Work Text:
“So how’ve things been going in Ye Olde Toon Town?” Rose asked, not looking up from watering her bed of Silly Lilies and Upsy Daises. The small indigo-blue bat sitting at her garden table hummed for a moment before replying “Well… I might’ve stolen a cog.”
…
“...You what?”
Rose Pinkermew and Starry Nightfly had been friends for years, both delighting in the other’s company and sharing in their reluctance to fight the robots the other toons waged their war against.
Of course, not fighting wasn’t always an option, between the cogs roaming the streets and invading shops and the… well it wasn’t mandatory per say, but all toons were heavily e ncouraged to “fight the good fight” and it was more than generally frowned upon to abstain unless you had good reason.
Rose had grown up in the Brrrgh helping out at her father’s shop, Mittens for Kittens, so aside from the occasional cog taking over the building, the lanky pink cat never had to do much fighting herself and she was never expected to. When she moved to Daffodil Gardens to follow her dreams of becoming a gardener, however, the expectations changed.
Starry on the other hand was an interesting case. There were rumors she’d been raised by a cog, which was supposedly the reason for her occasionally odd behavior, but few could deny that her homemade sweets weren’t some of the best out there. They could live with the sarcasm and puns if it meant they could get their hands on saltwater taffy and peppermints freshly made that very morning for pretty reasonable prices.
The two had crossed paths one day as Starry was out delivering sweets.
Now, Rose had a…quirk as some would call it. She had a bad habit of ending up in places she had no right to be, on the roof of buildings that had been taken over, behind impossibly tall fences, stuck waist deep in a hole in the street, or as it was today, up in a tree on the side of road.
“HELP”
“Uh, you alright up there?”
“NO VERY MUCH NOT”
“Want some help?”
“PLEASE”
It only took about 2 hours to get her down and back on solid ground, and the two had been inseparable as friends ever since.
That being said, the two did have to part ways occasionally, usually on orders from the toon council for one or the other to head out to a particular playground to “do their part” in fighting COGS. Starry had been sent out to “help” in Ye Olde Toon Towne until just recently.
“Starry Nightflight, I am proud of your progress but I musn’t delay you… There’s been an issue here in the land of Ye Olde Toon Towne, and we need your help.
You see, these cogs are nothing special to us, having invaded for some time now, but there was one that WAS special.
A skeleton cog unlike anything we’ve ever seen before, having only seen cogs in their outer suits as they are on our streets. They came here with a plan in mind to brainwash our people. To turn toons into mindless workers obeying their robotic orders… We fooled them into believing we were falling into their trap… It allowed us three Elders to capture them and lock them away in the dungeon.”
Well that didn’t sound ethical in the slightest, Starry thought, her face scrunching slightly.
Al took this as a sign to continue the story in lieu of a response.
“Ever since that day, we’ve kept the door in the dungeon locked, hoping nothing would ever have come from it. But we fear the cell we gave them will not last forever, and eventually they will get loose once more. We fear what may happen if that day were to come.”
And with that, the bat toon was told the password to open the dungeon gate and promptly shuffled out the door without another word.
None of that interaction sat right with Starry, the way that Al spoke about the suit felt… off, like he was telling her a well practiced lie. Regardless, no matter what way you looked at it keeping a suit locked up like that wasn’t right either.
Not all suits were as out for ink as Prester was, Starry knew that from first hand experience. There was a good chance that the prisoner the elders had locked up was just some poor suit who was just trying to do their job and ended up in the line of fire.
Well, she wouldn’t know for sure until she went to see for herself, so she started off towards the dungeon.
If Starry had to use just one word to describe the dungeon, it was cold. If she had to use two, it would be cold and damp. Two of the worst things a place could be simultaneously and it was giving her a serious case of the heebie-jeebies.
Rows of cages lined the walls leading towards the gate, all of them empty save for one. There was a green pig lounging lazily against the wall inside, making it the only occupied cell despite the fact its door was wide open. Weird. Weird guy just hanging out in an open cell in a cold, damp dungeon.
His nametag claimed him to be one "Timmy Riddle", his epithet being simply "Prisoner".
How helpful.
Now, normally when confronting a powerful suit, toons would group up in a small pack, often with close friends they knew well for the strategic advantage, and more rarely with strangers when they were in desperate need for strength in numbers.
Starry could send out a call, ask Rose to accompany her just in case things went sour, but the cat had finally scheduled an optometrist visit for today and she wasn't about to give her friend any way to wiggle out of getting it done (as she'd done many times already). There also wasn't a snowball's chance in hell she was going to trust a buncha randos not to just wreck the poor suit before she got a chance to talk to them either.
Solo it was then.
Stepping up to the gate, Starry called out confidently "PORTCULLIS". Less than a moment later, the gate began to rise and allowed her entry into the deepest part of the dungeon.
At the end of the winding tunnel path stood a circular platform surrounded by a pit so dark it looked nearly bottomless and, given toon construction habits, it very well could be.
The only way onto the platform were four bridges across the gap, each leading to a similar entrance/exit like the one she was standing in right now.
It was somewhat puzzling, the fact that there was only one way down into the dungeons and yet this room seemed to have three other exits. Did the other doorways connect to the surface through hidden passages? Did they lead even deeper into the dungeon to more cells? If that was the case, why trap the suit in this room specifically and effectively block off access to the other areas??
Out of all the places in ToonTown, this place was the weirdest.
...
Besides Mezzo Melodyland perhaps.
Regardless, standing there on the edge of the platform was the skelecog, their frame bare of any outer shell that would otherwise cover the purple metal of their frame. They had been staring off into that ink-black void until they heard her approach. The dead silence in the dungeons made her footsteps seem thunderously loud in comparison.
As the suit turned around, they began to speak “A Toon! Hello-hello th- there!" Their voice crackled and fizzed like a broken cassette player that had been left in the rain “My na-name is Win- Winston but you can call me the P.R.-P.R.-R.-R. That's ‘Public rel-Relations Re-Re- Representative’ for sho-o-o-ort.” They twitched and shuddered as they continued, and yet they kept up the cheesy, toon-like grin that had come across their face as soon as they noticed Starry.
“It's been- been a while since I-I-I-I've spoken to- to a Toon! Do you know- know how lo-o-o-ong it's been since I've had- it's be- visitors? It's been- it's been- it's been-”
The suit froze, their swirled eyes glazing over as some component in their head screeched unpleasantly
“ERROR”
“Are you… okay?”
"HA. HAhaHaHaAAH HA! No."
“Well, what are you even doing here?”
“I was- I was sent to ta-talk to the Toons and convince- and convince- and convince them-m-m to- to me-e-et with my- with my- convince- bosses- I’ve got five- , but- but- elders lock- locked me- the elders locked me up do-o-own here! For some- For some- elders- for some reason!”
"'Some reason'? The elders said you were trying to hypnotize toons and force them to work for COGS." Starry crossed her arms, a skeptical look on her face. She was willing to give them the benefit of the doubt, if anyone was going to violate the tooneva convention and keep a prisoner of war in a place like this, it’d definitely be the elders…
"What? N-N-NO, it’s not good- it’s not- business to do- to do that! It was just s-s-s-self defense! The toons- toons were so nice- toons- and friendly-ly-ly, they said- wanted to have- to have- to have a party down he-here. But then- then- then they- toons- attacked me!" The suit nervously, and jittering-ly, wrung their hands, unable to meet her gaze.
"I tried to-... 'per-persuade' them but they- toons- locked me-me-me up down here in-instead. I-I-I-I wasn't- try-trying to hurt any- trying to- anybody"
That settled it, Winston could absolutely not stay here. They were imprisoned for trying to do their job just because the elders were being racist pricks (again). Winston had clearly been stuck here for so long in this damp dungeon that some of their major components must’ve gotten severely damaged. Starry was no lawbot, but the tooneva convention definitely said sick prisoners were supposed to be sent back to their home countries or whatever.
…
But given the fact it didn’t seem like COGS had made any real attempt to get Winston back and the way the company seemingly ran their employees into the ground, sending them back there might be just as much of a death sentence. Ultimately it was going to be their choice, but they had to get out of here first.
“Alright, here’s the deal. I don’t think the elders (those yee s) have any right to keep you down here, so I’m gonna let you out. I know the password for the gate thing and as long as you're coming with me it should be fine I think. C’mon."
Starry confidently headed towards the the exit, Winston skittering after her, their smile finally faltering and dropping entirely.
"It's not- it's not- it's not that easy, Toon Ma- Ma- Magic keeps me- keeps me Here."
To demonstrate, they reached out towards the doorway. As their hand passed through the arch, a set of oversized bars seemingly manifested from nowhere and slammed down to block the exit, causing Starry to jump a bit.
"See- See? They go away- see?- in a bit- bit. But I've been Stuck Here- Stuck Here- Here- for- for- for-" Winston froze again, which seemed to be a recurring problem for them "ERROR"
Starry’s ears drooped. Damn… There’s no way she can just leave them here for any longer than she has to, but…
“I’ll need to find some way to get rid of that magic…” the bat mused, she wouldn’t be able to do this on her own, she’d need to get help from someone who knew how to use the stuff, phooey.
Maybe she could convince the elders she needed to know the spell to ‘fight’ Winston?... No they probably wouldn't buy that… then they'd get suspicious of why she was asking and that'd lead to a whole lotta other problems.
Rose would be able to get them out probably, but her weird quirk wasn't exactly reliable and might dump the three of them out into the void for all they knew.
Then there was the pig toon back in that open cell, although maybe not by choice if the spell keeping Winston here was anything to go by… if anyone knew about the magic keeping them trapped, there was a good chance that toon knew something. And there was a better than zero chance they’d be willing to tell her about it!
First things first, she needed to wait for those magic bars to- oh, wait, yep, there they go. Like cotton candy dipped in water, the bars dissolved. That made things easier.
"Alright, I’m gonna go ask around about the spell that’s keeping you here, I’m gonna break it, and we’re gonna get you out of here.” she turned to leave but-
"PLEASE DON'T- DON'T- DON'T LEAVE ME- DON’T LEAVE- LEAVE ME HERE!" Winston screamed, suddenly grabbing her by the wrist before she could take a step.
She stiffened at the touch, it made sense why Winston would be freaking out about being alone again, heck she probably would be the same way if she'd been stuck down here for toon knows how long. Not to mention, they had no real reason to trust her, to trust that she’d live up to her word and come back.
The way they responded worried her too, had someone else been sent by the elders said something similar and then never returned, leaving Winston waiting and hoping they’d come back?
That’d track, to be honest with herself.
Awkwardly, she patted their shoulder with her free hand in what she hoped was a comforting gesture.
“Here.” Starry reached up and placed the well-loved trolley hat on the skelecog’s head, who seemed confused by the gesture “This hat is my favorite one, people practically can’t recognize me without it even! So if you have it, then I’ll hafta come back and get it, right?”
“A co-collateral?”
“Sure, if you wanna think of it like that. Either way, I’ll be back as soon as I can, promise!”
Finally reassured, Winston let go of her wrist with a sad smile and Starry made her way back up through the twisting tunnel to the outer part of the dungeon.
Rose was totally entranced, only looking away to pour them both a glass of lemonade, pink obviously.
“Jeez Louise this is wild! You know I could ask Mitzi to take a look and see if they could help with the bugginess-” “Oh no, I’m not letting you bring that deer anywhere near Winston, they’d probably turn ‘em into a washing machine or something!”
“Alright fine, I won’t mention it, sheesh” the cat held up her hands defensively. “What happened next?”
Next… next…
Oh yeah, Timmy.
“Pfft yeah, the spell locking up the inner dungeon is a simple one, but pretty oink -ing old, most toons nowadays wouldn't be able to make heads or tails of it, only the elders know how it's cast.”
“I didn't ask you how it's cast, I asked ya how to break it.”
“Heh, I mean, I could tell you… for the right price.”
It only took a bit of… persuasion before Timmy was squealing like a-
well, you know.
“Alright, alright! What you’re looking for is a book called ‘Easy Ancient Curses and Assorted Spells for Dummies’. Despite what the title would lead you to believe, it was actually quite complicated and most copies were thrown out except for one.” the pig smiled coyly as he pulled the hefty tome from his hammerspace “I never really bothered to read it, I was already a prodigy so what did I need it for other than a nice paperweight right? The counterspell you want should be in there somewhere kid”
“I’m older than you.” Starry deadpanned
He rolled his eyes and shoved the book in her hands “Whatever, you got what you need, good luck figuring it out.”
Well, the book was very strange, and kind of boring, but not too bad all things considered. It was more interesting than any of those instruction manuals she’d seen her mom reading in the past, that was for sure.
The spell itself wasn’t very complicated, much like Timmy had said, but real complexity came from trying to read old toon-ish, which was a pain that took forever to make heads or tails of.
She probably would’ve finished it in a day or two, if she hadn’t gotten distracted by Rose having another one of her ‘moments’ and somehow ending up in the freezer at Mozzarella Styx. That whole ordeal was even less fun than the stupid magic book. But thankfully, only a bit after retrieving her kitten-sicle, the book was finally making enough sense that Starry felt confident she could break the magic on the dungeon.
Armed now with the spell she needed, she made her way back into the dungeon early in the morning for… the heist.
Now there was at least one thing left to deal with, one loose end. While he may have pointed her in the right direction, Timmy himself was a liability who was very likely to rat her out to the elders if it got him a lighter sentence, or at least that was the vibe Starry got from him.
Well, a light sock to the face and he was out like a light (“One that was turned off!” as Rose would’ve said). Perfect.
Next, she once again prompted the gate blocking the way to open and began to make her way down the winding hallway. As she moved, she chanted under her breath “Abraca-pocus, by my will and focus, this suit I will take, I bid the spell to break.”
It admittedly sounded really stupid and silly to say out loud, hence mumbling it quietly instead, but hey! Toon magic hinged on silliness and no matter which way she tried to read it, this goofy chant was a crucial step in getting Winston out.
At least it wasn't a ‘clap your hands and believe!’ type of spell.
As she reached Winston's room, just before crossing the bridge, she performed the other part of the spell. Smearing the archway with runes made from the frosting of a cupcake and misting it with a quick spritz of seltzer should do the trick.
The spell complete, Starry’s ears pricked at the sound of Winston's voice across the space, quiet as if in disbelief.
“Y-y-you came back- came back…”
”Well obviously, I mean it’s just one counterspell.” she shrugged, as if spending the past few days learning ancient magic was on the same level as putting a shopping cart back in the corral “Ready to get outta here?”
“Is it- is- re-re-really safe- is it?”
“I think so, it wasn't that hard to do honestly.”
Winston gave a jittering nod of acknowledgement and slowly
Tentatively, they reached their hand out, instinctively flinching back after it passed the threshold, then blinking in amazement at the lack of magical reaction.
“I can- I can le- really leave?”
“I mean that was the whole point of me doing the spell so.. Yeah? C’mon.”
The shell-less suit was too shocked to speak as Starry led them past the archway.
The pair slowly made their way up the winding tunnel, Winston nervously keeping their head on a swivel, as if the counterspell would wear off any moment and trap them again.
As they got to the entry hall of the dungeon, Starry peeked around the corner, just to make sure Timmy was still unconscious. Reassured, she signaled Winston to follow her as she bolted for the spiral ramp to the door.
She skidded to a stop as her shoes brushed the dewy grass outside the dungeon and Winston froze, staring up at the endless blue-purple sky and wispy clouds above in wonder.
Thankfully, since it was so early, not many toons were around, and the dungeon was tucked away from view (it was a pain and a half to find it in the first place, she thought somewhat bitterly to herself). It wouldn't be a good idea to linger too long, but… it probably wouldn't hurt to let Winston experience some Whimsy™ for a few minutes.
The two spent what was probably a good half hour there, as Winston observed the clouds passing by and fluttering butterflies with rapt curiosity. They were so calm as they watched the world around them move, they could’ve almost been mistaken for a statue if not for the occasional twitch or tremor shaking their skeletal frame.
The pair probably would have stayed longer, if Starry hadn’t heard the approaching voices and the crunch of grass under paws. With no time left to think (her plans had ended at getting out of the dungeon anyways), she slapped down her portable hole on the ground, took Winston by the wrist, and jumped in.
Starry didn't breathe a heavy sigh of relief until Winston was inside her estate and the door was firmly shut behind them, lest a particular deer peeped sight of the pair.
Of course, upon entering Winston had frozen in place, gawking at the sight of the night sky that covered the walls.
“Wh-what are th- what are- are those?”
“Hm?” Starry glanced up at where they were pointing. “Oh my glow stickers, they’re shaped like the planets… more or less.” the corners of some of the planets were peeling up, and some of the tinier star stickers had fallen off and had refused to stick on anything again, but she loved them too much to replace them just yet. Not to mention they gave the room such a cozy vibe at night too.
“Pl-planets?”
"Yeah, got em a long time ago so pluto is still included even."
Winston didn't respond to that, but did begin moving finally, awkwardly shuffling further into the main room of the estate.
There was little in Starry's home that wasn't space or night sky themed, it would be nothing if not for a few sparse knick-knacks and things that Rose had given to her over the years. A bookmark made with a pressed nightshade flower, a hand-drawn picture of the two, little things really.
There was also her candy making equipment, of course. While she had certainly tried to get as much of it on-brand as possible, sometimes they just don't make industrial sized stand mixers in galaxy print unfortunately.
“So how- so how mu-much do I o-owe?”
The question caught Starry off guard as she snapped back to attention
“Sorry, what?”
“Wha-what do I owe you- what do I- you for free- freeing me-me?”
She blinked, COGS was really so messed up they would charge someone for being a rescued prisoner of war, wouldn’t they. Well none of that was gonna fly with her here.
She waved her hand dismissively “Don’t even worry about it, it’s uhhh…” what was that term her mom used when a client couldn’t afford to pay but they did the work anyways…
“... pro bono?”
Winston frowned “But- but you- I don’t want to- to impose.”
“Like I said don’t worry about it, I got more space than I know what to do with” Rose would be giggling at her unintentional pun had she been there “You can stay here for however long you wanna like a-”
“A ten- tenant?”
“I was gonna say like a roommate, you don’t gotta pay me anything to stay, got it?”
“O-oh”
The answer seemed to satisfy them as they nodded with a gracious smile, much more sincere than the one they had used when they first met.
The two spent the rest of the afternoon getting Winston settled in, establishing some ground rules, giving Starry her hat back, and signing the roommate agreement contract Winston had insisted on drafted up ‘just in case’.
There was just one thing left to deal with now…
She had to report back to the Ye Olde elders.
“Uh.. good news! I don’t think that skelecog will be an issue, in fact I don’t think they’ll give you any more trouble ever again.”
“That is wonderful news Ms. Nightflight, how on earth did you accomplish such a feat?!”
“Well, let’s just say I gave them what they deserved” The bat gave a wink, the true meaning of which was completely lost on the oblivious elder, who merely smiled at her and said he’d send word to the mayor about her great deed and how she was an outstanding example for all of toonkind and yadda yadda.
The bat allowed herself to zone out, letting the raccoon’s meaningless words wash over her, comfortable in the knowledge that she'd be over at Rose's house in just a few… hours, if this guy didn't shut up soon.
“So yeah that’s what happened” the bat finished with a shrug, accepting the slice of blueberry pie from Rose.
“Wowzers!
... uh, how’re you gonna feed him?” Rose asked with genuine confusion, tilting her head like a puppy.
“...Yee.”
“Sir, we’ve just received a report from conveyancer #19452 that the P.R.R was seen being escorted from the dungeon and into a ‘portable hole’ by a bat toon. Our radar readings are coming up negative to any COGS employees still held captive within the dungeon, so I’m inclined to believe that the prisoner has been transferred to another location and it is possible our mission has been compromised.”
“Forsooth?!” Prester flustered, anger and confusion clouding his eyes for just a moment before his gaze sharpened wickedly, his jaw set in a hard line
“Nay, the foul abominations seek to beguile and mislead us! Our quarry inalterably resides confined in this stockade, and the residents of this foolish settlement are none the wiser to our endeavor. We continue our campaign upon the morrow as usual.” the Witch Hunter proclaimed stubbornly.
No sire, Prester Virgil shant be moved from this tower!
…
Advocate #897324 Sighed and went to write up the report that would officially declare the P.R.R MIA.