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He dreams about Skeppy.
Skeppy playing in the fields. Skeppy pranking Technoblade. Skeppy giggling at Bad's silly remarks.
And sometimes he dreams of him holding his hand.
He'll stare at the ring on Bad's horn, and look down at his hand. He'll say silly stuff that doesn't make sense, but it makes Bad smile anyway. He'll start flirting to make Bad flustered. He'll hold his cheeks in his hands and just stare, saying endearing affections so quietly.
But Bad's favorites are when Skeppy and he are sitting together. Sometimes they'll sit next to each other on the ground. Other times he'll sit in the swing beside him.
And today, they were sitting on clouds, admiring the world below them. The DSMP server looked like it was brand new and that it didn't have a gaping hole in reality.
But neither of them minded. They were too caught up in each other to care.
They were talking. Talking about some stories or rumors they've heard being blown around the SMP. Or they'd talk about some funny things they saw.
The topic didn't matter, they were perfectly content just sitting there in silence if it came too.
Sometimes they'd kiss. Like they used to. In most of Bad's dreams, they would press a kiss on the others cheek. And in some, they would go dangerously close to each other's lips.
And they were content with that. Being on the edge, but never stepping over it.
But sometimes, they would cross it. The line would become blurred in their desire of want. And so they would go into the uncharted territory that's so familiar.
Then came the least favorite parts of the dreams.
Where Skeppy would pull away from Bad's embrace and look him in the eyes, to tell him exactly what he doesn't want to hear.
"You need to wake up, Bad."
And Bad would listen to Skeppy if he had asked for any other request.
He doesn't want to leave him. He wants to stay in his dream world, where everything is perfect, and everyone is alive. And where Skeppy remains.
And Skeppy would keep on insisting and Bad would keep on rejecting.
Until Bad would wake up.
And that was the most horrible thing he would ever experience.
He would call out to Skeppy, begging for him to let the demon stay. But Skeppy would only supply a sad smile and say,
"See you later, Bad."
And then Bad wakes up.
Bad would wake up. He would wake up to the one place he didn't want to be in. Where everyone is fighting, and everyone is dying. And where Skeppy isn't by his side to tell him that, "it's all right" and "I'm not going anywhere".
Because it's a lie. It's such a lie.
Skeppy isn't here by his side to tell him it'll be okay. Skeppy isn't here to tell him he'll never leave.
Because he left.
He left and it's all Bad's fault.
What makes Bad want to cry even more is the fact that Skeppy is never coming back, not even for his ring.
His ring to show he trusts Bad with all his being. His ring to show he wants to be with Bad forever. His ring shows that he loves Bad, always and forever.
"Always and forever." Bad repeats.
And he's never felt more broken over those words.