Chapter Text
Our names are Chip and Dale. And while many might think it has to do with those short-dressed dancers, it originally comes from a pun on famed furniture maker Thomas Chippendale. For chipmunks that live in tree trunks, the pun was perfect. And I can tell you that when Dale and I met, we had no idea what adventures lay ahead.
**********
I still vividly remember the day I met Dale. It was the middle of my third grade, in 1982, and the day had started as usual. My mother dropped me off at school like she does every morning and I immediately rushed off to my classroom. I didn’t have many friends at the time and I preferred not to be run over at the bell. So I stayed there, reading my lessons until the others arrived and settled in. I was expecting an ordinary day… when our teacher, Miss Clarabelle, used her bell to get our attention.
« We have a new student today. » she announced, catching the attention of little Chip who was starting to jot down today's date. « Everyone, say hello to Dale. »
« Hello everyone! Nice to meet you! » a small voice greets, which immediately intrigues the attention of the little chipmunk with chocolate brown fur dressed in a blue and white striped polo shirt.
He then leans over to see a small chipmunk like himself with lighter fur than him, with a bright red nose and wearing a white and green t-shirt with a red baseball cap which he has taken off to greet everyone. Except that nobody answers his greeting, looking at him with more or less indifference, which doesn’t really surprise Chip. The other boy, Dale, is visibly starting to feel a little nervous at the silence. He started to think quickly as he slowly backed away…then he looked behind him with a smile. He put his cap back on, ducked down, intriguing Chip, and when he turned around...
« AH! MY EYE! IT’S IN MY EYE!! » he yells as he turns around, holding a pencil as if he's somehow stuck it in his right eye, causing the other kids to scream and the frightened teacher to slowly backs away, covering her eyes, before accidentally falling out of the window.
Everyone was scared…except Chip who laughed. Certainly, the joke was clumsy because it was poorly prepared but there was something. Except that of course, when Dale confessed that it was a joke to calm everyone down...
« Ew! You’re weird! » one of the human girls gets annoyed, resting her head on her fist.
Chip looked at her before looking at the new kid who lowered his head, saddened that the others didn't want to be his friend.
I immediately understood that Dale was like me. That he needed a friend but he wouldn't get easily.
**********
At lunchtime, I found Dale sitting by himself at the table where I sat every day. The other kids glared at him and sneered at him. Having experienced this myself, I knew what I had to do.
« Hey! » Chip greets as he approaches, catching Dale's sad gaze. « Mind if I sit? » he asks, pointing to the empty seat.
Dale frowned, intrigued that someone would agree to be near him, but let the other chipmunk settle in with his metal Knight Rider lunchbox.
« That pencil thing you did was hilarious! It was excellent comic timing! » Chip congratulates before opening his lunchbox to take out his lunch.
« Really? » Dale wonders before turning sad again. « I kind of wish I hadn’t done it… »
« No way, man! The biggest risk is not taking any risk at all! » Chip assures, catching the newbie's look again. « You just didn’t set up the joke right. I can help you if you want. »
This made the other child smile slightly, encouraging the little one in the striped polo shirt.
« The name’s Chip! »
« I’m Dale! »
It was from there that Dale and I became inseparable! We were diametrically opposed since I liked to plan everything and think before acting while Dale was the non-thinking type… but we became best friends in the world!
**********
We were in the same class, but as if being together at school all the time wasn't enough, Dale came to my house every night. I sometimes went to his house, but since it was further away, his mother had nothing against him being more with us than with them. At our slumber parties, I introduced him to cheesy crust pizza and old black and white comedy movies. We started replicating the gags we saw and immediately gained popularity. In high school, we were even headliners in the talent show! Even though it was a team effort, I have to admit that it was Dale who mostly made them laugh. But seeing our success together, we decided to leave for California! That’s a fact, we hadn't finished school but… the biggest risk is not taking any risk at all, right?
Once there, we found a small apartment where we stayed for well over a year, writing gags of all kinds, working on our ''chipmunk'' voice as some people call it and going from casting to casting to make appearances in advertisements, in feature films but even sometimes playing with the famous Donald Duck. Finally, after a year of small roles enough to pay our rent, we finally got the call that changed our lives!
*****
Both Chip and Dale were hunched over the phone to hear what the art manager of a major animation studio was saying to them. He introduced himself politely, explaining to them that he was looking for new Toon talent and that their profile interested him. But when they thought of a new small role with the famous duck in a sailor suit, they didn’t expect to hear at all:
« Chip, Dale, how would you like your own show? »
The two friends freeze before looking at each other with the biggest smile they've ever had on their faces.
*****
That's how we got our own series. Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers! We were barely 16 and we were already stars of the small screen! The series featured a group of small detectives who solve big crimes. There was the adventurer Monterey Jack, the cute handygal Gadget and Zipper our little fly buddy who couldn't talk. And, of course, there was Dale and I, the archetypal comedy duo. I was the straight and logical hero and Dale was more of the fun-loving chipmunk. Everything was going very well, we had a life of dreams, we rubbed shoulders with the biggest stars… but everything changed suddenly the night we finished filming Rescue Rangers season 3 in 1990.
This evening will forever be etched in my memory. Everything had started very well with an episode shot perfectly almost without reshoots, a photo shoot worthy of the biggest stars of Hollywood, a party that promised to be perfect where Dale and I had so much fun. We joked, we laughed, we could relax after 1 year of hard work to get to this point and we only had to hope that it continued for a long time with season 4. A dream for any teenager! But while we were having fun with other Toons who came to congratulate us, without anyone noticing, Dale walked away from the party. Surprised that he didn't wait to be able to taste the cake prepared to celebrate the end of season 3, I saved him a slice and went to find him in the trailer that served as his dressing room.
**********
♫ Now, that we found love, what are we gonna do with it~ ♫ Chip sings as he arrives at Dale's trailer, surprising the youngest who jumps up trying to hide what he was displaying. « Hey, where’d you run off to, buddy? » he smiled as he joined him, a plate in his hand. « I saved you a piece of cake. »
Except that even though Dale was standing in front, the chipmunk in the brown jacket could see that it was a novelty in his friend's dressing room.
« What’s that? »
« Okay… » Dale begins, still with a smile on his face. « I wasn’t gonna show you this right now, but it just got delivered. So… Tada! »
He then steps aside to show a poster of him in a very nice black tuxedo, raising his hand as if holding a gun. It was such a parody of James Bond that Chip chuckled in amusement.
« Double 0 Dale? That’s hilarious. What is that? » the chocolate-colored chipmunk smiled.
« It’s wild, right? It’s my new show! I’m gonna be a super spy! » explains Dale, having fun pretending to be holding a gun before looking at Chip who frowns.
« Wh… What are you talking about? »
« Yeah, I’m really going for it. And just like you always say,... » the younger resumes before pushing his tuft of hair back and putting on a serious face. « ... The biggest risk is not taking any risk at all! »
He laughs as he goes behind his small changing area to take off his Hawaiian shirt, Chip just staring at him with more confusion and concern.
« Wait, wait… You… really have a new show? »
« Yep! »
« Wh… Why didn’t you talk to me about it first? We tell each other everything! » Chip is indignant as his friend changes his clothes. « You’ve told me what you had for lunch the last 42 days! »
« Pineapple pizza and a diet slice! » Dale replies, cocking his head out of his changing area to look at his friend.
« Exactly! »
« I don’t know. » the young chipmunk replied, emerging dressed in a beautiful shiny purple suit, a smile still on his face. « I just wanted to make sure the show was gonna happen first before I got your hopes up! »
« My hopes up? What!? » Chip chokes as Dale looks at himself in the full-length mirror of his dressing room, performing a few dance steps.
« Sure! This is good news for everyone! »
« Listen! If you do this, they might cancel the show! »
« No, they won’t do that! » Dale laughs while adjusting his suit. « I mean, everyone knows you’re the favorite. And I’m just the guy who gets hit in the head with a pipe each week. It’s fine. »
« Okay, let me get this straight! You’re gonna risk all of Rescue Rangers because I’m a little more popular than you? Do you know how dumb that is?! »
Dale tenses, as if hurt, then sighs.
« Well… I am the dumb one… »
Chip's eyes widen before sighing softly, giving him a sincere look.
« I didn’t mean it like that… »
« I know. You never mean it. » the younger chipmunk sighs. « Look, you’re always acting like you saved me or something. But when we were kids, we were in it together… »
« What are you talking about? » the chocolate-colored chipmunk is indignant. « We're still in it together! »
« I’m sorry, Chip. I’m just done being second banana… »
« But you’re not second banana! I’m a banana and you’re just another banana. Two bananas! » Chip argued, holding up two fingers.
The ringing from the large telephone in Dale's trailer interrupts the discussion, causing them to turn their heads towards the device. Chip immediately understands what this is about.
« Please don’t get that. » he begs even if his face wants to remain serious.
« But it could be my agent, Dave Bollinari, waiting for my answer to greenlit the show! » Dale smiled as he walked over to the phone.
« After everything I’ve done for you, do not pick up that phone. »
« Chip, I’m sorry but… »
« Dale, I mean it! We’re not done talking! » Chip gets annoyed, his voice showing more and more annoyance.
« I have to! » Dale insists, taking the phone in his hands.
« Do not. Do not do it! » the eldest of the two insists by pointing his finger at the telephone.
The red-nosed chipmunk looks down at the phone…then he whispers « I'm so sorry! » before picking up.
« Go for Dale! » he says in a cheerful voice as Chip freezes.
His heart breaks in his chest hearing his friend talking with his agent, a certain Dave Bollinari. As the conversation continues, he can't take any more and storms out of the trailer, slamming the door, tossing the piece of cake into the nearby bin and walking away, his fists clenched and his face clenched in anger.
Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers were canceled that summer, and Double 0 Dale was discontinued after the pilot.
**********
I resented Dale a lot. Maybe it was just a show business thing like there are a lot of in this bullies world and we were way too young to deal with it… but mostly I felt betrayed. For 8 years, we had promised each other to always be together, never to separate… our friendship had almost gone further than that… but Hollywood had shown us that friendship was only an illusion.
And it was on that day that I learned the greatest lesson of my life:
Better to be alone!