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Moments like this reminded you of why.
It felt like you were watching from a front row seat, eyes mesmerized by the sight before you, a small grin on your face, unable to look away. Your whole world; every small bit of it that made getting up worth it, that made the fight to survive just a bit more tolerable, that made all the bad seem like nothing compared to all the good .
Your whole world; no matter how chaotic it is.
Others would look in and find it strange, but you didn’t care. It was strange. All of you, together, like this; it was weird and it was strange and nothing about it was normal but you wouldn’t trade it for a single thing in this whole world. What was the point of normal if you lost all that you loved so dearly?
Because even as Gojo and Megumi are fighting, like they always are, Megumi’s face pinched up into an expression of frustration as Gojo purposefully eggs him on. And Tsumiki stands on the sidelines trying to calm her brother down, a nervous smile on her face. But still, on each of their faces, you can see the twinkle of warmth, of love in their eyes. They’re fighting, sure, and Tsumiki looks like she might pass out from the stress of it all, but there’s no mirth in any of their actions
Geto stands on the sides with the twins, kneeled down to their height, ruffling their hair as they excitedly tell him about their day at school yesterday. Geto was better with the kids in the way he listened, in the way he was patient and never rushed them, but Gojo was better at bringing their energy up, about getting them to still try even when they’d given up. These two men had given these kids the life they never would’ve had otherwise, and in turn, had invited you to be a part of it.
You could sit and watch them forever.
Watch with that big grin that’s curling onto your lips as Tsumiki eventually turns to Geto for help, and the man obliges with ease as he kicks Gojo in the shin, scolding him for riling up Megumi as the young boy nods up at him in agreement. The twins flank around Megumi, even as he shies from their excitement, you know he tries as he nods as them, and Tsumiki ruffles his hair in the way only she’s ever allowed to.
Gojo’s pouting at Geto but he’s laughing as he does, and the two are speaking to each other with such warmth and love that it fills you with a comfort that only they can achieve in you.
So, yeah, they were your whole world. This misfit group of people that had all been brought together through unfortunate circumstances, but that in turn had only made all of you closer; bonded in a way no one else would ever understand.
Because Gojo was your sun, and Geto was your moon, and the kids were the stars in your life, and even if sometimes you felt you maybe didn’t fit in, you were content with at least watching. With at least being able to be a part of it, anyway you could. From the sides, watching in, stepping in when they needed, even if that felt rare.
After all, they were your whole world.
“Whatcha thinking about, pretty?”
You blink and there’s a shadow leaning over you, your head pulling back to meet Gojo’s gaze through the black of his blindfold. There’s a soft grin on his face as he glances down at you, hands shoved into his pockets, and Geto is standing just slightly behind him, smiling at you as well, but with a hint of concern, as if the both of you could sense your thoughts. They'd always been good at that, sensing when things were wrong or even just a little off–sometimes it felt like they were able to tell before you even knew yourself. Always so consciously aware of you and what's going on inside your head, their eyes on you when you weren't aware. Watching, caring, being there for when you needed them to be.
In ways it felt like you could never quite measure up to.
But your smile doesn’t fade, and as you let your eyes quickly flicker to the kids, smile brightening as you watch the four of them chat amongst themselves, before turning back to Geto and Gojo, you just shrug. “Mmm,” you hum lightly, swinging your feet from the bench you’d been sitting on, “nothing much.”
“Uh huh,” Gojo nods in the way that tells you he doesn’t believe you one bit. He’s taking the empty seat next to you in the next second, pressing himself against your side as Geto steps closer, reaching to brush a stray piece of hair behind your ears. “You’ve got your thinking face on, babe.”
“Tell us,” Geto offers softly, following Gojo's stride with ease, meeting your eyes with care. “You can trust us.”
You shake your head; “I know.” And at their unconvinced looks, you roll your eyes, chuckling softly. “I do. Of course I do. I... I was just thinking about the kids and you two.”
“Oh?” Gojo quirks a brow, resting his arm around your shoulders, pulling you against him with a smirk.
Geto shuffles on his feet. “What about?” He asks.
You brush them off; “it’s silly.”
Geto shakes his head, kneeling so he’s at your eye level, arms stretched out on his knees as his fingers reach for the hem of your skirt, touching you in such a mindless, simply way but it brings about a flood of reassurance through you still. He shares a look with Gojo, before focusing on you once again; “no, it isn’t,” he denies with ease. “Not when it comes to you.”
“Nothing is silly when it comes to you,” Gojo adds, smirk faltering, and the way he says it leaves no room for argument.
Biting your lip, you glance to your lap, moving your hands there to clasp them as you inhale sharply. “I love you all so much,” you find yourself whispering, trying to express the emotions swirling through your mind in a way that makes sense. You were often overwhelmed with the way you felt towards Geto, Gojo and the kids, even through the bad moments, there was such love for them in your heart. It just wasn’t always easy to express that. It was easy to express this weight that came with that love, a weight that weighed down on you with such heavy worry that you weren't doing as much for them as they were for you.
“And you both are so good with the kids,” you express, turning to meet each of their gazes. “Even when Satoru teases Megumi, or Suguru’s too easy on the girls… you saved them in ways no one else could’ve and I know all of them adore you so much.” Reaching forward, you take each of their hands in your own, squeezing tightly, ignoring the shocked look on their faces as you pour your heart out.
“You’re all my whole world.”
There’s a pause. Geto and Gojo look at each other, trying to find the words to say. They don't fail to notice the lack of you in your words, how you seem to specifically single yourself out as if you're not as much of an integral part of these family... and of course it’s Geto who speaks first because he’s always been better at saying the right thing in the ways that Gojo means but can't always express well. But Gojo doesn't mind letting Geto do the talking for him if it'll mean you'll understand just how much you truly are loved.
Shifting, Geto moves, grasping your chin gently to pull your gaze on him as he smiles at you. “We love you too.” Then, the smile falters slightly as he frowns; “you know that, right?”
Your lips part, but no words leave your mouth. You want to say yes, because realistically, you know they do–but the words hesitate, get choked in the back of your throat and you find yourself wondering. Geto and Gojo have done nothing to ever convince you otherwise, and you feel guilty that you can't express that; because there's this sinking feeling in your chest that purely stems from your own anxiety.
Geto frowns, and then Gojo is suddenly in front of you, face so oddly serious in a way you rarely see from him. Geto's better with words, but Gojo can express them when he wants, and when it comes to you, he wants to make absolutely sure you understand. “We do,” he assures, not an ounce of doubt as the two surround you, not allowing you to pull away or focus on anything but them. “ You’re our whole world. The kids too.”
“We never would’ve managed any of this without you,” Geto tells you, flipping his hand so he’s now grasping yours. Holding tightly, he threads his fingers through yours, squeezing. “Who knows what would’ve happened if Satoru and I didn’t have you.”
Lips parting, you stare at him, then Gojo, thoroughly shocked by the sincerity of their words. It wasn’t like you doubted their feelings for you–you knew they loved you. You just questioned how much, sometimes… or rather, if anything would be different if you weren’t there. Without Geto, those girls never would’ve been saved, and without Gojo, Megumi would’ve been sold off to the Zen’in clan and who knows what would’ve happened to Tsumiki. Without each other, Geto and Gojo might've gone down very different paths then the one they were on now... but without you, would anything have changed?
“Who knows what I would’ve done if you hadn’t answered my call that night.”
Gasping, you turn to Geto, wide eyes falling on you as he frowns at you.
That night–the night he found the girls and nearly lost it all. He'd been in a dark place for so long before that you'd constantly been worried about him. When he'd called you that night, you'd feared the worst; but the relief that had flooded you when you realized he thought to call you first... it had been unpalatable.
You… you never knew he thought that the same when it came to that night–
“And God knows I’m not responsible enough to raise two kids by myself.”
It’s such a stark difference from Geto’s profession that it pulls a startled laugh from you, eyes falling on Gojo who’s staring blankly back at you, before the startled laughter turns into a giggle and you can’t control yourself anymore. The tears that had been welling in your eyes start to fall, but because of joy as your stomach starts to hurt from laughter, shaking your head at Gojo. Your face lights up with his words, a hand falling to your stomach as you bite your lip to try and stifle your own laughter.
Both boys smile adoringly at you.
“There’s our girl,” Gojo grins down at you, hand brushing across your waist as he bumps into your side lightly.
“Missed your smile,” Geto hums lightly, nodding along with Gojo. “I don't like seeing you sad.”
Flushing, you bite your lip, feeling flutters flood through your stomach as your laughter fades and you hide your blush. Gojo just pulls you into his side in response and Geto is clasping your chin in his hands once more, pulling your face up and not allowing you to hide.
“We meant it, okay?” He reminds.
Gojo squeezes you for emphasis; “every word.”
You smile, bright, genuine, happiness flooding through your entire being as your lips part to say something before you’re suddenly flanked by a body.
“Why does Y/N/N look sad!”
It’s Nanako who asks the question, throwing her arms around your waist as Mimiko follows suit, both girls stunning you as Gojo is forced to pull back in response. Your hands hover by your sides as you glance down at them, before your gaze falls on Tsumiki who stands next to Geto with a worried expression and Megumi in front of you with a concerned expression of his own, brows pinched together as he silently asks you what’s wrong.
“Are you alright, Y/N-san?” Tsumiki asks, head tilting.
The girls arms around your waist squeeze tighter and they’re glancing up at you through their lashes, waiting for your response.
“Was Gojo mean to you?” Megumi asks flatly, sending the white-haired man a nasty glare.
“Wha–?” Gojo gasps, thoroughly offended as he turns to face the boy. Geto cackles loudly in response.
“I’ll beat him up if he was,” Megumi adds, and you turn to him with a barely concealed smile as you see that despite his words, he genuinely is troubled for you.
Just as Gojo looks ready to strangle the boy (though, we know he’d never actually ), you speak up; “no, Satoru wasn’t mean to me.” Then, leaning back, you set your hands on the girls' backs, soothing them. “And I’m sorry for worrying you kids. I was just feeling… sad for a moment. But I feel better now.”
“And that's because of us,” Gojo cuts in, sticking his tongue out at Megumi as he gestures to Geto and him.
“Satoru,” Geto sighs, “do try and act your age.”
“ Suguru !”
You just roll your eyes, focusing on the kids; “how about we get some ice cream, huh? A little treat.”
The girls practically squeal in excitement, the twins pulling away from you to grasp onto Tsumiki tightly as they all nod eagerly. You laugh at their excitement, turning to Megumi who, in turn, offers a small nod and smile of his eyes, eyes flickering to yours once more, a little more perceptive than the rest–just like he’s always been–and then when he’s sure you really are okay, he eases, stepping back with his sister and step-sisters.
“Perfect,” you clap your hands together, moving to stand. “It’ll be Satoru’s treat!”
“Hey!” Gojo calls, standing up next to you as Geto moves to a stand as well on the other side of you. “It’s always my treat.”
“That’s because you’re rich,” you remind, and he really doesn’t have an argument against that.
The kids run off ahead, and you move to follow, before you’re pulled back by a set of arms, spinning you as Geto and Gojo each place a respective kiss against your cheeks. Your face turns tomato red in response, thrown off by the innocent affection, but as they pull back, they’re grinning widely with the softest eyes you’ve ever seen on them and you can’t deny, in that moment, just how loved you feel.
Because you were their world just as much as they were yours.