Work Text:
"You know she won't remember you," Silver Wolf says, leaning against the door frame. "I know, but I have to-" Kafka cuts herself off. She knows it's meaningless to even try. But she needs some sort of closer or comfort. Something to tell her that the Stelle she knew and loved is still there. She never got to finish what she wanted to say to her then, and now she finally has a chance to tell her everything she's ever wanted; it's right here, in the palm of her hand. One message and she'll finally be able to tell her.... everything...
But she *cant* tell her everything. Stelle doesn't remember her. It *has* to be this way. This feeling is eating away at her like a parasite. The memories of shopping, stealing, trying on coats and sunglasses to lay together underneath the night sky looking at the endless blanket of stars, hoping to one day explore the universe together. Sometimes talking, mostly just staring and enjoying the time they had together. Kafka wants Stelle to remember, she wants to reminisce with her old friend..... but she can't. It's not a part of the script. She can't just magically make Stelle remember everything even if she could do that, would she?
Elio promised her if she did everything he told her to do then everything would work itself out in the end; she can't interfere no matter how much she might want to. She just needs to follow the script Elio set forth and Stelle would be hers. Stelle is her destiny after all…Elio promised she would change her, he gave her a 2nd chance she can't mess it up… not again. She stares blankly at her phone thinking of what to say or even talk about. She rolls over on her back as she finally just sends the first text. A simple "Hi Stelle~" is all she could muster off hoping to come off as playful so she seems less intimidated by her.
Kafka waited in silence for a response hoping Stelle doesn't just leave her on read like she used to do. Minutes passed and no response. Kafka thought she should follow it up with a question to prompt a response from the trailblazer "I know you've been doing some missions recently, I'm wondering how do you feel after you complete them?" This was her way of judging whether or not her Stelle was still there, maybe just a small part of her was lingering about even after the memory wipe. Kafka would cling to anything Stelle gave her. She set her phone down on her stomach as she looked up at the ceiling, hoping, praying for any kind of response.
Seconds turned into minutes and minutes turned into hours when finally. Kafka's phone lit up and a faint "ding" noise echoed throughout the room. A message popped up, from Stelle. Kafka smiled gently as she opened her phone to read what the trash panda sent her. "I want to do more. I feel fulfilled after every mission it makes me…. Happy." Her gentle smile from before turned into a big smile, she could no longer try and hold her feelings. This 1 single response gave Kafka hope… hope that she's still the same as she was before. "Wonderful… you still haven't changed…"
Almost instantaneously Kafka's phone lights up again. "I feel… empty. I can't remember… anything" Reading that message makes Kafka's heart drop, her smile now starting to fade away. She hated to have to wipe her memory but… it was necessary. "Ah…. A pity. There's nothing I can do about that. But if I ever need help, I'll come find you~ After all I'm still the same old me." Kafka realizes how silly the last line sounds, why did she say that when Stelle wouldn't remember what she was like? Kafka still hasn't fully grasped the fact Stelle truly remembers nothing.
Once again met with the quiet darkness of the room Kafka's thoughts start to wonder again. She glances over by her shelf where her accessories lie. A pair of small black glasses she always wears on her head. The very same pair Stelle gave her one "shopping" spree they went on. More memories start to flood in like how Stelle loves sweets, she would pig out everytime cake or anything sweet was mentioned. It embarrassed Kafka how messy Stelle could be when it came to sweets... but now she misses it more than ever. She wishes she could sit and watch as Stelle stuffs her mouth with cake and stares into her eyes and just laughs and smiles with her again... Kafka just wants any second of the time they spent together back. She never knew how much she enjoyed her company until she no longer had it... She starts to feel tears forming but before she can start crying her phone lights up again. "Even if you say that… I truly remember nothing" Kafka knew saying that was stupid but she couldn't help herself. Maybe there was some small chance she did remember what she was like. Silver Wolf did say she would remember her…
It was all for nought. Stelle really remembers nothing and Kafka had to come to terms with that. Kakfa rolled to her side as she stared blankly at Stelle's message. The only message Kafka could conjure up was "Yeah, I know." Bland. Surley to end the conversation there. But it was for the best as she hit send the tears from before started to come back and she couldn't hold them back any longer. Kafka rolled to her side and a tear rolled down her cheek and onto her pillow.The woman she once loved remembers nothing about her or their relationship. She's a complete stranger to her. Kafka has no choice but to just wait and play this game Elio put together. She has to trust him. That in the end all the terrible things she's done in the name of "Destiny" will all pay off and she can finally say those 3 words she has been dying to say to her all this time… "I love you" she whispers…
Her eyes grow heavy as she tries to fight to stay awake. If she were to fall asleep she was sure to dream about her and that's not something she could handle right now. More tears started to form and roll down onto her pillow now making it soaked with her tears. Kafka just hopes that one day all this pain and agony she's going through will all be worth it. That one day she will be with Stelle, the one she was meant to be with this entire time.