Work Text:
Stuck on You
When the first bomb went off Lieutenant Commander Steve McGarrett knew it was going to be a long day. Clean up wasn’t his sort of thing, no not Steve, he was either the one causing the explosion or far enough away that it didn’t matter. Today was different though, his team was helping evacuate the civilians and try to stop the rebels from leveling the entire town. Steve was annoyed that this was where his time was to be wasted for the next few days. It wasn’t that he didn’t value human life, he understood the concept, but he was a SEAL for crying out loud! He wasn’t trained to comfort a crying mother or carry war-wounded children from the wreckage of their homes. He had specifically chosen to become a SEAL because it kept him far away from all the emotional turmoil of war. He was supposed to be leading his team in covert operations and assassinating enemy leaders, but instead he was here helping families. He knew the people that lived in the town appreciated what they were doing, it was written all over their faces as they fled. One old lady had even given Steve a strange green stone and mumbled something to him in one of the few languages he didn’t know. Steve had graciously accepted the gift with a broad smile and with the full intention of chucking it out the window during his next humvee ride.
“I swear if your life isn’t in immediate danger you aren’t happy.” Nick Taylor walked over to his Commander, a small smile on his face.
“Is it bad if I’m bored?” Steve asked returning the smile as the two surveyed the small, and now destroyed, town.
“Bored? Are you telling me saving civilian lives isn’t keeping you on the edge of your seat?” Nick asked in mock surprise.
Steve chuckled quietly, “If I wanted to evacuate people and help them pack up their stuff all day I could have been a cop. Come on Bullfrog, don’t tell me you are actually enjoying this?” Steve asked traces of boredom evident in his voice.
Nick shifted the rifle in his grip. “No, Sir I wouldn’t say I enjoy this but it’s a hell of a lot easier than what we were doing.” He shrugged and walked a few paces off turning to make one final comment to Steve when all the color drained from his face.
Later Steve would wonder how everything happened so quickly, but at the moment Nick turned around a grenade was thrown into the building Steve was leaning against. As Nick yelled to his friend it was already to late and the building collapsed around him.
When Steve woke he was instantly aware that he was being jostled in the worst possible way and (more importantly) did not have any of his weapons. Actually, when he really began to take stock of the situation….he wasn’t wearing any clothes either!! Panic threatened to drown him, but Steve held on to the rational part of his brain, he was a SEAL damn it he could take out anybody naked or clothed. Steve began to feel around to see if there was anything he could use as a weapon but all he could feel was cloth, which was very strange. A light at the top of his cloth prison had Steve up and ready to attack whatever descended. His resolve shattered into a million pieces however when a hand reached down and plucked him out of what turned out to be a pocket.
“There’s no way this is happening.” Steve thought to himself as the hand placed him into the skirt of a slightly familiar old woman.
The woman smiled and the already wrinkled face turned into a prune with teeth. Steve winced and tried to focus on a way to escape.
“I told you American, rock keep you safe!” The woman cackled gleefully.
Steve looked at the woman and opened his mouth the beginning syllables of a very impolite phrase making its way out of his mouth in the form of “Ribbit!”
The old woman cackled again before patting his head with her index finger. “You was a seal now you a frog silly American!” The words she spoke felt like a surreal death sentence to Steve as he adjusted his dark green legs underneath him. “Don’t worry you alive and now can go back home.” The woman had stood and was holding Steve in her hand as she walked across the ground.
Steve turned and saw Nick sitting on a rock with a satellite phone in his hand talking to someone with a depressed look on his face. It looked as if someone had just told him his best friend had died……Steve grabbed the old woman’s thumb and she merely smiled down at him. Steve shook his arms violently in the air trying to get the woman’s attention. Nick had to know he was still alive!
“I know Sir, I’m very sorry. The Commander was the greatest man I’ve ever met, his family will take it hard when they hear what happened. Not even a body for them to bury.” Nick was clearly torn up as he tried to keep his voice steady on the phone.
The old woman cradled Steve carefully in her hand as she leaned over Nick’s pack. Her hand tilted and Steve fell straight into Nick’s open pack as she said, “it will be alright”.
Nick was immediately transferred stateside to tell Steve’s father personally as a sign of respect to all Steve had accomplished. Steve was there for the whole thing. The bouncy humvee ride, then the eternity of a flight to Hawaii, and with a final quick hop he was safely in the bushes outside his home watching as Nick told his father he was dead. His father was surprisingly distraught at the news. Steve was shocked when his father broke down into tears after Nick left and even called Mary to tell her the sad news. Steve hadn’t realized how much his father had actually loved him until that moment.
He attended his own funeral by hiding in one of the many plants sent by the Navy and observed everything quietly. He was impressed with the large turnout and even some of the old friends he never spoke to who came. Mary was there, eyes red and sniffling through the entire service. She spoke to their father though and if nothing else came from this then Steve guessed at least the two of them reconnecting was a worthy result.
For the next few weeks Steve had took up residence at his father’s house, monitoring the people and events that continued to progress. Being a frog was just as horrible as Steve had never imagined. He was reduced to hopping everywhere and had the annoying habit of eating every insect that flew by. He wished the old woman had told him how to break the damn spell or whatever she had done to him. Steve hadn’t explored Hawaii, it was too dangerous to go very far as a frog and he somehow got the feeling that staying nearby would be better in the long run.
Steve was unfortunately right.
Three weeks after his funeral Steve hopped into the house and into a pool of his father’s blood. Victor Hesse was the only person around and didn’t give a second glance to the dark green frog on the living room floor. It was at that point that Steve really felt the need to change back. He should have been there to protect his father instead of out looking for bugs. He should have stayed to identify if there had been anyone else in the house besides Hesse. Steve was furious with himself for failing his father and the guilt slowly ate away at him. In Steve’s mind, if he had been human he could have prevented his father’s death, but instead he was a frog and was completely useless to everyone, and could only try the best he could to tell people what had happened.
Once again reduced to hiding in house plants, Steve observed the local police activity. His military mind was furious at how lax the local officers’ behavior towards the case was. They paraded around the crime scene contaminating evidence and overlooking obvious clues. By the time Jack McGarrett’s body was buried the case was as cold as his corpse.
Steve was furious and helpless, his mind going a million miles a second to develop some kind of plan! He was sitting on top of his father’s toolbox thinking when the haole cop showed up. Steve immediately wished he was a poisonous frog. True he didn’t know anything about the short blond currently pacing around his father’s garage, but it was incredibly doubtful that he was going to put any more effort into the case than the HPD had. Steve sat silently as the man walked around talking on his cell phone.
“This is Detective Daniel Williams, yes I am at the McGarrett residence, I was wondering if we got the results back on the shoe print I called in yesterday? Alright well let me know what you find out.” Danny ended the call and sighed heavily. Danny couldn’t help thinking that the whole situation was such a lousy way to go for a father who had just lost his only son. He shook his head in thought as he walked over to the other side of the garage flipping through the case file. He stopped in front of the workbench as something new in the file caught his eye. Danny flipped the page and glanced up to be met with the intense gaze of a small green frog. Danny wasn’t superstitious, religious, or paranoid but he knew in an instant that this frog was not normal. (Later he would convince himself it was his policeman’s gut.) Danny closed the case file and set it down next to the toolbox the frog was sitting on to investigate this frog more thoroughly.
“Why aren’t you outside with all the other frogs?” Danny asked bending down to be eye level with the amphibian. “Why are you perched on top of a dead guy’s tool box, huh?” Steve blinked at Danny who obviously would not give up without answers. “Is it a Hawaiian frog thing? Going to dead people’s houses? Wouldn’t surprise me, this entire place is fucked up. I mean they put pineapple on their pizza for crying out loud. I mean how crazy is that! We never would have ruined a pizza like that in Jersey, never!” Danny paused noting the unimpressed gaze of the frog. “Right, now I’m talking to a frog…man I gotta get off this island.” He shook his head in an effort to clear it and moved to get the case file when suddenly the little frog jumped on top of it. Now Danny wasn’t frightened in the least by a creature that could fit in his palm, but that didn’t stop him from letting out a rather girlish shriek of surprise. The frog remained unfazed as it opened the folder on the workbench and slickly spread the sheets out.
Danny’s hands went to his hair, which he reflexively smoothed as he let out a harsh exhale of disbelief, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. “This isn’t happening. Nope, that frog is definitely NOT going through that case file.” Danny reassured himself only to open his eyes and find the small frog turning the page. “Oh this never happens in Jersey.” Danny moaned leaning over the frog to see what he was reading.
Steve didn’t pause in his perusal of the file as the haole apparently had a breakdown. He didn’t care. He needed to see where they were on his father’s case. The blond man’s face was suddenly right next to him and Steve had to fight his new survival instincts in order to continue reading.
“What exactly are you looking for?” Danny asked only to receive a dirty look from the frog. Danny raised his hands in a placating manner and looked affronted. “I’m so sorry for invading your privacy Mr. Frog but my name is Detective Danny Williams and you are making my case file sticky.”
Steve wanted to tell the haole to go jump in the ocean because this was his FATHER which made it HIS case. And, on a side note, he was not making the case sticky if anything it was just going to be a little moist when he got it back. Steve was halfway through the last page when he felt his world moving and hopped off the file and back onto the toolbox. Steve watched in quiet fury as Danny brushed the papers off and closed the file before looking down at him (another huge issue to Steve was the fact that he no longer had his impressive height advantage instead he felt like a….well a frog).
“As I was saying Mr. Frog, you are impeding a police investigation. You have no right to see this file, let alone read it!” Danny stopped mid-rant as he realized he was once again talking to a frog. He pinched the bridge of his nose to try to ward off the headache that was quickly approaching. “Listen, why don’t you go eat some flies and leave me alone, okay?” He looked down to find the word STEVE in the dust surrounding the toolbox and the frog sitting quietly beside it. Danny’s mind was racing, Steve? The only Steve he knew of was the deceased’s equally deceased son…who was dead and buried in the ground. Oh this was not a good day for Danny.
Danny took a step back and folded his arms over his chest and fixed the frog with the look all teenage daughters recognize as the fatherly stare of ‘lie to me and you will never see the light of day again’. “Did you just write the name Steve in the dust?”
The frog nodded it’s head yes and Danny nearly fainted (and would have if fainting was an acceptable Williams practice, which it was not!) “Okay, so you can understand what I’m saying?” A nod. “Why did you write the name Steve in the dust?” The frog indicated the name and then placed one webbed foot on it’s own chest. “You are Steve…….. Wait, YOU are STEVE??” Danny exclaimed and the frog calmly nodded again.
Danny paced around the garage before returning to the toolbox. “Okay you are the same Steve whose body they couldn’t find?” A nod. “Let me guess you don’t know how to be human again?” A nod. “Look Steve, if that really is your name, you aren’t really helping yourself here okay so throw me some hints or something!” The frog paused as if contemplating Danny’s words before drawing in the dust.
“You might want to take it easy there Steve, you only have so much dust to work with no need to write an essay.” Danny tried to make the comment sound serious but the pause and dirty look the frog gave him was a pretty clear indicator he had failed.
Steve knew he needed to be as close to the investigation as possible and if that meant getting close to the spitfire haole well….he had certainly endured worse.
A few seconds later the frog hopped off to the side allowing Danny to read the words he had written. Danny read the words and reread them as his head began shaking no over and over. In the dust were the words “Take me home with you.”
“You don’t understand, I don’t even bring women I meet at the bar home with me why, please explain to me, why the hell I would take a frog who can read and write and thinks he is a human home?!” Danny’s face was a lovely shade of red and the thought briefly flitted through Steve’s mind that Danny looked hot when he was angry before he focused on his goal again.
Danny checked the time on his cell phone as the frog began his dust drawings again and sighed, he would need to pick up Grace soon and how was he going to explain the frog? The frog made a ribbit and Danny turned to see what he had written this time and felt his tender heart melt; “I need you to protect me, please.” Danny tried to be hard to approach, he worked to make it difficult for people, especially new people, to get under his skin and close to him but this…this little frog who was so defenseless was pleading with him and he even used correct punctuation, no minor detail spared!
Danny let out a slow exhale and swallowed his heart back down to where it would be less vulnerable and nodded. “If we do this, there will be rules.”
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Steve watched out of the chest pocket of Danny’s shirt as a small child screamed “Danno” and ran towards them. Steve had never been good with kids, never really cared to try, but the way Danny scooped her up into the air and held her close made Steve realize there was definitely something he was missing. Danny talked enthusiastically to Grace as she got into the car and Steve felt contact high from the happiness that was rolling off of Danny in waves.
“Danno, why do you have a frog in your pocket?” Grace asked innocently as Steve quickly ducked out of sight but it was to late, he had been caught watching the addicting father-daughter relationship.
Danny took a deep breath to calm himself before he explained. “Well Gracie, Mr. Frog here needs a home for a while and I though he could keep me company at my apartment.” Danny nearly patted himself on the back for the flawless explanation.
“Won’t he die?” Grace’s blunt question had Danny hitting the brakes before he rear-ended the truck in front of them.
“What!?” Danny could feel the frog laughing in his pocket and resisted the urge to dump the creature out on the street.
“Mommy says your apartment won’t sustain life for very long.” Grace smiled at Steve as his head popped out into view again. “Can I hold him?”
“No, no you cannot hold Mr. Frog.” Danny pushed Steve back down in frustration and turned to look at his daughter again. “Your mother said that?”
“It’s not important Danno, I love staying with you wherever you are!” Grace’s smile outshone the sun and even Steve at this point was willing to give her whatever she wanted.
“Fine, here, hold Mr. Frog.” Danny dumped Steve out of his pocket and into Grace’s hand.
Steve wanted to explain to Danny that he knew what his name was, but to Steve’s great annoyance (and surprise judging by the apartment comment) the car was clear of all dust. His bad mood was quickly derailed however when Grace ran a careful finger over his head in a modified petting motion.
The drive was short and everyone quickly got out of the car, Grace holding Steve securely in her hands as they walked toward the apartment. Steve, even as a frog, had standards and one look at Danny’s apartment had him trying to jump ship. Grace had a very firm hold on him unfortunately and his attempted escape was futile. Once inside the apartment Steve’s initial feelings only magnified. Seriously, who could live in this place?!
Grace set Steve on the fold out couch and rushed over to the TV. Danny set the case file down by the coffee pot and Steve began calculating the distance between where he was and where he wanted to be. He didn’t get long though as Grace ran back to him and showed him two DVD cases.
“Which one do you want to watch Mr. Frog? Snow White or The Princess and the Frog?” Grace asked seemingly genuinely curious of his preference for Disney movies. Danny looked up from the file and glared at Steve, apparently Steve was suppose to act like a normal frog. Steve let out a weak ribbit and Grace giggled adorably. “I thought you would want to watch The Princess and the Frog!”
The evening progressed slowly with take out Chinese ordered and Grace watching movies on Danny’s lap while he lovingly brushed her hair out of the braid it had been trapped in all day. After the first DVD Steve found himself drawn to the actions of Danny’s hands instead of the movie. The way they worked so quickly and gently through Grace’s hair had Steve wondering what it would feel like to have those hands touching his own body. The click of the DVD player had Steve snapping back to reality and watching curiously as Danny went and tucked Grace into bed. Steve felt guilty for the extra pressure he was no doubt putting the detective under. It was clear he was divorced, obviously got the short end of the stick if the apartment was anything to go by and he was a haole cop with everyone reminding him of that fact probably every day. Steve gave a small sigh as his eyes drifted around the room. If only he could be human again, then he could do something to help Danny, repay his kindness and give him a good life instead of whatever stressful version he was currently settling for. If only there was some way…Steve’s eyes fell on the case of “The Princess and the Frog” and it clicked.
Danny tiredly stumbled back into the living room, if you could even call it that, and rubbed a hand over his face. Everyday it got harder and harder to live here. He barely got to see Grace and even when he did what did he really have to offer her? He loved his daughter more than his life but at the end of the day Danny’s existence was worse than miserable. The whole Steve/Frog situation didn’t help either. Grace hadn’t wanted to go to sleep after watching so many fairytales. Danny was determined to throw out “The Princess and the Frog” since Gracie had pleaded with him to kiss Mr. Frog so he would turn back into a…..wait a minute. Danny’s eyes snapped open as he looked around the room, where was the frog?
“Steve?” Danny whispered looking under the pullout bed. The resounding ribbit from the entertainment center had Danny hitting his head underneath the bed in surprise. Danny stood rubbing the spot that would undoubtedly bruise and glared at the frog sitting on top of the TV. “Where did you disappear to?” Danny asked not really expecting an answer.
Steve hopped off the TV and onto the DVD case. Danny walked over and tilted his head to look at the case and then back at Steve. “Let me guess, Disney has rotted your brain?” Steve didn’t think the joke was funny and slapped his webbed foot down on the title again. “Okay, okay, obviously someone has no sense of humor. The Princess and the Frog? We just watched that, babe, why would you want to see it again?” Danny figured Steve wanted him to guess since he wasn’t exactly providing multiple choice options. “Look, I know this is going to sound silly,” Danny started kneeling on his good knee so he could look at Steve eye to eye. “Grace thinks if I kiss you, you will turn back into a human. I mean she doesn’t know what happened to you, she thinks just because you’re a frog I should give it a go so….what do you think?” Danny asked slowly.
Steve saw the blush rise to Danny’s cheeks and felt his heart beat faster as Danny explained his idea. Steve had come to the same conclusion but how Danny said it had him feeling like a teenager all over again. Steve nodded his head and the blush staining Danny’s cheeks turned a dark shade of crimson.
“Okay, babe, here it goes.” Danny said slowly standing as Steve hopped into his hand.
Danny had never kissed a frog before but he had watched enough movies to understand the general idea. So with a deep breath he closed his eyes and kissed the frog. In that instant Steve shifted back to his human self and threw himself into the kiss. Danny was surprised by how warm and soft the lips were that pressed against his and could feel himself falling deeper into the kiss, deeper than he had ever been with Rachel and that was when he opened his eyes…and looked up.
A slight frown marred Danny’s features as he looked up at Steve. “I think I liked you better when you weren’t twice my height.”
Steve felt like his entire world was on fire and gave Danny his best ‘come get me’ grin before leaning in and doing the most spontaneous thing in his life by sealing his lips firmly to Danny’s. The kiss was powerful and passionate and when they parted Steve felt like he had lost a very important part of himself. He smiled and looked at Danny, or rather where Danny should have been. Looking down Steve’s eyes widened as he saw a tiny green frog standing on top of Danny’s tie. Steve knelt down to where Danny was sitting with his webbed hands over his eyes.
“Danny, I’m so sorry.” Steve apologized his voice rough from disuse. “I didn’t mean to turn you into a frog I don’t even know how it happened.” Steve stopped as he realized he was rambling and Danny still had not removed his webbed hands from his eyes. “Danny, what is it?” Steve asked suddenly worried that Danny had become blind or something equally awful.
Danny carefully removed one webbed hand and made a wild gesture towards Steve. Steve’s face contorted in confusion and Danny gestured to Steve then to Danny’s clothes and it clicked. “Oh, I’m sorry man I’ll go put some pants on I wouldn’t want to offend your amphibian sensibilities.” Steve said with a chuckle and smirk that could easily be described as flirtatious as he walked back to find where Danny kept his clothes.
Danny merely shook his head in disbelief, had he said his life was worse than miserable? He meant a living hell.