Chapter Text
“The hospital asked should the body be cast before I say goodbye my star in the sky”
Every night James lay on the front lawn of him and Sirius’ house looking up at the stars and telling them all about his day and how he was doing but he wasn’t talking to all the stars just one in particular, the heart of the lion. Even though the regulus star wasn’t the Brightest in the sky, to james it was the most beautiful thing in the whole world. His star, his regulus was beautiful. Was… that’s hurts. Siris had
Sirius had moved in with james after he decided he didn’t want to stay in the flat that him and Remus shared. And James didn’t want to stay alone in the small secluded house that he and regulus shared. It was in a small part of London in a forest very peaceful and a great view of the stars.
Some days Sirius joined James on the grass talking to the night sky, other times he would come out afterJames or he would climb up to the roof. But he wasn’t talking to the stars he was talking to the moon, his moon, Remus.
Of course sometimes Sirius would talk to his brother and sometimes james would talk to Remus but mostly they talked to their loves
Ever since everything happened Sirius and james haven’t been the same. They don’t talk to each other. I’m the morning james gets up early and makes breakfast for him and Sirius then leaves sirius’ in the fridge with a note. After that james usually goes out for a walk or to go to regulus’ favourite bookstore and cafe. He spends a lot of time there that the people that work there know to make his order before he even gets there every morning. He usually just sits and reads some books that regulus liked that he asked James to read but he never did, until now. But every once in a while when someone else there a worker or customer starts a conversation he’ll talk all about his star and tell them how he was the brightest star in James potters universe. It’s been two months since they died and that night james didn’t even realize where he was going. He just stood up and eventually found himself at Sirius’ bedroom door. He hesitated for a moment before he knocked and opened the door. Sirius was sitting in his bed under the blankets leaning against the headboard. “Pads” James said almost whisper like with a sad smile “Oh prongs” sirius replied with the same tone and sad smile He saw a tear rundown sirius cheek, and that was all James needed before I he found himself rushing to the bed and practically throwing himself at sirius grabbing him and pulling him close wrapping their arms together. He sat there and held sirius as he cried. Finally after about half an hour Sirius said something. “You don’t have to do that you know” “What do you mean pads” “Pretend you’re ok for me, I know you never did with him so please don’t with me. I want to be there for you just as much as you are for me James. We both lost both of them. Neither of us have more hurt then the other ok, so don’t give me that bullshit. Just let me help you, let’s help each other” He was right. James never hid how he was feeling with reg. Not once. After that last word there was about two seconds before James broke down crying He huddled into Sirius’ arms and curled up into a ball while Sirius held him. “He’s gone pads, he’s really gone they both are and I- I don’t know what to do anymore” James said shakily although it was hard to understand because of how hard he was crying “I know, I know” Sirius said, James could tell he had started crying again too So they laid there crying together and holding each other until they both fell asleep This is good, James liked the fact that he now knows that they can get through this together rather than apart. But it still won’t be easy. That night James wasn’t able to go out to talk to his star. So he woke up really early in hopes that he would still be able to see it. Lo and behold when James went outside and laid on the grass and looked up in the sky there it was, the only star still visible. His star. His light. His regulus.