she hugs Keith again.

Geordo: Panicked!!!!

“No, no! Lord Keith! We can absolutely be. Friends. Yes.”

“Really?!” Keith smiles like the sun. Katarina and Geordo are immediately blinded by its brilliance and left disoriented.

“Yes…woah…”

“So you should call me Keith then. If we’re friends. Right, sister?”

“Yes, of course! Friends should call each other by their name! No need for titles!”

Currently, Geordo is possibly disintegrating under the energy of two Claes kids. As the possible crown prince-to-be, he likes to think of himself as stoic and able to handle any scenario. It turns out that when faced with the very, very cute faces of Katarina and Keith, he in fact loses the ability to function. I get it, man. It’s like, the Claes thing or something.

Keith, meanwhile, is overcome by the joy of actually getting Geordo (Geordo! Of all people) to declare they are friends, even if he had to do some manipulation to get there. He would celebrate way more, but he suddenly hears the voice of doom.

It’s his tutor. He forgot he was only on break. He has to go back to that hell of a study.

“Lord Keith! Lord Keith! It is high time for you to return to our lesson!”

“Oughf.” Keith visibly sags. Katarina obviously notices, and bless her heart, tries to help. “Do you need me to smuggle you out of here?” She whispers, sympathetically. He absolutely wants to take her up on the offer. But Keith knows he has to figure out this magic stuff somehow, even if it takes the worst lessons imaginable. He can’t end up hurting the people he loves on accident because he slacked off in controlling his magic. As weird as his new family is, he does like them. And he has to have something going for him in this world! He slowly shakes his head.

“No. But thank you for that, sister. I do have go back.”

“Alright, my studious little bro,” Katarina says. “So hard-working and smart!”

Keith walks back inside, slightly dejected. On the bright side, once he finally gets older and gets to go to school he can just sleep in class. Probably.

Omake: You Can Have an Early Sexuality Crisis, As a Treat

Geordo stares after Keith’s retreating form. He turns to Katarina. “Is he normally like all that?”

“Like what?” Katarina tilts her head curiously.

“Like…that.” He pantomimes sparkles exploding around his face.

“Oh, that. Yeah, isn’t he such a sweetie ? He’s always trailing after me and asking such cute questions, Keith’s so bright and innocent!”

Bright and innocent, huh. And he called Geordo pretty. Twice. Geordo’s not sure why his face starts to heat up a little at that thought. Keith’s smile lingers in his mind a little. He touches a hand to his hair unconsciously. Gold, unlike Keith’s fetching ash brown. Maybe he and Keith can be friends? It wouldn’t hurt, especially if he marries Katarina, to be on good terms with her family. That’s clearly the smartest course of action.

He pats himself on the back internally. Yeah, that’s right. It’ll make his life easier if he’s friends with Keith.

(Keep telling yourself that, buddy. The author would, however, like to point out how horribly bisexual this kid is going to realize he is in a couple years. Oof. Good luck.)

Omake 2: Electric Boogaloo

Katarina: Is this a future BL? Why are Keith and Geordo suddenly staring at each other?
Is this the solution? To let the capture targets capture each other? We’ve never considered such a thing before! It could work!

Katarina, two seconds later: No! I refuse to let my little brother Keith be influenced by black-hearted Geordo! I can’t let such a thing happen! Anyone but Geordo! Even Nicol Ascart would be better, why, at least he’s a good older brother so he’d take care of Keith. Are we actually considering this?!

Katarina’s conclusion: I have to work hard to protect Keith’s innocence. We’ll avoid the death flags and get Keith a happy ending at the same time!

Chapter Text

Scenario 3: chat are we winning this? Chat?

Keith stares at the book in front of him. The book stares back remorselessly at Keith.

He doesn’t want to read this! He really doesn’t. He’s a kid, he should be outside. Or at least not reading textbooks in his spare time. Nobody ever mentions textbooks when they talk about isekai. He doesn’t recall any of the reincarnated villainesses having to read boring stuff on screen; although, he guesses that doesn’t count when you’re in offscreen time. Which he is most definitely in.

After about a minute of staring listlessly at the pages, he makes up his mind. No more studying. Instead, he should come up with a concrete plan for how to get Katarina and Maria together as fast as possible. Also maybe a plan for how he can coast by on the sidelines without getting involved in harem shenanigans to a crazy degree.

There’s a blank notebook somewhere in this room. Keith spends about five minutes looking for it before he discovers it wedged underneath a chair in the corner. When he removes the book, the chair ominously creaks. He wisely decides to avoid sitting in it if he can.

Back at his desk, he opens the notebook. Alright, where to begin? Hm. Well, he has met Geordo already, so why not start with him.

On the scale that he’s just made up in his head at this exact moment, Geordo is a high priority worry. That’s for several reasons. First, he’s liable to be crown prince and is in line for the throne. That’s way too much power! Second, he’s the most scheming out of everyone except for perhaps, Mary Hunt? If he doesn’t work hard on getting Geordo to stop falling in love with Katarina, then Geordo could be a big obstacle in his mission.
But at the same time, he can’t ostracize the poor guy because Geordo’s approval is important in letting Maria and Katarina fall in love safely!

Keith is getting stressed just thinking about it. Still, he manages to list several possible routes he can take while dealing with Geordo. Maybe he can act as a distraction and be annoying enough that Geordo associates Katarina with Keith being annoying. Or he could try actively monopolizing so much of Geordo’s attention that he doesn’t have time to fall in love with Katarina. Both options sound a bit scary, but Keith thinks he’s up to the challenge if it works out.

Who’s next on the list for Katarina to meet? Keith thinks it’s Mary, because Alan and Mary kind of come as a weird duo; but Mary is for sure the first one, because she bonds with Katarina over gardening.

Mary Hunt is a weird case of a character for Keith. She’s a lot of people’s best girl for a reason, and she’s smart and cool. But she’s also not the one he’s rooting for in the romance game. However, he has to stay on her good side. You do not want Mary as your enemy under any circumstances! As it is, maybe Mary can serve as a deterrent for the men around Katarina especially when they start at the academy.

Also, if Katarina decides she wants to be polyamorous with both Maria and Mary, well. Keith will support her. Why the hell not. But he’s not doing the work for free! Mary can figure that out herself.

He labels Mary as medium on the I-need-to-actively-keep-an-eye-on-them scale. He also writes down several ideas on how he can possibly stay in her good graces. His magic isn’t terrible so...helping her move ground for flowers? It’s worth a shot.

Next is Alan. Keith really really likes Alan out of all the Hamefura boys. Alan is cute and a little silly, but he’s also artistic and super protective of what he loves. How can you not like him instantly?

Keith doesn’t think he’ll have to worry about Alan at all. Alan doesn’t truly figure out his feelings for so long that he’s not really a threat to Maria x Katarina, so Keith has plenty of time to run interference or somehow redirect those feelings to someone else later. Plus, maybe they can be friends. Alan seems like he could use a Keith-shaped friend. He labels Alan as a low priority on the scale.

The last possible obstacles are the Ascart siblings, Sophia and Nicol. Keith is pretty sure that Sophia isn’t too much of a threat, considering her weird status as Katarina’s friend in two worlds? She’s kind of precious. He would feel bad trying to sabotage her in anything. Sophia is a fellow lover of romance novels, so Keith could try and connect with her that way? Hamefura Keith did his absolute best to try and understand the novels that Katarina and Sophia fangirled over but failed. As a new, more improved Keith, he can use this power to get Sophia to like him enough that he won’t be viewed as a weird rival! And by being on good terms with Sophia, he won’t be in trouble with Nicol.

Speaking of Nicol. Nicol is the most mysterious of all the characters, so Keith has got to be a little bit careful around him. Thankfully, Katarina is mostly immune to Nicol’s handsomeness, so he doesn’t have to worry about any sudden weird infatuations. But, Keith muses, he’s not sure how exactly to deal with Nicol at all. He could try a similar tactic to Geordo and stick by Nicol 24/7, but that’s physically impossible to do such a thing with both boys. And he’s definitely not trying to annoy the poor guy out of existence.

Ugh. Keith’s head hurts. He labels Sophia as low and Nicol as confusing just for how much he’s going to have to scheme when it comes to the latter. Keith throws the notebook across the desk and walks across the room to faceplant into one of the couch cushions.

Katarina was actually correct all along, Keith thinks. Digging in the dirt is therapeutic. He should go dig some dirt up. Just dig a big hole and then fill it with more dirt.

He spends five whole minutes digging a big hole in his head like it’s a mindfulness exercise. It’s a compromise, because Keith cannot actually go and dig a big hole. His parents already have Katarina, he can’t let them go off the deep end because the boy they recently adopted decides to join their daughter in distinctly commoner activities. Keith starts mentally filling the hole with the dirt that he just dug out of it. This is normal behavior for a kid, probably?

He’s halfway through the weird mind exercise when he remembers that after Maria, there’s at least one more admirer that gets added to Katarina’s harem. Raphael.

“Guh,” Keith says out loud. “I don’t want to think about this again.”

“Again?” Katarina asks in a curious voice.

Keith slides right off the couch onto the floor in a panic. “Sister! Were you there this whole time?!!”

“Nah, I just heard you say some weird stuff just now,” she says. “Is studying really getting to you that bad?

Under her breath Katarina mutters, “Was Keith always the type that enjoyed studying? I can’t remember?”

Keith panics a little bit. He is not going to reveal himself to Katarina, that would be a terrible idea. He’s gotta be better at managing his image!

“Onee-san…it’s not that I’m sick of studying but rather that my head hurts a little. My eyes too….” Keith pouts and scrunches his nose.

Katarina is overcome with cuteness aggression. She grapples him into another hug. “Aw, Keith! You’ve gotta take better care of yourself, silly. Why don’t you come and sit outside so the sunshine can make you feel better? Nature is the best medicine, as I always say!”

Yes. Please. “But, I really shouldn’t…” Keith puts up a little bit of a fight.

“Come on, little bro! Work-life balance and everything! You can’t study when you’re too tired and feeling bad. Just a leeetle bit of rest, and I won’t tell Mama if you won’t.”

“Hm, okay then. I’ll come with you then, sister. Only for a little bit though.” Yes. Yes. Thank you for saving me, Katarina!

“Great!” Katarina grabs his hand and drags him out of his room. Keith sighs in relief as he follows behind his sister. He can think about what to do about Raphael another day. It’s not like he has a procrastination problem that will cause him to forget, of course.

(The author notes that Keith does in fact, have a terrible procrastination problem. Keith will forget about all of this until he opens the notebook again. Now, will he remember to open the notebook for the next seven years or will he just tell himself that he has the crucial info in his head? Place your bets now, folks!)

Scenario 4: lesbian dodges a bullet

Mary is incredibly excited to visit Katarina again. Katarina is sweet, charming, and appreciates Mary’s gardening skills. She’s perfect. Mary’s determined to gain the girl’s affection, no matter what it takes!

Stepping off her carriage, she is greeted by an enthusiastic Katarina who hugs her immediately.

“Mary, you’re here! I can’t wait for you to see the new vegetables I managed to plant! I need your help for sure….” Katarina continues chattering as Mary basks in the hug. So nice.

Except unlike the normal Katarina that Mary is coming to know and love, Katarina abruptly stops and jumps back. She begins muttering to herself very quickly.

Mary asks, “Katarina, is something wrong? You don’t seem quite yourself?”

“Ah! Mary I’m so sorry but I forgot. I have to rescue my little brother from his studying today. He easily gets tired and a little weak when he stays inside too long, so as a good older sister I have to help by taking him outside. You wouldn’t mind if he hangs out with us for today, would you?” Katarina gives Mary puppy eyes.

Personally, Mary does not really get it. It being normal, healthy sibling relationships. But if it makes Katarina happy, then she can sit through dealing with whatever Katarina’s brother is like. She says, “Of course. Whatever you want, Katarina.”

“Awesome! I’ll meet you around by the fields with Keith. See you soon, Mary!” And Katarina zooms off into the mansion.

Mary starts walking towards the back where Katarina last showed her the plants and such. So Katarina’s little brother is called Keith. Mary heard that he was adopted, so she wonders if he is very much like Katarina at all. He might be a horrible buzzkill. Even worse, he might try and keep all of Katarina’s love and attention!

Mary bristles at the thought. Naturally, she will have to put a stop to that. She makes it to the field and sits down under a tree to wait for Katarina. As she waits, she starts making up plans to bring down this possible rival of hers. Mary Hunt will take no prisoners in the war of love!

It’s not long before Katarina appears in view, running at full speed while dragging someone behind her. She skids to a stop in front of Mary, grinning beautifully. Mary thinks she’s in love.

“Mary, you made it here! I mean, of course, you would. Hey, you haven’t met Keith yet right? Here he is!” Katarina pulls someone in front of her like she’s showing off a prized horse. Mary looks at the person, who is wearing a truly enormous sunhat. Is this Keith?

“Sister! That’s not how you should introduce people to me!” The sunhat says. It does sound like a boy, so it must be Keith.

He takes off the hat, a little out of breath. Keith bows a little and then smiles. “You’re lady Mary, right? Katarina told me all about you. Thank you so much for being a good friend to my sister.” Then he bows again and beams at her.

Mary is hit with the distinct realization that if she wasn’t so in love with Katarina, her heart would be stirring at that very instant. If she liked boys, she would be in grave danger! This boy is far too cute. Her heart feels a little like it’s melting, instead. How could she ever have even thought of considering such a polite and adorable boy to be her rival? His cute fluffy hair, that she wants to ruffle. His tiny hands that she wants to squeeze. What is this madness?

“I’m proud to be friends with Katarina,” she manages. “Pleased to meet you, lord Keith.”

“Ah, please just call me Keith, I don’t need to be called by my title in front of someone so close to the family.”

Mary is overjoyed. Keith isn’t dissimilar from Katarina! Just like his sister, he’s so kind to someone he’s just met. She nods her head in agreement.

Keith, meanwhile, makes himself comfortable in the space directly under the tree branches. He seems to want to nap. Katarina sits next to him, gently running her fingers through his hair and humming. Mary is struck by how loving this pair of siblings is, how they seem to just enjoy being in the same space together. She wishes that she could have had that same love with her sisters, too.

Katarina looks up and brings a finger to her lips. “We gotta stay quiet so Keith can have his rest,” she whispers.

She strokes Keith’s head one more time before stealthily getting up. Then, she grabs Mary’s hand (!) and leads her a little ways away into the fields. Mary’s heart thumps a little at the thought that Katarina wants to be alone with her, instead of staying with Keith. Still, she has a couple of questions about Keith that she wants to ask Katarina at the same time.

Mary turns to Katarina. “Why does Keith,” she almost calls him lord Keith, “wear such a large sunhat?”

Katarina lets out a sort of sigh. “He doesn’t like to tell anyone about it, but Keith’s actually pretty delicate. His magic is strong but he gets sunstroke so easily, and he also gets tired often. And what’s worse is that he seems to think that we don’t want to know about it so we can help him.”

“Oh dear, that’s difficult. I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright though. I’m always going to be here for him, so I’ll make sure that he is taken care of. As a good older sister, I must look after my cute little bro!”

“You’re such a wonderful sister already, Katarina.” Mary looks back earnestly at her.

“And you’re such a wonderful friend too, Mary!” Katarina almost yells, but hushes herself in time with a quick glance back at the napping Keith. He stirs a little bit, but settles back down with a short huff of breath. Mary and Katarina sigh in relief.

“Although.”

“Although?” She prompts Katarina, who leans heartstoppingly close to her face.

“You can’t tell anyone this, ok? But I’m seventy-five percent certain that my - erm - fiancé, you know…Prince Geordo? I really think that he’s trying to get Keith’s heart or something!”

Mary gasps. No way is Prince Geordo trying to scoop two Claes for the price of one. Also, isn’t this technically two-timing on Katarina then? She’s angry for her, even if she doesn’t want Katarina’s engagement to work out. Only a terrible guy would go to visit the house of his fiancée to try and seduce her brother.

Actually, the more she thinks about it, isn’t it also sorta mean to Keith? Isn’t this just basically Prince Geordo saying “You’ll be my sidepiece” to this fluffy little boy!?!

(It really isn’t, actually, but Mary will for sure stick to the narratives she has created in her head. The reason it isn’t two-timing is because there is no timing to begin with! Katarina also loves to create narratives in her mind, and in that way her and Mary aren’t badly matched at all, haha.)

Mary stares passionately into Katarina’s eyes. At that moment, she solemnly swears aloud, “Katarina. I understand. I will join you in your noble quest to protect Keith’s innocence.”

Katarina smiles back at her. Mary swoons.

“I knew I could count on you!”

Keith, who has just stirred awake, only understands that his sister and Mary are bonding really fast. Like, incredibly fast. Holy shit, he thinks. Maria is going to have some competition. But it’s so nice out. And he could really do with another nap….

He falls asleep again, unaware that the Keith Protection Squad has just held its inaugural meeting.

Omake:

Katarina, excited: we have Mary on our side! Nothing can go wrong! And also Mary is definitely just doing this because she sees how cute Keith is and wants to protect him. Just like me! We are gonna be such great Friends!

The suspiciously Alan-shaped shadow looming over the next chapter: Boo, bitch.