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2015-06-29
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'Drunk' Thoughts

Summary:

Mikey has dealt with a drunk Frank on more than one occasion, but this time Frank's alone, and comforting his friend leads to Mikey making a small realization.

Notes:

Set between the Revenge Era and the start of the Black Parade Era.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

"I swear, I'm fine!"

"You're not fine man, now could you get off of me?" Mikey holds Frank by the shoulders and makes him sit down on the fold out chair. Mikey had woken up in the middle of the night, not really from anything in particular. It was just one of those nights where he'd randomly wake up from sleeping without a real cause. He had laid down longer to go back to sleep, but found it hard to, and in the end chose to go for a walk.

Instead of following through with this, he stumbled upon Frank, who'd taken one of their foldout chairs off the bus and set it up outside behind the bus like they normally would. It's pretty damn late now, so it's a bit of a surprise to Mikey that it's Frank he finds drinking a few beers instead of Gerard. As terrible as it sounds, he expected their lead singer to be in this chair and drunk out of his mind. It wouldn't be the first time, although Frank would be accompanying him sometimes from what Mikey remembers.

"C'mon Mikey, I'm fine really!" Frank said as he slumped into Mikey's arms with a dazed smile. Mikey had no idea how Gerard and Frank got this deliriously drunk during his hour nap after they finished their last show, but he knew he really didn't like the sight. When the younger Way had awoken from his nap, he had also found his two other bandmates asleep, so that explained why the other two had been left unsupervised and were able to drink to their hearts' content. He had discovered the drunk morons sat against the back of the band's bus outside, having shared a couple bottles together that were now all empty and strewn around on the ground. Mikey's first reaction was to roll his eyes after realizing he'd have to take care of them both.

"You guys are such dumbasses. You could've gotten more sleep, and we really need it after today's show," Mikey replied, moving Frank away and holding him in place to make sure he didn't fall over. He looked over at his older brother who gave him the same drunken grin, his small teeth showing and making him look like a young child.

"Relax, little brother, we can handle all this! It's no big deal. Once we settle down and sober up we'll get to bed."

"That'll take some time, and I'm not waking anyone up just so that we can babysit you for a little while. So tell me how long you guys have been sat on your asses out here."

Gerard and Frank shared a look, clearly trying to remember through the alcohol-induced haze in their heads. Frank returned his gaze to Mikey and answered, "Like, maybe thirty minutes?"

Mikey sighed and moved to stand in front of back of the bus, letting his head fall forward and hit the hard surface. This brought a giggle out of the two other men with him. "Please tell me you guys are never going to do this again?"

"No promises there Mikes. We would've let you guys in on the fun but you all were already knocked out inside, so we figured we'd do all this by ourselves," Gerard told him, putting a hand on the bus and pulling himself up, "It feels great, although we're waitin' to see how long it takes for us to puke."

Frank hunched over a little, covering his mouth. "Yeah, I think I'm up first. Gee, you should come with in case you have to."

"Nearest trashcan's a few feet from the bus next to that green door we exited from," Mikey informed them. Once they were out of sight, Mikey started picking up the empty bottles. Usually, the band got drunk together, mainly after a show, but they'd talk about it ahead of time. Sure, Mikey may have told them at the last minute that he'd be taking a nap, but he had no idea Frank and Gerard would randomly decide to drink 'til they lost it. He'd have to keep a closer eye on them even when he partictipated now. Who knows what those two could end up doing?

After he disposed of the bottles, Mikey went to the trashcan he had directed the drunk duo to, and discovered them slumped against each other on the ground against the wall, Frank leaning against Gerard's shoulder as the two mindlessly laughed at nothing.

The next time anyone got drunk, Mikey would make sure that it's not just these two alone. Frank was now giving his older brother a really weird look and it was starting to make Mikey uncomfortable. Gerard seemed oblivious. Whatever, Mikey would ignore it for now. Because at this moment, he had to take care of his idiot brother Gerard and said brother's idiot for a best friend.

Thankfully, the band and crew worked to help get Gerard sober later on. It worked great, since it took the singer only around two and a half weeks to get better. The band's late night drinking rarely occurred anymore, mostly serving as a reward for an excellent performance. However, they did this mainly to space out the drinking times for Gerard's sake. They're positive that Gerard had already realized this, but had chosen not to say anything about it since things were better now that they've started decreasing the amount they drank. The change had left a more positive effect on the group as a whole.

Now, though, to see Frank out here - without Gerard no less - is a shock. "Why are you even out here, Frank? Everybody's asleep. Hell, even Gee is, and he's normally the one in your current position. There's got to be a reason right?" Mikey, with his hands planted firmly on Frank's shoulders, is looking directly into the shorter man's eyes. He knows that his normally well concealed concern and care is starting to show in his own eyes.

Frank sets his bottle down next to the chair and slips out of Mikey's grasp. Standing a foot or two away from Mikey, his back faces the younger sibling when he places his hands on his hips and huffs. "You know how Gerard talks about that dark shit that goes through his head? Well, I'm not saying that I take it to the same level he does, but there's some bad stuff that runs through mine. Even though I'm drunk as shit, I'm not gonna let every single personal thing come out of my mouth. So I'll sum it up, short and simple: I hate myself and a lot of things about me. Smiling and saying otherwise is pretty easy, Mikey Way, and it's a great cover."

"Why?"

"Because so far everyone's believed it."

Mikey doesn't realize that he's seated himself on the fold out chair as Frank spoke, but continues to stare at the man's back. "Being drunk makes it easier to tell the truth," he states.

"Yup." Frank spins around and looks directly at him. "You don't wanna know about some of the things in my own mind," he says, tapping the side of his head.

"I have a feeling some lyrics in Pencey Prep's work are a few of your own thoughts."

"Exactly."

Mikey watches Frank in silence as he moves to stand next to the seated brother. He knows that Frank gives everything he has on stage. He'll sing and scream with so much (possibly pent up) emotion that it makes him look like an entirely different person in Mikey's eyes. Gerard and Ray would agree on that. There's probably more to the source of all of Frank's energy that he hasn't told Mikey, but what he has told him reminds him a lot of his older brother's thoughts. Perhaps Gee and Frank have shared these thoughts with each other before, when it's just the two of them. At least Gerard has another person to connect to about the things he thinks about and how he still feels nowadays. "So, you write any of your own songs lately expressing this stuff?"

"Maybe. There's lyrics, but no other written parts. I'm just venting really, so it's not like they're going to be performed anywhere. But it's dark, violent, and just not something I think you guys need to hear right now. That's more for your sake than mine."

"Ever want to just let it out though?"

"Nah, my mind should be focused on you guys, not my own personal agenda. My mental health isn't important enough to worry about. We've got to worry about the band as a whole, not just me."

Would Mikey be surprised if Frank is in the same mental state as Gerard? No. They've all been dealing with a lot of shit, hell, including Ray even if he never mentions it. Drinking alone signals something's wrong, leading to the barely helpful one-on-one talks. This one will end the same way, so Mikey might as well just do whatever to help Frank. He figures he shouldn't pry too much, and he doesn't want to pressure the guy into telling him personal things he'd rather keep to himself. He asks the other man, "Do you wanna talk this out or hug and get it over with?"

"Hugging's good," Frank answers, giving Mikey a smile. The way Frank switches moves when drunk is like a lightswitch. He could go back and forth between emotionally wrecked and crushed to energetic and lighthearted. Mikey doesn't know how he does it so easily, since he can't even do that when he's drunk himself.

Frank does the unexpected and doesn't go for the traditional hug that Mikey gives to anyone he catches drunk all alone. Mikey had been going for Frank wrapping his arms around him while Mikey gave him awkward pats on the back that sent the message 'sorry I found you in this fucked up state all by yourself and that this is as much physical comfort as I can give but get your shit together please'.

Instead, Mikey has Frank in his lap, straddling him and arms wrapped around his neck. The look on Frank's face really unsettles Mikey. In fact, it's the same look he gave Gerard that one time Mikey had seen them drunk together. Now that he's getting the same attention, the emotion in Frank's eyes is making Mikey's heart pick up. This is the first time anyone's done this to the younger Way brother, so he has no clue how to react with Frank doing nothing but staring at him like this. While, admittedly, a drunk Frank is somewhat cute (well, Frank is somewhat cute, but Mikey will keep that to himself), he is not going to reciprocate anything the man in his lap does. If this was a different time and setting, when Frank was in a clearer state of mind, then maybe he'd follow the shorter man's lead. Right now though, Mikey has to refrain from moving anything besides his arms and head, because Frank could take any other movement with the lower half of his body the entirely wrong way.

"What are you doing?" Mikey asks, Frank tilting his head at the question.

"Going in for a hug?"

"I was gonna stand up and hug you."

"Yeah, but for now let's just go with this."

"Frank, c'mon, someone could see us like this and get the wrong idea."

"You know everybody's knocked out except for us. We'll be alright." Frank shifts a little, and even if there's no evidence of him being 'excited' in his current position, it still makes Mikey's heart stutter and his cheeks light up. Frank catches this and his lips stretch into an evil smirk. "Is the always stoic and bored Mikey Way embarassed?"

"Knock it off Frank." Mikey turns his head away from him, cheeks still warm as Frank repeats the movement. He prays that no one finds them like this.

"Aw, don't worry Mikes, it's really cute. And it may be the alcohol talkin', but it's also a bit-" Frank cuts himself off as he stares right at the young brother and licks his lower lip slowly, his tongue dragging over his lip ring and making it shine.

Out of the corner of his eye, Mikey sees the lip ring glisten from the light of the streetlight near them and he can't help his eyes darting there. Gerard's told him before that he likes it, that tiny, minor piece of jewelry that still manages to get his attention. Now Mikey thinks he can agree, and doesn't know when he had turned his head back to Frank but is too busy staring at the ring to care. Gee was right, it's oddly alluring up close. How exactly Gerard knows that, Mikey's not sure, although he'd have to be in the same proximity as Mikey is with Frank right now to really tell. The lip ring adds to Frank's look, and the tattoos Frank's been talking about getting could really make his whole image even better than it already is. He and Gerard both liked Frank's appearance, but it's only now when the short man was drunk that Mikey takes the time to really appreciate his look. And it's all thanks to this unnoticeable lip ring that- Wait, is it getting closer?

Mikey's eyes snap up and takes in Frank's face steadily moving closer, their eyes both gazing directly at each other. Mikey holds his breath, and is surprised that he hasn't moved away yet. There's some kind of weight in Frank's eyes that holds him in place, and while Mikey knows that the right thing to do would be to gently push Frank away, he doesn't. Hell, Mikey has to admit he could be harboring a very small crush on the other guitarist, not that he's willing to admit it to anyone. He figured he was just attracted to Frank's playing ability, how he acts as if he's possessed by the music when they perform onstage, the soft side he could show sometimes when they were all drunk, Frank's giggle, how he closes his eyes when they practice alone and appears to be so into what he's playing- Fine, Mikey is attracted to Frank. It only took this drunken encounter for him to fully realize it, but at least he's certain of it. He's not going to make anything out of it though. They're not going to be a couple or anything. He and Frank are strictly friends in Mikey's mind. The attention he receives from Frank is the same attention Gerard gets.

Still, when Frank's eyes slide shut, Mikey can't help but stare at how pretty Frank's face truly is. He might even let his own eyes close and let what's coming happen. He lets out the breath he'd been holding this whole time, and Frank's lips part, making Mikey gulp when his attention is diverted to them. Those are going to be against his own lips in a matter of seconds.

Their lips are about to touch when the older Way brother appears from around the bus with an almost finished cigarette in hand and spots them, the two other men still too caught up in the moment to notice. The lead singer drops the cigarette onto the ground, crushing it with the sole of his shoe, and looks back up at his brother and Frank. He takes in their position- Frank straddling his little brother's lap and moving in for a kiss, lips parted and eyes closed, and Mikey sitting there doing nothing about it while most likely knowing what's about to happen and is absolutely willing to let it. Gerard frowns a little at the sight, a weird sensation swirling in his stomach. Effectively ruining the moment, he says, loud enough for them to hear, "Hey, havin' fun there?"

Mikey and Frank break out of their trance and immediately look at Gerard, who's come closer and is now standing about a foot away from them. Frank lets his arms drop from Mikey's neck and says, "Kinda. I'm drunk."

"You sure? Ya sound fine Frank."

"Guess it wore off."

"Yeah, you're fine," Mikey agrees, now trying to avoid looking at either of them. Did that mean that Frank had willingly done all of that? He ignores the little hopeful flutter in his stomach at the thought.

Gerard seems to study them for a minute, since he doesn't reply. When Mikey looks up at his brother, he notices Gee's hand just barely tightening into a fist. Mikey realizes that his brother isn't looking at him, and follows his gaze to see that he's actually watching Frank's lip ring instead. Frank is gazing up at Gerard, and dear God does Mikey feel really awkward. He understands now though why Gee is staring at the lip ring. That thing is pretty interesting.

"Right, okay," Mikey says, clearing his throat and bringing Frank and Gerard back to reality, "I think we should all go back to bed. We shouldn't waste anymore time out here." Frank slides out of his lap, and Mikey feels oddly cold without the shorter man's body near him.

Frank doesn't bother picking up his bottle, and just closes the fold up chair, holding it at his side. "Yeah, let's go."

"C'mon, I won't say shit about tonight, although I am curious about what you two were doing out here," Gerard says before turning around and leading them back to the entrance of the bus. Mikey takes note of the slightly annoyed tone in his brother's voice.

"Ah, chill, Gee, we didn't do anything. We promise, right Mikes?"

"Yup."

"Well, it sure as hell didn't look like nothin'. With the way you two looked, you were gonna make out then start fuckin' if I hadn't shown up. But don't worry, like I said, I won't tell no one nothin'." They reach the entrance and Gerard disappears up the stairs, not waiting for the other two.

"That was fun, wasn't it?"

"Just don't pull that shit on me out of nowhere ever again, Frank."

"Heh, you liked it."

"I really want to hit you right now."

"In places other than just my face."

"Frank."

"I'm goin', I'm goin'." Frank takes the first step up, but pauses and turns around to face Mikey, who's now eye level with him. He rushes foward and pecks the younger brother on the lips, catching him by surprise and causing Mikey's cheeks to turn pink again. Frank pulls back and flashes him a cheeky smile. "G'night Mikey Way." He goes up the rest of the steps and leaves Mikey there, standing in place with a red face.

That little shit, Mikey thinks, letting his lips curl into a small smile.

Notes:

I grew to ship Frank with both Mikey and Ray not long after becoming a Frerard shipper. I wanted to write a Frikey story but never really decided on what to make it about. This story is kind of random, but I still wanted it to be non-AU. I figured that Mikey could have a small attraction to Frank but would never make anything out of his feelings. Gerard and Frank at this point have already recognized their attraction to each other, but haven't made it into anything big yet. I don't know, I thought this would be a small little cute thing but it expanded into what it is now. With this fic, I decided to break away from Frerard briefly to work with my second MCR ship. It was fun. Thank you for reading.