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Tommy knew things Tommy knew things about Ghostbur that most people don't. One of those things is that Ghostbur remembers things if you look (or sound) happy. You could say the most depressed shit ever, but you looked happy, so he remembered it. But not the words, of course.
Tommy knows what he's going to do today. He always knew, in a sense. The blond went into his secret room and took flint & steel, with obsidian. He closed off the place and went to the portal. Ghostbur curiously follows him. He's at his bridge.
"Ghostbur," Tommy started turning around facing the ghost, smiling. "Yes, Tommy?" The latter replied just as happily.
"When I'm done, can you tell L'manburg something for me?" Tommy said cheerfully.
"Of course Tommy! What is it you want me to tell them?" Ghostbur replied, smiling at him. "Plant my remains by the L'mantree, please," Tommy said, turning around because he knew that his eyes (which was watering) would betray his current emotions.
"Plant? Silly Tommy, you're not a plant or a seed!" Ghostbur said giggling.
He gave Ghostbur the compass, a book he made (in case Ghostbur forgot, but mostly for the things he wants to tell Tubbo if he ever will see his best friend the president again), and a smile.
"Please give this to Tubbo after you said these words, okay big man?" The blonde said with the ghost nodding. He then walked off the edge, with a smile still present on his face.
May death welcome me with open arms, he thought.
TommyInnit tried to swim in the lava.
—
Tubbo was having another shitty day, as it usually was. Ghostbur came back though. (Tubbo doesn't know whether it's a good or bad thing.)
"Tubbo!" Says the echoing voice of the ghost behind him. "Tubbo, Tubbo, Tommy wanted me to tell you something!" Ghostbur said, smiling.
Hope fills Tubbo's heart.
Does Tommy want to tell him something? Is it to remove his exile? He'll do it in a heartbeat.
Dread followed the hope afterward. What if he doesn't want to do anything with Tubbo anymore? What if it says that it hates Tubbo? Tubbo doesn't mind it, in fact, he would be surprised if Tommy would ever forgive him.
"W-what is it?" He says, softly, his heart racing as Ghostbur opens his mouth to say it. "Plant me by the L'mantree, please," He said, and afterwards gave Tubbo a book with the Your Tubbo compass accompanying it.
The world stopped.
The young president can't process the words.
He opens the book hoping it says that it was a prank. The scarred boy tried to read, but his eyes were blurry and the words smushed into each other.
Tubbo takes a deep breath.
He's president. He can't look weak.
...Not now at least. He can cry when he's in his room.
Ghostbur leaves after he sees Fundy walking around. Tubbo takes another deep breath and goes to the portal. He can schedule the meetings another time. He just needs to... he needs to see Lodgeshedshire.
Tommy can't be dead.
Tubbo refuses that fact.
—
Lodgeshedshire looks like a desolate area.
The only thing he can hear is the ocean rocking on the shore, the wailing wind, and the groans of zombies. Tubbo distinctly notices there are no animals to be seen or to be heard.
"Tommy? Are you here?" He said, looking around. He walked, soon running, around Lodgeshedshire.
He couldn't spot the blonde-haired boy anywhere.
The young president fell onto his knees and cried in front of a tent, hours after trying to find his best friend (if he even has the privilege to call him that) , his heart burdened with the fact that Tommy's gone.
He never went home that night. He didn't want to.
Not yet, at least.
—
The few weeks after Tommy's death passed in a blur. There was a funeral if Tubbo tried hard enough to think. But it was way too exhausting to think. Or talk. Or sleep. Or eat.
Tubbo feels like someone ripped out of his soul, but only gave half back. Because Tubbo and Tommy were soulmates. Made for each other; complete each other. There's no Tubbo without Tommy and there's no Tommy without Tubbo.
Tubbo knew he did this. He never read the book. He knew what was in it, Tommy cursing at him, hating him.
Prime, Tubbo would do anything for Tommy to come back. He doesn't care if Tommy hates him or not. It's better than his other half to be dead.
He gave the presidency to Quackity and left L'manburg. At least he thinks he did. Or maybe Quackity told him that he took it. Either way, Tubbo knows he can't do it anymore.
He lives in Tommy's house now.
He cries most of the time, and if he’s not crying, he’s thinking.
—
Tubbo doesn't know what it is today, but he wants to do something. But, he doesn't know what.
Tired eyes fall upon the book. He wants to read it, he knows.
Tubbo weighs his options, and figuring it wouldn't hurt, so he picks up the book and reads it. The brunet was seen crying at Tommy's grave again today. Muttering words people didn't want to hear. They don't want to intrude on him. After all, they do the same thing.
—
It's been 3 months since Tommy's death, a month since he read the book.
Lately, he's been seeing letters appearing around him. Not questioning it, (he was too tired to care), he read them.
Tubbo knows who writes these letters.
It was Tommy. He recognized the handwriting, the words, everything.
Figuring the boy came when he was asleep, Tubbo stayed up all night, pretending to be asleep. He heard the door open and felt someone behind him.
Tubbo, assuming the paper has been put down, was about to confront Tommy. But he heard rustling, then felt a warm presence.
"Goodnight sweet Tubbo," An echoing voice said. A voice that sounded like Tommy.
"Tommy...?" He said, voice breaking, unused to being used. Tubbo sat up and saw him. His other half. But as a ghost.
His skin was very pale, but at the end of the fingertips and ears were black. Tommy, or Ghostinnit, was wearing a suit, the suit he wore when he was Tubbo's vice. When he was serious.
The ghost smiled, "Good morning, Tubs." Tubbo went and tried to hug the ghost, but for some reason, he didn't expect to actually hug him. He felt the warm arms hug him back. He cried that day, saying sorry repeatedly, with the ghost shushing and comforting him.
—
Tubbo hasn't seen the ghost since then. He read the letter and felt exhausted. But he had the urge to eat. And so he did.
Eating burnt eggs, his day started. He felt productive suddenly, and decided to fix Tommy's house a little.
Then the next day he also fixed Tommy's house.
Suddenly a month went by and the house was fixed, comfortable the way Tubbo likes it, but also has a lot of Tommy's vibes.
He smiled that day.
—
He started talking to people again.
First Ranboo, but he couldn't handle it at first. But slowly, he was used to someone's presence, talking to him. He talked to others as well.
Quackity, for example. It went well, in Tubbo's opinion. But no matter what Tubbo did, no matter how much Ranboo made him laugh, or how Quackity made him feel safe, he still felt alone. He would always feel this way, he knew.
Because, his other half, his soulmate, his best friend, a kind hand when the world was cruel, a warm smile when the world felt cold, Tommy, wasn't there.
It's been a year. Or two.
Tubbo doesn't know.
The SMP was calm most of the time. L'manburg didn't have a government (apparently Quackity also quit and no one wanted to be the president), just a community.
Tubbo can't find himself to care anymore.
—
Tubbo misses the ghost. Ghostbur is gone, Glatt is barely around (most people say he moved on), but Ghostinnit is still unknown.
People see him sometimes, other times he gives them gifts or letters.
Tubbo looked back and reminisced on the times with Tommy.
Tubbo never would be truly happy.
Tubbo never would be whole; he would forever miss his other part.
Today was the day that Tommy died.
Tubbo smiled and joined Tommy the same way he did; swimming in the warmth of lava.
Tubbo_ tried to swim in lava.
(Later, he would meet Tommy and they would reunite. The blond-haired boy would scold Tubbo for wasting his life, but ultimately stop, knowing he also couldn't live without the other.
They were soulmates after all.)