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It never occurred to him that he caused most of that damage. He never realised that it had gotten this far. His brother always seemed so close, so near but so far. Every time he thinks about the younger, his head throbs, and his heart aches for the bond that was once between them. He wants to blame him, blame his brother for everything, blame his father for leaving, but he would only be lying to himself. Maybe the king was right 'it was never meant to be'. He's been gone for a long time, long enough time to forget and redeem himself. Yet he still taunts and takes advantage of everyone and everything.
Was he even the place to care ?
Surely not, he wants, no he needs the support of his younger brother. How had he not realised until now? How did he not notice? Maybe, he had drowned in his ideologies, or he had gotten obsessed with the idea of Dream as the saviour, the holy grail of the Esempii. He looks down at his once blonde-haired brother. His eyes no longer shone like the sea, glistening under the sun. Instead, they were dull. There wasn't even a flicker of spark in them. There was no life to them. He couldn't look his brother in the eyes, especially with those eyes. Those eyes held no iris, just singular pupils.
Every time he looked at his brother, the past flashed before him. The history reminded him of his wrongdoings and everything he wished to forget. He couldn't take back his actions, but what could he do to redeem himself? Apologise? What a joke. Him? Apologise? It would be like apologising to a tree and then cutting it down. He felt something squeezing his hand, and instinctively, he squeezed back. It was a familiar feeling, one he hadn't felt for a long time. It was warm and fuzzy. It sparked excitement in him, the same excitement when they had won the war. The war, the war-
Before he could think about the topic much further, he was yanked onto the couch. He felt arms wrap around him. Were his brother's arms always this skinny? The embrace was light, but the tenderness was there. Although, he desired the tight embrace he received in the past. For once, he decided to be grateful for the present and hugged back. Knowing not what came over him, he squeezed tighter. Why couldn't he protect the one person who stuck by his side? Why did he leave the one person who adored him despite all his flaws? Why, why, WHY? Tears rolled down his cheeks as he began sobbing into his brother's neck as if they were having their long-awaited reunion.
'I am,' he scrambled for the correct words, 'so, so, SO, sorry! I won't leave you again, I swear, I SWEAR! Please, please let me help you, be yourself again. Please'
He could no longer control his sobs. Pulling away from his brother, he fell to his knees, face looking down in shame. He tightly grabbed his brother's shoulders, he begged. The tears kept streaming. He felt like screaming; the pain was excruciating. The pain of knowing, the one he hurt the most, he should have loved the most. It was heartbreaking, but it was his fault after. If only he'd been better. If only he'd known better. He should have known better.
'You done drownin in misery Wilbur.'
'Leave me alone Tech-no-blade.'
'Quit yer whinin, and move over. I wanna hug Tommy too.'
'No'
'Wilbur, he's my brother too, quit yappin, and share.'
The pink-piglin hybrid grabbed the white-haired boy by his right arm, while the brown-haired man grabbed the left arm. The two tugged at the boy, both glaring at each other. They both wanted the affection of their younger brother, the love they did not deserve but wished to receive anyway. It was almost embarrassing to watch.
'Quit makin this hard for yer self Wilbur, let go.'
'No, I don't think I will.'
The twins continue to glare at each other with annoyance while tugging on either arm of their brother. If seen from a certain perspective, one could say it was almost cute. But then again, they were two functioning adults (one more than the other) pulling at the arms of their brothers as if they were children fighting over a toy. To their father, it was cute, embarrassing and amusing. He was still quite infuriated with his two older sons, but the scene, laid out before him, was amusing. The father had grabbed his communicator and snapped a quick silent photograph to relish upon later.
'Alright, that's enough from both of you. Quit tugging on his arms. The poor boy's gonna be sore after this. Both of you sort yourselves out before even laying a finger on him. I swear if you do, death will be like mercy. Got it?'
The twins glanced at each other, both having strong opinions about it. They mutually decided it was best not to retaliate, especially against father at this time. Wilbur was about to sit down, but Technoblade had forcefully grabbed onto his arm and yanked himself and his twin into the other room. Those two were going to be the end of him , the father thought. He thought the same about all three of them once, especially Tommy. But nothing can measure how much he longed for those moments with his youngest again.
'You'll never know what you have until it's gone.'
A tear rolled down his face as he kneeled next to the boy. Those eyes made him shiver, even if it was just a gaze. It wasn't of the person he knew. The father smiled, tended to the wounds of the younger, and redid all the bandages on his body. It was terrifying to see all the bruises and the cuts all over the boy's body. The body was pale and frail enough as it was, but knowing who caused it was more enraging. He pursed his lips and hoped, just maybe, the youngest would return to his former self. And when it happens, he'll be able to protect him.
He needed to be free of the chains tying him to his greed and manipulative manner. Philza wasn't proud of him, isn't proud of him, he isn't proud either. His twin wasn't proud of him.
'I'm sorry.'
'I know,' his twin had replied with the huff. He did not expect that, nor did he expect the next thing that occurred. Technoblade hugged him, tightly as well. He began sobbing for the second, third time that day. Who cares? He had been longing for both of his brothers for a long time, one of which he mistreated to a point of no return. But maybe there was a return? He hopes so, the server needs Tommy back, they need Tommy back, he needs Tommy back.