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“I swear, how am I supposed to stretch the effects of music on young kids into 300 words?”
Jeremy sighed. Of course, when the time came to hold the Mad Doctor’s friend hostage, the friend would turn out to be a total idiot. Did this guy even know about his roommate's ‘hobby’?
The guy, who had introduced himself as the ‘Ren diggity dog’ turned to Jeremy, a slight frown on his face.
“Well excuse me if I’m the one prioritizing school! Honestly, if either of us is a doctor it’s me, I’m the one working on his doctorate! All Doc ever does is leave his dirty clothing everywhere, have you seen his room? And they call me a hoarder.”
Jeremy blinked, “I… I didn’t–”
“Nah, dude. I’ve got psychic powers,” Ren wiggled his fingers next to his head and chuckled at Jeremy’s look of confusion, “I’m just kidding! I’ve got, like, this sixth sense for when people are thinking smack about me.”
“Th-thinking smack?”
Ren nodded emphatically, “Yeah, like talking smack, but just thinking about it.”
Jeremy sighed inwardly, as Ren turned back to his notebook, which he had complained bitterly about when he found out that Jeremy wasn’t going to let Ren use a laptop.
There was blessed silence, until:
“Hey, what’s a synonym for calm?”
This time, the sigh was outward as Jeremy replied, “I don’t know.”
Ren tisked and crouched over his notebook once more.
“Hey Ren, why are you still so focused on your school work? I mean, most people would be too worried. Y’know, with cops here and all that.”
Ren shrugged, “I mean…. Cops are cops, but essays are also essays and professors are professors. And no offense, but of the two of you, I’m more scared of my professors.”
“Soooo… What's it like living with a mad scientist?” Jeremy asked.
“Honestly dude? I lucked out. I had this one friend, right, and he found a roommate on craigslist, same as me. Apparently, the guy was an ass, never paid rent, made my friend get all the groceries, all that stuff. At least Doc lets me stay here for free, although I do have to do all the cooking. I swear, that man could burn water if you gave him enough time.”
Jeremy shrugged, “Sounds like a pretty good deal, not gonna lie. Except for the whole supervillain thing, obviously.”
Ren shook his head, “Not really. I mean, I’ve yet to see him kill anyone, and he generally keeps that whole thing out of the house. Until now, that is.”
Jeremy was about to reply when footsteps sounded outside the apartment, followed by the sound of a door being blown open. A tall man in a lab coat, stained jeans and gas mask stands in the doorway. A smell of burnt hair fills the room.
Jeremy remembers why he was posted here in the first place, and slid his gun out of its holster.
“Freeze!” He held it to Ren’s head, who still hadn’t looked up from his work, “Or your friend gets it!”
The man sighed, and before Jeremy could react, the man had whipped out something that looked like an 80s sci-fi gun, but ended up shooting out a net that entangled Jeremy, leaving him tied up on the floor.
The man, who Jeremy assumed was Doc, addressed Ren, “You ok? I am sorry, I didn’t expect this.”
Ren grinned, “Yeah, man, it’s all good!” He corrected himself, “I mean, the fact that I got held at gunpoint wasn’t good, but hey! You got here just in the nick of time!”
Doc chuckled, “I thought it was only heroes who did that?”
“I mean,” Ren’s grin widened, “Isn’t the point of villains to break the rules?”
“True. Anyways, want me to take this guy out?”
Ren nodded, “You do that, I get you something to eat?”
Doc nodded, “Gotcha.”
Jeremy’s eyes widened with fear as Doc strode towards him, but the man just slung Jeremy over one shoulder and walked out onto the balcony. Never mind this was worse.
As if sensing Jeremy’s trepidation, Doc huffed out a snort, “Kid, did you really think we were gonna kill you?”
Jeremy nodded vigorously. He couldn’t get his mouth to work for some reason.
Doc sighed, “It is always the same with you lot. Always assuming the worst. I am not going to kill you, kid. Just gonna try to get you back to the station.”
Jeremy almost relaxed, until he heard the gravelly voice by his ear take on a much more threatening tone.
“But. If you, or anyone else tries to get Ren involved like that again, I might not be so generous.”
With that, Jeremy fainted, waking up later at the station with a note taped to his forehead.
He quit the force two days later.