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"Jeff." he looked around at the concerned voice, raising an eyebrow at Annie. Her blue eyes were imploring, but he wasn't sure quite what she was appealing to - until she leant forward and rested her hand on his. His eyes flickered down, looking at the slender digits against his own.
"Can I see?" he turned his hand and let her take the almost-empty painkiller jar, watching her cautiously. Jeff wasn't totally up to date on what had happened to Annie in her former years, but all of the study group (even Pierce) seemed very careful about letting Annie handle any drug in front of them - even the low level painkillers he was on. She didn't seem to be having any issues, however; her eyes were scanning what it said on the little jar, as if to check he was taking the right dosage. When she handed it back, most of the table seemed to relax a little.
Now Annie realised that everyone's stare had switched to her. It was her turn to raise a confused eyebrow, glancing around at the assembled faces.
"What?" she asked, voice rising a little, drawing her head back. "Why are you guys all looking at me like that?"
"Why did you want to see his painkillers?" Britta asked, slowly. Her eyes flickered from Annie to Jeff, then down the table to Pierce, before settling back on Annie.
"He's not Pierce, Annie." ignoring the older man's offended 'Hey!' from down the table, Annie was looking between everyone, letting out her traditional offended squeak and starting to pout. Jeff rolled his eyes, pocketing the jar of drugs.
"I know that." She finally said, giving Jeff an unhappy look. "I just wanted to see - I was just wondering." the brunette tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, shifting in her seat - almost squirming under the scrutiny. "I'm not about to start taking drugs again, if that's what you're all thinking!"
"Annie, we're not-"
"No, Jeff! I know you all think that! Gotta be careful with pills around Annie, in case she goes all psycho again! I didn't put myself through all that rehab just to screw it all up again. I'm not going to mess myself up like that again. I was just making sure that you're dosing correctly." she looked down again, anger ebbing and fading into unhappiness. "I don't like it when my friends have to take pills, because I know how it can end. I mean, we know what happened to Pierce." she pointed out, "And I couldn't see that happen to anyone else. Especially not J- not just after we had to deal with you passing out everywhere. You scared the crap out of us!" she rounded on Jeff.
Leaning back slightly in his chair, Jeff tried to act cool but it was clear how jarred he was by Annie's explosion. His eyes flickered around the table. Shirley was looking at him with pity in her eyes; Pierce was looking slightly uncomfortable, hating having to admit that he was sort of concerned about their leader. Troy was looking a little lost, but that was his usual expression. Abed was - well, Abed. Blank. But he was paying attention with a level of fascination that was creepy if you don't know Abed. And Britta... Britta reached out and touched his hand. Jerking back as if stung, Jeff let his hands move into his lap, as Britta tried to pretend that hadn't bothered her. It was Shirley that broke the awkward silence.
"I think what Annie is trying to say," she said, very cautiously - trying to avoid Annie's wrath - "Is that all of us want to make sure you're getting better. We're here for you, Jeffrey. We care." and then she added something in a low mutter about him needing to find Jesus before he died.
There was nodding going on around the table.
"We just want you to be okay. You don't have to hide things from us, Jeff." Britta added.
"You gotta take care of yourself, man." Troy said, "I mean, without you, who's gonna teach us stuff like how to con fifty bucks out of people?"
"Jeffrey!" Shirley objected, but Jeff was grinning with a faint chuckle, nodding at Troy's comment.
"Guys." he held up his hands from the table in a gesture of surrender. "I'm fine. Genuinely. How long has it been since I passed out?" he asked, pointedly. "Yeah. I haven't since the day I went to the hospital. And that was last week. I'm doing fine. My headaches are getting better, and the symptoms are going away. I don't need mothering, I don't need scolding, and I definitely don't need keeping an eye on." he held contact with Annie for a moment, trying to get it through her head.
With a huff, Annie folded her arms over her chest. Jeff's eyes roamed the table, watching as everyone was cowed or glared back at him, but nobody commented, at least. Nodding, Jeff flipped over the page of his book.
"Alright. So. Studying, yes?" he said, voice edging back towards calm, losing it's angry edge. Everybody else seemed to agree, shifting their books open. "Good."
But for the rest of the study session, there was an awkward feeling hanging over them all. When they were done and got up to leave, there was no banter. Just the group splitting up to head home.
Annie caught Jeff as he headed out the doors, lifting his phone to his ear to call a cab.
"Jeff!" she called out, making Jeff turn and lower the cell, a question in his features.
"Do you want a lift home?" she asked, and he frowned at her. "It's the least I could do, after shouting at you." she said, adjusting her backpack strap a touch sheepishly. Caution was colouring Jeff's features, as he wondered at Annie's motive.
"Are you going to use the journey to try to pull the same crap you did back there?" he was being unnecessarily harsh, and Jeff was aware of it. He sighed, eyes diverting down from hers, not wanting to read the response to his vicious response. "Sorry. Uh." frowning, Jeff's lips scrunched slightly, a familiar sign of guilt and uncertainty. "Fine. Alright." he allowed it. Annie tried not to show how pleased she was, but still beamed and rocked on her heels.
Following the smaller figure into the car park, that eyebrow perked again at the sight of the shitty little car Annie was unlocking.
"Wow." the sarcasm was strong in his voice, "Nice car, Annie."
"It's all I could afford." Annie objected, looking slightly hurt, "And it still works. Not all of us used to be big shot lawyers, Jeff. Some of us actually have to struggle for our money." Getting into the car, folding himself into the small space, Jeff felt a little hint of guilt that he actually seemed to have upset her. Jeez, definitely a day for guilt.
"I thought you got a job?" he asked.
"I've been trying. Not many people want someone who's been through rehab, Jeff." a frown popped into it's usual place on Jeff's features.
"It's not exactly like you were on heroin." he said, a touch shortly, "It was adderall. If people are refusing you a job on that, I could probably sue them for you. Guarantee yourself a job, and get some cash in the process." he offered.
"Yeah, but then nobody would ever want to hire me because I was the girl who sued someone over a job rejection." Annie pointed out. Jeff saw her logic and sighed, clicking his belt up.
They drove in quiet for a few minutes, pulling away from Greendale and out onto the roads proper. It was an unpleasant drive - not in and of itself, but because Annie's car was absolutely atrocious. For Jeff it was more of a challenge, because he was mostly leg and had to fold himself into the small space with difficulty. His chair didn't move back at all. Trying had resulted in a nasty grating noise and he hadn't tried to force it, worried he might actually snap the seat clean out of Annie's crappy car. As it trundled along, Jeff looked over at Annie, who was focused on the road with her usual focused expression. She was a careful driver, which wasn't surprising, but not careful to the point of idiocy.
"It's a right here." Jeff said, before they came to the turning, and she willingly turned the car right. His eyes moved over her, uncertain.
"Listen, uh, Annie. I'm sorry for snapping at you in the study room." he said, cautiously. Her eyes didn't move from the road. "I know that you're just looking out for me. All of you are. But I'm an adult, and I can look after myself." he looked out the window in front of him, not noticing her tightening grip on the steering wheel. "I know I dropped the ball a bit, with the concussion. But you guys don't have to be on egg shells with me all the time. I'm not about to pass out on you again."
"It's not about that, Jeff." Annie said, and he was surprised by how short she was being. "You don't get it. You can't get it. When I was in rehab, some of us... didn't make it. Either ended up back on the drugs, or... worse. Which was why I recognised it with Neil." she swallowed hard, but not looking at Jeff was helping her speak. "But I thought how weird it was that you came to me. Because you recognised it too, Jeff." her eyes flickered over to him for a moment, then back to the road. "How could you recognise those symptoms? Recognise them - and actually well enough to care?" her fingers were almost white on the steering wheel.
"... Left here." Jeff said, after a long, uncomfortable pause had passed. Annie turned. Letting another moment pass, Jeff exhaled slowly, getting control of his breathing.
"I wasn't hiding it on purpose. I mean, yes, I was, but I wasn't doing it out of some - some urge to end it, Annie. I wasn't trying to be brave or whatever you think it is. I was just... it didn't seem so important any more." christ, was he really admitting this to her? Old Jeff would never had done this, would never had admitted all this, but his third year of being with the group had very clearly influenced the ex-lawyer to be far more open. "I don't know, Annie. I'm not the same person I used to be. I guess sometimes that ... messes me up a little. Throws me off balance, I suppose." silence fell in the car as Annie mulled over what he said.
"Just up the end of the road here, this apartment block." Jeff said, gesturing. Annie pulled in, parking in a spot next to his Lexus. Unclicking his belt, a faint sigh escaped from his chest. One hand rested on the handle, digits slightly curling, seeing Annie's eyes were still vacantly staring out the windshield.
"I'll see you tomorrow." he murmured, getting out of the car. The door clunked shut behind him. In his apartment, feeling the headache bubbling up in the base of his skull, Jeff went and got himself a glass of scotch. Despite the warnings on the packaging, alcohol was definitively his answer for how to deal with the day. Escapism. What a beautiful thought.
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Thunder roared almost as loud as the rain. Students moved between spaces at high speeds, droplets ricocheting from the ground to darken jean ankles and saturate socks. Shimmering umbrellas were held close to heads and the miasma of vapour created a veritable curtain. Through this Jeff ran, long limbs eating the ground below him, leather jacket held carefully over his head to avoid ruining his well-styled quiff. At the library doors, he momentarily slid out of it, shaking the fabric out to remove as much water as possible, before sliding back into it and dripping his way in, towards the study room. The group was already assembled, per the norm; waiting for him. Shirley and Annie were dry. Britta's hair was slicked down to her face, but she had a wet jacket on her chair and her torso seemed to have avoided being soaked. Pierce was in a similar situation; while Troy and Abed were soaked to the skin.
"Let me guess. You two decided to try swimming on the flooded quad?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Woah." Troy's eyes widened, "Why didn't we think of that?"
"We were re-enacting a scene where Inspector Spacetime and Constable Reggie get caught in one of the acid storms on Platoo Five." Abed said, happily. Outside, thunder rumbled again, and the lights flickered slightly.
"Good to know Greendale's electrics are dealing with this in the way most of Greendale deals with anything." Jeff commented, wryly, "Giving up. Right." he draped his damp jacket on the chair and considered the group before him. "What are we looking at today?"
"We need to read chapter six for Professor Kane." Annie commented, her book and notes already in front of her, "Then I thought we could go over the notes from the last lesson and make sure we have our essay plans done." life as normal, then. "And this time, I'm not writing them for you. I'll help, but I'm not doing all the work." Jeff found himself grinning, knowing Annie would end up doing most of the group's for them. Especially as they were all getting a shared grade. His headache had faded, and there was no need for the pills. In fact, he'd left them in the car. Catching Annie's eyes, she smiled back at him. It was fine.
They were all finally gonna be fine.
Of course, it was at this moment that there was another roll of thunder, a crack of lightning flashing outside, and all the lights plunged off, leaving them in darkness. The study group began shouting until Jeff shouted louder, making them fall silent. In the gloom, a small, slender hand found his and hung on tight.