Work Text:
“So, we kinda need to work together. It will be hard if you don’t talk to me.”
“Yeah sorry,” some kind of a cute blush crawl on the guy’s cheek. “I was thinking about the topic.”
Henry wasn’t a liar. He never considered himself as one. But now he was obviously lying. His thoughts wasn’t circling around stupid assignment or around political degree. All he was able to think or he was forced to think is those sharp facial features, sunny smile and happiness bursted out of that wonderful person. Henry definitely didn’t has a crush on Alex. It’s just he was charmed by him. But who didn’t? He was too sociable, funny, smart. Charming. Hard to resist.
“Have some ideas?”
“Maybe we could talk about constitutional law of Great Britain?”
“Sure,” Alex laughed lightly and left Henry with the phone number on the piece of paper.
It was surprisingly easy to work with Alex. He was definitely an overachiever so everything was needed to be perfect. Henry wasn’t so passioned for political studies. Actually he could totally say that he hated it. But Alex wasn’t. He was the best. While doing this assignment he showed so much love for this science. It felt like he was at his place, just where he meant to be. Watching it was breathtaking. Henry never wanted to be a politician, he would never be so passionate about it. He has literature. His dark secret that he keeps from the family. The reason why he had run away from London and stayed at New-York hopping no one would go after him.
Despite the obviousness of their differences they talked a lot. Mostly Alex, obviously. After two or three weeks of their work together Henry knew almost everything about his partner’s childhood, relationship with parents and preferences in dog breeds. But it was nice. Their communication was filled with calm and cozy feeling of warmth.
****
“So,” Alex was sitting on a very comfortable couch and trying to open another bottle of beer while Henry was typing something on his laptop, “I couldn’t escape the feeling that books are playing kinda important role in you life since they practically everywhere”.
“Yes, if it was my choice, I would never choose political studies.”
“But it wasn’t?”
“My parents… well let’s say that they’re strict human beings with a desire for control.”
“Shit. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay, I presume. Sometimes it gets a little bit sad knowing that I could learn something interesting for me if I was a little bit more strong and had the nerve to stand for myself, but… it’s okay”.
“Sounds like not…”
“Feels like you crossing the line” the smile however was not accusing but warm.
“Sorry,” Alex smirked.
“It’s okay, but that gives me a permission to cry on your shoulder from time to time” Henry leaned to the coach back and made a sip of the drink watching the smile spreading on Alex’s face.
“I’m down for it,” Henry felt a warm and calming gesture from the hand that landed on his shoulder. “What else are friends for?”
“We’re friends?”
“You don’t think so?”
“I thought we just partners for this project”
“Yes. And I’m asking all of that personal stuff just because I’m a polite person”
It hit Henry just at that moment. He never thought that Alex could be interested in him. That questions about his parents, his life in London, his school and friends - all of them were just a small talk and Alex is a master of a small talks. Why should he care about his problems with parents, his life choices and his escape to the other side of the planet? But the more he thinks about it the more he realizes it was never just the gesture of politeness. It was always more than that. Maybe not every person he met would tell funny stories about childhood and first crush at school and fooling around with a friend. That was the minute he realized that Alex his friend.
“Sorry,” sheepishly chuckled Henry, “indeed I thought that we just parters”
“Okay. Since we’re officially friends,” another bottle was opened, “I suggest celebrate this”
“How?“
“Another beer?“
“You just opened this one. I’m worried about your liver“
“Made of steal,“ carelessly waving his hand Alex smiled so warm that Henry’s heart made a somersault, “Let’s go to a museum?“
“It’s eleven o’clock. Everything’s closed.“
“Shit. Then you tell me something. Something about you beloved literature.“
“I thought you don’t understand a thing when I’m talking about it.“
“Yep. But I really like to watch you speaking about that guy… Wilde and another one… ehr… Byron… and…“
“I got it,“ the warm laugh bursted out of Henry.
Alex hugged a bottle, laid his head on Henry’s shoulder and started to relish velvety drawling story about some poet. Last thing Henry wanted is to disturbing this calm warm and in some way magical evening so approximately at the second sentence he lowered the voice and shuffled it with the pleasant hardly audible sounds of the street - people voices, car engines, bark of dogs and a rustle of bird wings.
***
“An A?“ It seemed that his face made an expression full of surprise by itself.
“Such a surprise? You’ve been working with the best“ Alex’s hand fell at his shoulder in a congratulatory and cheerfully way. “Would you mind a little celebration, babe?“
“You just can’t live without celebrations?“
“What’s the point of such life?“ Henry admired to himself that it’s getting harder and harder to say no to Alex.
They ended up at Henry’s apartment like many times before. Alex in a very usual way put the beer in the fridge and tumbled on a couch handing two unopened bottles. Henry comprehended the meaning of this evenings in his life. It seemed that Alex was perfect in his living room. No matter what he was doing - having problems with coordination and with the bottle cap that refuses to open or being too inspired by the science he was studying - he was natural in this surroundings, in Henry’s home, in Henry’s life. So it wasn’t hard for him to understand that he’s falling in love with Alex. Maybe he’d already fell and smashed himself with those feelings. But he was fine. He thought that he was fine. He was sure that he is fine. Right before the moment when Alex asked him if he coming to the couch. He would be fine when his heart leaved off pounding so fast. And the beer was a great solution.
”Tell me, British guy…” somewhere near end of the second bottle started Alex but wasn’t able to finish.
”British guy? Gosh you that much drunk?” The sincere laugh came out unconsciously.
”How you would like me to call you?” Alex leaned a little bit closer. Too close actually for Henry’s stupid heart start his race all over again. ”Darling? Sweet? Babe?”
”Henry,” somehow it got harder to speak and Henry’s voice decided to abandoned him. ”Just my name will be fine.”
”So tell me, just your name, how that happened that a guy like you avoided relationship? How can you be alone?”
”I think I have unrealistic standards. I want a person with whom I can be fully myself, make some stupid decisions and acting fool, talk a lot about everything even if the topic is completely pointless. And obviously I need to trust this person to act like that. And also I want all that crap from movies like a dance in the moonlight or kiss in the rain. Something like that.”
”You’re such a…”
“Fool?” Henry nervously sipped the beer.
“No,” Alex smirked, “I wanted to say romantic.”
“I think it’s kinda the same thing.”
“Maybe, but once you find the right person it wouldn’t matter.”
“I think I found the right one. But I don’t think that I’m the right for him”
“Why so?”
“Because he’s so different. I’m not sure we share at least one interest”
“But you still think he’s the best for you? What if that person thinks the same way?”
“I doubt that”
“Then ask”
“I’m scared”
“Well here is a tragedy”
“Definitely”
And then the silence hit them. It’s not like he was afraid of rejection. Even more he was afraid of things would be different. Even If Henry okay with that Alex will be the person, who may act different. At least he will be careful. He will be thinking twice before saying something. Or that intimacy and frankness he cared about in their relationship would be gone forever.
But it’s hard to resist that warm smile and those tender touches of support and a complete understanding that he’s got very strong feelings for Alex. It’s hard to resist and it’s terrifying.
”What about you?”
”I have a feeling that I’m a coward as much as you.”
”Sorry, but I don’t believe you. How can you be the one to fear?”
”Usually everyone knows if I’m in love with somebody, but this time it’s kinda different. I don’t know… He is different.”
”Maybe my advise isn’t fresh but have you tried to tell him? Some of us should be brave in order to be happy,” exhausted smile came out at his face.
”You know what?” With the courage that appears every time he talks in the class Alex put the bottle on the table and turned to Henry. ”You right.”
”Really?” Henry was happy for his friend. He was almost hundred procreant sure that he was happy. But there always an exception. And in this case it was some kind of jealousy. Alex would be with someone who is special.With some one who is making out of his always confident friend a frustrated little child that afraid to make a step. Henry would be okay with that. As long as he fought this feelings which had been drowning him from the first time he spoke to Alex.
”Yes. I have this thing about one guy. He’s extremely handsome, as for me, and he’s smart, and he’s making me feel like I’m special and able to do everything. And also I want to fly to space and get a star for him only because it will make him happy and I’ll see his smile. Then he will say something to me in his British accent and I’ll forget how to breathe.”
”Wait a minute… do you mean…” breath in and breath out, voice stupidly become more trembling, ”me?”
“You,” said Alex like it was something obvious, like it was scientific fact, like everyone knew that. Everyone except Henry who was sitting at the couch watching his dreams comes true and not believing it.
“Well then…”
Full understanding of what happened poured out into little smile and a small touch on the hand. And then it bursted out into a kiss. Henry didn’t realize how that happened. He just did it. It was inevitable. Light innocent kiss became more and more passionate like the wall eventually had fallen and Henry was able to do what he was desperately wanted for a long time.
Everything seemed like not enough. Not enough kisses, not enough touches, not enough Alex. Henry wanted to feel every cell of his body. Sitting on the knees, undressing Alex become more important than anything in the world. Lips touched the shoulder, went up to the neck, then cheek, then every spot at the face while hands were on the Alex’s west, shoulder blades, back, counting his ribs.
”We should move to the bedroom,” hardly breathed out Alex and his hands hugged Henry trying to calm him a little bit.
”Don’t you like it here?” Asked Henry biting Alex’s cheekbone.
”I love it here. But I want you in the bedroom where I’ll have a lot of space to do whatever I want.”
Last thing Henry remembered is sheets, burning touches, breathless kisses and endless happiness that warmed inside out.