Chapter Text
The car door shuts under Punz’s hand, signifying the end of his work day and letting the tension from his shoulders flood out. Manual labour can be hard, he has found, but it’s the reward of oil slicked hands and happy customers that lets him find the energy to return to the car garage day after day.
He likes the work there, but as Punz wipes off his hands again on a random oil rag, he starts his own car with the single idea to go home and sleep.
Turning onto the street, Punz hums to the radio that’s constantly playing and wonders what he should make for supper. He’s sure that Dream is home by now — a quick glance to the dash tells him it’s about ten past five — and it was his turn to do the grocery shopping this week. It isn’t that Punz doesn’t like when Dream gets the food, but the dude is a total health nut and comes up with the strangest recipes sometimes.
Punz finds it a little endearing. He doesn’t mind following obscure instructions if it means that Dream will laugh at him in the process, and he really doesn’t mind how Dream will offer him new things to try that he likes personally. It’s a win for the both of them, if he’s honest.
Dream gets to eat the food he likes, and Punz gets to see him smile.
It doesn’t take long for him to get back to the house, pulling into the small driveway and noting the lack of lights on inside the living room window; Dream has a habit of not turning them on when he watches television or is on his laptop and Punz tells him it might be part of the reason he needs to get glasses.
His assumption is proved correct when Punz walks through the front door, leaning down to untie his boots and glancing over at the living room—Dream is sitting on the couch, legs up on the cushions and laptop balanced on his lap. He looks up when the door closes behind Punz, and any leftover exhaustion from the garage falls away when Dream’s grins.
“Hey. How was work?”
“Long. I’m still working on that Pontiac, it’s being dumb,” Punz responds, pushing his boots to the side with his socked foot and out of the way of the door. He walks further into the house, listening to the way Dream hums to fill the silence as he makes his way to the kitchen. “Did you get groceries today?”
“Yeah. I grabbed more apples, too.” Dream’s hands reach up as the man stretches, leaning back over the arm of the couch as a tight sound escapes his mouth. He looks over at Punz as he does, a dopey smile spreading over his face as he does. “I know you said that you were wanting the other kind for lunch and snacks and stuff, so I got more of those.”
Punz can’t hide his own pleased smile, and he opens the fridge as though it would hide the red of his expression. He mumbles his thanks to the packed shelves, filled with leftovers and things that Dream had recently bought, and then the massive jug of apple juice that they keep in there.
He doesn’t think much of it when Dream enters the kitchen, abandoning his laptop on the counter and leaning his elbows against the surface. Punz can feel his eyes on his back, tracking him with viridescent flickers and not letting up for a single second.
After a few minutes of debating what he actually wants to eat, Punz settles on just warming up food that Dream made about a day ago. He reaches up to grab a plate and push it into the microwave, the back of his neck prickling with the weight of Dream’s gaze.
Buttons beep, and the hum of the microwave has him turning around to lean against the countertop. He crosses his arms, raising a brow at Dream, who jumps in his seat as though he’s been caught.
“Dude, what’s your deal? I can literally feel you staring at me.”
Dream’s fingers pause on the countertop, freezing where he had been tapping them insistently through his death stare at Punz’s back. He meets his eye now, brows pulled down as though he was nervous over something; Punz stares back at him, waiting for an answer as the microwave works behind his head.
“I don’t have a deal…” Dream mumbles, but the way he looks to the side and chews his lip is damning evidence that he’s lying.
“Bullshit. If there’s something bothering you, you know you can tell me, right?” Punz tips his head to the side like it would capture Dream’s gaze again, but he seems adamant on staring at the wall to the right—Punz swears that he can see the slightest hint of a blush on Dream’s face, but it could also be the lighting. “You’re being weird.”
A terse moment passes, complete with Punz waiting for an answer that won’t come and Dream’s odd shifting in his seat. He’s never had a problem talking about his issues before, so what could be so bad — upsetting? — now that ‘s got him all choked up?
The microwave beeps, and Punz turns to get his food out of it—
“Okay, okay, I have a really stupid idea, but—well, it’s been on my mind for a while.”
“Oh?” Punz lowers the plate to the counter, hissing as he burns the pads of his fingers on the edge. He doesn’t turn back to face Dream, not quite yet. “Like what?”
Dream’s fingers resume their pattern on the countertop; Punz can hear the drumming of them, quiet taps from the pads of ink-stained fingertips. “You’re gonna make fun of me for it.”
Punz laughs at that, sudden but not mean. He’s still facing away from Dream, unable to read his expression as he gets cutlery and a napkin or two. He doesn’t know where Dream is leading this. “Probably, but it’s not like I’ll be rude about it. Is it about school? Or work?”
“Kinda.” Dream is silent for a second. “Have you, like—God, this is stupid—have you had any experience with relationships?”
He nearly drops his fork. “Are you joking?”
Punz turns around, a disbelieving smile spreading over his lips as Dream’s embarrassed face comes back into view. He looks red, all with shifting eyes and a set to his mouth that almost makes Punz want to bully him more. One of Dream’s shoulders lifts in a mild shrug, and warm amusement flares in the pit of Punz’s stomach.
“You’re asking me—” Punz motions at himself with the fork, “If I have any relationship experience? Dream, you literally knew me in highschool, I had like two girlfriends.”
“Told you it was stupid,” Dream says, nearly pouts as he leans heavier against the counter and goes so far to drop his forehead on it. It doesn’t hide the scarlet of his ears, and Punz pokes through a soft broccoli stem as the mumbles continue. “It was just a question, not like it really matters.”
Punz chews on the vegetable, watching Dream for a few seconds longer.
It’s not like Dream is actively in a relationship right now, and Punz didn’t think that he was really looking for one, either. The entire thing seems a little awkward, and if it’s one of the first things that Dream asked him when he came home, it’s probably been on his mind for a while.
But, why?
Punz frowns, swallows, and just goes to reach for another bite of stir-fry when the realization smacks him in the face.
“Is this about George?”
Dream’s shoulders stiffen.
Bingo.
George — or the cute boy who works at the campus bookstore — is a shorter brunet with round glasses and natural bedhead. He’s friendly, decently funny, and Punz has met him a total of three times while picking Dream up from work. Because Dream works at the campus bookstore outside of classes. Because he and George are coworkers.
And, because Dream has a massive crush on George. Did he mention that one?
Punz thinks that George is a nice guy. He can’t go on to say much else because he’s really only talked to him twice, but at the same time Dream seems to get along well with him and the dirty blond is pretty good at determining people’s personalities. George is just a nice guy, and Punz hates the part of himself that wants to despise George.
Because George hasn’t done anything wrong. It isn't George’s fault that Dream has a crush on him, and it isn’t George’s fault that Punz is a fool that fell in love with his best friend. It just… ended up that way, you see.
Dream has a thing for George, and Punz has a thing for Dream.
“Dude, I know you have a crush on him,” Punz laughs, pushing down the tightness in his chest at the mere mention of Dream’s adoration. “Are you planning on asking him out?”
Dream shrugs one shoulder. “Dunno.”
His tone sounds off. Punz frowns.
“Why? You like this guy, don’t you?”
He doesn’t answer, and Punz… doesn’t know what to make of it. Dream is usually enthusiastic about any topic concerning George, and even if there’s never been a conversation about them getting together, Punz has always been sure that’s where their friendship was headed.
Punz stares at Dream as though he could decipher the point of the conversation; why would Dream bring up relationships, and why was he sitting in silence at the mere mention of George? He’s never been interested in Punz’s dating history before — not beyond any light jabs at ex’s, that is — so why talk about it now?
Could it be—
No way, right?
“Dream,” Punz says carefully, “Have you ever dated anyone before?”
He can see the way Dream’s tongue pokes to the side of his cheek, but even if that refusal to answer wasn’t enough, the way Dream’s ears flare red is completely telling.
Oh.
Oh.
So it isn’t that Dream is afraid of asking George out… but he’s afraid in general because he’s never done it before?
Punz’s silence must urge Dream into speaking, because before the blond can get another word out, Dream is rambling in front of him.
“It’s not that I didn’t want to. Like, obviously I wanted to date people, but I never had time and didn’t really care that much, y’know?” Dream shifts on the stool and doesn’t look at Punz. “It wasn’t something I was focused on so none of it ever happened. Like, ever. Yeah. So. I’ve never actually dated anyone and I was wondering if you could—”
Dream winces, cutting himself off. Punz can only stare at him, mouth slightly open as he processes the multitude of words Dream just dropped on him.
“I was wondering if you could—I don’t know, teach me how to date?”
The words swirl around Punz’s mind.
Teach me how to date.
“Are you serious?”
There must be something in his tone that Dream picks up as positive, because the dirty blond perks up in his seat and meets Punz’s gaze head on. He didn’t expect Dream to even ask that, let alone want Punz to teach him how to date. How do you even do that? What is there to really teach?
Dating is simple. You fall in love too fast and you get your heart broken in the process, and on the odd times that it works out, perhaps you spend the rest of your life with that person.
Punz is pretending that he hasn’t found that person yet.
“Yeah. Kinda.” Dream plays with his own fingers, restlessness presenting in the way he picks at his nails. “I just don’t know how to do all the stuff you normally do with boyfriends or girlfriends and I don’t want to embarrass myself in front of George, I guess. I missed out on getting over all the awkward stuff as a teen, but you did it all, right?”
“Uh—” Punz glances to the side, something ugly welling in his chest as he realizes what exactly Dream means. “I guess so. Depends what you’re talking about.”
Dream is quiet for a second, and then he’s raising his hand to tick off points on his fingers.
“Well, I’ve never actually kissed anyone for starters. Secondly, I want to—”
“Wait, what?”
Dream’s mouth snaps shut. It opens again. “Yeah. Uh—I’ve never kissed anyone.”
“You’re—” Punz waves his hand at Dream, motioning at everything and nothing at the same time. “You’re serious? You’ve never kissed anyone before?”
The dirty blond shakes his head.
Punz blows out a breath. Dream has never kissed anyone before. He doesn’t know how that makes him feel; maybe a little sad for the guy? Kissing is fun, especially when you’re having fun doing it. He really did miss out on a few things, it seems, and Punz pretends that he doesn’t kind of pity Dream.
But, some sick side of him is ecstatic. Dream has never kissed anyone before.
He ignores that fact for now.
“We need to write this shit down, Dream.”
Dream’s eyes narrow. He looks a little suspicious, and Punz feels uncomfortable under the sudden scrutiny. “So you’re going to help me?
Help him. Teach Dream how to date someone.
Punz hesitates; he can see a million ways that this can go wrong, and all of them end with his heart broken in his palms. He assumes that by teaching Dream, they’re going to have a pseudo-dating thing going on, something where Punz shows him the ropes of—what? Falling in love?
This is a bad idea.
Punz’s skin is warm with the way Dream is looking at him, eager and almost a little desperate. He just wants to impress the guy he likes, and Punz can’t blame him for it, because doesn’t everyone?
He shouldn’t do this to himself. This is only going to hurt him in the end. He shouldn’t, but—
“Yeah. Yeah, fine, I’ll help you.”
Fuck.
“Really?” Dream says, and the smile that covers his face nearly makes Punz’s heart stop. “You’re not trolling, right?”
Punz inhales deeply and looks Dream right in the eyes, hoping that he comes across as honest and not expressive of the defeat that he feels in his stomach. He shouldn’t have agreed to this, but there’s no way he could back out now; Dream’s eyes are too bright and there’s a distinctive happiness to his voice that Punz wouldn't dare put out.
“I’m not kidding. I’ll teach you how to date, Dream.”
And when Dream smiles wider, grinning through a thank you that makes Punz’s heart squeeze, he pretends that everything will be fine if he pretends to date the guy he’s already fallen in love with. It’ll be fine.
He’ll be fine.
“What are we doing again?”
Dream stares down at the dining table, arms crossed and brows raised as he takes in the paper and pencils that Punz has spread over the surface. He might look a little silly sitting there, but now that he’s agreed to somehow show Dream how to date — and break his own heart in the process — he’s going to put his effort into this.
Punz won’t be the one with a happy ending, but if it means Dream gets to spend some time and potentially date the guy he likes, he would agree over and over again without an ounce of hesitation.
“I am writing down the plan for this shit,” Punz says, and flicks a pen across the table at Dream. It bumps into his leg, and Dream looks up at Punz with an amused stare. “You don’t even know how to date someone, so you can’t tell me this is stupid.”
“Don’t be a dick about it,” Dream mutters, and walks around the table to pull out the chair beside Punz. Their shoulders brush, and Punz licks his lips at the sudden change in distance. “It’s not exactly my fault.”
Punz chuckles at that, and reaches down and hooks his fingers under the edge of Dream’s chair, dragging him closer and letting their shoulders press together. Dream squeaks, a sound that Punz didn’t expect from him, and he laughs harder as Dream tries to justify it.
“Why did you do that!”
“You’re so easy to bother,” Punz grins, and Dream turns his face away with a scowl. “If you’re so upset about this, how are we supposed to get through the rest of the steps?”
Dream’s frown relaxes, and Punz can see the way his gaze wanders back over to the pages on the table. “Steps?”
“Yup,” Punz says, popping the p and shuffling the single sheet of looseleaf in front of him. The rest of the paper is there because he didn’t know how long it would take, but he actually came up with the so-called steps before Dream even sat down. “I’m gonna go through them. There’s only ten, and it’s not like you have to memorize them.”
“Do these steps have a name?” Dream asks, and reaches for a pen to twirl between his fingers. Punz watches the way it skims over his knuckles, much softer than his own and belonging to a library of secrets more than a room full of metal. “Or are they just the steps?”
Punz shrugs,and his eyes dance over the ink at the top of the page. “I wrote a name down at the top. Anyways—”
He goes through the steps that he had written down, explaining each one in some kind of detail and laughing at Dream’s reactions to what he thinks dating is about. It’s a pretty accurate list, or so he thinks, and they get through it without much fuss.
Dream’s leaning on the table by the time Punz lists off the last item, and he turns his head with blushed cheeks to look at Punz for the first time since they started this. His embarrassment is almost tangible, and Punz thinks that he looks adorable. He hides his smile behind the looseleaf as he speaks.
“So? What did you think?”
“It was…” Dream trails off, waving a hand in the air as though he could dispel their conversation. “It was alright. Not what I expected. You put a lot of effort into it, man, what the hell.”
Punz shrugs, feeling his face heat up at the insinuation. “Well, it’s not about me. I’m doing it for you, Dream, so of course I’m going to put some work into it.
“Oh.” Dream’s voice is warm, and he smiles softly at Punz. “Thank you. I know you were kind of against this at the start, but it really is a big help.”
“I wasn’t really against it,” Punz mumbles, but he doesn’t continue the sentence for fear of letting something else slip. He’s already shown too much of his heart by simply agreeing to help Dream in the first place, and then he had to go even farther and title the list something stupid. “Are you alright with this though? Pretending to date me while wanting to date George?”
Dream’s gaze is honest and open. “Yeah? Why wouldn’t I be? It’s just practise, it’s not like it’s real. If anything I should be asking you if you’re cool with it.”
Perhaps he should have paid more attention to what Dream was saying, but as soon as the word practise registered in his head, Punz was unable to concentrate on the rest of Dream’s sentence. He nodded along, understanding some of it and not caring enough for the ending, not when his ribs were bruised with the reminder that none of this was real.
He didn’t get to have Dream, but here he was: sitting with their shoulders pressed together at their dining table, and talking about how to fall in love with someone that isn’t Punz.
“I’m okay with it, Dream,” Punz lies, making his voice steady enough that Dream would never suspect he wasn’t telling the truth. “You know I don’t mind helping you out, and it’s just for a little bit right?”
Dream nods. “Yeah, like maybe two weeks tops. As much as I’d love to, I don’t want to take up all your time, y’know.”
You could. You could take up all of my time and I would beg you for a few seconds more.
“Okay, well—” Punz stands up, leaving the page on the table and collecting his phone. “I have work in the morning and I’m pretty sure you have class. I’m gonna head to bed, but I can clean this up tomorrow.”
“You sure?” Punz can hear papers rustling as he turns away, and glances over his shoulder to see Drema gathering some of them up. He pushes them to the side, but one of them makes him pause. “Ten steps to loving you?” Dream looks up at Punz, and Punz looks away.
“It’s just a title,” he says, hoping that he doesn’t sound nearly as defensive as he feels. Just the sound of Dream saying that title out loud makes him want to erase it from existence and pretend that he didn’t put that on the page in empty hope and fantasy. “The steps are what’s important, anyways—”
“No, no,” Dream smiles, and the dirty blond looks down at the list like it was something more than a few numbers and scribbles. “I like it. It sounds real.”
I thought you said this was all for practise.
Punz doesn’t know how to answer that, and he takes the chance to fill up his water bottle in the kitchen before heading to bed. Dream will probably be awake for a little — he usually is — but Punz has to help open the shop in the morning. Sleep is definitely ideal, but sleeping means that he’s going to be left alone with his thoughts.
“Goodnight,” he calls to Dream, and Dream’s head comes up to face him.
“Night, Punz,” Dream responds, a grin already in place across his mouth and eyes crinkled with what Punz knows as genuine happiness. “Get some sleep, dude. You look exhausted.”
Punz forces a laugh at that, rubbing the back of his neck as he walks farther down the hallway. The safety of his bedroom is a welcoming thing, and he lets out a haggard sigh as the door shuts behind him.
He feels exhausted. He also feels like he’s making a big mistake by agreeing to do this with Dream. Sure, it’s not a regret, but it makes his chest tight and head spin just thinking about the damage he’s going to suffer.
There’s only so much of his own feelings that he can hide, and Punz fears that by pretending to date Dream he won’t be able to keep them a secret much longer. While Dream may get a happy ending — and a boyfriend, if the steps are any good — Punz already knows where he’s going to end up.
As he gets ready for bed, he hopes that Dream isn’t picking apart all the things on that list. Punz made it within a few minutes, a product of brainstorming and filtering through his own experiences whilst dating a wide variety of people. He’s aware of the basic procedures, what to do and when to do it, and how often you actually follow through on such a standardized plan.
Punz wonders if the steps are more for himself. By writing down the ‘plan’, he’s putting up walls that might help lessen the attack on his heart; he can only hope that Dream won’t walk right through the gates and wreck him anyways.
“Whatever,” Punz mutters, falling down on his bed and gathering the blankets in his arms. Maybe he’s ignoring it all, but at the same time he doesn’t want to deal with the revelation quite yet. He’s aware of his own feelings for Dream, but what he won’t face is how badly those feelings are going to ruin him.
But, whatever. He’s got two weeks of happiness, and then Punz is better off making his own step-by-step plan of how to get over an idiot.
Fuck, he really is down bad, isn’t he?
Punz rolls over, glaring at the wall in the darkness of his bedroom. The pillow under his arms is crushed to his chest, and he closes his eyes tightly as though he could imagine Dream’s eyes flicking over the title on that piece of paper.
He named it ‘Ten Steps to Loving You’, for fucks sakes. How obvious could he have been?
It doesn’t matter. It’s all for practise anyways, and he knows this.
Dream doesn’t love him, and Punz is going to make sure that he gets the best ‘first relationship’ experience of his goddamn life.