Chapter Text
Chapter 1
The princess and the pea*
Another story, another useless day with a useless heroine.
Buddy already had a headache because of the perpetual banging on the great wooden door of his castle, was almost on the verge of throwing his chalice with his second round of wine out of the window to silence this outrageous cacophony of this pet peeve. Instead, he left his drink and reluctantly walked to the source of the brawling and tore the door open.
“Oh, good morning Mr. I-love-to-ignore-the-fantastic-heroine-Goth. It’s about time, dude! How much longer were you planning to make me wait?!”
“My entire life,” Buddy responded curtly and slammed the door shut, leaving a dumbfounded and right after seething blond boy standing outside. How was it possible to be so short but so torturous?!
“Buddy! Open up at last! I can do this all day long!”
That’s what the villainess feared the most, why he sighed heavily before he let the nuisance in.
The next step was to introduce the good-for-nothing prince to the wannabe princess and what her task was to approve to be the right one for him.
The queen promenaded through the castle and stopped in front of a bedroom. Chase was pretty clueless as always about the plot of the story why his jaw dropped after Buddy opened the door to present the princess’s chamber.
And her bed.
With at least ten mattresses stacked high like a royal tower of nonsense.
“You will sleep here on this bed for the next three days.”
Chase shot his rival a disbelieving glare.
“You can’t be serious.”
Buddy's only answer was a disparaging “Hmph” and Chase groaned at this impossible sleeping arrangement.
“And how do you expect me to get up there?!”
“Figure it out yourself, you imbecile.”
Buddy was not really in the mood for any lengthy elaborations and left the room, couldn’t see the outburst of the heroine.
In the late afternoon, after a boring conversation with the prince and an even more boring dinner, Chase went to his chamber and looked upwards to the tower of mattresses. Grumpy as a cat being stepped on its tail, he stuffed a leftover roll from dinner into his mouth before facing his true enemy — that ridiculously tall bed.
“Who thought this would be a good idea?!” he growled silently and started his ascent.
“At least a ladder would’ve been nice.”
“Oh, that would be too easy, brat,” it came from behind and startled him. He lost his grip and fell on his bottom, to Buddy’s amusement, who suppressed a laugh.
“OW! You jerk!”
Chase glanced back furiously to see the queen leaning in the door frame, smiling with all the smugness someone could have.
“Why do you permanently get on my nerves, brat?!” he snarled at him, rubbing his aching bum when he got up.
With rolling eyes, Buddy huffed contemptuously and shifted off the frame.
“I want your key and I will be there wherever in whatever story you pop in, you budget version of a heroine! Until you give up!” The villainess glared at him menacingly, but Chase got the feeling that most of the stuff the other said was only hot air.
“I want your key, I want your key!” he mocked him.
“Change the tune for a change, Buddy!”
The blond began to climb up the tower again and with a lot of huffing and puffing he reached the top. But right after he pushed his face into a pillow and growled in it with a muffling sound.
“What, brat,” Buddy arched an eyebrow.
“I need to pee.”
That came so blatantly that the raven haired looked at him slyly.
“Are you an idiot?”
A stifled groan.
“Most of the time I’m a genius, but I have my moments.”
“More the other way around, if you ask me.”
“Shut it, jerk.”
Later, after one visit to the bathroom (Buddy had left him meanwhile) and a tedious climb up again, he could find some sleep. Or he thought so at least.
He tried to listen to the serene night, being all peaceful and sober from any noises besides the ones creatures were doing outside, far far away. Blueish light filtered through the windowpane, casting a pale silver hue across the room and illuminating the dust motes that floated lazily in the still air.
Nevertheless, Chase’s thoughts were having a race. About his mom, about how he had to fight always to get the minimum of narratonin. And then what Buddy had implied hit him — and bothered him more than he wanted to admit.
“I’m not stupid,” he murmured and tossed and turned in his bed. But not too much, since he feared to fall from this tower.
Great, now he couldn’t get rid of this idea that he might break his neck, while he slept. One wrong turn and it's over. And he liked his neck intact.
Wide awake and very angry about himself, his stupid imagination and above all about the villainess, he sent some swearing against the ceiling. This would ruin his beauty sleep for sure…
Dawn arrived the next day and a tired and worn out heroine shuffled through the halls of the castle. When he entered the room where they had breakfast, he joined that club by banging his head on the table after he took a seat.
Buddy watched him with such pure astonishment, that he even dropped his food back on his plate. He never expected the other boy to do exactly what he was supposed to do, in particular not to get a wink of sleep.
There was no way that this twit would follow the story’s plot!
Well, he would make sure that this won’t last long and made the other quit…
When the next night began, Chase, absolutely exhausted, went to his chamber only to see even more mattresses on his bed.
“What the heck is that?!!” He rubbed his face in frustration, but he would not give up so easily. This time he used the curtain to climb up and swing like a vine onto the top of his bed. For a moment he was afraid that this tower would collapse, after he landed on it, it started to shake like a wiggly tubeman, but luckily it came to a halt as Chase stood still, sweating.
Again, the night was silent and again, he couldn’t find any sleep. Suddenly someone broke the quietness and, though he would never admit it, he didn't feel completely alone anymore.
“Hey, are you still awake?”
Chase fidgeted and looked hesitantly down from his bed. There was Buddy standing again at the room's entrance, with his arms crossed and a sullen gaze.
“What do you want, jerk.” He was too tired to argue.
“Don’t tell me you actually can sense it!”
The raven haired sounded a bit agitated and confused at the same time.
“Sense what?”
Eyes went big like plates and the villainess stomped to Chase’s bed to reach under the second mattress from the bottom.
“This here!” With irritation he showed a small round something, for what Chase needed to squint to register, what Buddy held between his thumb and index finger.
“Is that a pea?!”
Buddy pinched his nose bridge aggravated, couldn't believe what he heard.
“I knew it… You don't even know the title of this story!”
“What do you expect from me, dude?!”
“That you read a tale before creating a disastrous mess!”
Anger hung in the air — both boys fuming, until Chase harrumphed.
“Fine! So I was supposed to sense this little crumb under this mattress sandwich?” He pointed to both, gave him a look of disbelief. He knew Buddy well enough for being a nasty prick when it came to mob someone out.
“Because as a real princess you have skin like alabaster. Very sensitive, why she has sleeping problems.” With his chin slightly lifted, Buddy gave the impression that sleeping on twenty mattresses was simply standard procedure to find out if someone was a real princess.
The blond quirked his eyebrows doubtfully.
“Well, not happening, Buddy. Never ever!” He threw his hands in the air. “There’s no way someone’s skin is that delicate!”
This was getting ridiculous.
“What? You rather want me to put a bowling ball under your not so delicate body?!” Buddy was upset by this spoiled brat and was tempted to yank him right off that absurd pile of mattresses. But when he heard a giggle from above, he faltered. It sounded light and wholehearted, without any ill intent. It was the first time he heard the heroine laugh that way.
“Didn’t know that you could be so funny, Buddy…,” Chase stated with a smile, his gaze so soft.
In an instant Buddy broke eye contact and turned around. He hadn't expected his opponent to look at him without contempt for once.
“Whatever, brat. Have a bad night.”
“I’ll do my best~”
With very mixed feelings and a ‘Hmph’, the villainess left the chamber, while Chase rolled onto his back. But this time he wasn’t anxious or upset like the night before. He was wide awake, hummed some songs from his beloved StarBrigade and let his thoughts trail off fantasizing some couple moments with Alastair. Until the birds started to sing again.
After getting up — or better down his bed — with a sleepy dreamy smile, he roamed through the castle and missed the banquet hall.
“Where do you think you’re going,” a voice came from behind and Chase stopped in a very wobbly way. Like in slow motion he turned around to face Buddy, who was tapping his foot with impatience.
“G’morning…,” the blond yawned, stumbled to his opponent and nearly fell to the ground when Buddy didn’t catch him.
“Stop fooling around, idiot. Fine, you didn’t sleep, bravo,” he remarked with a sarcastic tone, “Now stop being a pest and go somewhere else.”
“But I’m hungry…,” Chase rubbed his eyes, utterly fatigued, and the queen was giving an exasperated look. That boy was the very definition of a hopeless case, and if an outsider didn't know any better, they'd say Buddy was actually buying into that kind of irresistibly foolish charm.
He went back to the banquet hall, with a good mix of irritation, to get a bread roll.
“Here and now go.”
“Buddy, you big dummy…” The heroine looked at the food with scrutiny, still very tired.
“I have celiac. So if you want to end me with this gluten bomb, I will put an end to you with even tighter pants!”
This was enough for the raven haired. He stuffed the bread roll directly in the other’s mouth by pinching his nose.
So much for foolish charm — he was the walking definition of dumbness!
“This is all fictional, moron! No food made from here or in any other story can harm you. Now go!” He pushed him in the direction where the princess’s chamber was and wandered off, had enough of this decidedly not adorable idiot.
Chase munched on the bread roll and was quite happy.
As the day progressed, Buddy took a stroll through the castle to pass the time and when he reached the vestibule, he couldn’t believe his eyes. There was a mattress laying at the top of a grand staircase.
“What is this idiot planning now?!” He massaged his forehead to prevent an incoming headache.
His question was answered promptly, when a certain boy came running from the side and jumped on the mattress. No fatigue apparent.
“Wohoo!”
And off he went, surfing the stairs down! Buddy rushed bewildered to the handrail. At this point, he gave up believing the other possessed even a shred of common sense.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing, you discount version of intelligence?!”
Chase raised his head to see the other and smiled cheekily. The insult soared right over him.
“Oh, hey Buddy! Yes, uhm, just having fun?”
“Princesses don’t ride mattresses!”
“Oh come on! There are plenty left to sleep on!”
This utterly baffled the raven haired immensely! He never met someone to be this carefree and airheaded at the same time. With a huff of exasperation at this walking embodiment of impertinence, he turned on his heel and left the vestibule. The so-called princess would see what happened when he got in someone’s way.
Trust me, Buddy has zero tolerance for unprofessionalism.
The night descended and it was still and calm. Until…
“NOOO!” After dinner, Chase entered his chamber for the last sleepover in this story only to discover his bed being stacked up with a total of twenty mattresses. And no curtains this time.
“You. Are. KIDDING ME?!” He facepalmed with both hands in desperation, which turned into anger, when Buddy drew his attention to himself.
“Any problem, princess?” he asked Chase with a sickly sweet voice.
“You! You seriously want me to end up in a full body cast, huh?!”
Buddy shrugged when he walked up to the other boy.
“Well, that’s how the story goes~ The queen tests the alleged princess of her true heritage and this last night is of course the most sophisticated one.”
If you could see the flames in Chase’s eyes… the whole place would be burnt down by now.
But he had to get this done, if he wanted the full amount of narratonin for his wish. Nevertheless he couldn’t suppress his complaint:
“And what about a ladder this time?? There’s no way the queen let the princess climb up this tower of death all by herself!”
“Oh that. Yeah, I got rid of it.”
A big smirk settled on Buddy’s lips while he checked his nails, while Chase had to summon every ounce of self-control not to jump him and strangle him.
“Have fun with your tower of death, little idiot. I have other business to do~” He distanced himself from the heroine, but he didn’t get far because, without warning, this very little idiot grabbed his hand firmly. The strength of this grip startled the goth, making him glance sharply at his rival.
“You won’t go anyway! If you want to finish this story, you should better help me, big idiot!”
“Wha..”
Okay, Buddy had to admit it, he hadn’t thought it through to the end. Maybe it got a bit out of hand, but watching the blond struggle? Call it his guilty pleasure.
“And what should I do in your opinion?? A human ladder?!”
The answer was a wide grin.
“Oh no…”
Minutes later you could watch two boys bickering how to get the blond on top of this shaky tower.
“Have you never made a human ladder?! You need to intertwine your fingers like this and create a step for me!”
“I know how to do this, brat! Now come here!”
Chase didn’t need to be told twice and he took a bit of a run-up before he used Buddy’s hands. At the same time the raven haired boosted him upwards, allowing Chase to reach higher. With a belly flop he landed on top, but only his upper part.
“Get your butt up.”
“Quiet in the cheap seats!” Chase snapped back and heaved to his knees.
When he finally lay on the top mattress, something came to his mind and he perked up, a thought suddenly striking him.
“Oh, I forgot something!”
Buddy’s eye twitched.
“If you need to go to the bathroom, I won’t help you again, moron!” His disgust was unmistakable, and he was seconds away from walking off, done with the whole charade.
“No no no! I forgot my bag below!”
With an incredulous look and complete lack of understanding, the goth surveyed the room and found it in one corner.
“Now I act like his servant… Wonderful..,” he grunted while he went for it and held it up. Chase was able to grab the shoulder strap, was a little happy that the other didn't act like a jerk for a minute.
“Thanks, Buddy!”
But for some inexplicable reason the villainess didn’t loosen his hold on the bag.
“Hey! Let go!”
Well, at least thirty seconds.
A sly smile appeared on Buddy’s lips and tugged the bag more to his side.
“Hmm, maybe I can find some information about you.”
Yup, his guilty pleasure resurfaced once again.
Chase didn’t like the way the other looked at him and his personal stuff.
“Th..there is nothing of interest in there!” he blushed and tried to pull his bag up.
“Oh really?” With a malicious smirk he started pulling down.
“Stop it!” But the queen didn’t listen and got a bit more persistent.
Chase’s eyes narrowed with aggravation and his gaze went dull.
“I said stop it, Buddy.”
Monotonously, almost cold was his voice, which made the goth stir surprised. Never had he heard the other being so.. so aloof. He only knew him being boisterous and easy to tease. That he also had a standoffish side was new.
Out of the blue — defying every known law of physics and probably breaking every fairytale rule ever written — the princess effortlessly hoisted his bag, including the person still attached to it, in a single swing right up onto the mattress beside him.
Everything happened so fast, Buddy couldn't even process it.
“W–wha… what?!”
Totally stunned, he gawked at his opponent as the wobbly tower beneath them shifted dangerously.
Did that seriously just happen? How?!
When Chase yanked his bag back out of his hands and clutched it tightly at his chest, the sparkle in his honey dipped eyes came back, as well as his typical childish attitude.
“Don’t mess with me, Buddy!”
It was strange in a way, because the way he reacted made it clear that whatever was in that bag meant a lot to him.
But as he opened his bag…
“A face mask?!”
… was revealed.
Yes, the little blond brought his skin care ensemble with him and yes, he was dead serious about it.
“One laugh and I kick you down,” Chase glared at him while he unfolded the mask.
There was something striking about how unabashed he carried out his nightly routine though the other boy was watching — so natural, so unfiltered. As if acting this way around him was a normal thing. A real thing.
Buddy peeked over the edge of the bed, backed away respectfully after he saw the true height and, since he couldn't change the situation about it anyway, he shrugged and lay down leisurely, obviously settling in.
“Do as you please,” he waved a hand at the blond, like he was saying ‘go on’.
Astonishment all over the princess.
“What? No sneer? No disparaging remarks??”
“No, not today.” And with that, Buddy crossed his arms behind his head and closed his eyes.
“Uhm, hello? What's that supposed to be now?” Chase was somewhat baffled, “You can't stay here!”
“Thanks to you I can and I will. My bed is one mile on the ground as a result of your stupidity, brat,” Buddy pointed to the ground, showing no sign of moving anytime soon.
“So you have all night to find out to get us down without any complications.” That last comment may have been more smug than vicious, but that was splitting hairs, as far as Chase was concerned. The princess looked daggers at him, huffed in annoyance and finally put the face mask on.
Without the other noticing, Buddy peeked to the side with one half-lidded eye. He watched the blond boy as he started patting the mask to make it sit right, being all pouty.
‘That’s… kind of cute…’ flashed through Buddy’s mind—only for him to flinch at the thought.
‘Wait, what!’ He squeezed his eyes shut again, shook his head and turned to the side, with his back facing the other boy.
“If a certain big idiot didn’t make a ladder disappear, we wouldn’t be in this trouble! And stealing someone’s bag is such a no-go, man!” Chase nagged and took off the mask back in a plastic bag to dispose of it later. He heard a shift from his rival and glanced at the back of the other's head.
“I’m sorry.”
Big eyes went even bigger, because it actually felt like he meant it. Did he mishear or did Buddy right now…
In any case his heart took a faster pace and he positioned himself beside the other, pulled his knees to his chest.
He didn’t know why he was all so nervous. It’s not like he never had a sleepover until now, but it was always with someone not so…
Buddy budged and seemed to fall asleep, turned over so Chase could see his soft facial features.
‘...handsome…,’ it came to his mind, but he quickly corrected himself, ‘No! Jerk! I wanted to say jerk!’
A pink blush came upon his cheeks, shaking his head vehemently, as if dumb thoughts were hanging in his hair.
Unfortunately his eyes were glued to Buddy's fair skin, his long eye lashes, just him lying there so calm and peaceful.
‘If only we don’t keep arguing…’
Before he was aware of his next action, his hand reached out to brush a strand of hair away from this good-looking face. So soft. All of a sudden, so touchable.
Without thinking his fingers glided through the other’s hair, causing him to sigh in the end. Chase’s hand flinched away, when the blond realized what he was doing. His cheeks burnt up in many shades, accompanied with something throbbing harder against his chest than before, and he squeezed his own face out of excitement.
Yeah, this night would definitely be another one without any sleep…
A new morning dawned, and the birds were chirping happily. Chase sat upright with his legs drawn up, tiredly hugging them. He never stopped watching the other boy sleeping until this special someone began to wake up and stretched his arms.
“Good morning sunshine~ Been awake for a while?”
“Haha, I'm dying of laughter,” Chase moped sourly—his underbags were very prominent.
“So? Any solution to how we get down?”
In stark contrast to our weary heroine, Buddy appeared well-rested and lay sideways, head in hand.
“Yep, hold on tight.”
Although the princess was very exhausted, he pulled himself together and crawled over his bedmate, causing a phenomenal flush on his face. Call it boldness or exhaustion—take your pick.
Anyway, he climbed over the edge and wedged his feet between two mattresses underneath him. With all the strength he had left, he pushed a mattress one by one to the other side, beginning from the top. They were now unevenly aligned, resembling a deck of cards about to tip over.
Buddy had regained his composure and wanted to complain about this nonsense, but he was too slow. Chase already jumped up back, sitting next to him and completely threw their tower off balance.
“Wh..what the..!!”
As it tipped to the side, Buddy reflexively shut his eyes and frantically grabbed Chase’s arm. The blond just kept staring blankly ahead as their mattress fell from the top to the floor, sliding a few more feet until it came to a stop.
Buddy, a little shaken and with tousled hair.
Chase, entirely unimpressed, his gaze dull with fatigue.
“Ground floor. Please visit us again,” the smaller one joked and looked unsteady to the raven haired who was still clinging to him.
“Buddy?” The addressed one snapped out of his stupor, and fear turned into anger.
“Have you completely lost it?! How could you go through with such a reckless stunt?!?”
What irritated Buddy more was the others' motionless staring.
“Hello??”
“Did I pass?” Chase’s voice was weak, his eyes half-closed. He looked like he would drop dead any moment, thanks to sleep deprivation which was fully present now.
And then it hit Buddy like a blow. It was only natural that his opponent was exhausted, when he pulled a three all-nighters, even when time in fairytales went a little faster than normal.
He let go of the arm and suddenly the blond toppled forward only to land on Buddy’s shoulder.
“Did I pass…,” he mumbled against him and the villainess couldn’t resist anymore and chuckled quietly.
“Yes, you did.” Instantly, like a switch had been flipped, the heroine collapsed to the side and was dead asleep within seconds.
Amid the usual commotion of the castle, only quiet breathing reached his ears—and for the first time, Buddy wondered if spending time with him hadn’t been a complete waste after all.
Well… the little heroine had been surprisingly agreeable — and hadn’t pushed him off the mattress tower.
He suppressed another silent laugh and wanted to cover him, when he noticed that he had the blond’s duvet all the time. His gaze shifted between the blanket and the little idiot, and something stirred within him—something that might’ve been called fondness.
‘Did he…’ Leaving the thought hanging, he slid the blanket off and gently draped it over the sleeping figure.
“This could be really interesting with him,” he said silently when he stood up and left the chamber, closing the slightly creaking door behind him, until a soft click sounded.
End of The princess and the pea