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Xanxus is a genius and he knows it. He’s just uncomfortably aware that being very good at academics, strategy and battle prowess makes him a good mafia boss but it doesn’t erase his pathetic levels of emotional intelligence.
He knows how to seduce, targets that is. He has no idea how to actually land himself the man he wants and then keep him. Keeping him being the hard part because Xanxus is aware of his own looks. He could land a one night stand easily. No, it’s the longterm shit that kind of confuses him.
Worse. He hadn’t even realized he had a crush until that disaster of a mission. Tsunayoshi’s own coat had been a lost cause and the guy looked so pathetic and Xanxus is weak to him. So weak. So he’d given Tsunayoshi his own coat and refused to acknowledge the surge of warmth in his chest at the younger man’s smile.
Except that Tsunayoshi never returned the coat and Xanxus’ brain short-circuits every time he catches the younger man wearing it. It’s a level of unfair that Xanxus’, as the masochistic man he seems to be, looks forward to. Tsunayoshi is unfairly cute, add in all that lean muscle and the ability to break a man in two with his bare hands and it makes Xanxus’ brain evacuate the premises.
Fucking pathetic, that’s what it is.
And the little shit takes advantage of it without even meaning to. Which has led them to this moment, Xanxus is 100% sure that this is Lussuria’s fault somehow. Fucking trash, Xanxus will remember this.
Tsunayoshi is wearing one of Xanxus' hoodies, he'd given it to the heir yesterday night after the younger man had complained of being cold during the anime marathon that Xanxus had been too weak to deny him. There was pouting, damn it. And Xanxus is a weak, weak man.
Xanxus finds himself averting his eyes from Tsunayoshi's, if he pays attention to the pleading he's done for. So he tangles three fingers on the middle pocket of the hoodie and, without his permission, his arm flexes. Xanxus pulls Tsunayoshi closer to him until the younger sky is standing between Xanxus' legs.
"Come on, Xanxus! If we have the Christmas party here, Iemitsu won't come!"
Humming noncommittally, Xanxus ignores that it's a good point.
"Please? I'll make it up to you."
Fuck, it's giving Xanxus ideas. He makes the mistake of chancing a look at Tsunayoshi's face and freezes. Damn it, there's the pout of doom. "Fine."
"Really? You're the best Xanxus! Thank you, thank you, thank you!"
With an armful of excited Tsunayoshi and a kiss to his cheek, Xanxus decides that maybe having the Christmas party in the Varia Castle isn't such a bad thing.
Much later in the night, Squalo comes to drop off the new paperwork. "I'm judging you, shitty boss." The swordsman informs him dryly.
"Fuck off, shark trash."
The goddam Christmas party is a nightmare and a half to organize and it doesn’t help that Lussuria kept sending Tsunayoshi Xanxus’ way, wearing Xanxus clothes and with the ridiculous sweater paws that make Xanxus fold like wet paper every single time.
By the time the party actually happens, Xanxus has authorized so much shit that he has a hard time remembering it all. Which is why he feels justified in escaping to a corner to get absolutely wasted.
He has no idea how it happens but at some point during the night he ended up laying down on the couch with his head on Tsunayoshi’s lap and he’s not moving, thank you. The way Tsunayoshi’s fingers feel on his hair as the younger man pets him is just wonderful.
“Boss!” One of the baby-brats screams.
Xanxus grumbles, surrounding Tsunayoshi‘s waist possessively with his arm, “can’t you see we’re busy?”
Tsunayoshi laughs at him, “you’re so cute, Xanxus.”
“‘m not cute.” He’s not, dammit. He’s an assassin.
“Yes, you are.” Tsunayoshi insists happily, still carding those magic fingers through Xanxus’ hair. “I love it.”
Squalo snorts from wherever he is and Xanxus throws his glass blindly in what he hopes is the shitty shark’s direction. “Shut up, shark-face! I’m cute!”