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Percy was plagued by nightmares. His dreams had always been eerie and sometimes too much to bear. He saw things that he deep down knew he wasn’t meant to see. Poseidon rarely has children who inherited gifts of prophecy, he had left that aspect of him to his nephew a long time ago. Percy wouldn’t call himself gifted with prophecy, he definitely could not see the future, but he knew could see more than he was meant to, and demigod dreams were rarely nice, reliving horrors of the past or listening to titans could be pretty horrifying.
His dreams had shifted after Tartarus. More so than seeing things he was not meant to see, he kept reliving his own hell, his torment in that pit. He would often wake up crying or screaming, feeling breathless and even more tired than before going to sleep. Initially he and Annabeth had clung together, despite it not helping much, the presence of someone was nice. But as they decided that perhaps their relationship was not what they thought it was and being friends was much better than this failing relationship, sleeping together had gotten a bit more awkward, especially as they started pursuing other romantic interests. It didn’t feel like a great loss, there were not any less nightmares with Annabeth, it was just that waking up alone sucked.
Then Apollo happened. At first Percy wasn’t even sure if they would spend the night together. He didn’t think that gods were the kind of lovers that stayed the night and cuddled in bed as he slept. Then there was the part of Apollo not sleeping, because gods did not really sleep like mortals. He felt awkward thinking about it. If Apollo stayed over would he be just watching Percy sleep all night?
It happened more naturally. It was exam season and Percy was too tired to do much. Apollo had surprised him with take out, since he was incapable of cooking despite insisting that he could do anything. He had helped Percy which was appreciated very much and helped get through the subjects quick enough to have some time to watch some old TV shows Percy vaguely remembered from his childhood and sit around to relax a bit, a miraculous occasion when Percy was swamped with exams.
Percy barely remembered going to bed, the exhaustion of the entire week smothering him in his one free moment to relax. His eyes were closing as Emily Deschanel was talking about something he couldn’t remember. Apollo was gently rubbing his shoulder and whispering to him that maybe it was time for bed. They could watch a seventeen years old TV show any time, Percy getting rest was more important, especially since he usually had trouble falling asleep, dreading the nightmares to come.
Apollo had walked him to bed with an arm wrapped around his waist, supporting him. Percy didn’t remember putting on his pajamas, but he woke up in them. As much as he knew that he could sleep anywhere with anything on him, thanks to all the quests he had been on, he really enjoyed the soft fabric and fluffy pillows more than the uncomfortable jeans digging into his waist and makeshift pillows. But in quests there was no choice. He hated being tired enough to pass out while studying and waking up to feel gross with yesterday’s clothes on, because he could have spared two minutes to save himself the pain of buttons and zippers leaving marks on his skin and chafing uncomfortably. He appreciated the little things Apollo did for him.
Then he noticed that Apollo was still there. There was an extra weight around his chest and a source of warmth pressed to his back. And a whisper of good morning, too clear compared to the usual morning grogginess that consumed Percy, indicating that the god probably spent the night awake. He did not want to focus on the implications of that, he felt too warm and comfortable to care about it as Apollo’s fingers traced patterns on his chest.
It took a while to realize why he felt so good and happy to be lazy in bed that morning. There had been no nightmares the night before, no interruptions to his sleep, no waking up to choking sobs and screams that seemed to bubble up from his throat. There had been nothing, only resting for the first time in a long time. He had missed a full night's sleep so much, and it only felt better that Apollo was with him. He basked in the dim light of the sun trying to get in through the thick dark curtains and the warmth of Apollo around him. “Five more minutes.” He mumbled. Gods, it had been so long since he said that, since he woke up eager to go back to sleep.
Percy slept the best when Apollo was around. Perhaps the god could ward off his nightmares, because ever since they got together Percy’s nightmares had decreased. They were still there, especially when Apollo was away, but when he was with Percy, he felt secure in his sleep. Waking up in Apollo’s warm embrace was the best part. There was nothing like waking up with his lover after getting a whole night of rest.
Of course Percy couldn’t help his curiosity, he had to ask. They were having a movie night watching a musical Apollo had insisted on, but Percy could not bring himself to focus on. “Do you have a deal with Hypnos or something? I have less nightmares.” It was out of the blue and random to ask, but he had been thinking about it for a while, and he was never good with the timing for these kinds of questions anyways.
Apollo looked at the screen for a while, and Percy was almost about to doubt if his question had been heard. Then again, Apollo was a god, and gods weren’t known for their straightforward answers or even giving answers in the first place. Eventually he replied. “I didn’t need to.” That was not what Percy was expecting. He knew Apollo had something to do with it, because their relationship alone wasn’t enough to stop his dreams all together. “So what did you do?”
Apollo looked guilty. “Your dreams…” He started quietly, almost unheard over the singing coming from the TV. “They stray close enough to my domain for me to block them.”
“I don’t see the future.”
“You see more than you’re meant to, and sometimes knowing the past and present can be more dangerous. You see things that you are not meant to see. Just close enough to my domain to influence.”
It was a strange thought. In one way relieved to be far from nightmares; on the other hand, a bit disturbing to know how easily his dreams could be manipulated or kept away. His intuition was what Percy relied on the most, his dreams, good or bad, were a part of him. As torturous as they could be, they had helped him through his quests and wars with the knowledge they provided.
It was touching that Apollo cared and wanted to help. While Percy would look for the day where he could not have nightmares or just deal with them himself, for now he chose to accept the kind gesture and the full night’s sleep. It had been so long since he had undisturbed sleep, he actually couldn’t remember the last time. Perhaps since Yancy?
For now Percy would accept Apollo chasing away his dreams, as much as it felt like he was confining a part of Percy that felt very integral to his being, cutting off a limb almost. Percy had not noticed how much his dreams were a part of him until he was left with barren darkness at night. It was better than cold sweat and hours of restless trashin until he could no longer pretend that lying in bed was achieving anything. One could stare at the ceiling for only so long and keep falling asleep at dawn to wake up a few hours later and face the world.
One day he would be able to fall asleep without Apollo having to chase away his dreams. Get actual rest without the void of something missing and wake up in his lover’s arms to a smile as bright as sunlight.
It was a film night, when they would eat at home and cuddle on the couch, feeling awfully domestic and cozy. It was warm in Apollo’s arms and under the blankets, almost a bit stifling. Dinner had been a homemade stew, a bit on the heavier side with the flavor, as Percy liked to add a tad too much wine and spice. It made him feel heavy, eyes drooping as the film failed to catch his attention. He didn’t notice when he fell asleep.
Percy hadn’t taken a nap in years, let alone fallen asleep like this, struggling to sleep due to stress and nightmares had been his norm for too long. He woke up not to dreams but the overwhelming warmth and the slight neck pain that came with falling asleep in a bad position. While there had been no dreams he didn’t feel the hollowness of Apollo keeping them away left behind, but the warm tranquility of just not having anything to chase away. There was something so inherently satisfying to waking up feeling like he was ready for more sleep, because it had been that restful and cozy. Something he was getting used to these days and just could not get enough of. He felt ready to move to bed and fall asleep again as Apollo worked out the kinks in his neck with one of his miraculous massages.
The room was dark with the credits rolling down black screen, and Apollo watching him, eyes a bit too shiny for the dim light of the screen and a bit too soft for a god. He had wordlessly picked up Percy to carry him to bed, keeping him warm. Percy didn’t have enough time to miss the weight and comfort of the thick blanket before he was buried under his comforter, a nice coolness to it making him shiver and snuggle to Apollo, the chill of the bed actually feeling nice against his overheated skin, soothing it.
Percy couldn’t help but smile as Apollo kissed the back of his neck before massaging gently. He was being extra gentle, his fingers grazing his scalp sometimes, helping him get back to sleep, drifting into darkness. When he woke up it was late morning and he felt restored. Apollo still had his arms around Percy, comforting and not the almost choking like he always felt when he was dispelling the dreams. This was something Percy hadn’t experienced in so long... But he could get used to it.