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The New Year started early in the Harmon-Watts household. Everyone had been up late celebrating the night before except Alma June who had fallen asleep around her normal bedtime. So of course she was up bright and early and--predictably--she was mad she missed the ball dropping on tv. By the time Alma June had been diverted from having a full meltdown that would have woken up all the other kids it was too late for Beth to go back to sleep. Beth had thrown on clothes and stumbled downstairs to find someone else was up early and had at least started coffee. Not that coffee was going make 3 hours feel like a good night's sleep. But when had Beth ever gotten a good night's sleep in the first place? She was still trying force her eyes open when Townes came in, freshly showered and wearing a charcoal gray sweater and black pants. It wasn't fair he could look that put together on so little sleep. "Good morning," he said. "Roger will be down in a minute. He said he would do breakfast if you want. He has some new recipes since last time you came to brunch."
"Thank goodness for Roger. I'm not ready for the full family circus just yet. Alma June by herself is more than enough." Beth said tiredly.
“I thank goodness for Roger all the time.” He said smoothly, pouring himself a cup of coffee and sitting down at the table where they had been talking last night. He reached out to gently squeeze her shoulder. “But what do you need?”
“Come for a walk with me? We’ve been too many people cooped up in the same house the last few days and I feel like I might explode at someone if I don’t get outside for a little.”
It took a few minutes to get dressed in hats and coats and all their winter gear. By then Roger had come down. Beth hugged him and said she was very grateful for his offer to do breakfast. Then they made their escape before anyone else could stop them.
Townes smiled when Beth slipped her hand in his coat pocket where his hand was staying warm. He held her hand in his pocket as it warmed up. They walked to a tiny city park a few blocks away from the house. There was a kids’ playground, some benches, and even a couple of stone tables with chess boards inset in the tops.
They sat on one of the benches. It was still early and they were the only ones in the park, though they could see joggers and dog walkers passing by on the street.
They sat on the park bench leaning against each other in their winter coats watching their breath make white clouds in the air and reminiscing.
“Sometimes I miss when you still lived in Lexington and we could hang out all the time.” Townes said. “Especially at that diner by your old house.”
She smiled. “Brooklyn has so many great diners. But I miss that place too. You can’t get grits or good biscuits and gravy this far north.”
“It was a while ago, but the last time I was in there one of the waitresses remembered you and asked how you were doing.”
“Which waitress, the one with the tall blond hairdo? What was her name? Betty Sue? I remember noticing we had the same first name. She always came and talked to me when I came in by myself. What did you tell her?”
“I said you had a loving husband and three beautiful little girls up in New York. And that you had the highest chess rating in the world.” She smiled at that last part.
“At least you didn’t tell her I was happy.”
“Aren’t you? Happy I mean.”
“Sometimes I am, most of the time even. I feel like I should be. But sometimes I’m too busy and tired to notice. We had a lot of good times this week but this past year has been so hard.” He put an arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer. When he didn’t say anything she continued. “I do miss it sometimes. I had so much freedom then, when I lived in Alma’s little blue house by myself. But I was lonely a lot and pretty much of a mess. You and Roger were so good to me back then. There were weeks when I practically lived at your place.” She sighed and leaned her head against him. The wool of his coat was rough against her cheek. She couldn’t imagine how they put up with her then-or why- with her insomnia and waking them up with her nightmares. But they’d never complained.
He smiled fondly and leaned his cheek against the top of her head. “I liked having you there. And you’re welcome to come visit any time. I’m serious. My New Year’s Resolution is for us to keep in better touch this year. Maybe visit more than once or twice in a year.” Townes said.
“I’d like that. I don’t know how I’ll juggle everything but I’ll figure something out.”
“Maybe You could come down in the summer when your girls are out of school?”
“Maybe. We could take them to that park you and Roger took me too that time when you were trying to cheer me up. The one with the lake and all the fireflies.” She didn’t mention that was right after the first time she’d relapsed after Moscow, a three-day bender on the anniversary of Alma’s death. They both remembered and that was enough.
“The girls would love the fireflies.” Townes offered after a pause that lasted a little too long.
Beth laughed “And Alma June would ask a hundred questions about what makes them glow.”
“Yeah, probably,” he agreed with a smile.
“Did I ever tell you thank you? For that day and so many others. Did you know the only thing that made me drag myself to those Tuesday therapy sessions at first was knowing we would get together for take out on Tuesday nights? God, it seems like forever ago,” she said.
“It was twelve, no thirteen years ago. A lot has changed.”
She let out a self depreciating snort. “Not that much. I'm still fucked up. But I went back to therapy last month.”
“I'm glad.”
She bumped against his shoulder. “You're glad I'm fucked up?”
He laughed. “I'm used to that but I'm glad you have a therapist again.”
“I needed one. Benny was so good to me and I was being awful back.”
“If you had told me sooner I would have tried to help too you know.”
“Thanks. But I just wasn't ready to talk about it yet.”
Townes pulled her closer. She pushed her cold nose past his scarf and against his neck. "You know, our old deal still stands. If you need me you can call anytime, day or night. Especially if you're having a hard time,” he said.
“I know that, thanks.” She sat with her head tucked under his chin and smelled his aftershave in the crisp winter air. It was the most calm and settled she'd felt in months. In a few minutes she’d have to go back and face breakfast and kids and chaos but for now it was nice to have a peaceful moment with her best friend.