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"It was not my choice to make, Jacen," was the answer he got.
"Oh," he said. He let the words digest slowly while he focused on the blueish marble underneath the crib, and the soft, almost daintily carved diaper disposal.
"You make that face," Tenel Ka said, after an appropriate pause. She nudged his shoulder a little with hers, the way she used to do when he was falling asleep in levitation class. When he didn't respond she reached out with her arm and he took the baby automatically, letting her soft, rounded warmth settle against his chest.
"Sorry," Jacen said. "I just… when I pictured this I thought I'd be here. That's all."
He hadn't been making an effort to hide his emotions in the Force, but it warmed him a little anyway when Tenel Ka touched his arm, sliding her hand down until she could wrap his fingers in hers. "But you are here now," she said. "And Allana will know you. Even if she never knows her father."
She wanted him to smile, so he did a little. It was impossible to stay sad very long with Allana wrapping the edge of his Jedi robe around her tiny fist, mouthing on the fabric with toothless jaws. "Well when things are different, I'll be here for the next one," he said, unsure whether or not he was actually joking. "And the one after that."
Tenel Ka withdrew her hand from his carefully. "You optimism is your weakness," she said. But he saw the small smile on her face before she looked away.