Chapter Text
July 18th 1985
Oliver swivels back and forth in his chair lightly chewing on the end of his pen. Starting out the window to a slow, late afternoon summer. There are a few students lounging on the lawn outside his window. Oliver blankly stares for a while; not really focusing on anything. His office hours had ended two hours ago but he wanted to finish grading a few more papers before his weekend started. No classes on Friday meant three day weekends while he taught during the summer. Oliver’s officemate, Frank, had left at noon to head upstate to visit family. Most of the Philosophy Department had also gone home by now and Oliver sensed the quietness that had settled over the building.
In the past, summers were typically a busy time for Oliver. In between visiting family, traveling to Nantucket, parties with friends, concerts in the park and work happy hours, Oliver found that these hotter months flew by. Apart from two summers ago, of course. No, that summer was different. But he tried not to dwell on that. However this summer was turning out to be quite the opposite. With Micol calling off the wedding last October and most of their friends siding with her, Oliver found himself with plenty of time on his hands.
There was a sharp knock on the door and Jenny, an assistant professor in the department, stuck her head in.
“And why are you still here Mr. Weiss?” She smiled at Oliver.
He breathed out and turned more to face her. A slight grin on his face, “I was just about to leave, actually. Any plans for the rest of the day?” Oliver started straightening the papers on his desk. Planned to leave them there and finish grading them on Monday. He stood up and grabbed his keys from the drawer and walked to where Jenny was standing.
“Nothing much planned, no. My boyfriend and I might take a walk in Morningside Park later this evening but that’s about it. How about you?” Jenny stepped aside to let Oliver lock the office door. Oliver hummed in interest and said, “Looks like another boring evening for me. Not much planned. I have laundry to do and a few other errands to run. I will try and enjoy this sun though.” He looked up at Jenny and saw that she was smiling at him but also had a look of sympathy in her eyes. That’s been an annoying theme with his female colleagues ever since the wedding was called off.
He and Jenny walked in silence down the stairs and towards the front doors of the building. He turned to her, “Well, I should get going. Have a good weekend.” She nodded and waved while turning to walk across the lawn. Oliver watched her go for a little while before heading to his apartment, which was only a few blocks from Columbia.
Once back at his small one bedroom apartment he made quick work of cooking up some boxed macaroni and cheese. He typically liked to cook food that wasn’t from a box but on his walk back to his apartment he had made up his mind on what he wanted to do for the rest of this afternoon. He was suddenly in a hurry to get back outside. He ate quickly and changed into khaki shorts and his blue and white baseball t-shirt. While restyling his blonde hair he put on a navy baseball hat and sunglasses.
Oliver jogged down the stairs in his apartment building and stepped out into the humid air. He walked quickly to the Cathedral Parkway subway station, adverting his eyes to passing pedestrians. While waiting on the platform for the 1 train, he stared at the subway tracks and tried to slow his breathing down and settle his stomach. His body reacted like this every time he made the decision to go down to the piers. A twist of excitement, nerves, shame and lust. He boarded the 1 train and rode until the Christopher St station. He walked quickly down 10th street, mainly watching his feet put one in front of the other. He slowed his pace briefly once he was close to Homme , a gay bar he often spends time in. His eyes landed on the open door and could see the bartender wiping down the counter. A few patrons sipping on cool drinks. Since it was still late afternoon, it wasn’t busy. Oliver continued west toward the river.
Once getting to West Street, he crossed the road and got to the wooden barricades the city had put up in a halfhearted attempt to stop the undiscerning behavior that lived on the other side of the walls. Oliver walked to a slight break in the wall and quickly looked around and behind him. No one was there so he slipped through. As soon as he made it to the other side of Pier 52 he saw two men, with their pants around their ankles, kissing and grinding against each other next to the old wooden structure. They paid no attention to Oliver so he kept walking. Oliver walked slowly through the abandoned warehouse that once stood as a marine mechanic shop and storage facility. Although the inside was mainly a dilapidated warehouse, there were remnants of old offices where men who wanted to be semi private could go. As Oliver walked he could hear quiet whispers and moans. Some grunts behind him. His cock started to stir; desire pooling in his stomach.
Oliver didn’t cruise the piers frequently. He went enough to know the etiquette and rules, but not enough to recognize reoccurring faces. With the threat of the virus and undercover cops, he tended to cruise or take people home from the bar or gym. Even though the same threats were there, there was something even more discrete, private and comfortable about it than out in the open at the piers. However our at the piers, there was a different type of thrill. More dangerous too. Not just with the activities being out in the open but the hazardous rotting structures and a high rate of burglary and violent crime. It seemed like younger people also came here, so there was a risk for Oliver that he could run into a student. Which is why he kept his hat and sunglasses on at all times especially in the summer. Oliver can’t pinpoint why he started going to the piers or the bars. It started about three years ago. Probably to get away from Micol at first. But in the more recent months, Oliver had to admit to himself he was probably trying to reclaim memories from a certain past summer.
Oliver stopped walking when he reached the back of the warehouse where a couple of men were standing and lazily staring at those who passed. He tugged his cap lower on his head and surveyed the men. There was an older gentleman who was smirking at him, pass. A Wall Street businessman still in his suit doing coke off his hand, pass. He looked to the right and saw a younger man who was also looking at him. He had short light brown hair, brown eyes, full lips, black running shorts and no shirt on. Instead a green t-shirt was slung around his neck. Oliver coughed lightly and licked his lips. The younger man stood straighter and watched him. Oliver’s cock was getting uncomfortably hard, and while looking at the brunette, he tugged at himself through his shorts. Three quick tugs and the younger man gave a short nod, then cocked his head to the right where there was a large metal structural pole. Oliver sauntered over behind the pole, thankful to get away from the leering older man. He unzipped his khaki shorts and pulled them down just enough as the younger guy came around the pole. He gave a small shy grin to Oliver, and Oliver returned it with a tight smile and nod while pulling out his cock and stroking it softly. Precome already dripping out of the tip. The younger man dropped down to his knees and took Oliver in his mouth. Oliver let out a long breath, thankful that there wasn’t a big song and dance before the blowjob. He laid a hand on the man’s head and could see him palming himself through his running shorts. After a while Oliver could sense his own orgasm building and pushed the younger man’s head off of him. He came with a grunt onto the man’s cheek. Oliver could feel the blush rising in his cheeks.
“Sorry.” He muttered quietly and looked away.
“Don’t be.” The younger man said with a light quiet laugh. He took the green t-shirt that was around his neck and used it to wipe the Oliver’s come off his cheek and winked at Oliver.
“Do you….” Oliver trailed off while gesturing to the other man’s crotch.
Shaking his head no, the other man said, “It’s okay, I plan to be here for a while. Hoping to run into someone special. You should go outside though, lots of sunbathers out today.”
Oliver smiled and zipped his shorts back up. He reached out a hand and helped the other man up to his feet. “Thanks.” he said quietly to Oliver. Oliver cleared his throat and said goodbye while walking out of the warehouse and onto the edge of the concrete pads of the pier.
The younger man was right. There were many sunbathers laying out nude on beach towels. Mainly young men who held no shame about their bodies just yet. There was more chattering than in the warehouse. Even still, there was a heavy tone of secrecy about. Some men were engaging in sex out here, but for the most part there were people just hanging out, playing cards or reading. Oliver pushed his sunglasses up the bridge of his nose and continued looking at the sight before him. He sighed and wondered what it would be like to shed his clothes and lay out here with these men who he shared the some of the same secrets with. He walked slowly to the edge of the concrete and crouched to sit, dangled his long legs off the edge, propped his hands behind him and tilted his head up to the sun. Enjoying the warmth on his face. His back was to the sunbathers, so he didn’t worry about being seen or found out for now. Oliver wanted to try and relax for a little bit before heading back home. With his eyes closed he listened to the chatter and the water from the river sloshing against the side of the pier. He felt satisfied but could also still feel a slight pang in his chest. The image of Elio’s pink lips flitted through his mind. Oliver winced and tried to think of the encounter he just had. Those other lips instead.
With the encounters Oliver had now, he learned to be content with the clandestine and often quick sex that was offered. He had to be. Even with the wedding being called off, a long term homosexual relationship was still out of the question. His parents were already baffled and frustrated about him and Micol parting ways. And beyond all the societal and parental judgement, there was still only one person he yearned to be with and would break the rules for. Elio. Elio, who had not responded to a single letter or call over the past year and a half. Granted Oliver was writing to and calling the villa, and the Perlman’s never really let on to what Elio was doing or where he was going to college. He assumed Elio went off to a conservatory somewhere in Italy or France, but hoped his parents would relay the messages to Elio. At the very least, let Elio know about the nonexistent wedding.
Oliver started to notice that it was getting quieter. He looked around and saw that many of the men were having sex rather than talking. As Oliver was getting up he looked across to the end of the concrete pad. A mop of brown curly hair in another man’s lap caught his eye. The curly haired boy was laying on his stomach while his head bobbed up and down in the other man’s lap. His pale back and small ass looked so strikingly similar. Oliver’s mouth went dry and he narrowed his eyes to try and see better. He couldn’t make out the face of the boy. Oliver’s breath quickened as he watched the man thread his hands in those curls and using a little more force to press the boys face into his lap. Could it be, Elio? No. Oliver reminded himself that he usually always thought this with any curly haired, thin, and pale man. But there was something in the boys movements that didn’t convince Oliver that it wasn’t Elio. Oliver felt a hand on his ass.
“It’s lovely to watch, isn’t it?“ a voice whispered in Oliver’s ear while massaging his right buttock. Oliver turned to see the same older man from earlier inside the warehouse was smiling at him. Oliver grimaced and stepped away noticing the slight pout the older man gave. Turning and not looking back, Oliver quickly walked back through the warehouse and to the wooden barricade lining West street. Peeking out on the other side through the break in the wall he made sure there weren’t any pedestrians around and stepped out on the sidewalk. He let out a long breath and made his way back to the Christopher Street subway station for the journey back to his apartment.
Once Oliver got back home he stripped his clothes off and cranked the shower to the hottest setting. Stepped in and sighed, feeling the water pound into his flesh. He scrubbed every inch of his body. Maybe in hopes of also scrubbing the afternoon off of him. Once finished, he got out and toweled his body dry. Brushed his teeth and crawled into bed without putting any pajamas on. He closed his eyes and felt the cool sheets around him. Listened as his breath slowed and the window air conditioning unit clattered on. He focused on the visual of the boy with the curls earlier. Tried to compare, from memory, Elio’s curls, Elio’s ass to this boys. It was just so similar to Oliver. Almost too similar. Oliver groaned after a while and flipped onto his stomach and willing sleep to take him. His head was starting to hurt from doing all the mental comparisons he could think of.
Ring-ring, ring-ring.
The telephone rang loudly. Oliver’s eyes flew open and he pushed himself off the bed, jogging to catch the phone. Suddenly feeling agitated with anticipation. Could it be Elio? Calling to say, “I saw you too.” While smirking into the phone.
“Hello?” He asked breathlessly. Looking at the analog clock on his oven. It was a little after eight-thirty at night.
A laugh on the other end, “Did I catch you at a bad time or a good time?”Oliver realized it was Charlie on the other end. His friend who he met while frequenting Homme a while back.
Oliver gave a slight laugh, “No, no. I was just resting. I think the heat is making me tired.”
“Too tired for a few drinks tonight?” Charlie asked.
Oliver thought about it. He’d have to go all the way back downtown again. He was comfortable at home and would prefer to go back to bed or try reading a new book he picked up the other day. Oliver inhaled. “Not tonight, Charlie. Maybe Saturday? Are you free?”
“Sure, Saturday works.” Charlie said, then a pause. “Are you alright?”
“Yes. I’m okay. Really. Just a little tired from this week. The students are more difficult during the summer since a classroom is the last place they want to be.” Oliver reasoned. Charlie was very in tune with emotions. A wonderful confidant and friend, but sometimes a little too aware. Oliver didn’t think he had sounded upset or irritated, but maybe the events of the afternoon were getting to him and leaked through his voice.
Oliver must have been convincing enough because Charlie said brightly “Alright. Well why don’t we meet Saturday night. Nine o’clock?”
“Sure. See you then.” Oliver smiled and hung up the phone. Pleased that he would have some plans this weekend. And maybe an excuse to return to the pier in hopes of seeing that curly haired boy again.