Work Text:
November, 1983
Nancy Wheeler had never expected her life would come to this. Sitting in the gym of Hawkins Middle School around a plastic kiddie pool was far from how she had imagined her spending her free time. But as she found herself inching closer to Johnathan Byers’ side, Nancy knew they were all at a point of no return.
This was their last chance.
As Nancy watched Eleven slip the duct-taped covered goggles over her eyes, she couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming rush of pity. Eleven was just a child. Nancy wasn’t sure how the young girl came to have her powers, but something told her that didn’t happen without human intervention.
She had a sneaking suspicion that whoever was responsible for the monster escaping, was also responsible for Eleven’s strange abilities.
Joyce and Hopper took Eleven by the hands, helping her gently into the water. She took a deep breath, as if gathering her nerves, and sank down to her knees. Her pink dress floated around her as she laid on her back, the rest of her body rising with it.
Nancy felt a steady pressure constricting her stomach as if she were about to throw up. Anything could happen, and Nancy was torn between all the things she wanted. She wanted Barb back. More than anything she wanted Barb back. But she didn’t want Eleven to suffer, either. There was also Will to think about.
Nancy bit her lip as hard as possible, doing anything to keep herself from screaming. Why should she have to choose? No one was forcing her, but Nancy felt as if she was the judge, jury, and executioner.
She was startled out of her thoughts by the electricity flickering above them. Everyone looked up, their faces frozen in anxiety. The gym lights blinked on and off, causing Nancy to shiver with dread.
It was starting.
For the longest time, nothing happened. Eleven didn’t move or speak, and even the lights were still. Nancy could see her own fear reflected in everyone else’s eyes. They all had that niggling doubt in the back of their minds, the terror that came with not knowing if the plan would work.
But no one spoke. No one dared break the silence. If they interrupted-
“Barbra?”
Nancy couldn’t help but latch desperately onto the side of the pool, not taking her eyes off Eleven. This at least meant that she had made it to the Upside Down, that their homemade sensory deprivation tank worked. Now they could find Barb and Will. She had already rehearsed her apologies in her head.
I’m sorry I left you behind.
I’m sorry I gave you up.
I’m sorry I hurt you.
I love-
The lights flickered violently. Eleven’s breath quickened.
Nancy looked around frantically. “What’s happening?”
Mike shook his head. “I don’t know.”
She felt her heart stuttering in her chest, the anxiety of the situation snatching her ability to breathe. Nancy didn’t realize she was speaking until she heard how panicked her voice sounded.
“Is Barb okay? Is she okay?”
Eleven was crying, small whimpers breaking through her sharp breaths. She was shaking, terrified. “Gone. Gone.”
Nancy clasped her hand over her mouth, feeling bile rise up in her throat. She vaguely heard Joyce soothing Eleven in the background, but Nancy found herself tuning everything out except for Eleven’s screams.
“Gone!”
“Gone!”
Nancy couldn’t help it. She ran.
She stumbled out of the gym, not caring if anyone followed her and not paying attention to where she was going. She couldn’t breathe, acid choking her airways. Nancy at least had the wherewithal to find a trash can, vomiting her entire stomach into the bottom.
This was no one’s fault but her own.
If she hadn’t been so determined to be someone else, if she wasn’t so afraid of who she was, this never would have happened to Barb. She would still be here. She could have been happy, safe. The thought made Nancy throw up again, her sobs mixing with her coughing.
Nancy Wheeler killed her best friend.
She killed the girl she loved.
Nancy didn’t deserve to come back from this, and she didn’t want to. She would never know how badly Barb suffered, never know that pain. But she would spend the rest of her life making sure that she would never let this happen again.
Even if it meant giving up everything.
When she was sure she was finished emptying her stomach, she slid down the back of the wall, unable to catch her breath. Nancy knew she should go back in soon. She was going to save Will, and nothing would stop her. She wasn’t going to lose anyone else if she could do something about it.
Nancy just needed a minute to mourn the end of everything that had once held meaning to her.
She heard the door to the gym open and close with a slam. It didn’t take much imagination for her to realize who it was. Nancy felt, more than saw, him sit next to her, his knees up to his chest as well. She didn’t bother to stop her tears, but wouldn’t let them control her.
“We have to go back to the station.”
Johnathan looked at her like she was crazy. “What?”
Nancy had heard at least somewhat of the conversation going on in the gym. “Your mom and Hopper are just walking in there like bait. That thing is still in there. And we can’t just sit here and let it get them, too. We can’t.”
He didn’t say anything. Nancy didn’t know if she wanted him to talk or not. Even if Johnathan didn’t go, she’d go without him. No matter what.
Johnathan sighed. “You still wanna try it out?”
She felt fury towards the monster rise up within her. “I want to finish what we started. I want to kill it.”
He looked at her, and Nancy was once again reminded of how hard Johnathan could be to read. But he didn’t say no. Instead, he nodded. “Okay.”
As they walked out to the parking lot, heading for Johnathan’s car, he reached for her shoulder. “Hey.”
Nancy turned to face him, not wanting to waste any time. “What?”
“I’m sorry. About Barb. I know she meant a lot to you.”
She didn’t know how to respond to that. Johnathan would never know how much Barb meant to her. Not in that way. But that wouldn’t be something she would tell him, or anyone. Instead, she cleared her throat. “Yeah. She did.”
Nancy opened the passenger door, but Johnathan stopped her again. Jesus Christ. She glared at him. “What?”
He didn’t react to her sharp tone. “You’re allowed to miss her. I would if it was Will. I…I don’t know what I would do without him. I’m not sure I could keep going.”
She shook her head, looking at him one last time. “There’s no time. We can’t afford to waste a second of what little we have.”
Johnathan sighed but didn’t press the issue. He just climbed into the driver's seat and started the car. Nancy slid on the opposite side, strapping herself in as they left the school in silence. As Johnathan drove, Nancy allowed herself a moment to think. She knew what Barb would say if she were here.
“Don’t be stupid, Nance. It’s not your fault. You’re not responsible for everyone.”
Nancy let one last tear slip before shutting the voice out.
But I was responsible for you.
xxxxxx
When they reached the police station Johnathan made sure to park down the street so no one would see them get in or out. As Nancy looked around the parking lot, she noticed only one of the officer cars was there. The office light was the only one on.
“Is no one there?”
Johnathan rolled his eyes. “Maybe Powell. Why would they bother with extra security? They’re convinced that everything’s fine.”
Nancy huffed. “I’ve gathered that. Will everything still be there?”
“Probably. This just happened today. All we have to do is go inside.”
She nodded, jumping out of the car with Johnathan following behind her. As they crept around to the back side of the station, Nancy went to the door first, slowly twisting the knob. The only officer present was sitting at his desk with his feet up, smoking a cigarette and listening to the radio.
Johnathan snatched the box exactly from where it had been left. Nancy grabbed a fire extinguisher off the side of the wall to put out the more dangerous part of their plan.
That was way easier than it should have been.
They raced down the back of the building, practically tripping over their feet in their haste. Johnathan threw the box in the trunk, Nancy shoving the fire extinguisher with it. She shoved his shoulder, slamming the door shut.
“Go.”
“Okay, okay, you don’t have to push me.”
“Do you really want to get caught?”
“No, Nancy. But how about you take your anger out on that supernatural son of a bitch instead of me?”
She rolled her eyes, but couldn’t stop the small smile spreading across her face as they drove off. “Sure. I didn’t realize I had fists of steel.”
Johnathan smirked. “You don’t. I just have really skinny arms.”
“Skinny arms that beat the absolute shit out of Steve Harrington.”
He sighed, taking one hand off the wheel and rubbing the back of his neck. “I’m sorry about that. I know you like him.”
Nancy shook her head. “Don’t assume I didn’t appreciate it. He had at least one punch coming, probably ten.”
“Glad to know getting arrested was worth it.”
She opened her mouth to respond when she felt the car come to a stop. They were already at the Byers’ house. Nancy looked up at the door, her heart pounding. They couldn’t waste a single second being afraid. It was time to end this.
Nancy glanced at Johnathan. “Ready?”
He nodded. “Ready.”
xxxxxx
After grabbing the box and fire extinguisher from the trunk, they raced inside and began putting the Christmas lights back up. It was the only way to communicate with that thing and draw it out. Nancy and Johnathan might be bait, but they would be bait that fought back.
Johnathan grabbed Nancy’s baseball bat, taking a hammer and nails with him as he sat on the floor. He looked at her as if searching for permission to keep going, and when she nodded, he slammed the nails into the middle of the bat. Nancy sat on the balls of her feet, watching him before standing up.
She grabbed the pistol, loading it as if she had been doing it her entire life. She stuck it in the side of her pants before moving to pour gasoline all over the floor. Just in case.
They set out the bear traps, put up alert strings, and loaded every single gun they had. When they had made certain the house was set up properly, the only thing left to do was draw it inside.
She exchanged a look with Johnathan, staring deep into his eyes. Once again, it was near impossible to determine what he was thinking. But Nancy could tell, from the fire burning among his swirling emotions, he was just as angry as she was.
Johnathan walked over to the kitchen drawer, pulling out two knives. “Let’s go over the plan one more time.”
Nancy nodded, taking a knife from his hand. Johnathan took a deep breath, taking a lighter out of his pocket. “Remember-“
“Go straight into Will’s room. And-“
“Don’t step on the trap.”
“Wait for the yo-yo to move.”
“Then…”
He flicked the lighter on and off. They exchanged one final nod.
“You ready?”
“Ready.”
“On three.”
“One..”
“Two..”
He shook his head. “You don’t have to do this-“
“Johnathan, stop talking.”
“Three.”
Nancy sliced the kitchen knife across the palm of her hand, watching the blood flow down her wrist while Johnathan did the same. She revelled in the pain, happy to be hurting even just a bit.
“Now we wait.”
Johnathan grabbed the medical supplies they had gathered before moving them to the couch. As they sat down, he gently pulled her hand into his. He wrapped the wound carefully, as if afraid he would hurt her. Nancy was angry with herself for feeling nothing, not even a sting of pain, as her injury was bandaged.
“You know something?”
She looked up at him. “What?”
Johnathan hesitated. “I guess...I guess I never thought things could go so wrong. I know that sounds stupid, and believe me, I know shit can get bad. But I never saw it turning out like this.”
Nancy couldn’t think of what to say. What he said wasn’t stupid, because she never thought it would turn out like this. Never in a million years would she have predicted it all. But if Nancy was being honest, she wouldn’t have been prepared for a non-supernatural crisis, either. Not like Johnathan.
Sure, she would be screwed if her parents knew a thing about her. But she had barely admitted her attraction to herself, let alone anyone else. Not to mention that no matter how things went, Nancy’s family would always have had money. She would always have had a decent childhood, one that didn’t involve her worrying about being hit or losing her home.
Nancy wasn’t ready for anything. Not before this.
Not before she’d killed Barb.
She shook her head. “It’s not stupid, Johnathan. I..I didn’t see this coming, either, or at least it didn’t occur to me.” She snorted. “No one sees a supernatural monster from another dimension coming. And maybe someone like me isn’t allowed to say this, but I never pictured anything bad happening in terms of a normal sense. At least not to me.”
As she grabbed Johnathan’s hand to wrap it, he opened his mouth to respond. She couldn’t guess what he was going to say, and she honestly didn’t want to hear it. There was no point in his platitudes. But whatever it was, he wouldn’t get the chance. An awful creaking noise had just interrupted their conversation.
Nancy couldn’t help but look at the wall, her heart pounding. “Did you hear that?”
Johnathan glanced in the same direction, his face blank. “It’s just the wind.”
She must not have looked convinced, because he cleared his throat awkwardly. “Don’t worry. My mom, she said the lights speak when it comes.”
“Speak?”
“Blink. Think of them as alarms.”
Nancy nodded, absorbing herself in the task of wrapping Johnathan’s hand. Better to ground herself in reality before all hell broke loose. She glanced up at him, checking in with her work. “Is that too tight?”
His face flushed. “N-No, it’s fine. Thanks.”
She ran her finger over where the scar would be, surprised at how smooth his palms were. It was when he moved his fingers between hers that Nancy yanked her hand back, trembling with an unknown feeling. She had started it, but the minute he reciprocated, something inside her bucked and thrashed like an unbroken horse.
Why did there always have to be something wrong with her?
Johnathan looked immensely guilty, and at least had the sense not to reach for her again. He couldn’t meet her eyes, and Nancy knew he was working up the courage to apologize.
“N-Nancy?”
“Yeah?”
A loud, violent banging on the front door snapped them out of their conversation. They froze. It could be anyone. It could be the police, the government, the-
“Johnathan?”
Nancy was horrified. This could not be happening.
“Are you there, man? It’s…it’s Steve! Listen, I just want to talk!”
Johnathan looked at her, rigid with uncertainty. “W-What do we do?”
She shook her head. “What? What do you mean? It’s you he wants to talk to!”
“Yeah, but I just got arrested for assaulting him!”
“So what? Get him to go away! This is your house!”
“He’s your boyfriend! Maybe if you tell him to go, he’ll listen!”
Nancy rolled her eyes, ignoring the revulsion she felt at Steve Harrington being labeled as her boyfriend. “Fine. We don’t have time for this.”
She walked up to the door, opening it but not undoing the deadbolt. Steve’s bruised face came into view, and maybe a few days ago she would have felt bad. But not now. Not when they had a monster to kill.
Nancy didn’t waste time with pleasantries. “Steve, listen to me.”
Steve looked incredibly confused, as ever. “Nancy, what-”
She shook her head. “You need to leave.”
He sighed. “I’m not trying to start anything, okay?”
“I don’t care about that.”
Unfortunately for her, Steve wasn’t taking no for an answer. “No, no, no. Listen, I messed up, okay? I messed…messed up. Okay? Really. Please. I just want to make things right.”
Nancy could not care less. Even if she was willing to forgive that shit, there was more at stake here than…whatever this was. “Look-”
Steve narrowed his eyes. “Hey, what happened to your hand? Is that blood?”
Shit.
She pulled her hand away, holding it under her coat. “N-Nothing. It was an accident.”
Steve didn’t seem to believe her. “Wait, what’s going on?”
Nancy tried to push him back, holding the door with her shoulder. “Nothing.”
“Wait a sec. Did he do this to you? N-Nancy, let me in!”
“No! No, Steve!”
It was too late. He had already shoved past her and was staring in confused horror at the disaster that was Johnathan’s living room. “What is…What the…”
Johnathan stood up, moving Steve towards the door with frantic urgency. “You need to get out of here.”
“Whoa. What is all-”
“Listen to me, I’m not asking you, I’m telling you, get out of here!”
“Is that gasoline?”
Nancy moved to Johnathan’s side, pushing against Steve as well. This was so stupid. Nancy wasn’t going to let someone else die because of Steve Harrington. Not again.
Abandoning her first plan, Nancy pulled the gun from the waistband of her pants, pointing it directly at him. It was definitely loaded, and she wasn’t afraid to shoot. “Steve, get out!”
His eyes widened with terror, but he still didn’t move. “W-Wait, what? What is going on?”
Nancy wasn’t going to fuck with him, not anymore. “You have five seconds to get out of here.”
Steve held his hands out as if that would stop her. “Okay, is this a joke? Stop, put the gun down!”
She sighed. “I’m doing this for you.”
I’m doing it for Will.
Johnathan froze out of the corner of her eye. “Nancy.”
Steve still wasn’t getting the message. “Wait. Is this a…What is this?”
I’m doing it for Barb.
“Wait-”
“Three, two-”
“Nancy! The lights.”
She spun around to face the back wall, her mouth falling open when she saw the Christmas lights strung across the house flickering like mad. “It’s here.”
“Wait, what’s here?”
Ugh, Steve.
The lights flickered again, harsher.
There’s no time.
Nancy clutched her gun like a lifeline while Johnathan was pressed to her back holding the bat. She felt her breath coming short. “Where is it?”
“Where is what?”
Johnathan shook his head. “I don’t know! I don’t see it!”
“Hello? Will someone please explain to me what the hell is going-”
That’s when the ceiling caved in.
The monster fell through it, crashing to the floor and landing on all fours with a furious roar. Nancy immediately aimed her gun, firing shot after shot. The bullets didn’t seem to be doing any good, and she felt Johnathan’s arm wrap around her waist and spin her out of the living room.
“Get out of here!”
Nancy threw herself into Will’s bedroom, Johnathan and Steve following close behind. She heard the monster screech from the other side of the house and tried her best not to shudder.
“Jesus! Jesus! What the hell was that? What the hell was that?”
Johnathan and Nancy screamed in unison. “Shut up!”
They stood stock still facing Will’s door, Nancy with her gun and Johnathan with the lighter. It was too quiet, and the silence sent shivers down her spine. She could hear it chittering, the sound growing closer and closer. They all collectively held their breath.
Then it stopped.
Nancy whispered. “What’s it doing?”
Johnathan shook his head. “I don’t know.”
She looked at the yo-yo intently, waiting for it to move. The stillness of it was frightening, the yellow smiley face painted on the surface grinning mockingly back at them. It hadn’t shifted an inch.
Nancy’s breath hitched. “It’s not moving.”
Johnathan gripped the bat tighter. “We’re going to have to go out there.”
“Are you crazy? Did you guys see that thing? I don’t even know what it is! We can’t-“
Johnathan gave Steve a piercing glare. “We told you to leave. And no one said you had to come with us. Do us a favor and stay here. We don’t need a liability.”
Steve looked thoroughly offended, his face reddening with fury. “I-I’m not a liability! Or a coward! I’m on the basketball team!”
“Oh yeah, I forgot. Go ahead and shoot a three-pointer at the thing, we’ll see how well that goes.”
“Enough. Johnathan’s right, even if he could have said that differently.” She silenced Johnathan with a glare. As much as she agreed with him, he really could be an ass at the worst times. “Steve, if you’re going to be this worked up about it, stay in Will’s room. We can’t mess this up.”
He looked at her as if she were a whole new person, and Nancy hated it. If he’d spent half a second listening to anyone but himself, he would know that. She fully expected Steve to stay here. Hell, she wouldn’t be surprised if he jumped out the window.
But maybe Steve Harrington wasn’t a coward after all. He shook his head. “No. I-I’m sorry. I can’t let you guys go out there alone. It wouldn’t be right.”
Nancy didn’t say anything, just gave him a brisk nod. She was gaining some mild tolerance for him, but Nancy wouldn’t let him off the hook that easily. She prepped her gun, already thinking of a plan.
“Here’s what we’ll do. I’ll go out first-“
“Wait, why you?”
“I’m with Steve. Why you, Nancy?”
You’ve got to be kidding.
She raised an unamused eyebrow. “Do either of you want to get shot in the back of the head?”
Silence.
“That’s what I thought. As I was saying, I’ll go out first. Johnathan will cover my back with the bat. Steve will bring up the rear since the rest of our weapons are in the living room and he has no defense. Got it? Good.”
Nancy didn’t wait for a response, simply walked out the door expecting them to follow, which they did.
The hallway was dark, the bear trap spread out in the middle of the floor. It was untouched, and that made Nancy nervous. The house was silent except for a few creaks and small noises. She was convinced it was in the walls again, toying with them. This only drove her further. Nancy wasn’t going to let it escape. Not this time.
They crept around the side of the living room, looking over each other’s shoulders every second. When they reached the middle of the room, weapons at the ready, Steve started freaking out. “This is crazy. This is crazy! This is crazy!” He ran for the phone, and Nancy reached him in two strides, smacking it out of his hands.
“What are you doing- What are you doing? Are you insane?”
She knew they should have made him stay in Will’s room. “It’s going to come back! So you need to leave. Right. Now.”
Steve seemed to finally realize Nancy wasn’t kidding as she shoved him out the front door, locking it behind her. He stumbled out to his car, not looking back.
“That went about as well as I expected it to.”
Nancy glared at Johnathan, pushing herself against his back so they could cover every inch of the room. “You can tell me ‘I told you so’ later.”
The lights flashed violently again, electricity humming throughout the house.
She whipped her head from side to side. “Where is it?”
Jonathan looked as well, waving the bat wildly. “Come on! Come on, you son of a bitch!”
“You see it?”
“No, where-”
“Come on. Where are you? Come on!”
The room went dark.
Nancy saw four blood-red petals open up behind Johnathan’s back.
“Johnathan!”
The monster shoved him down with two of its large claws, knocking the bat out of his hand and pinning him to the ground. It roared in his face, saliva dripping from its jaws onto his skin.
Nancy felt her heart clench. “Johnathan!”
The monster got closer, stretching its mouth wider to swallow Johnathan’s head. He struggled underneath it, but its strength proved to be too much. Meanwhile, Nancy found herself frozen with fear.
It was happening again. Someone was going to get hurt while she just stood there, completely useless. She let it take Barb, and now it was taking Johnathan, and it was all-
Fuck that.
Nancy Wheeler was not a coward, she was not useless. And she sure as hell wasn’t going to let this thing take another one of her friends. Nancy wouldn’t make the same mistake again. She aimed her gun, firing directly at its face.
“Go to hell, you son of a bitch!”
It did the trick, at least in terms of a distraction, and now it was aiming for her. The monster took its claws away from Johnathan’s windpipe, leaving him sputtering for breath. Its growling intensified, more irritated by her bullets than anything. But Nancy didn’t stop shooting.
She didn’t move, even when she ran out of bullets. If she was going down, this thing was going down with her.
Suddenly, the bat swung across the monster’s face, knocking it away from Nancy. She expected to see Johnathan but instead came face to face with a wild-eyed Steve Harrington. Nancy never thought she’d be this happy to see him.
“Steve!”
He kept hitting it over and over with expert swings, driving it back into the hallway. Nancy ran to help Johnathan up, grabbing his hand just as the yellow yo-yo flew back from the chair, the bear trap snapping shut.
“It's in the trap!”
The monster squealed in frustration, trying to pull itself out.
“It's stuck!”
Nancy nodded. “Johnathan, now!”
He grabbed the lighter from his pocket, flicked it open and threw it in the middle of the hallway. They stood in defensive positions, ready to strike if the plan didn’t work.
The carpet burst into flames, lighting up the house. The fire crawled up the sides of the creature, causing it to screech in pain. It struggled and struggled, but it couldn’t move. Nancy wanted to vomit at the smell of burning flesh, but she felt a sick sense of satisfaction at being able to watch it suffer.
Johnathan raced for the fire extinguisher Nancy had grabbed, aiming it at the burning pyre in front of them. “Get back!” The flames were enveloped in a sea of white until the hallway had gone dark again. All three of them couldn’t stop coughing, the smoke and ash stinging their eyes and throats. Nancy was nervous about having limited vision, but by the time she could see properly, they were faced with a worse situation.
The monster was gone.
She turned anxiously in place, ready for it to jump out at any moment. “Where did it go?”
Johnathan was shaking his head, an exhausted tone creeping into his voice. “No. No. It has to be dead. It has to be.”
All that was left was an empty, slimy bear trap.
“Are you kidding me? After all that, that fucker still isn’t dead? I can’t believe this. I actually can’t believe this. I-”
Nancy would have pointed her gun at Steve’s head if she had any bullets left. “For the love of god, shut up! We don’t know anything yet. Now isn’t the time to lose our shit.” She glanced at Johnathan. “Is there any chance it could have gone back into the wall? Did your mom mention anything about it coming out and hiding afterwards?”
“It did once, but not any time after. I doubt it just disappeared into thin air, so it must still be somewhere inside the house. I just don’t know where.”
Nancy played with the edge of her jacket, thinking for a moment. It couldn’t just teleport wherever and whenever it wanted to. If that were the case, it would have been able to escape from the bear trap in a flash. Not to mention there were plenty of times it traveled by foot. The fact that it had been at Steve’s house was proof enough of that. But that still didn’t explain where it went.
That’s when she remembered Johnathan’s map.
Nancy spun to face him, jittery with determination. “Do you still have that map from before?”
“Y-Yeah. It's probably in my room.”
“Go get it.”
As he ran off, Nancy realized Steve was staring at her. She sighed. “What?”
He flushed as if he felt guilty for being caught. “I-I guess I just feel stupid, you know? This whole time I was so wrapped up in high school bullshit, I didn’t even notice something was wrong. And I was a jackass.”
“Yeah, you were.”
“Look, I just wanted to say-”
“Nancy, I found it.”
She turned straight back to Johnathan, Steve’s fifth apology forgotten. Nancy took the map, moving away from the trap and spreading it out on the least ruined part of the floor. She sat down on her knees, gesturing to the boys to kneel beside her.
“This is the map Johnathan drew up when we were trying to find the monster the first time.”
“The first time?”
“Shut up. See where these Xs are? These places are where we knew the monster had been at the time; Steve’s house, the woods where they found Will’s bike, and here. We knew that it was drawn to its victims by blood, but it didn’t explain why it just showed up at those places to start with. Especially here.”
Johnathan nodded. “Exactly. What’s your idea, Nancy?”
“We noticed all of these locations were really close, that it wasn’t traveling far. Our thought was that it would make it easier to find, but we didn’t really discuss it beyond that.”
She shuddered, thinking of the tree. “I think I know why it was traveling in those specific places. And why it can hide in the walls, but not disappear out of thin air.”
Johnathan’s eyes were wide with understanding, but Steve didn’t seem to be following her. “I don’t get it, what-”
“It’s a portal. This house, these walls, the lights, all of those places on the map. The monster is going back to the Upside Down. And then it's going to take someone else.”
“Are you serious? How do you know it will come back? We barely know anything about this thing! We thought we could kill it, and look what happened!”
“Steve, calm down.”
“That’s easy for you to say! You don’t-”
It was at that moment that lights flickered again.
Nancy was ready to jump into action, even with her lack of bullets. But Johnathan was staring at the ceiling in wonder, his expression a mixture of awe and fear. “Mom. Is that you? Mom?”
“Johnathan, what’s going on? What did you hear?”
But Johnathan didn’t answer, instead racing out onto the porch. Nancy followed him, Steve muttering about “insane shit” behind her. The lights outside flashed rapidly on and off, even the street lamps. Nancy understood immediately.
Something’s traveling.
“Where’s it going?”
Johnathan shook his head. “I don’t think that’s the monster.”
She realized what was happening. “Your mom’s in the Upside Down.”
“That means Hopper is too.”
“S-So what do we do then? What even is the “Upside Down,” some fantasy thing? Do we go there?”
Nancy glared at him. “No, Steve. You need to go home.” She turned back to Johnathan, a terrifying realization overtaking her. “We’re not going to the Upside Down. We need to go to the school.”
“What, why?”
Nancy raced back into the house, grabbing a different gun from the box and making sure it was loaded. “Think about it. Your mom and Hopper don’t know about the tree. That’s the only way to get to the Upside Down that we know of, besides Hawkins Lab.”
She grabbed an extra box of bullets in case she ran out, handing a gun to Johnathan as well. “If they’re in the Upside Down, they had to go through the lab, which means only the government could have let them in.” Nancy pulled her hair in a tighter ponytail, trembling as she gathered anything at all that could help.
“And if the government let them in, they know there’s no one watching the kids. They’re going to try and take Eleven.”
Johnathan nodded, a determined look on his face. “Then we need to get there. Now.”
xxxxxx
“Tell me why Steve Harrington is following us.”
“I’m sorry, Johnathan. He’s good with the baseball bat.”
Johnathan snorted, throwing their weapons into the trunk of his car a little too harshly. “Yeah, because that makes up for him almost getting us killed. Twice.”
Nancy jumped in the passenger side, glaring at him. “We need all the help we can get. Two guns are better than one. Pair those with a bat filled with nails and these assholes are fucked.”
He grabbed the keys and jammed them into the ignition, slamming the door behind him before driving off at top speed. “He’s lost his shit two times on us. Who’s to say he won’t do it again?”
Nancy hung on to the door handle, her heart pounding with adrenaline. “I was out of bullets! If he hadn’t come back in that house, you would have died!”
“Okay, but what about you?”
She looked out the window, ignoring his question. She had only thought about Johnathan, only thought about getting Will back. Nancy didn’t have anything left. Johnathan had so much to lose. So did his family. The choice was obvious.
“Nancy…”
“Don’t. It already happened, and we got lucky. We need to take advantage of that.”
They drove in complete silence the rest of the drive, still breaking the speed limit by at least twenty miles. It was only when they turned into the school that Johnathan spoke. His voice was calmer, if not a little sad.
“You didn’t tell me you were out of bullets.”
“It didn’t seem important.”
He sighed, sounding exhausted. “Nancy. You’re still a person. You matter too.”
Nancy got out the minute they’d parked. She didn’t look at him, unable to meet his eyes. “Some people matter more.”
And she shut the door behind her.
xxxxxx
Johnathan didn’t mention anything about their conversation as they raced into the school and Nancy appreciated it. She was glad that Johnathan was someone that knew when it was time to talk and time to act.
Unfortunately, Steve was not the same way.
The minute he pulled up beside them, he couldn’t keep his mouth shut.
They went in through the back door closest to the bus lot, avoiding the main entrance entirely. Nancy had her gun ready and loaded as they ran through hallway after hallway, her shoulders tensing every time the lights flickered. At any moment-
“What the hell are we supposed to do? These are people we’re chasing. We can’t just kill people! That’s a crime! What-”
Nancy glared at Steve. “If we don’t do something, there are four kids in this school that will die. You decided to come with us, so if you bail and shit goes wrong, that’s something you’ll have to live with. Choose.”
He shut up after that.
Johnathan suggested they set up something of a temporary hideout, and Nancy led them into the girl's bathroom. They ducked into the largest stall, sitting on their heels while they worked out what to do next. Nancy lowered her voice to a whisper.
“The last place they were at was the gym. Those suits got here before us, so they’ve probably run by this point.” Nancy felt a pang of guilt in her chest at this. “The school isn’t that big, but I have no idea where they could have gone. I couldn’t even begin to guess.”
Johnathan shot her a subtle sympathetic glance before speaking up. “I’d say the science lab. It’s the one place they hang out besides the AV club room. And there might be some means of self-defense they could use there.”
Nancy might not have known their location, but she remembered the layout of the school. Her heart sank. “That’s on the other side of the building.”
“And it would be too dangerous to split up.”
Nancy and Johnathan looked at Steve in surprise.
He shrugged, his cheeks pink. “What? I’m trying to help. There are only three of us. If someone gets caught by a whole group of creeps on their own, they’ll get creamed. We’ll just have to move fast, and I know some shortcuts.”
Johnathan raised an eyebrow. “You actually know where the science lab is?”
“I skipped class a lot, you gotta know how to avoid the teachers.”
“Ah, that makes more sense.”
Nancy interrupted them, growing impatient. “So how do we get there? We need to hurry.”
Steve snapped to attention. “Okay, the science lab is closest to the history classrooms, pretty much across from it. Mrs. Meyers’ old English classroom has a back door that leads out to the History hallway on the other side. Since we’re close to it, we need to get past the bathrooms, through those English classrooms, and out on the other side.”
Holy shit.
They must have stayed quiet for too long because he snapped. “What? I don’t like school, okay?”
Nancy shook her head. “It’s okay. Now we just need a plan for how we’re going to get there.”
xxxxxx
“This is a horrible plan.”
“We don’t have many options! We’re running out of time and so are they!”
Before they could talk much about their ideas in general, a volley of gunshots could be heard in the distance. At the same time, what little light they had was cut off, and they were plunged into darkness.
The only thing they could think to do at the moment was rush from their hiding place and head straight for the English hallway. They ran with reckless abandon because even Nancy had to admit a well-thought-out plan wouldn’t matter if the kids were already dead.
Steve was in the middle of their group, holding the bat over his shoulder. “Come on! Mrs. Meyers’ room is at the end of the hall!” He sped up, running with an intensity Nancy had never seen before. She and Johnathan were struggling to catch up.
His shoes skidded on the floor as he came to a stop in front of the last door. He pulled on the doorknob to open it, slamming his fist on the wood when it wouldn’t budge. “Fuck! It’s locked.”
Nancy wasn’t going to let this stop them. She shoved Steve out of the way, elbowing the small window on the front of the door with all her strength until it shattered. Ignoring the searing pain in her arm, she reached through the new opening and unlocked the door from the inside. Nancy shoved her way into the classroom, shouting at the boys behind her. “Let’s go!”
They raced through the classroom until they got to the office, not caring about the destruction they left behind. After barging through it and out onto the other side, Nancy realized where they were.
The history hallway.
And just around the corner of it was the science lab.
Nancy couldn’t hold back her relieved astonishment. “Steve…you were right.”
“It can happen every now and again.”
Johnathan rolled his eyes. “Don’t let it go to your head. We’ve got to get there first.”
As they ran towards the lab, Nancy heard voices.
“You want her, you have to kill us first!”
Mike.
“That’s right!”
Dustin.
“Eat shit!”
Lucas.
Then there was screaming, yelling, and Nancy couldn’t make herself wait any longer. She rounded the corner, coming face to face with government agents holding onto her brother and his friends, pulling their arms behind their backs. She pulled the safety off her gun, pointing it directly in front of her.
“Hey!”
They all looked up.
“Go to hell, asshats.”
Nancy made sure to aim at the agents holding the kids, shooting them in the shoulder and making them fall to the ground. She rushed forward, slamming the butt of her gun into their heads to knock them out. Johnathan and Steve had just arrived behind her, weapons at the ready.
Mike looked shocked as if he couldn’t believe they were real. “H-How did you know they would be here?”
She shook her head, making sure Mike knew there was no time to explain. “Lucky guess. Where’s Eleven?”
“I don’t believe that’s any of your concern.”
Only at that moment did Nancy notice the man with white hair standing behind them. He held Eleven in his arms, although he looked less than fatherly. His eyes gave the illusion of kindness, but Nancy could tell by the steel in his gaze that he was anything but.
Mike stepped forward, his face red with fury. “You may be her dad, but you’re a shitty one! You don’t own her! No one does!”
“Yeah!”
“El can make her own decisions!”
The man opened his mouth, prepared to speak, when the few lights above flickered on and off. Everyone froze. It was happening. Exactly like Nancy thought it would.
Mike looked terrified. “Blood.”
“What?”
“Blood.”
Nancy looked at the fallen agents around them, their blood spreading out across the floor, and her heart sank. She knew it would follow the trail, that was a given. She just didn’t think it would be so soon. The concrete wall in front of them began to crumble. Johnathan and Steve tensed their weapons at the ready. Nancy had her gun pointed in front of her, aimed and ready to fire.
Dustin whispered. “Demogorgon.”
The monster burst out of the wall, its mouth gaping with a ferocious roar. Mike grabbed Eleven by the collar, trying to drag her in the opposite direction. “Go, go, go, go, go!”
Steve stepped forward, throwing the bat to Johnathan and taking Eleven in his arms. Mike stared at him in shock until he kicked him with his foot. “Dude, run!”
Lucas shouted between breaths as they ran down the hall. “Where are we going?”
Mike yelled back. “The science lab! We need the tables!”
More gunshots echoed from down the hallway, along with human screams and the roar of the Demogorgen. Nancy felt the ground shake underneath her, nearly convinced it would collapse beneath them. They couldn’t just stand around without acting. She pounded her fist against the wall, getting everyone’s attention.
“Listen up! We don’t have much time, so we need to move as fast as we can.” She turned to Mike, Lucas, and Dustin. “Steve is going to take Eleven into the science lab and you three are going to stay there with her until we tell you otherwise. Lock the door and don’t fucking come out.”
She nodded to Johnathan and Steve. “We’re going to keep the Demogorgon busy until Eleven is better. We’ll give you as much time as we can, so take advantage of it. Got it?”
Mike nodded, focused only on the task at hand. Steve raced inside the lab, placing her gently on one of the tables and running back out. Lucas and Dustin grabbed Mike by the shoulder and dragged him into the room, slamming the door behind them and locking it.
Nancy turned to face the hallway, gun steady in her hands. Johnathan was beside her, his own weapon in the same position. She glanced at him, meeting his determined gaze. He raised an eyebrow, a tired smile on his face.
“Thanks for volunteering me.”
She snorted. “No problem. I’ll make sure this experience enhances your resume.”
“I doubt “saving the world from an inter-dimensional monster” will guarantee me a spot at NYU.”
Nancy opened her mouth to say something when Steve slid up beside them. He had the bat slung over his shoulder, his gaze wild with determination. “You guys ready?”
Johnathan looked at him, for once without utter hatred in his eyes. “Yeah.”
Suddenly the lights practically exploded above them, a vicious roaring traveling closer and closer. The pounding feet of the Demogorgon were fast approaching, and the minute Nancy saw its spiked petals open up, she stepped forward and fired. Johnathan moved with her, their bullets flying together. Steve managed to slip against the wall and was bashing the Demogorgon with the bat as hard as possible.
The Demogorgon howled in pain, being forced back a step by one of Nancy’s well-aimed shots. She allowed herself a moment of confidence.
We’re going to kill this fucking thing.
Her confidence was greatly misplaced.
Steve was thrown down the hallway, dazed and confused. But he, at least, was out of immediate danger.
The Demogorgon had a giant claw raised to strike Johnathan’s blind spot as he was trying to take out its upper left petal. Thinking only of Will, Nancy threw herself between Johnathan and the Demogorgon, kicking him to the side and shooting at what seemed to be the Demogorgon’s shoulder.
Nancy felt a stabbing sensation in her stomach as if she had been run through with a sword one hundred times over. The pain was unlike any she had ever experienced, and there was a throbbing in her head as she felt her body slam into the concrete wall.
“Nancy!”
She coughed, barely registering the blood dripping down her chin. Nancy vaguely recognized Johnathan’s face, his eyes panicked. She shoved him away, pointing at the door to the science lab with a trembling, yet determined finger.
“P-Protect them.”
“But-”
“Go!”
As Johnathan reluctantly ran in the opposite direction, Nancy felt her mind begin to drift. She was so heavy, and the world was growing dim. But she didn’t mind. She was so tired, and if this was the end, she was glad the people who mattered made it.
It’ll be okay. They’ll be okay.
And Nancy Wheeler closed her eyes.
xxxxxx
When Nancy woke up, she wasn’t expecting it.
Her eyes ached with the sting of fluorescent lights from above, and her middle felt as if it was on fire. She tried to sit up and immediately regretted it, excruciating pain lancing through her entire body. When Nancy raised a hand up to her face, she realized her head was wrapped in bandages.
“Good to see you awake.”
She turned to see Hopper standing in the doorway, and it was then that Nancy realized she was in a hospital. Hopper was patched up as well, although it seemed he didn’t need serious treatment. In a tidal wave of emotion, the memories of everything that had happened came rushing back. She struggled to move, even though it hurt like hell.
“W-Where is everyone? Are they okay? Mike, Eleven, Johnathan? And Will? I need-“
Hopper walked forward, his expression stern. “You don’t need to do anything. And before I update you, I want you to know that Johnathan told me what happened at the school.”
Shit.
He sighed, running a tired hand over his face. “What the fuck were you thinking, kid? You could’ve gotten yourself killed.”
Nancy felt her defenses rise. “I had to. The Demogorgon was going to kill Johnathan, I couldn’t let that happen. He needed to find Will, he had people to get back to.”
“And you don’t? What about your brother? Your parents?”
She gulped, feeling a knot in her throat. “Then where are they?”
“They’re with Will. All of them.” As he pulled up a chair, Hopper’s face didn’t show any sign of pity. He just looked at her with a deep, weary understanding. “I’m sorry. You’re too young to feel this kind of shit.”
Nancy settled back into her pillow, numb. “What kind of shit?”
Hopper put his hand over hers, and he felt so much like the father she never had that Nancy wanted to cry. “The kind of shit that makes you feel like you’ve got no one but yourself. The kind of shit that tells you everyone deserves a life. Just not you.”
She balled her other hand into a fist, shoving it into her mouth to keep from crying. Her voice came out as a hoarse mumble. “But I don’t have anyone else.”
At this, Hopper laughed. “Kid, you’ve got me. You’ve got John. We might not be enough, but we’re something.”
Nancy wanted to cry, she wanted to wail with pain. But there were questions she needed answered. So she took a deep breath and straightened up. “What happened after I passed out?”
Hopper sighed again, this time exasperated and fond. “You really don’t give up, do you? Well, a deal’s a deal. The Demo-what the hell was it? Yeah, it’s dead.”
Nancy felt a type of relief she didn’t think was possible. “T-They actually killed it. What about El?”
A shadow of utter heartbreak passed over Hopper’s face, and Nancy felt her heart sink. She found herself holding her breath.
“Nancy…she’s gone.” He sniffed, and she swore his eyes shone with tears. “She killed that fucker. But it took her with it. She’s not dead, she’s just…gone.”
Nancy couldn’t help but scoff, filled with intense bitterness. “We were supposed to protect her. I was. That’s why we went back. And I fucked it up.”
Hopper shook his head, the fire returning to his gaze. “Don’t make this about you. El made her choice and there was nothing anyone could have done to change that. Not even Mike.”
“But if I had just-“
“Kid, you did everything you were able to. And if you hadn’t shown up at that school, a lot more people would’ve gotten hurt. Or worse.”
Nancy nodded if only to appease him. If she hadn’t passed out in the middle of the fight maybe there was something else she could have done. She could have gone in with them, tried to buy them more time, used herself as bait, maybe-
She felt a warm hand on her shoulder and she looked up to see Hopper staring down at her. He squeezed it before walking to the door. “I gotta go check on the Byers,’ make sure they’re doing alright.” He gave her a soft smile as he left.
“Good luck, Wheeler.”
The minute he was gone, Nancy felt herself collapse onto her pillow, her vision blurred by tears and exhaustion. Everyone was okay, yes, but they had lost El. She couldn’t help but run through all of the possible scenarios in her mind where she prevented El from getting taken, and with each one, she felt her self-worth sinking lower and lower.
I’m such-
“Hey, Nancy.”
She turned to the door, hoping against hope to see at least one member of her family. Even her dad would be fine, and now Nancy realized how extremely desperate she was for affection. It was pathetic, especially when she knew better.
It was just Johnathan.
Nancy gave him a strained smile. “Hey.”
He took the chair Hopper had brought over, sitting down in it and twisting his fingers together. “They got Will out. My mom and Hopper. He should be okay, he just needs time to recover.”
Nancy felt immense relief at that, although not without a fresh wave of grief. “I’m glad. I just wish El was with us too.”
“I know. I feel the same way.”
They sat together in tense silence, both waiting for the other to speak first. Nancy knew what he was going to say, and she had a few choice words for him about telling Hopper everything. She had planned on chewing him out when Johnathan spoke first.
“You nearly died tonight.”
“I helped you get to Will, didn’t I?”
“That isn’t the point.”
“Then what is? I don’t see the prob-“
“Nancy, you weren’t breathing!”
His unexpected shout startled Nancy into silence. Johnathan was usually so quiet, even when arguing. But now he looked distraught and overwhelmed as if he didn’t know what to do with himself.
“We came back for you and you were gone. You were losing too much blood too fast, it wasn’t something we could stop. The only reason you’re still alive is because the paramedics got there in time.” He gulped. “Everyone thought you were dead.”
Nancy felt her usual defiance rising up inside her, ready to jump to her defense. “It doesn’t matter anymore. It’s over and Will is safe. That’s what’s important.”
She didn’t have it in her to bring up Eleven.
Johnathan sighed, putting his head in his hands. “Nancy, if this is because of Barb-”
“Don’t talk about her. You don’t know shit.”
“I know enough. I feel the same way about Will. If I had just paid more attention, if I insisted on driving him like I usually did, none of this would have happened.”
Nancy felt tears of anger and heartbreak push relentlessly behind her eyes. “Nothing about that is the same. You got Will back. You get to fix whatever it is you did wrong. Barb is gone forever, and I’ll always know that she could still be alive if I hadn’t been so selfish!”
She took a deep breath, grateful Johnathan hadn’t interrupted. “Barb was all I had. I always relied on her, and she should have been able to rely on me. Now there’s…there’s nothing left.”
Johnathan sat in careful silence before cautiously moving a hand over her own. “I know I can’t change your mind about Barb. But I will change your mind about one thing. You’re not alone. Even if you don’t have your family, you still have me. And Hopper. And probably my mom.”
Nancy let out a wet laugh. “I guess we have to be friends, you know? After all, fighting an inter-dimensional monster together is a pretty big step in our relationship.”
He grinned. “You’re right about that. Although I’d prefer not to label it for now.”
Nancy gave Johnathan a soft, small smile. She didn’t believe him, not at all. But the least she could do was make him feel better by pretending.
And all in all, Johnathan wasn’t a bad friend to have.
xxxxxx
December, 1983
It was easy to forget everything had fallen apart just a few short weeks ago, what with the glowing Christmas decorations and warm atmosphere. Mike and his friends were downstairs playing their game and Nancy’s mom was in the kitchen cooking. Nancy couldn’t bring herself to interact with any of them, although she was more inclined to talk to Mike if she had to choose.
She hadn’t forgotten that none had visited her in the hospital. They came to her room to sign the discharge papers and that was the end of it. She hated herself for being upset about it. It wasn’t a privilege she deserved. Nancy sighed from where she sat on her bed beside a half-wrapped camera, her mind distracting her from preparing Johnathan’s gift.
Ever since they had defeated the Demogorgon, she and Johnathan had become close friends. Nancy didn’t realize how much she missed having someone to confide in until Johnathan suddenly became that someone. Now they worked on the newspaper together, talked about writing, and good-naturedly teased each other nonstop about the other person’s flaws.
It was nice.
It was why Nancy spent all her money buying Johnathan a new camera.
She knew Steve should have been the one to replace it, considering he broke it, but he had made it pretty clear that wasn’t something he planned on doing. Nancy knew the only reason they were together, and it tore her insides to shreds. Avoiding that nauseating feeling was the only way she held herself together.
The sound of a car pulling up outside her house distracted Nancy from her thoughts. It was Johnathan if the tall, lanky figure walking up to their house was any indication. She quickly returned to his present, wrapping it with as much haste as possible.
The paper was a neutral brown color, resembling Johnathan’s hair. She decided to forgo a bow or ribbon, instead getting up off her bed to take it downstairs. Nancy heard Will’s voice from the hallway and knew she had to hurry. She took the steps two at a time and caught them just as Johnathan had opened the door.
“Hey, Johnathan, wait up.”
Johnathan turned to face her, giving her an awkward but gentle smile. “Uh-”
She shoved the gift in his hands, suddenly unsure of what to say. Nancy had never given a gift to anyone but Barb before. “Merry Christmas.”
Johnathan looked at the box, genuinely surprised someone else had thought of him. “Thanks, um…I…I didn’t get you anything. I feel bad.”
Nancy waved him off immediately. “No. No, it’s, uh, it’s not really a present. It’s, um…Well, you’ll see.”
They stood in silence for a moment before Nancy found herself wrapping Johnathan in a hug. She leaned close and whispered in his ear. “Thanks for being my partner in this.”
He stiffened for a moment before slowly putting his arms around her. “T-Thanks for being mine.”
When Johnathan let go and said goodbye Nancy went straight upstairs, ignoring her mom asking her about the hug. She went into her room and shut the door behind her, locking it. Nancy watched Johnathan pull away from their house, keeping her eyes fixed on the car until it was out of sight.
I can’t lose anyone else.
Nancy didn’t realize she hadn’t been breathing until she looked away from the window. Her sweater felt itchy like millions of ants crawling across her skin. She tore the sweater off, trying to free her skin from the flames and her lungs from the lack of air. Nancy leaned over the side of her bed, gasping frantically.
She had no idea how long it took her to calm down, but she assumed it was a decent amount of time considering that her body was finally experiencing the December chill. As she went to her closet to grab some pyjamas, Nancy caught a glimpse of her bare torso in her dresser mirror.
The Demogorgon’s wound had healed, but the scars were ugly. They crisscrossed along her belly in deep, angry lines. Its claws had nearly pierced through her middle, making it seem as if her entire midsection had been torn out by an angry wolf.
Nancy sighed, turning away and reaching for a shirt. She had wished those talons had gone just a little deeper, drawn a bit more blood. That way her actions in the end would have meant something. Instead, here she was enjoying Christmas break.
It made sense that the cruellest form of punishment was living with her crimes.
Before going to sleep, Nancy opened her bedside table drawer. She dug through the papers and books to the very bottom, relieved when she felt the hard, metal handle in her fingers. It only made sense to keep the pistol loaded and nearby.
Just in case.
Nancy had a feeling things weren’t over. Not even close.
She might not be a warrior anymore, not like she promised Barb, but she would be ready.
And this time, Nancy Wheeler would win.