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“DAD!!” It was two in the fucking morning “What do you want Evergreen?” Barnaby had just fallen asleep “I wasn’t talking to you I was talking to dad” no one told them that Evergreen didn’t sleep before they adopted the immortal child “your dad is trying to sleep” when Barnaby texted him and told him he found ‘their new daughter’ this was not what Ohio was imagining “Can we put a tire swing in the forest on the roof?” Oh good, this question was an easy one “You’re gonna have to ask Morgan if we’re aloud too, but I also need to sleep, so if you’re aloud too you can ask Alex to help you.” Alex’s and Morgan’s sleep schedules were super tucked up anyway, they’ll probably be awake “Ok! I’ll go over there now!” And she was gone.
Alex and Morgan were in the living room of their apartment, watching a movie, sitting way closer together than friends would, until the door to the apartment bursted open “Morgan! Can we put a tire swing on the roof!?!” Ohio and Barnaby’s child “Sure” as long as Morgan didn’t have to help set up the tire swing, she didn’t care. “Alex! Will you help me put a tire swing on the roof!?!” If he says no will the child cry? “Why can’t you get your dad to do it?” If the child cries will Morgan be mad? “Dad’s sleeping” Barnaby probably does need sleep. “what about your other dad?” Will Ohio be mad at him if the child cries? “He said that he also needs sleep and that I should ask you for help.” god fucking damn it Ohio “Wait wait wait, why aren’t you sleeping, your five” oh yeah, small children do need sleep “sleep if for the weak” This child was not stronger than him ”I’m very strong, and I still sleep” “Sleep if for the mortal” that’s a bit better “my mortality is debatable” “Are you going to help me or not?” it’s easier to just avoid causing the child to cry.“Yeah, yeah, let’s go make a tire swing” “yay!”
“You can just summon a tire and rope right?” Was the child doubting him again? “Im the S-tier villain.” “It’s a yes or no question.” Alex is starting to think she takes after Ohio “YES” Alex snapped and was holding a tire and some rope. “Good. I can tie the rope to the tire, but I’m not tall enough to tie it to the tree.” Right. Five year olds were typically short. “Where do you want it to be?” “Near the pool but not too close to the pool.” Seems like she’s thought this through “Sounds like a plan”
“Alex. Where’s m-my child?” Was barnaby mad at him?? “Hello to you too dog boy” “Where. Is. My. Child.” He paused “You. bitch.” Ok, he was mad “Relax. She’s probably still in the tire swing.” “I’m s-sorry, the w-what?” Oh right, he was asleep earlier “The tire swing, we made it at two in the morning, did Ohio not tell you?” Ohio needed to start being a better husband “No. Ohio did, did not t-tell me.”
“Hey Evergreen? Me a-and Ohio are about to go to work so you’ll have to sp-spend the day with Morgan and A-alex.” Barnaby had finally found the tire swing “Ok!“ she launched herself off the tire swing “woah!” And right into Barnabys arms “When, when you get back can you, can you get me a skateboard please!” She was not tired at all “Why, why do you w-want a skateboard?” “Because, because, because, Ducky likes to skateboard! And if I get a skateboard then he can teach me how to skateboard and we can hang out more often!!” most of the things she wanted recently had to do with ducky “O-ok, how a-b-bout you a-ask Alex or M-morgan to buy you a sk-skateboard?” Unfortunately, Barnaby and Ohio did not have the same amount of money as ducky’s parents “OK!” And she was gone.