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His eyes slowly open, adjusting to the darkness of the room. After he blinks away the remaining sleep, Dick turns to his left, picking up his phone on the nightstand to check the time. It's only ten after 3 in the morning. Which means for the sixth night in a row he’s having trouble sleeping through the night.
It’s been happening ever since they defeated Sebastian. He’s not experiencing nightmares or hallucinations, thankfully, but he keeps waking up with a sense of worry and uneasiness. Like if he opens his eyes and looks to the other side of the bed, she’ll be gone. And the reality of her being alive and well will be a figment of his imagination. But every time he checks on Kory beside him, she’s there. Safe and sound, sleeping peacefully.
Except for tonight.
When Dick takes the opportunity to check on Kory beside him, he sees that she’s gone. A small part of him has the urge to start panicking, but he quickly pushes it away and logic takes over. She probably went to the bathroom, he thinks to himself. Or maybe she woke up feeling thirsty and went to get some water or make herself some tea.
Dick lays his head back onto his pillow and impatiently waits for the sound of footsteps or a creak from the door. Some indication of his lover’s return. But it never comes. Ten minutes pass and there’s still no sign of Kory, causing the panic to creep back into his body. Instead of allowing his mind to run wild with worst case scenarios, he throws the covers to the side, gets out of bed and sets out to go looking for his girlfriend.
Once outside their room, he makes a beeline for the bathroom down the hall. The light is off, but he knocks on the door anyway just to be sure she’s not in there. There’s no answer, so he heads to the kitchen to continue his search.
Kory is nowhere to be seen but there’s an abandoned glass of water on the island which lets Dick know she had at least been there at one point. That alone releases some of the tension that had been building up inside of him.
He decides to try the training room next. Maybe she felt like burning off some steam. While they had been enjoying themselves the past few days with their new relationship and finally being home, they were also pretty busy. With the Titans being away for so long and the team only consisting of the two of them for now, they had a lot on things to catch up on and adjust to. It wasn’t anything they couldn’t handle, but still, it was challenging.
Dick swiftly turns on his heels to head to the training room but stops in his tracks when a glimpse of crimson locks catches his attention. He looks towards the balcony and sees Kory leaning on the ledge, her gaze focused on the stars.
He makes his way over, and carefully slides open the balcony door to both make known his presence and avoid startling her. She doesn’t turn around, although Dick sees her straighten up at the sound.
He continues walking until he’s standing right behind her. He rests both his hands on the ledge, encircling her body. Then he leans his head down and places 3 tender kisses on her temple, crook of her neck and shoulder. Dick feels Kory’s body shake beneath his lips from the light giggle she lets out.
“Did I wake you?” she asks softly, bringing her left hand up behind his head to run through the hair at his nape.
“No. Woke up on my own and noticed you were gone. Waited a bit for you to come back but...” he answers, standing up straight again.
“Wow, Grayson. Only a couple days of dating and you can’t live without me even for a for a few minutes,” she jokes, turning around in his arms to face him.
“Can you blame me?” he retorts with a small smirk. Although his eyes don’t match the playfulness of his lips. They still convey some of the worry he’d been feeling since waking up.
Quickly picking up on his mood, Kory lays a hand on his chest. “I’m okay. I promise. I just needed some fresh air.”
“Bad dream?”
While Dick hadn’t been experiencing them, Kory had had a nightmare the night of their first date. It was about Sebastian returning to get revenge, successfully hurting her family and destroying both her homes. And with how deeply she believes in her dreams, it had taken some time for Dick to calm her down and reassure her that that wasn’t possible. But she hasn’t had the dream since. She knows she got rid of him. He’s gone and so are his wicked parents. Though that fact doesn’t help her anxiety.
“More like...overthinking.”
“Obviously I can’t force you to share if you’re not ready, but I’d really like it if you did. And I’ll just listen if that’s all you need.”
Kory looks back at Dick with loving eyes. She instantly thinks back to their first night together almost two years ago and how even though she felt so close to him that night, she also felt distant when he didn’t want to confide in her. Now he was the one offering to talk and to be a shoulder to lean on. It makes her heart swell knowing how far they’ve come and grown together. She adores him so much. Which is part of the reason she’s out here now.
“I’m scared...”
Dick doesn’t respond. Instead, he moves his hands to her biceps and begins to gently caress them, silently prompting her to continue.
“I’m scared of what’s next for the future.”
He freezes, and a small frown forms on his face. “If this is about what I said the other night on the bridge, I-”
“No. No, of course not, Dick,” she interrupts, bringing her hands up to cradle his face. “I have absolutely zero doubts or fears about us and our future together.”
He once again stays silent, but Kory sees Dick relax at her words of reassurance.
“What I mean is...do you remember back at the bowling alley when I said I felt free? Like I had finally paid off a huge debt?”
“Yea.”
“Well obviously I was wrong about that. It’s still surreal how we managed that prophecy and everything that came along with it...Anyway, it got me thinking about when I was a little girl. My father would sometimes take me along on his diplomatic trips. His idea of spending quality time together, I guess. But on those trips, he would always remind me of how privileged our family was for our status and the powers we wielded,” she explains, folding her arms across her chest. “And because of that privilege, protecting our people and our home was our duty in return. “We live and breathe for Tamaran,” is what he’d say. I always hated hearing that. Not because I didn’t want to protect people, but because if I was living for everyone else that meant...”
“There’d be no room to live for yourself.”
"Exactly,” Kory says, giving him a small smile. She knew he’d understand. Bruce put him through a similar situation just recently in Gotham, and no doubt it was something he dealt with growing up as Robin too.
“As I got older, I just accepted that that was how my life would be. Honestly, that was my conclusion for a lot of things I didn’t agree with back home. Until I came to Earth, and I discovered freedom, friendship, love. Then I wanted more for myself than living for Tamaran. So, I stayed here. And the longer I did, the harder it made it to leave.”
Dick resumes caressing Kory’s arms as he notices the emotion building in her voice.
“For a little while, I thought that I could truly escape from my destiny. But every time I think that it’s over, that I’ve finally given enough, there’s something or someone else telling me that I’m obligated to do more. So, maybe that debt will never be paid. Maybe it’s just a never-ending cycle. Trigon may be gone but there’s probably a new threat, a new mission, waiting for me soon...but I... I’m just so ready to do my own thing. To live my life the way I want. I think I deserve that.”
Her voice cracks as she says those final words, and the tears she’d been trying to keep inside escape before she can stop them. Dick quickly gathers her into a hug, softly stroking her hair.
“Of course, you do,” he assures, holding her tightly.
“I’m just so tired,” she whispers into the crook of his neck.
“I know. I know.”
They remain tangled together, with Dick continuing to soothe Kory until her sobs stop. She then leans away just enough to look him in the eyes.
“X’hal, I’m sorry for dumping all of this on you at 3 am. You should be sleeping. You’ve been working so hard these past few days,” she says wiping away the last of her tears.
“Hey, never be sorry. I want you to tell me when something’s bothering you. Big or small. No matter the time or place. And before you say it, yes, I know that goes both ways.” he says, flashing her a small smirk.
She smiles back, but it falls a few seconds later. “Do you think I’m overreacting?”
“No. You’ve been through so much. More than anyone should have to. It’s understandable to feel like you need to keep looking over your shoulder, waiting for the next shoe to drop,” he moves his hands from her back to her face to cradle it. “But I also know firsthand that worrying about the what ifs never does any good. That it stops us from pursuing the things we desire and robs us of enjoying what’s right in front of us.”
“Maybe you’re right...”
“Just maybe?”
“Okay, you’re definitely right,” she admits with a small sigh. “It’s just...I’ve never been this happy. For the first time in my life, I feel like everything is right. Which means I have so much more to lose now. It’s unsettling.”
“I know how you feel. It’s a tough balancing act for sure, and I struggle with it too. But whatever comes your way, our way next, I know we’ll get through it.”
“How can you be so sure? We barely made it this last time. I don’t know how many close calls we have left.”
“Humans and Tamaraneans. They’re unstoppable together, remember?”
“Dick, I’m serious.”
“I am too, Kory. I’m skeptical about a lot of things,” he says, giving her a knowing look. “But I wholeheartedly believe that you and I, we’re stronger together. I love you.”
It’s not the first time he’s declared his love for her, but it still sends a tingle up her spine hearing the sentence come out of his mouth. Especially with how intently he looks at her when he says it. Like he not only needs her to hear those three words but feel them as well.
She leans forward and kisses him, sweetly yet fervently. “I love you too. And I don’t mean to come across as skeptical, but do you truly believe that’s enough, Dick? Love?”
He places his hands on her shoulders and gazes at her earnestly. “When I lost you in Trigon’s dream, I immediately gave into the darkness. It was like nothing else mattered after that. When I died, seeing that little girl...our little girl...helped bring me back to life. And hearing how I felt about you on that recorder broke you out of brainwashing. That’s pretty powerful for just love, don’t you think?”
Kory pauses for a moment to take in his words. Putting it like that, he’s right. Their love for each other has gotten them through some crazy situations. And she’s never said it aloud, but there’s a part of her that believes that that’s how she survived the whole ordeal with Sebastian and the prophecy. During her supernova, all she could think about was how badly she wanted to keep living, and to have the vision that Zadira showed her be a reality. Her, Dick and their family together and happy.
“Yea. Yea it is,” she replies, her signature bright smile growing on her face.
“And even if it can only carry us so far, we’ll figure the rest out together like we have since the beginning.”
“When did you become so inspiring?” Kory asks, shaking her head in awe.
“I have my moments,” Dick shrugs.
“Well, thank you. I needed to hear that.”
“You’re welcome. And if you need to hear it again, I’ll be there to remind you.”
She closes the gap between them again, their lips gently gliding against each other’s. After a moment they pull apart; but Dick keeps her close, nestling her against his chest. They fall into a peaceful silence, watching the nightlife below. Eventually Kory shivers, finally feeling the chill of the night.
“Ready to head back in?” Dick asks.
She simply nods and he takes her hand, leading her back to their room.
When they’re halfway through the kitchen, Kory suddenly stops in her tracks. “Hey, you said you lost me in Trigon’s dream. You never told me that.”
Dick turns around to face her, caught off guard by her words. He immediately thinks back to how Kory reacted to not being told about the vision he had of their daughter. He doesn’t want a repeat of that situation. But the difference now is that he can answer her honestly. He just hopes Kory will accept it.
“I know. And I should’ve...” he says apprehensively, “But I've tried to block it out of my memory. Pretend it wasn’t real.”
“You know what?” she starts, once again reading between his words. “I shouldn’t have brought it up again. Forget I said anything. Let’s go to bed.”
“No. No, it’s fine. I’m sorry for not telling you about it. And you just shared your thoughts with me, even though it wasn’t easy. I want to do the same. It goes both ways like I said.”
“Okay.”
Still holding her hand, Dick guides Kory towards the couch in the living room where he tells her everything.