Chapter Text
To the average Hogwarts student, it would appear that James Potter was head over heels in love with Lily Evans. While that assumption is not exactly wrong, Sirius Black knew that James’ list of crushes extended far beyond the brilliant, red haired witch.
No, Lily Evans was not the only girl that James had been infatuated with. Over their 5 and a half years at Hogwarts, Sirius had seen James fall in love with girl after girl. Each change in season seemed to shift the focus of James’ affection.
Of course there was Evans, who James had proclaimed his fierce and loyal love to within the first 10 minutes of meeting her on the Hogwarts express. He was gone for her the minute she stuck up her nose at his overly arrogant introduction. Sirius, incredibly wise and observant for an 11 year old (if he did say so himself), believed the instant infatuation stemmed from the fact that James Potter had never been refused anything in his life before. But if you asked James, it was obviously the “clear moral character” that 11 year old Evans supposedly exhibited in that moment that attracted him.
And while Lily Evans was a constant through line in James’ love life, she was not the only one.
In second year, there was Daria Carrow, the 7th year Slytherin head girl who ratted out members of her own house after seeing them bully James.
After loaning James her doodle covered History of Magic notes, James decided Dorcas Meadows was the one for him. She’s so talented, Sirius, James would sigh with admiration, do you think she drew those hearts for me?
After Meadows, there was Lily Evans. Again. She blew up my potion! James would rant, She’s a trickster at heart! I knew we were meant for each other!
Then, of course, there was Marlene McKinnon, who’s beater skills impressed James so thoroughly Sirius had to talk him out of proposing at almost all of their 4th year Quidditch matches.
There was Sheila Bones from Hufflepuff, Cordelia Banna from Divination, Lily Evans again ( She may have called me an arrogant Toerag, but at least she’s calling me something, right??). There was Gerri Carthwell, Maddie Glaser, Lily Evans, Alice Fortescue, Edna Jones, Lily Evans , Sami Patil, Lily Evans, Meriam Brown, Pandora Lovegood, Lily Evans ( Her patronus is a doe, Pads, a doe!!) , Lily Evans, and- oh, how could Sirius forget- Lily Evans!
James Potter fell hard, and he fell quickly. But despite all his foolish attempts at flirting, Sirius couldn’t help but admire his friend's lovesick heart. If one thing could be said about James Potter, it was that he loved loving.
James was the best kind of overwhelming, and Sirius was thankful everyday that James’ love did not only extend to his romantic interests. James was affectionate to all his best friends. He offered all his physical affection to Sirius, which Sirius gladly and greedily received. He performed acts of service for Remus, making him cups of tea before the moon, casting warming charms in his jumpers when Moony wasn’t looking, giving him stag rides when he was overly stressed about school. The way he expressed his love for Peter was less obvious, not so in your face, but would consist of the two of them just hanging out by the fireplace on their own for a few hours every night. Sirius tried to crash their little party once, but James had respectfully yet fiercely told him to sod off, it’s Petey time.
Yes, James Potter, his best friend and brother, was the best kind of person to have around. He was the Marauders’ personal rainbow, their everlasting cheerleader, their very own professional cuddler.
So, it came as quite the surprise when Sirius joined James at breakfast after their 3rd moon with Moony to see him shrinking in on himself, anxiety etched into his features. His shoulders were tight and haunched, his eyes wide and looking at everything except Sirius. He looked, to put it simply, deathly afraid of everything and everyone.
“...Prongs?” Sirius called to his friend hesitantly, unsure what to make of the change in demeanour.
James flinched, and finally looked at Sirius. He seemed alarmed by Sirius’ presence; he pinched his eyebrows together and grimaced, before looking back down at his cereal.
“What’s got him so forlorn?” Evans asked from her spot down the table.
Wow. Things must be bad if The Lily Evans was asking after James.
“‘M not forlorn,” James said around a spoonful of cereal.
Sirius and Lily shared a you’ve got to be kidding me look, before Lily shrugged and turned away from the pair.
“What ever you say, Potter” she mumbled.
James frowned, before looking at Sirius, his eyes twinkling with something Sirius couldn’t quite put his finger on.
“Do you think Moony will be alright?” He asked softly.
Sirius scoffed.
“Is that what’s got your knickers in a twist? Moony’s Moony. He’ll be fine.”
“But what if he’s not? I never realized how hard it was for him. He always acts like he’s fine afterwards, but that’s obviously not true is it?”
Sirius opened his mouth to put James at ease, but James wasn’t finished.
“I mean, last month we were with him and he still dislocated his shoulder. And then what happens? Poppy lets him out of the hospital by lunch! Lunch, Sirius. I mean, c’mon, that boy rips himself apart during the transformation, tears his arm right out of his socket, and she lets him walk around like everything is fine only a few hours later? Vile, is what it is. Moony needs rest. He needs to be looked after- taken care of! Someone needs to watch him and make sure he doesn’t get out of bed for days.”
Sirius gaped as his friend ranted.
“I’m not saying you're wrong, Prongs, but don’t you think that’s a bit of an overreaction? Remus is strong, and you know how much he hates the hospital wing. If Poppy wants to let him go, he should go, yeah?”
“He is strong isn’t he?” James asks, a small smile tugging at his lips.
Sirius narrowed his eyes.
“What brought this on Prongs? Moon was good last night, wasn’t it?”
It was more difficult to tell on James' complexion but Sirius was almost certain he could make out a soft blush rising on his skin.
“I- It’s n-nothing.”
Sirius raised one graceful eyebrow. James averted his eyes.
“Wormtail!” James shouted frantically, seeing his friend at the Great Hall entrance, “over here good chap!” He waved his arms frantically, beckoning Peter over.
“Alright Lads?” Peter asked as he sat down.
“James is being weird,” Sirius teased.
“Am not!”
“Are too!”
“Am not!”
“Are t-”
“Bloody hell, stop it both of you, it’s too early for this.” Peter slumped down in his seat, dragging a hand down his face. “I’m absolutely knackered.” He complained as he rested his face in his palm. “I know it’s my turn to take transfiguration notes, but do you think one of you could take ‘em today? I don’t think I’ll be able to stay awake for more than 20 minutes, even if I try. Can already tell I’ll be getting detention tonight, maybe I should just bunk off…”
Sirius clapped his hand on Peter’s back.
“Sure, Pe-”
“I’ll do it!” James cut in, yelling in his attempt to get the words out before Sirius.
Those sat at Gryffindor table turned to look at James, who at least had the sense to look embarrassed and- ah, he was definitely blushing now.
“I just mean,” he lowered his voice, “I’ll take notes for Remus. I can do it. I’d be happy to, really. It’d be an honour.”
A loose, giddy smile flashed across his face before he tried, and failed, to smother it. The end result made him look rather constipated.
The hairs stood up on the back of Sirius' neck. He recognized that smile, he’d seen it on his best friend a million times, but it seemed very out of place at the moment. Sirius glanced over at Evans, whose attention was decidedly not on James.
“Padfoot’s right. You are being weird.”
“I’m not!” James spluttered, “Is it so wrong to be concerned about my- I mean our- Moony? These notes are so important to him- you know how determined he gets when it comes to school work- it’s a rather admirable quality is it not? He knows what is important to him, and, and he really cares about it. Like you can just tell he’s passionate about learning, right? His shoulders get so broad and stiff when he’s stressed about it, and his hands, merlin his hands! They are so ho… em, capable? At holding quills. Um, and they get really tense too. So why wouldn’t I want to help the man when it’s clear classes and notes are so important to him…” James heaved out a sigh and looked at Sirius and Peter with panicked eyes. He sat back in his seat, shoulders slumping, his unexpected ramble finally winding down.
Peter and Sirius stared at him openly.
James fidgeted a bit before sitting up straight and going right back into it.
“And he’s so smart it would actually be offensive, practically a crime, to not help him in his academic pursuits, you know? So yes, Wormtail, Padfoot, I will take Moony’s notes today.” He nodded definitively.
Sirius felt uneasy. James’ erratic behaviour was putting him on edge, and all he wanted to do was move along and far away from where this conversation was heading.
After minutes in silence, Peter, like a true Gryffindor, decided to take the plunge and break the ice.
“What-”
“I think I’m in love with Remus!” James slapped his hand violently over his own mouth. He looked stunned, surprised by his own words.
Peter choked on air, his cheeks turning a terrible red.
James slowly removed his hand and let his wiggly little smile, his lovesick smile Sirius corrected , break free.
Sirius… well… Sirius felt nothing. Maybe a little cold. Maybe like he had just eaten a dozen batches of Hagrid's rock cakes in one go.
Ok. So his best mate was in love with his other best mate. Sure. No problem. It’s not like Sirius is homophobic or anything. Just a little surprised, is all. James has always liked girls. But, he did suppose that if one were to like a boy, Moony would be the obvious choice.
Sirius wiped his clammy hands on his trousers and mentally shook himself. He knew he had to say something soon or James would start freaking out.
“Good on ya, mate.” Sirius’ voice didn’t sound like his own. It was high, flat, detached from his body. He wasn’t actually sure if it came from him or not.
James deflated a bit, but looked overall pleased that Sirius hadn’t cursed him out.
Peter started talking at this point, telling James they accepted him no matter what. But Sirius couldn’t pay attention. His brain was stuck in a loop.
His best friend was in love with Moony. His brother was in love with Moony. James Fleamont Potter was in love with Remus John Lupin. James and Remus. Prongs and Moony.
That was fine.
Perfectly fine.
Everything. Is. Fine.